Due July 2022 (thread 4)

[CaptainCarp]

Hi all another new thread as the old 1 was almost full!

Previous thread
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/4445441-Due-July-2022-thread-3?pg=1

We’ve done ok on the buying front, slowly but surely. Got the pram / travel set, crib (needs to be built first though, ha!), Moses basket, Isofix and car seat, baby bouncer….

And lots of gorgeous little outfits which I’m buying in sizes 6m plus, in order to convince DH that really I’m saving money in the long term…

Still trying to decide though on a baby nest / something for napping downstairs during the day or just bringing the Moses basket down… and maybe a baby gym with little play mat for tummy time….

@HotToddyColdSauvignon wow you're super prepared! But what is "tummy time"...? Am I being thick?

@KizboBaggins tummy time is when you put the baby on their front to help build up their muscles. Time when they’re on their front on your chest counts as well, not just on the floor.
Some babies quite like it, some scream and scream (mine did every time I put her on the floor so we don’t really do it) she basically lived in my arms though so had plenty of practice holding her head up.
I think it started to be recommended around the same time as it was recommended to put them on their backs to sleep rather than their tummy (my mum had never heard of it)

Well i had the second attempt at a 20 week scan today, I had the same bloody miserable sonographer as last time 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ still completely lacking in people skills! Managed to get everything though and all looks ok, doctor checked all measurements and signed off as all ok.. even managed to get a nice picture of little miss!

Got my poorly pup home aswell, he's still so zonked out from the GA it's like having a different dog 😭 he's breaking my heart.. dread to think what I'll be like if baby is ever poorly

@SamanthaVimes oooh I see! I did not know that was a thing... Clearly I am in no way prepared to raise a child 😅 is it a "from birth" thing or a bit later? I'll google it anyway, thank you

I'm hoping I'll figure this kind of stuff out when he's here... like what to actually do all day with a newborn

@KizboBaggins you and me both. 🤣🤣🤣
@Danani I get weird pains too. I've been getting one where the left side of my stomach goes hard and hurts? You never know what is normal? I also get strange pains really low down.

To be fair @KizboBaggins I only know about it from hearing other friends who’ve had babies witter on about it

Love the idea it makes me sound all knowledgable and wise though

And as for what to do with a newborn….

They sleep for 18 hours + a day don’t they?

I was planning to read books and cook wildly exotic dinners

Going to be gutted if that’s not how my maternity leave pans out

So sorry to hear you’ve been having such bad experiences with the sonographer @ChinChilly, that’s really not fair to you

@ChinChilly glad the scan went well! My sonographer was a bit like that. Made me feel stupid and guilty for asking questions. I said "so is he still due on the same date?" And she said "obviously because his measurements are average" 🙄

Sorry about your pup too, mine was the same after his neuter but back to business the next day. Hope his wound heals quickly, poor boy.

@HotToddyColdSauvignon same ... I assumed maternity leave would be the perfect time to explore my newfound interest in obscure coin collections and learn how to do the splits. I'll be putting in a written complaint to my DH for impregnating me if these hobbies do not come to fruition.

@HotToddyColdSauvignon I know my heart sank when he called my name 🙄 I like your plans for maternity leave, I'm hoping mine will be the same although I'm thinking not 🤣

@KizboBaggins it's so annoying isnt it, I don't understand why go into that role if you're going to be a misery... Maybe its NHS pressures but still pretty annoying.

"I assumed maternity leave would be the perfect time to explore my newfound interest in obscure coin collections and learn how to do the splits. I'll be putting in a written complaint to my DH for impregnating me if these hobbies do not come to fruition."

Hilarious, lol. Although I am hoping for at least a bit of time to catch up with some Netflix/ Xbox!!

Haha I wrote a list when I was pregnant with my first of things that I’d do when I was on mat leave. Every single thing on it remains undone

@paintfairy I've just had one of those
My left side went hard and sore for a few moments and then softened again
I've been feeling so much bigger and more little movements today x

@HotToddyColdSauvignon I actually did read loads on both my previous maternity leaves! Kindle paperwhite and audible subscriptions were my best things... Kindle for night feeds and long buggy walks with headphones listening to audiobooks and podcasts!

Second time round I also fully embraced snuggling on the sofa and in bed for cluster feeds with lots of Netflix too. Not sure I will have much ambition beyond this though!

@missv556 I think there was some research that showed most adults in the UK have low vitamin D so I wouldn't worry! I just take a boots own vit d supplement with breakfast. The baby will also take everything it needs from you, so you might have low levels but I'm sure the baby is just fine!

@Effram that gives me hope for maternity leave! I have no problem embracing sofa snuggles and Netflix lol

For those of you that have done this before, what was your night time set up like?

I plan on breastfeeding, so I'm wondering about things like - having baby right next to me, a low lamp I can switch on, those rag things to wipe anything up, nappies nearby just in case... am I missing anything? Trying to visualise how it would work and plan ahead... how long do feeds take generally? Or does it completely depend?

I think it's just starting to dawn on me that this is actually happening 😂

@KizboBaggins I had a low lamp (we actually had a colour change one so I would set it on a red light) and a massive bottle of water as breastfeeding made me so thirsty in the early days plus a twix or something in case I needed a late night boost!
Nappy change stuff in the same room so that I could change any poo nappies, although after a little while they don’t poo at night which is better as the nappy change would always wake up DD more so I was happy to ditch it!

Length of feeds completely depends, sometimes it would be a quick 5/10 min feed and she’d go back down easily. Sometimes it would be cluster feeding and you’d be there for hours! Books on audible were my friend for keeping me awake whilst feeding although once I cracked side lying feeding and safe bedsharing you can have a little doze and get some more rest. It took me a while to even realise it was a thing though so not sure how easy it would be with a really little baby but I’ll definitely be trying it earlier than I did last time (especially considering it will be summer so not much of an issue to go without covers)

If anyone is interested in bedsharing the lullaby trust have info on how to make it as safe as possible, it’s much safer to plan to do it than to accidentally fall asleep in an unsafe position (which I definitely did accidentally before I knew about intentional bedsharing and I was so so lucky nothing bad happened)

@SamanthaVimes that's really helpful thanks, I was thinking about night feeds but somehow it hadn't occurred to me nappy changes etc might also be required! I really need to start thinking about how I want my rooms laid out!

Just had a midwife appointment and got to hear the baby's heartbeat for the first time, that was nearly as exciting as seeing them on screen! All still seems to be going well, glucose test at the next appointment though

I would say if anyone is in a house rather than a flat get 2 change mats. We recently bought another one for downstairs as I didn’t think I’d be up for traipsing up the stairs with new baby and DD but it’s already been really useful with just DD and now I think we were mad to only have had one all this time!

@SamanthaVimes I had a sidecar cot (next2me) but mainly co-slept, so my evenings would be to get comfy on the sofa and watch something with my husband - we would take it in turns to eat dinner and I would feed the baby or he would put baby in the sling. then I would go to bed - if baby was asleep on my husband he'd keep him there as he would stay up later than me, I'd go and get some sleep! or if baby was up, I would take baby with me. I would always take a tray of essentials... bottle of water, iPad, maybe some snacks for me esp at the beginning, nipple cream, kindle... I would get comfy in bed and usually watch something else or read then when I was ready to sleep I would lie down and sidelie feed, and then we would both go to sleep. Some nights we would sleep all night like that, other nights sometimes we would sit up and do a full feed sitting up then lie down again to go back to sleep. I would keep nappies/wipes/change of baby clothes/mat/muslins in the bedside crib (extended bedside table) and change there in bed when he still needed a night change.

I have a SAD lamp radio that you can fade up and down which was great as meant I could put it on just enough to see to change without having to wake us both up too much, and then a kindle paperwhite was great for one handed reading! I also listened to a lot of audio books through the sit up feeds!

But yeah, big fan of bedsharing/co-sleeping when breastfeeding. It just meant the nights felt calm and easy and I didn't have to get up and get cold, I really maximised the amount of sleep I got! I would have a try once rule so if we had done a sit up feed and he'd fallen asleep feeding I would try and transfer to the crib - but if he then didn't settle I just brought him straight in next to me for sidelying feed and we would sleep together like that. Hot water bottle in the crib while feeding so when I put him down it wasn't a cold shock usually helped but I really just embraced the co sleeping and over time he did longer and longer stints in the crib on his own!

Oops sorry I meant to tag @KizboBaggins !

Just to add with my second especially I loved our nights and night feeds as it felt like such special peaceful bonding time with him, as the toddler was around in the day. Night time was my quality time with the baby!

So…. Anyone who has had a baby before…

Do we actually need a baby nest? I’m trying to persuade DH that we do, but I can’t seem to articulate why….

I think it’s because during the day, when they don’t want to go in their bouncer chair thingy, I need somewhere to put them down, that’s not just “the floor”

But he says what’s wrong with a blanket / back in its Moses basket upstairs / bring the Moses basket down during the day… all good arguments I guess?!

@HotToddyColdSauvignon we had a purflo nest with DD that we managed to get for £25 in a mothercare closing down sale. I’d say we probably did get £25 worth of use out of it but not much more (we didn’t have a Moses basket at all though) I wouldn’t recommend spending sleepyhead money to anyone.
The cat has claimed it as his now so I don’t think we’ll be able to use it for DS

We found the play gym mat thing a lot more useful as it dangled toys over DDs face which kept her happier for a bit longer.

Interesting @SamanthaVimes so DH may actually be right about it….

Dammit