Due Feb/Mar after MC 🌈 🙈

[MooBugz]

Hi all,

4+3 according to Flo app, pregnant after a miscarriage in March at 11 weeks so feeling very anxious / scared and needed a safe space to speak about pregnancy worries without thriving anyone of joy!

Feel free to join and share the journey together.

Welcome @Furbabymum15 - hoping this is the one for you :) x We are all here for support when you need us.

@STom2 Glad you got a reprieve from symptoms yesterday. Maybe things will keep easing over the next few days? If not, could always tell MIL you have a tummy bug haha! Unless you are fine with telling her of course.

Combination of bleeding and brown discharge for me - it is only when I wipe at the moment so EPU won't see me. However, as I have said before I have a significant lack of symptoms...my boobs are a bit tender and I have had the occasional (and I mean very occasional) twinge of nausea but that is it. I definitely feel like its all ending for me and just can't help feeling like a failure. I read somewhere that 2 miscarriages in a row happens to like 2% of women and recurrent in 1%. How are we supposed to cope/feel knowing that our bodies won't do what they have been designed to do!?

Anyways, no point being down in the dumps all day - I've got work to crack on with so that will keep me occupied. Good luck for those of you struggling with the heat...I've been doing okay right now but I haven't exactly needed to physically do much so the heat probably isn't bothering me as much. Hope everyone has a good day :) x

@STom2 man, I know gow you feel about the house... DS's room is a constant 26 degrees and I can not cool it down. I worry so much and I'm roasting and can't sleep. I honestly can't wait for it to cool down in the autumn. I'm perfectly designed for a British climate of mild weather 😆

@Furbabymum15 welcome 🙏 What are your fur babies?! I have two basset hounds 🐶

@RedElleJ I wouldn't read too much into symptoms though as you haven't really had any from the offset have you? And you already have had a positive scan? Also, the fact you are only getting spotting when you wipe is also a good sign. And we know that brown is old blood.

@gamergirl84 Tell me about it! My sons room was 30 degrees last night when we were trying to get him to bed. Nothing I tried would cool it down. I had freezer blocks in front of a fan etc. Aircon unit arriving tomorrow thankfully.

I've been okay again since that little sick episode this morning so honestly I'm up and down about whether to go for another scan before I go on holidays Saturday. Having had a MMC before I'm paranoid. But also having had covid a couple of weeks ago, even more so. Not sure what to do really. I'm also hesitant about wasting time at my EPU as it's drop in. They might think I'm a fruitcake if I arrive in there again.

@STom2 @Gamergirl84 @RedElleJ @Lmcc88 Thankyou all for the Welcome it's nice to have company on this journey. I hope you are all well and feeling good xx
@Gamergirl84 I have a Cockerspaniel dogs are great aren't they so full of love he's my best mate ❤️

@Furbabymum15 I couldn't not have got past the last few years without my dogs. They're so innocent and loving ❤️ Love a cocker!

@STom2 never ever worry about using the EPU resources,- they're literally for people like you who need them hun so go use it .

I'm envious of your AC unit! I've also tried the ice in front of the fan trick 😆

Thank you @STom2 @Lmcc88 it was a relief and I'm already considering whether to get another or not haha! It was lovely though definitely gave me a better nights sleep.

Welcome @Furbabymum15 hope this time is a success for you 😊

My nausea has still been strong but my chest not as achey so thinking that the worst of the symptoms are over with and you hear around the 9th week is the peak so who knows. I mean I thought I was 9 weeks today but have my booking appointment tomorrow let's see what they decide considering the scan said 8+2. Feeing better now the appointments have started it makes it more real doesn't it

I completely get what you mean @STom2 but as I had this same discharge last time (and not nearly as much or as for long) I am feeling fairly triggered that it has happened again. I know people say that no symptoms isn't normal but not impossible; however, it just adds to the stress of it all. Last pregnancy - little to no symptoms, brown bleeding/discharge ended in MC so it is hard not to think the same this time round.

I am dealing with a lot of guilt too as I have previously had a termination (please no judgement I do that enough myself) and I just think that I have forced my body into thinking a pregnancy shouldn't continue or that I have caused harm. And then obviously feeling like it is just karma coming at you.

@STom2 definitely worth calling EPU, worst they can say is no I guess and then you could get a private one if you really wanted to. My EPU have been very clear that I won't be scanned again unless I am soaking pads or this continues until my booking appointment - then they will see me again.

Ohh that's exciting news about the booking appointment @MooBugz - definitely makes it feel real! Glad to hear you are feeling a bit better too.

Loving the furbaby chat - I have a Springer and a Sprocker...both absolute nut cases but love them no end :) x

@RedElleJ when is your scan due and are you considering going private beforehand if you are feeling worried about things?

Definitely no judgement here, everyone has their own circumstances and have to make some hard calls in life it's not karma at all. It's unfortunately just the unfairness that is in life and on the flip side it makes you appreciate the goodness when it happens so much more.

Don't be so hard on yourself you haven't done anything wrong here and if it does happen to be another mc then we'll deal with that if it happens. I took great reassurance after realisation that pregnancies end that way more often than not sue to abnormalities so our bodies save us from pain down the line and holding baby in our arms and having to say goodbye then. It's hard regardless of what has happened in the past and every feeling is valid please be kind to yourself ❤️

Where would I be without this thread!

Thanks @MooBugz - my next private one is Monday, I thought about bringing it forward but I think if it is the bad news I am expecting I will need to put an EC in for uni as I will struggle to focus on my thesis. I know that sounds ludicrous and that is what EC's are for but I really just want it out the way rather than looming over me and I reckon I can get it nearly finished this weekend.

Must try harder in the being kind to myself department...think its just been a rough few days and I need to take a step back from some self-care x

Totally understand what you mean about the symptoms and spotting @RedElleJ and I must say you do sound quite level headed about it. Also, absolutely zero judgement here!! As has been said people have to make difficult decisions, and that will not have impacted your future ability to conceive. Also, very wise decision to focus on getting your thesis out of the way. It's been many years since I finished mine, but I still know its absolutely no easy thing to do and takes so much independent focus and self motivation.

Also on the furbaby chat - we have a wire haired sausage. He's 6 now and is the OG baby in the house still. 🤣

@RedElleJ Monday isn't too far away either so that's wise thought process you have there ☺️ whatever happens know we are here for you and it's all part of the journey. You'll have incredible history to look back on when you meet the little one at last.

@RedElleJ it is so hard to keep hope when you're experiencing such things after your experiences, and I know you even question whether you should hope and you want to protect yourself by not hoping too much. And you've got nothing to be worrying about re: karma, you've done nothing wrong, it's our stupid society making you feel that way. It's bloody hard. Being more kind to yourself is a good shout.

Congratulations on the positive scans @MooBugz and @Gamergirl84, brilliant news, I'm so pleased for you both. You're so right about the temporary respite from the worry but any positive scan is a huge milestone I'd say!

Welcome @Furbabymum15, I have two cats. Am I still welcome here amongst all the lovely dogs?! ;)

Can 100% identify @STom2, when I didn't have symptoms I didn't like it or appreciate it and now they're back with a vengeance. Just can't win.

I bought an AC unit on the credit card in a previous pregnancy in a moment of OH GOD I CAN'T COPE. Drove to the other side of my huge city to collect the last available one and tbh it was the best extortionate impulse purchase involving a 2-hour round trip I've ever made.

In another extortionate impulsive act (someone take my credit card off me), I booked and had a scan today. Just couldn't handle not knowing what was going on with my up and down symptoms. And there was a little living blob, 8+4, two days ahead of schedule. The sonographer was a bit dismissive in her attempts to reassure me ("everything will be fine, don't worry") but I'm glad I did it. And DH was supportive even though it's not something we can really afford right now, he understood my anxiety.

Oof sorry this is a long one. Feel free to skip!!

Ahh @Hagster congrats on the scan! And that's a very much worth impulsive buy haha. Did you get emotional? I found it strange because the baby doesn't look like a baby yet and a blob as you describe it so perfectly loll but looking forward to the blob morphing into a little human 😊

Hey everyone!

so much to catch up on since I was last on!

Welcome @Furbabymum15! Hope you find everything you need here. I know we all have! Congratulations on your news and I hope it’s a little sticky one for you!

Congratulations @MooBugz @Hagster and @Gamergirl84 on your scans. I’m so happy for you all!

@RedElleJ please never think that what your going through now is due to past things. You made the right decision for yourself back then and your trying everything you can right now. I know we all here will never judge you and I understand the guilt and the feelings that come with it. Just please take some time to really look after yourself.

my symptoms are back with full force today. Haven’t been able to keep anything down. Really tired and headaches. Called into work sick this morning just mentally couldn’t cope, I hadn’t been sick at this point. Feel somewhat reassured but I’ve booked a private scan in England when we are home. Nervous to find any bad news out there but I don’t think I can do the full ten days not knowing what’s going on.

sending lots of love to everyone xx

Hi wondering if I could join? I'm currently 4+6 weeks with my second baby, straight after a miscarriage at around 5/5.5 weeks last month. Whilst I'm not quite past that point yet my tests never got super dark last time and this time they have so I'm feeling a little bit more positive (still testing at least twice a day though!). My due date is 16 March and I've booked a private scan for when I'm 8.5 weeks which feels like a million years away right now.

Just read through this whole thread and sorry to hear how tough everyone's journey has been and so sorry to those who have had bad news again x

Morning all and a welcome to @LittleLottle ☺️

I had my booking appointment this morning pretty routine stuff. Still debating whether to go for another scan or not in two weeks time but might just wait it out as nhs scan is only 3 weeks away. I should just be grateful the scan this week was good and just get on with it but as you all know so well it's not as easy as that!

Hoping that once we all get to the 12 weeks scans things start easing for us and we can enjoy the pregnancies ❤️

Hi @LittleLottle I'm in a very similar position to yourself! I'm now 4 weeks pregnant immediately after my loss.

It's soooo nerve wracking 😞

@MooBugz was your apt over the phone or in person? I got a text off my midwife to say she would sort my apt out soon but she is really busy. It seems where I am there are a lot of preggos right now! She said it would be before my scan though, which is in less than 3 weeks.

I cant decide on a private scan or not either. It's 65 quid and I currently feel so sick most of the time, I don't know if I can actually go through it with the worry as well!

Randomly my midwife just text with my appointment! It's 4 days before my scan 🤣

@madeinthe80z 4 days before! Cutting it fine lol mine was in person and the midwife took bloods too.

I caved and booked another scan for next Sunday afternoon, I'm back the night before but knew it would be in my kind and that should sort me out I think any anxiety I have has been around the 8/9 week mark as I had my booking appointment and miscarried that same week.

Symptoms are strong though so I'm sure everything is going as expected but good to have that reassurance and at £60 it's worth it and I know I won't want any more after as I'll have my 12 week scan the week after via nhs.

@MooBugz Ah yes, I forgot about the bloods and everything. I remember it being a really long meeting when I was pregnant with my daughter. All our maternity services have moved to the local hospital too so it feels weird going to the hospital for it all this time rather than the doctors.

I think our 12 weeks scans are close actually, mine is 2nd Aug, is yours the 3rd? I am thinking of booking a scan for this weekend but not sure if I can get anyone to have our daughter whilst we go and I dont think it's appropriate to take her, particularly if there's anything wrong

Yeah @madeinthe80z mine is the 3rd, I have a wedding all day on the 2nd so that's another reason I booked another scan for peace of mind.

The booking appointment is quite long it's the boring usual info they need from you family history etc so takes about 45mins-1hr

If you feel like an early scan go for it nothing better than peace of mind especially if you think you'll be thinking about it if you don't!

@MooBugz I'm definitely thinking about it. I keep thinking I wonder if I feel so sick because I'm pregnant or my body just thinks I still am 🙈 oh to be chilled out about this would be a lovely thing wouldn't it!! I'll see if my MIL is free and will book one in this weekend.

I would have spent £120 on scans but it's a small price to pay over being stressed and anxious if I didn't so I know it's expensive and it's annoying how people can make money from it but has to be done!

That's a good idea, tbh the scans themselves your in and out very quick you'll be lucky if your there any longer than 20mins in total so you wouldn't need a babysitter for long. Good luck!

@Rubes1234 @Hagster @MooBugz thanku for the Welcomes...

Just curious as we are all pregnant after loss..... Is a anyone doing anything for different this time..... I'm not having sex lol it may or may not help. What's everyone's symptoms too I'm 5+4 my boobs really hurt on the sides