Pregnancy after miscarriage - thread 2

[susiebluebell]

Hi! Thought I'd start a new thread as we filled up the previous one. Going to try and tag everyone who's been active recently - apologies if I miss anyone out! Feel free to join in.

I'm expecting my firstborn, having had 2 miscarriages. Currently 17 weeks and 2 days!

@Loulou237
@thunderonlyhappenswhenits
@OnceUponAThread
@Hopingforarainbow27
@chasingtherainbow1
@GinnyBee
@Tandabear
@CocoLoco88
@itssquidstella
@Oti22

@susiebluebell thank you. I feel stronger third time round, you just get used to it ☹️ I just wish I knew the cause

@Hopingforarainbow27 - I'm so so so sorry. Sending you so much strength. I really hope you get some answers. X

Hi ladies! I lost you for a while with the new thread and have been busy too. I'm actually 32 weeks tomorrow, I can't quite believe it! I've finally shifted from fear of losing this one to believing we will have a real, live baby. I still get moments of anxiety if I don't feel him move for a while, but when I sit still long enough I can make out movement again and take a deep breath. Also in my due date group there have been a few preemies now, so that's another worry that I'll just suddenly go into labour any day now 😟

@Hopingforarainbow27 I'm so sorry to read your news :( that really sucks. 💔 Hopefully you'll get some answers and have a better outcome next time. I had some basic tests done after my second miscarriage and although it all came back normal, I was given a prescription for progesterone and off my own research also started taking low dose aspirin. Did you have either this time? I think it could be worth asking about. I've also heard low iron stores aren't ideal when trying for a baby, but I guess if you don't have trouble getting pregnant then that's probably unlikely to be affecting you.

@GinnyBee yes I was on progesterone and aspirin. ☹️

Hi

I am new these sort of threads because it's taken me a while to talk about it without crying or feeling like I can't talk about it because the hospital practically just didn't give any follow up support.

After trying ttc for a while we eventually conceived in the July '21 but october '21 we suffered our 1st miscarriage, the pregancy itself was 11 weeks but the heart stopped beating at 6/7 weeks, as strange as it sounds by chance I was able to save the embryo and bury it which gave some closure but put a pause on ttc again.

So after deciding to ttc again March '22 we've actually conceived 1st time and I have had faint positive results, although because they are only faint every time with the early tests and I'm past my AF date by 3 days, I know it's still only early but I'm preparing for the worst and hoping for the best.

I can't shift the fear that it will happen again because I have no symptoms what so ever and all I have is faint lines.

I understand we can't do anything to prevent and we have to be patient but it's such a long and scary wait. How do we try to stay positive when it's in the back of the mind? 😓

@Hopingforarainbow27
I am new to here but I am so sorry and sending love. I hope you will eventually find the answers your looking for and have all the support you need x

@Hopingforarainbow27 That's awful, I'm so sorry again. It's so unfair that after you've done everything right and even have extra help from medication to prevent it this still happens.

I just hate the unknown if I will ever have a baby. I will never enjoy being pregnant like most people

@Flowerstem I think it's really difficult to not be scared. Have you got any early scans booked? It may help to give a bit of reassurance for at least a bit. I keep trying to tell myself to not worry as I can't control what happens - but that doesn't seem to help. I just end up googling too much.

@Hopingforarainbow27 I'm so sorry. Have you had any tests done to check why it may be happening?

@Overlyanxious I had the tests done through nhs after the second one and all bloods were normal

@Overlyanxious
Unfortunately no, we had early scans with our lost pregnancy and we saw the heartbeat but obviously soon after it stopped so we said we wouldn't do early scans again as it hurt more seeing, if that makes sense.
We have this morning we will take it day by day and hopefully it's a sticky bean, if I don't have any symptoms of bleeding we may book one in a weeks

@Hopingforarainbow27 so sorry for your loss. If you can afford it, it might be worth getting tests done privately, as there are some which aren't routinely offered on the NHS. I had a much more comprehensive blood screen privately, and DH and I both had karyotype testing, which I don't think the NHS does.

@Flowerstem that makes sense. I'm having an 8 week scan next week and I know if it's ok I'll probably only be happy for that day and will be back to worrying again.

@Flowerstem hello and welcome. Sorry to read about your loss As difficult as it is, in those early days it's mostly waiting and seeing. I've had two (known) miscarriages and I know what the anxiety of a new pregnancy is like.

If you think it might help, you could look up miscarriage statistics. That really helped me. Even at the early stages, the odds are more in favour of the pregnancy being successful than unsuccessful! And as the weeks go on, the stats just get better and better.

I can understand that going for an early scan again might be really hard. We did have an early scan for this pregnancy but other than that, we sort of acted like the pregnancy wasn't 'real' until the 12-week scan. Actually real isn't the right word (especially as I was feeling v ill!), more like we acted like it wasn't a done deal until much later. So we talked in terms of 'If everything goes well' etc...

Really hope you can find the support you're looking for. The ladies on here are great x

@susiebluebell

Thankyou Ladies for the warm welcome and it's so nice to know theres support, I wish I googled threads earlier last year as it seems such a taboo subject and I can't bring it up with family or friends as they seem uncomfortable.

Atm no one knows about this hopeful pregnancy yet so I think we will wait until the 12 week mark, that seems like a manable way of not worrying too much, thankyou I love the way you've mentioned .... 'if everything goes well' x

@OnceUponAThread just an update on DD. She was booked in for surgical procedure but started to miscarry the day before. Lost a lot of blood and in so much pain had to go to hosp. Tissue removed by a doctor. Rescanned following morning, products as they called them (which I was totally shocked at!) still there so had to have surgical procedure anyways. Has now been in hospital 48 hrs waiting for this!! Keep being nil by mouth and then run out of time. She has been nil by mouth 34 hrs out of the 48 hrs she has been there. As if a miscarriage isn’t hard enough on a woman.

I had early scans in all my pregnancies. First one we had it at 7+3 but baby was measuring 5+6 with a flickering heartbeat which was the first thing that made me worried, although so many people have had good outcomes with measuring small that early. I just didn't feel comfortable, and then bleeding started at 10+0 and a scan showed an embryo the size of 6+5 so it had passed about a week after our scan. Second pregnancy we waited longer to book the scan and went in at 8+4 to find a missed miscarriage measuring around 8 weeks, so will have only just missed seeing everything be fine by a couple of days. As sad as it was, I was grateful to have had the scan so it could be dealt with promptly, as the first time it took my body 3 weeks to start miscarrying. Then with this pregnancy I was offered reassurance scans at EPU every 2 weeks, so had one at 6, 8 and 10 weeks before dating scan at 12 weeks. Each time I was so nervous! I only felt small relief after the 10 week scan as that meant I was past the point when I lost the previous pregnancies.

But even still it was probably only at the anomaly scan at 20 weeks when I finally started having more faith that he's sticking and growing well.

So in summary, whilst the early scans did very little to offer reassurance that the pregnancy is going well, I felt better about checking in regularly in case I miscarried again so I wouldn't be walking around for weeks with an embryo that no longer is alive. Quite morbid.

@GinnyBee so pleased your pregnancy is going good this time. Must be a huge relief to get past those points. Early scans are both stressful and reassuring at the same time aren’t they. The waiting in between scans when something isn’t just quite right is awful for ladies but I agree it’s better to know than get to 12 week scan and find out then. Just going through this with my DD.

Update from from my last post too 😓
Unfortunately we've had a chemical pregnancy so just waiting for it to stop now.
Fingers crossed next time round we will have sticky bean for our rainbow 🌈

@hftb I am so sorry your DD going through that, sending thoughts out to you at time

@Flowerstem aww so sorry to read this. It’s awful what ladies have to go through to have a baby to love. You take care xx

@Flowerstem Ugh that's rubbish, I'm so sorry. Hope you can take some time for yourself and decide what to do next xx Hugs

Thankyou,

If I'm honest I think I already knew because of the faint positives so it was already at the back of my mind.

I'm in the mind of everything happens for a reason and unfortunately my brother is going via IVF route because its come about that we do have a family gene that has some abnormalities so maybe that's it or its just not the right time.
If it keep recurring I will go back have more tests but I'm keeping postive and keep hoping we will get our rainbow baby eventually x

You will. It may not happen the way you expected, but you will xx

Hi ladies, how is everyone doing?
@susiebluebell did I miss your 20 week scan? Have you found out the gender?!
I’m 29+3 today is anyone else feeling like this time is flying?!
Please all send updates and how many weeks you all are

Evening @Loulou237 !

I'm 33+2 today and finished at my other job today 🥳 Two more weeks to go at the other one, and then I'm fully off!

Time is going ridiculously fast now! I'm so ready to not be pregnant anymore, but terrified of having a baby at the end of it 😬

Oh wow congratulations @GinnyBee that’s amazing, not long to go now! Also almost completely on maternity leave that must be exciting for you.

I’ve got a toddler and I think having a newborn is so much easier than being pregnant, apart from the lack of sleep obviously! It’s when they start growing up the hard bit starts
you’ll do brilliantly try not to worry! It’s the best feeling ever xx