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His mum hates the name I chose

110 replies

Tokyo21 · 28/11/2021 11:43

I’m having my first baby soon ish and have been so stuck on names for my son. I found so many that I like but don’t love if you know what I mean.
Until last week I was scrolling through a list and saw Mars. I felt like this one was the one. Maybe just as a middle name tho bcos I did want something longer as a first name but at the moment it’s all I’ve got.
I told my sons dad and he said he really liked it and even started referring to the baby as Mars. He asked me stuff like, ‘has Mars been kicking?’
Yesterday evening he went his mums house. I spoke to him after he left his mums and he said she hates the name Mars. He told me she said I should ‘come better’ that it’s ‘cruel’ because he will get picked on at school and other kids will call him Mars bar. My sons dad told me he agrees with her and wants me to keep looking at names.
This did make me sad. Because I never want to chose a name that would attract negative attention on my son but it also never crossed my mind that Mars was a name that would do that. I’m aware the name is a little out there but when I hear and see it I don’t automatically think chocolate! Mars is the planet of action and means God of War.
I feel like kids will be kids and can find a reason to pick on anything, it’s unavoidable, and I want to reach my son to have high self esteem and not be phased by it if this was to happen, or has she got a point am I being cruel to call him Mars?

OP posts:
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Catfox1 · 28/11/2021 11:45

This fat bastards mind automatically goes to chocolate sorry 🙈🐷

If you are happy though that’s the main thing!

trevthecat · 28/11/2021 11:47

I didn't instantly think of chocolate. It's a bit out there for me but I don't hate it.

Wisforwater · 28/11/2021 11:50

It’s not a name I would choose, but both my children have mainstream names and both of them have been teased for their names(including by their teacher). Children are cruel; pick Mars or pick Andrew and some other kids will think up a way to distort it. My DM didn’t like our choice of name, her response was ‘I’ll get used to it’ and she has.

Camembear · 28/11/2021 11:51

You said as a middle name right? I like it actually!

I don’t think it’s as “out there” as some of the names I’ve heard. To me it’s like using a nature name.

Bluntness100 · 28/11/2021 11:52

No I immediately thought of mars bars and one hundred percent your kid will get bullied for it. It’s not like he can wear a badge saying I’m not named after the chocolate bar, honest.

Camembear · 28/11/2021 11:52

Also the association with chocolate is not that bad. Of all the things to be associated with..

People will find something negative about any name you can think of.

FelicityBeedle · 28/11/2021 11:55

I mean it’s a good of war, I wouldn’t like it for that association alone. Fair enough for middle

Loyaultemelie · 28/11/2021 11:55

I immediately went to the Deity but that's because he's a protector of agriculture (farmers). We know a Freyja and a Lir so I don't think naming from the different pantheons is that unusual.

ButEmilylovedhim · 28/11/2021 11:55

What about Lars instead?

Bluntness100 · 28/11/2021 11:58

@Camembear

Also the association with chocolate is not that bad. Of all the things to be associated with..

People will find something negative about any name you can think of.

Well yes it could be worse, but who wants to be named after a cheap crap chocolate bar? What if the kid turns out to have weight issues? They will get bullied anyway, but it could be horrific.
strengthinnumber · 28/11/2021 11:59

It's unusual and it's likely he'll be teased for it. Also Mars was the God of War... it's quite a name to live up to if he perhaps turns out a bit geeky or liking baking.

An old work colleague from a non UK background was called Aphrodite and she's found it quite difficult as she's (in her own words) quite plain and she felt her name drew attention to this.

JosephineDeBeauharnais · 28/11/2021 12:00

XH worked with a guy called Mars, whose son was also Mars. They were American. I’ve always liked it since then, and it went well with their very ordinary surname.

user1493494961 · 28/11/2021 12:00

Why would you name your child after the God of War?

MiddleEasternMummy · 28/11/2021 12:02

Chocolate bar immediately but I love chocolate, don't love the name however .
If your husband has changed his mind you'll have to read think .
Also don't blame mil she was saying how she felt and Ali if others I suspect.

notacooldad · 28/11/2021 12:03

I can see why OP tbh.

MiddleEasternMummy · 28/11/2021 12:03

Bloody phone keeps changing words 😳

Viviennemary · 28/11/2021 12:04

Its dire. He will get called Mars Bar.

Tokyo21 · 28/11/2021 12:04

Thanks for everyone’s comments I appreciate the insight.
Just wanted to clarify, I don’t like the name because of its association with war. At the time I saw it I never knew this. I was just pointing out that it has other associations than chocolate, I like the name bcos I like how it sounds and looks not bcos of it meaning God of War or chocolate!

OP posts:
Comedycook · 28/11/2021 12:05

It's quite cool as a middle name...most kids don't even know what their friends middle names are. Anyway, it's none of your mils business

MiddleEasternMummy · 28/11/2021 12:05

@ButEmilylovedhim

What about Lars instead?
Worse than Mars imho. Unless your Scandinavian.
NynaeveSedai · 28/11/2021 12:05

YABU
Usually I'd say don't tell people the name before the baby is born but in this case don't do it, it's awful

MassiveHoard · 28/11/2021 12:05

Don't share your choices before the baby is if you don't want dissent. Its up to you and your DH what you call your child.
FWIW I don't like Mars, but I'm a random stranger so it doesn't really matter does it? What matters is what you choose.

MatildaIThink · 28/11/2021 12:05

@user1493494961

Why would you name your child after the God of War?
Which one though? Across all of the panthenons there are many gods of war, some are aggressive, others just look after the souls souls dead warriors, Mars, Ares or Tyr were not particularly violent, especially for the time their respective religions were in existence, also many elements of the gods of war are present in the Abrahamic god.
Appiandterri · 28/11/2021 12:07

Don’t tell people your baby name before baby is here.
Everyone will have an opinion and someone is bound to spoil it for you.
It’s harder to be critical of a name once it’s given to a gorgeous new baby.

EnrouteNOTonroute · 28/11/2021 12:07

It never crossed your mind that he would be called mars bar??? The most famous chocolate bar there is?
Sorry OP, but Mars as a name will invite name calling from kids

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