Due May 2022 thread 5

[Kittycaz]

@midnight90 @MrsMay19 @JMill13 @YfenniChristie @EastMidsGem @morphe @Sarah239 @fejkalove @Mummyingetc @Orangesunshin @aNewYorkerInLondon @Bubbasmama2017 @GinnyBee @Lavendersblue42 @Honeymint @YummyMummyXoX @K834baby3

Hey all if I missed anyone please add. Noticed last board is almost full.

I got a potty out a month or so ago but could tell she wasn't ready, I sometimes ask her if she wants to sit on it when she doesn't have a nappy on but she's not interested. I'll try again in a few weeks when we can be at home for a few days in a row and the weather is good. I find it hard to not worry when she's not doing things when her friends are (like potty training)
She's just caught chicken pox which is not at all fun! Anyone else had it?

@Kittycaz our boy isn't talking yet either so that's so nice to hear that we're not alone! We've been referred for some sessions by the health visitor but she said it's a few months wait so no idea when that will be.

We've got a potty that looks like a little toilet and he goes to sit on it sometimes. We just tried popping him on without his nappy once a day now in the evening before bed. Not done anything in it yet but he doesn't seem to mind sitting on there. He definitely shows signs that he knows when he needs to go for a wee and when he needs to poo, he goes into a specific room in the house and closes the door to do it in private 😆

No chicken pox or anything else here yet, just colds. We now have a 3 and a half month old too so lots of chaos in this house

Congratulations :) It's actually a relief to hear your boy isn't speaking yet either @EastMidsGem we've got his 2 year review with health visitor next month and I think they will prob refer him for speech therapy. He's very smart and though and can understand most things he just struggles with communicating it to us and can get frustrated at times. Weve got him a potty a fisher price one in bathroom and he looks at it and has sat on it once or twice but hasn't done anything in it. He scared himself the other day by standing up in the bath tub and then he weed a little it freaked him out as it's the first time hes been aware of it happening (not gonna lie it made me laugh a bit).

@Bubbasmama2017 I think he had chicken pox last year as few weeks ago we were exposed to chicken pox by a friend who didn't know and her dd came out in spots that evening but it's been 20+ days and no spots on Leo. But last year he had spots all over but Dr said it was hand foot and mouth disease but I still have my doubts as he was very poorly x

I can’t tell you how nice it is when this thread wakes up again!

if anyone is interested, we followed the book, “Oh Crap! Potty Training,” and found it immensely successful. It’s a cold-turkey, all-in sort of thing, but in about 2 weeks we went from nothing to only a few accidents per week. I’m glad to answer any questions if you have any.

No hard feelings if it’s not the method for you though! There’s so much info out there!!

I think he did catch chickenpox this spring when it went around nursery, but he was vaccinated in the autumn, so he got like one pock and felt a bit unwell, but otherwise was fine.

Love to see this thread pop up! We've been umming and aaahing about potty training here. DS is aware of the potty and he sort of gives us a heads up when he's peeing and pooing BUT hasn't shown any interest in using it apart from sticking a soft toy on it. He is also getting more wound up / refusing nappy changes, so maybe we just need to be more firm on following through. Though I will say part of me just feels overwhelmed at the very thought of it 🤦🏼‍♀️

Our main focus at the moment is naps. What is everyone's DCs doing? DS currently has a 2hr nap at midday-ish. Nursery don't think he's ready but I have the grandmothers in my ear saying its nonsense and he's ready (though I think this is partly due to their inability to put him down for a nap).

@YfenniChristie , we definitely still need a nap in our house. He’s way too grumpy without. At nursery though, they’ve cut from 1h45m to 1h15m. At home, we usually wake him at 1h45 still.

@YfenniChristie we're finding exactly the same with nappy changes - he gets so wound up and doesn't want us to do it! But with the baby and with her being so clingy and needy with me, it's a bit of a nightmare. DS naps anywhere between 1-2 hours still in the afternoon depending on how much excitement he's had!

@Kittycaz ours is the same with his level of understanding. He gets so much of what we say but just can't voice it or chooses not to! We had the 2 year review at the same time as the new baby's 6-8 week check up as a home visit which was really kind of them. It was almost bang on 2 years for him. They referred us for I think they're called "just talk" sessions with a nursery nurse. Also a hearing check I think is standard just to make sure they don't have a problem with hearing certain tones as that can effect speech. We haven't heard anything about either yet.

Things that make me laugh about DS that I have to try not to laugh at are when he pours his water out of his sippy cup constantly, I pass him a cloth and ask him to wipe it up which he does... then he pours a little more out and wipes it up and grins at me like "Mummy look how well I can wipe it up!" 😆 other thing he does is if you leave your phone unoccupied, you end up with loads of selfies and little films

Oh look at his curls @EastMidsGem . My boy still has his but he hates hairdressers so even though they make him sweat they're staying for a while longer lol.
Leo's had half hour nap earlier but normally sleeps at night 8-7 so don't want to increase it as I think he's starting to drop it. We have noticed tantrums are getting a bit more full on now but I think it's because of his age and frustration. X

@Kittycaz you wouldn't think it but I've cut his hair 4 or 5 times in the last year! Curls still stay there and neither me nor his Dad have curly hair! We haven't dared try a hairdresser yet as he gets so worked up with professionals - usually doctors because of all the appointments he used to have for his feet and hands. Now he has far less so it isn't too bad thankfully. I find that curly hair is very forgiving with bad cutting 😆

He starts playschool at the end of August for 2 mornings a week 😫

@EastMidsGem so does Leo he starts nursery in September for 2 mornings also but I think it will be good for him especially with his communication. Got his trial session next week he likes going play groups during the week with me but I've never left him at one on his own before so it will take some getting used to. But from September it's all systems go and hopefully we will have some words by Christmas. We tried hairdressers but he screamed he's good with drs and dentist but he's petrified of the scissors same with his nails scissors screams when he sees them and gets hysterical we've tried most things me cutting dh's hair in front of him and nails taking him with me while I'm having my hair done but no dice. X

Aww bless him. He's so cute though! Hopefully nursery will help both of ours with their speech. I'm looking forward to him making some friends too

😍 Loving the curls! DS has curly hair like DH. It's long overdue a cut - was meant to have his first one just after his birthday but DH had a wobble and was worried he'd lose all his curls.

It's not usual for DS to come home from nursery with his hair in a bun or ponytail. Apparently he likes to get involved when the little girls have their hair tied back.

Heyyyy! We're not potty training yet either. I tried introducing it some weeks ago and he excitedly sat on it and did a wee a few times a day for about a week, and hasn't sat on it since, I guess the novelty wore off. I'll wait until he seems more interested.

Naps are a mess and have been since January! He pretty much doesn't sleep at home unless I take him for a drive, this has been the way since Feb. And in the car he can fall asleep as early as 10am! So I don't really believe he's ready to drop it, although he copes really well all day without one, mostly. We had one week of success with just little 15-20min cat naps that improved his night sleep, but that stopped working after a week and we're back to at least one wake, usually around midnight, and he comes into our bed pretty much every night now. And it seemed like after about 4-5 days of little naps he then needed a longer one. So currently he naps anything from 0-90min and I can't guess what it's going to be on any given day, and whether bedtime is going to be 7 or 10pm! I just want him to be done with it so I wouldn't have to do the daily mental gymnastics of trying to calculate likely bedtime based on what time he was up for the morning, how long he napped, and how late was it. 😂

On other news I was recently diagnosed with ADHD and started meds 6 weeks ago and holy smokes I feel better! I forgot what it's like to not be constantly exhausted and anxious, and the increased energy levels and calmness has made me a much better parent.

So lovely to hear some updates! They are all growing so fast!

We started potty training last weekend, it’s going well so far. I’m very ready to be rid of nappies as I’ve consistently had them since our first was born in October 2019.

To those with delayed talkers I just wanted to try and give a bit of reassurance. My 4 year old little boy has had delayed speech. We ended up potty training at 2 years 9 months, he still wasn’t talking but he understood everything from us and he got it really quickly. I always tried to remember that his speech may be delayed but he was ahead on other things. They are all so different and do things at their own pace. Watch the Bluey episode Babyrace!

We were referred to audiology where they identified a low to moderate hearing loss, after a few visits and consistent results we now have a hearing aid, alongside paying for a private speech therapist (NHS was a long wait and then not much help) he has developed so much. At his nursery graduation last week he stood up and spoke in front of everyone, we were so proud 😊. We have been waiting for about 18 months for an appointment with ENT as audiology think he has glue ear which may need grommets.

It has been a long journey but we can now have conversations with him - so please be assured that they will get there.

In comparison our 2 year old never shuts up - always talking, singing and dancing. It is amazing how different two children with the same genetics growing up in the same house are.

Sorry for the rambling post!

@Yellowbelly12 , oh my goodness you must have been just bursting with pride!!!

@aNewYorkerInLondon there were definitely a couple of tears shed. His teachers described it like The King’s Speech where he has now found his voice ☺️ it really is like that. We still have lots of work to do to help him but there is progress everyday.

Also, we have used the ‘oh crap’ potty training book for both of them and would definitely recommend it.

Lovely to hear all the updates. We are trying with potty training currently but mixed results! I tried the oh crap method about six weeks ago but I think it was too soon and he started getting quite upset and refusing to go on the toilet or potty. Nursery said they thought he wasn't ready.
Trying again in a bit more of a relaxed way and he is enjoying stickers and doing a couple of wees a day on the potty. Next step is to try nursery and then get rid of the nappies. Feels like a big milestone!
In other news he is sleeping in his own room most nights through now! Scared to admit to friends with newborns it took over 2 years to get there and it really feels like he just did it when he was ready. Still having a long nap most days.
I am loving this age though, I was dreading the terrible twos and obviously there are moments but in general he is so fun!

Hi there everyone how are you all and your littles. Leo is well and truly in terrible twos screaming arching back and things. He's a little darling at nursery though and comes home smelling of perfume from cuddling all the staff and bringing home all the illnesses on our third so far this year! We've got allot more words now he's still not great at sentences but gets his point across. He's started fighting changes very much so we're potty training but I don't think he's ready still so debating waiting until it gets warmer so he can run around the house naked and easier to use the toilet x

@Kittycaz , we potty trained last July and the warm weather was definitely helpful!!

so nice to see this threat pop up in my email!!

We have good and not-so-good days, but on the whole, we’re having more good than not, so that’s a win. So many big feelings though.

It has been amazing to watch my son learn. It’s really astounding how quickly they pick up new things and how much they really pay attention to and observe.

I’ve recently read two books about toddler parenting, Oh Crap I Have a Toddler and Hunt, Gather Parent and ever since we have had a much nicer time! He’s being absolutely delightful and tantrums and power struggles are resolved so much more quickly, efficiently and calmly. 100% recommend! I saw an instant improvement after reading just one chapter of Oh Crap, it was honestly magic 🤯

We potty trained in September and I’m glad we did! Life without nappies is much better! Most kids are ready to potty train earlier, from like 18 months. All it means is they’re capable of learning the skill, not that it won’t require effort or have any resistance. And I’ve also read that in many ways it’s easier if done earlier, before they’re full on threenagers with all the defiance and opinions.

Then on the not so fun side he twisted his leg yesterday running to kick a football in our garden, we suspected toddler’s fracture and spent 6 hours on a trip to A&E 😩 The A&E doc saw something suspicious on his xray but the consultant she called didn’t think it was a fracture because it wasn’t visible on the other image at another angle, but we have another appointment tomorrow with the trauma unit. I’m still not convinced it isn’t one, since he still doesn’t want to put weight on the leg unless fully medicated with calpol and Nurofen, and having spent significant time on Google reading up on it, it’s not always very obvious on an xray and may not show up at different angles.

I'm sorry to hear about your boy @GinnyBee and hope his leg improves and it's nothing serious, they sometimes don't realise how fragile they are. Leos nursery app is just filled with accident reports at nursery.
@aNewYorkerInLondon We didn't do potty training at 2 (when I wanted to) as my HV said there's not much point until he can say the word and associate it with the feeling. He has strong opinions now but he is getting more understanding when he's doing a poo he does go into the bathroom just hasn't connected the dots fully.

He's a big boy so I think we will skip potty and go straight to toilet as I got him a potty a year ago and he's to big for it. (We're in 3-4 clothes all ready and he's same height as my friends 4 year old)
I'll give those books a read prob will look for an audio book version to listen to on nursery runs. X

Hi Kittycaz,

We’re in a similar situation. Actually just opened mumsnet to see if I could find useful tips. We tried potty training last summer for the first time, hoping the warm weather would help, but she wasn’t quite ready and had a big freak out the fist time she saw a poo in the potty, which lead to a flat out refusal to even go near it. Fast forward to now and since Thursday she has been asking to wear big girl pants (most kids at nursery are potty training) and has been happily sitting on the potty at home and had a few tries at nursery. It looked promising, but yesterday she did a poo on the potty and had a few accidents with wee, which made her very nervous again. She has sat on the potty since, we try to prompt her to have regular tries, but it’s clear that she’s purposefully holding it in, and avoiding doing anything in there. We have tried all you can imagine, reading, drawing, even brought out the play dough that is only used for travelling to make potty time more entertaining, but she does not want to sit for long, and has since yesterday not done anything in there. I am now questioning if we should push through and keep trying, and risk creating a block like the last time, or stop and give her more time. She loves her big girl pants and is so proud of them, but struggles with the potty itself. Btw, the actual toilet seat is also a big no no, she says that is mummy’s/daddy’s potty and not hers. Any advise would be welcomed, we’re a bit deflated here.

@WildButterfly , we used the method from the book, “Oh Crap! Potty Training.” It worked really well for us, but it’s definitely an all-in, no more nappies (except sleep) type of commitment. People seem to love it or hate it. The author is a little gruff and is not shy in her opinions, but her insight into the potty training toddler’s mind and common fears was so helpful.

For us, days 1&2 were fun and exciting, days 3&4 were spent in mourning for our lost nappies, then day 5 it all clicked. I took off the whole first week and did nothing but focus on this one thing. It was actually a really lovely bonding experience, just us two. (His daddy was at work — we decided it would help with consistency in that first week if one parent took the lead.)

Crucially, nursery was happy to continue with the same methods and terminology we’d been using, so he had a smooth transition back into nursery for week 2. They said that the week we’d spent seemed to give him a really solid foundation.

Thank you, @aNewYorkerInLondon . I have read the book, the struggle for us is that our DD gets really distressed (like we’ve never seen) when she has an accident, which are bound to happen. She just had one a few minutes ago and was crying and begging to put a nappy on again, although she loves the big girls princess pants, and we calmly reenforced that it was absolutely fine. Then when we put the nappy on she asks to take them off after a few minutes. I have an older DD from a previous relationship and she was potty trained before 2, it was all so smooth. She loved seeing her wee in the potty and was always very happy and keen to try again, so I was kinda expecting the same results. Just goes to show how each kid is different. We’ll carry on trying. Thank you!