Due July 2022 (thread 4)

[CaptainCarp]

Hi all another new thread as the old 1 was almost full!

Previous thread
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/4445441-Due-July-2022-thread-3?pg=1

Hi lovelies! How is everyone doing this wonderful sunny week? Hope the weather is beautiful where you are, here in London it’s been such a treat! Puts me in a totally different mindset! 😌

I’m 21 weeks today and just came back from my 20 week scan - and everything looks great / normal and baby girl is bang on average! I cannot describe the relief and happiness to have this done and behind me. I’ve been low key dreading it since about 12 weeks so feels wonderful to know our little peanut is doing well in there! The sonographer was lovely too and really reassuring, kept saying “this looks good!” Or “I’m happy with that!”, which put us right at ease too! We finished the scan, she said she’s managed to do all the checks, and everything was looking good.
HOWEVER
When I got home and opened the folder to check the report, I noticed where they plot the measures on those little diagrams that 1 was borderline on the low curve and 1 was a tad below the lower curve - both were to do with “Urinary Artery”, one was Left and one Right. Now, no one mentioned anything at the scan or in the notes re follow ups, etc. but I was just wondering if anyone knows why that might be or what it is, or if you’ve had the same?
I guess I shouldn’t worry if no one mentioned anything, and I know if there was something to worry about they would have told us/arranged some sort of a follow up. But my little anxious mind is going into overdrive.
Would appreciate any insight or reassurance! ❤️

That should say UTERINE artery. Ugh. My brain is fried.

@Danani I’m glad your scan went well! I’m not sure on the low readings but when I had my 20 week scan last month it showed my right uterine artery on the high side over the plot which puts me at higher risk for a small baby and pre eclampsia which I’m at risk for anyway due to having it in my first pregnancy. My left side is fine but she did tell me at the scan it was high so having growth scans from 28 weeks and consultant care which I was already under anyway x

Hi all!

Hope you're all well :)
Been trying to get ready for baby and buy bits each week now so I don't have to spend a lump sum at once. With swaddling/sleeping bags is anyone going to be using these from birth? I'm second guessing myself if they can be used from birth now as I read somewhere they shouldn't be used until baby is 8lb 8 which my baby probably won't be for a while as my DD was 5lb 7 oz.

My baby boy is breech and kicking away! He is very active in the evenings so I'm sure he isn't going to be a great sleeper :') My body keeps waking me up for a wee in the night them I cannot get back to sleep so I feel like that my body is starting to prepare me for the long nights haha.

@AppleTree16 aww yes it's cute when it's someone close to you! I have a young nephew who insists on saying hello and goodbye to bump every time I see them. Absolutely melts me.

@Mumof2tobe it was similar for me, a colleague who I get on with but don't work closely with, and the phrasing was "you look so cute" so I'm not complaining, taking compliments wherever I can get them these days 😂 just never considered how strange of a thing to do it is.

@Danani I don't seem to even have a uterine artery measurement in my report if I were you I would call the midwife and ask, can't hurt to ask and might put your mind at ease!

Hi everyone

Sorry if this is the wrong place to post but I have a mat pay question (smp) for anyone that can help

Due date is 26th July so I would like to leave 4 wks before ideally - I did that before and it worked well - so around 26th when I told my line manager he said ' oh well just work until 30th as its earlier for payroll' I didn't say anything because who knows what will happen by then and I may want to leave earlier so thought I'd let that go - surely it's up to me when I leave not easier for payroll ?

Anyway today he started talking to the other manager out loud loosely in the office saying I can't take all my leave this year as 1/ policy is you can't take more than 2 wks at a time so taking all my leave I will accrue this year isn't an option and 2/ I can't carry any leave over ?!
So surely I'm left with not being able to use all my leave unless I start taking some between now and leave date and I'm already 22 wks

Do I need to get some advice here ?

They are very nice but let's just say my managers are all men, (3) are a very small office with no HR dept and haven't had a pregnant person

Oh and get this which didn't bother me until today and really thinking about it

He mentioned kit days (keeping in touch) which initially I thought ok no worries - I had them before when I had my daughter 10 yrs ago and he is now saying I can have up to 10 talking about once a month coming into the office for team meetings and updates then asking if he would like him to email me and weekly updates when they've had their team meetings ! This was asked the other day but after this conversation today I'm left confused

Can anyone help?

I don't want to sound ungrateful and I do want to go back, I really like my job but I think he may have the wrong expectation?!

X

@strawberrysummer19 I gave in my maternity form today as il be 25 weeks on Friday. I’m due the 8th of July and have decided to work till the 24th of June so my maternity will start on the 27th of June 12 days before baby is due unless I go early.

My employer had no issues with the date I put as you can go 11 weeks before baby is due anyway. I think it completely up to you when you want to start your leave.

I can’t help on the leave front as I work in a school so have all the half terms etc off but I would think you could start taking some time off here and there. How much leave do you have?

KIT days are optional and you can’t be penalised for not doing so and you can have up to 10 fully paid KIT days but need to be agreed with the manager that’s how it works in my work place and I think in terms of replying to emails etc it’s up to you.

Hope this helps a bit and hope you get everything sorted x

@AppleTree16 @KizboBaggins @Mumof2tobe I hate people in my personal space, so uninvited bump touches will not be well received by me! Anyone that knows me should know that too!
@Danani @Fizzybubblegumbottles @KizboBaggins I don't have those measurements either? The only charts I have are for head, belly and femur on my notes. She definitely was looking at other this and taking pictures of them but there's nothing on my notes to do with any of it. 🤷‍♀️
@strawberrysummer19 I would ignore the payroll comment and just give them a date of when you want to leave. That's not your problem. KIT days are optional so that's up to you, but you should get paid for those and it might help bump your money up? As for leave, you accrue it when you are off and as far as I'm aware they can't stop you from taking it or carrying it over? But you could tag 2 weeks leave on in front of your maternity leave, so your maternity kicks in officially 2 weeks before your DD, but you take 2 before that as leave, so that you are still off 4 weeks? I'm planning on using my leave before and after to stretch it out. But luckily I work for reasonable people. You could do with finding someone clued up on this stuff so you know your rights.

@Danani glad your scan went well! I think if it was anything to be concerned about they would have told you, but could be worth asking your midwife just to ease your mind?

@Mads96 I’m interested to know this too! I did a free antenatal class and I’m sure they said in that that swaddling with arms in isn’t considered safe sleeping. I might have got that wrong. Im planing on using either a blanket when she is born or a sleeping bag if they are suitable.

@strawberrysummer19 you should be entitled to all of your annual leave for the year! I’ve been told at my work I will have my full entitlement and I can also carry some over if I wish. I’m asking if I can take 4 weeks leave before I start my maternity leave so hoping to hear back about that this week. I believe your work have to arrange with you how you wish to be contacted. I personally wouldn’t want to be sent the notes from the team meetings every week. I’m going to keep my KIT days for towards the end of my maternity leave when I’m not getting any maternity pay 😅 do you have a HR department you can speak to to get more clarity?

Oh also forgot, why I came here to post to begin with. Someone at my partners work asked him if he’d brought our pram into the house yet (we have only just purchased it so it hasn’t arrived yet) and it got us talking about the old tale thing of how you shouldn’t bring the pram into the house before the baby. I’m a bit hit and miss with superstitions and was just going to ignore this one, but what’s everyone’s opinion?

@paintfairy I had a Uterine Artery Doppler at my 20 week scan cos of previous eclampsia and I’m a high risk pregnancy.

@Coco9910 with my 2nd pregnancy I didn’t pick up my buggy till about 35 weeks as I paid off for it in a shop. This time around I have already got my buggy but it’s at my sisters due to space but will probs have it here by about 35 weeks too earlier if needed.

@Coco9910 with DD we had the pram in the house by the time I was about 14 weeks pregnant and everything was fine!

@strawberrysummer19 you can definitely take your annual leave and carry it over anything you have left. You will also accrue leave whilst you are on mat leave (including bank holidays if you would usually have them off as paid)

You can also start your mat leave whenever YOU want as long as your due in the next 11 weeks.

Might be worth speaking to ACAS as your work sound particularly clueless about the laws around maternity leave! You should be able to phone them and they can point you in the direction of some resources.

This is from the citizens advice website re holiday

@strawberrysummer19 When you take your maternity leave is completely up to yourself & nobody can tell you otherwise. The only exception to this is if you're off sick, your work can put you on maternity leave - or at least that's how it works in Scotland according to the government website.
You're absolutely entitled to take as much or as little annual leave as you like & it should automatically be carried over to the next year and you'll still accrue holidays also.

I put in for 2 weeks of annual leave at the start of June and then I start my maternity midway through June but I've also taken two weeks off at the end of May as I don't feel I'm going to manage my job when I'm that heavily pregnant but wanted to save my maternity for the other end so I have as much time with baby as possible.

Do you have a union you can go speak to about your maternity? Sounds like you could definitely use someone in your corner that knows what the law states and can tell your work this :)

@Porridgeislife @Coco9910 thanks for your replies! Went to the midwives and heard baby girls heartbeat and she kicked the Doppler!! Xx

25 weeks today! Scary to think the 3rd trimester is fast approaching & before I know it, baby girl will be here with me 🥺❤️

How's everyone getting on? I'm still getting sickness & nausea🤦🏻‍♀️😂 Just accepted this is my reality until she's here, thankfully I have medication that helps meaning I can actually eat now 😂

@strawberrysummer19

It is totally up to you when you leave for YOUR maternity. Just cos it's more convenient for the company makes 0 difference. You can take your maternity leave up to 11 weeks before the baby's EDD but of course no later from when you have the baby as it starts automatically.

Also very unprofessional to speak out loudly about maternity if this is something you've spoken to him about in confidence.

I am pretty sure you can carry over leave you accrue during maternity leave as that is your entitlement as an employee. I also believe you can use your annual leave to extend your maternity if you can't afford to go without any pay.

Have you got a maternity policy pack that you can review?

Are you in public or private sector?

They are very nice but let's just say my managers are all men, (3) are a very small office with no HR dept and haven't had a pregnant person

Oh and get this which didn't bother me until today and really thinking about it

He mentioned kit days (keeping in touch) which initially I thought ok no worries - I had them before when I had my daughter 10 yrs ago and he is now saying I can have up to 10 talking about once a month coming into the office for team meetings and updates then asking if he would like him to email me and weekly updates when they've had their team meetings ! This was asked the other day but after this conversation today I'm left confused

@strawberrysummer19 sorry I copied and pasted your question in my reply so I could respond to it but then I didn't delete it before positing! Xx

@Lianna93 ahhh how exciting! Does 3rd trimester start from 27 weeks? Sorry to hear you're still suffering from sickness and nausea! It's horrible isn't it.

Have you started her nursery?

I'm 25 weeks on Friday! Xx

@Capricorn8990 thank you. I agree and thought I was in the right but I just want this all nipped in the bud.

So i would ideally like to use my annual leave for this year prior to going on leave and then next year I'll use some of what I have accrued so I can't see the issue - they just really do not know
There's no policy or hr and they use an outside company for payroll

X

@Capricorn8990 Yeah 27 weeks onwards is the 3rd trimester 😬 Honestly feel likes it's flown by! 😂

Unfortunately no nursery started yet - we have a friend that's been living with us since 2020 & we're still waiting on them moving out 🙃 They've been told they've got until baby is 6 months but I'm honestly so desperate to get into the room & decorate it 😩
Have you started yours?

I can't believe 27 wks is the 3rd trimester !
I'm 22 wks today and feel like it's going to go fast now

Dispute having such a bad lower back ache, bump ache today and rib pain! So not looking forward to feeling even more uncomfortable than I already do! I feel like my bump has just ballooned all of a sudden and everyone has mentioned how big bump has got! I don't mind at all but I do feel like she's really popping out ! X

@Capricorn8990 same thing happened to me baby kicked the Doppler! X