June 2021 - part 6 - the final push!

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We’re coming to the end of our last thread so here is, hopefully, the final instalment of our journeys. I’m going to compile a list of due dates and births from the last thread and I’ll post them below.

Hopefully we’ll have lots more baby announcements on the way! How is everyone doing?

@Lovethatjourneyforme sorry your having a difficult time with feeding. How old is your LO now?

My DH will sometimes take DS for a walk in his pram without me so that I get an hour or so to myself, it’s bliss and really helps me to have some me time. Baby is happy as he just sleeps in the pram.

I’ve also found it helpful to hold him facing outwards, if he’s awake and has just had a good feed. I think if he’s ever awake and his face is against someone he’ll want to feed whether he’s hungry or not. So facing him the other way so he can just have a look around has been a handy trick.

@Lovethatjourneyforme I am 100% with you!!!! I was loosing my sanity a bit as I also have a 4 yr old and I just want to play with her and just be with her! I don’t enjoy it either, I find I can sometimes dread the next one thinking ‘oh god again’ I know it gets easier but I’m just day 12 here 😩😩😩 I made it to 14 days with the last one and then started expressed, followed by formula. We have started a bottle around 9pm of expressed and my god to get into bed and know i had a couple of hours was amazing!

How old is yours now?

I’m debating combi feeding for 3 reasons;

1. So she’ll take a bottle and either expressed or formula for others
2. So I can be with my 4 yr old sometimes
3. So I know she’ll take a bottle eventually

I know this sounds so stupid but my baby when he is awake is so alert sitting looking around - what are you doing with them at that stage ? Are yous putting them on a mat or a little chair? I have both but he seems so little for them but I fear he's bored

Ha ha xxx

@MelissaAnn92 I literally had the same thought this morn!!!! She was wide awake and I put her in her caccoonababy and I just felt so guilty like she must be bored 😂

@MelissaAnn92 DS is 19 days old and we have a swingy chair that he’ll be happy in when he’s in a looking around mood. And we’ve put him on a mat as he can see more than in his Moses basket because it doesn’t have sides. We also just walk around with him ‘let’s see what daddy is doing in the kitchen’ etc 🤣

@PinkPlantCase she's 1 month today. My husbands already back at work and when he gets home she's already into her super fussy evening cluster feed (still a daily occurance, thought it would've lessened by now!) so he doesn't really get much opportunity to take her out.

We're already combi feeding. It definitely took the pressure off but still didn't make me actually enjoy BF any more. Plus she's more content and less refluxy on formula.

@AIRRRR did you have your baby on the 23rd? If so, snap!
No one has suggested formula top up yet but the plan we are on is simply not sustainable. The midwife said yesterday that they will continue to weigh until birthweight and with the speed she is putting on that could be 3/4 weeks of 48 hour weigh ins. It's all getting too much. I simply feed and pump around the clock and when my husband returns to work, not sure how I'll continue!
I've contacted a private lactation consultant to see if they can support.

@Firsttimeconcerns

I am getting so disheartened and frustrated with conflicting midwife messages!! My baby lost 10% of her birth weight which was 9lb 4oz. One midwife put us on feeding plan which was then contradicted by the second community midwife who came to see us. Current plan is regular breastfeeding sessions but providing a top up after each feed of expressed milk from a bottle. She is putting on weight but it's slow and we've been told that she will continue to be weighed until she makes it back up to 9lb 4!

My concerns/questions are:
1.we were told to bottle feed the expressed milk and now her suction on my boob seems to have lessened. Is this a thing? I have to hold my boob as otherwise she slips off the nipple.

1. She feeds from 10pm until 4am most nights... It's not proper sucking so I'm concerned that I'm not producing enough for her. Is this normal cluster feeding??
2. I am spending so much time expressing. I can only seem to get 2oz each time. When will this increase?
3. Is anyone had an alternative successful feeding plan? This is not sustainable and I am becoming so emotionl feeling like I'm failing her 😔

@Firsttimeconcerns sorry to hear your midwives are frustrating you with conflicting information. I think it's so mean to do that to you and I think you raise it with both of them because it's not fair to be put in such a confusing position. Tell your midwives how you're feeling!

How old is your baby?

You are not failing her! Bf is hard!

Do you have a pregnancy advice line you can call? We have a county hotline number for pregnant and new mums where we can call and ask any question.

You could chat to the national breastfeeding helpline 0300 100 0212.

You could do a separate post on Mumsnet to get some opinions on your questions.

My 2 cents worth to your answers:
Rather than holding your boob can you support your baby's head so it's closer to the breast and baby is less likely to fall off. Is baby falling asleep do you think?

Tap into a breastfeeding drop in session to get some advice. Bf takes practice for both of you and it perhaps you both need a bit of support. There are a few weekly sessions near me so I hope there are some for you? Or demand to go back and see a lactation / breastfeeding specialist at your hospital.

Lots of night feeding is definitely normal as your milk is at its best then! This is when I was told to express first time round (not that I ever mustered the energy to do that!). I got my best volume of expressed milk with the first morning feed when I used a Haakaa pump on one boob while DS fed from the other. I got just as much milk from the H pump as I did with an electric one!

Let us know how you get on. Sending strength! You got this

@Lovethatjourneyforme I know feel the same on cluster feeding days, it’s horrible. I felt like my nipples were going to fall off yesterday and I was planning an early night but he fed from 6-12.30 and just kept pooing as well so he was unsettled then wanted to feed again. He’s 5 and a half weeks yet, I just keep telling myself of the benefits and that it’s temporary. Feel really guilty that I’m feeling like that when I know it benefits him. He’s only had breast milk, I’ve been expressing a bottle the last two weeks also to try sleep more.

Bought a dummy as well now he’s getting a bit older to try and stop him using me as one so we’ll see where I get with that.

Everyone keeps saying at 6 weeks it gets easier so let’s see…

@Whywontitname I’ve also introduced a dummy to give me just some mins in between the mad feedings!!!

@whywontitname it can be never ending can't it! She seems full and finishes, so I burp her, which makes more room so she's hungry again, then she poops, again seems to make more room so she's hungry again and we go on and on and on.... I know they say boobs are like a river and they just keep producing but after an hour they're definitely not producing milk fast enough to keep her happy 😂
I feel better after my rant anyway, thanks for responding ladies! Had a bad night's sleep and was just a bit fed up this morning.
And yep, everyone says it gets better at 6 weeks. So I'll be waiting for the stroke of midnight on that day to see if it magically becomes easier somehow haha. If it doesn't I'll be ordering formula by 00:15 😂

@Lovethatjourneyforme 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 The formula bit hahahahahahhaha so funny! You’re stronger than me! I don’t think I can wait that long!

@serenfach1 thank you so much for your reply. I really needed to read that ☺️

I feel much better this evening. I had my first h visitor visit today and spoke about how I was feeling. I've had 6 different community midwifes out to me now. My next visit is thursday and I plan n to request a longer period before next weigh in if they want another one. It has been putting too much pressure on us.

I contacted a lactation consultant today and had a face to face apt this afternoon. It was well worth the money and she has provided me with a more sustainable feeding plan, a more comfortable position, some special syringes rather than bottle and a letter to provide to the midwifes on Thursday.

I didn't know about that number. Thank you for your advice xx

My LO is cluster feeding day and night now and the last two days have been the hardest but I know it's perfectly normal , had my second dose of the vaccine today , I'm hoping I don't have bad side affects
🙈 so hard leaving her as she was not settled in the car at all and looking for the boob but had to be done.

@Lovethatjourneyforme we are having very similar experiences so I'll be counting down to 6 weeks also ! It's so tough and good to rant as it can be very isolating

I have to admit that i’ve succumbed to a dummy as i have a 4 yr old and cannot simply sit and feed all day ! I’ve also introduced a bottle of expressed around 9-11 so dad can feed and i can sleep at least a 3 yr block!

@AlRRRR no shame in a dummy, my one just won't take it 🙈 I've tried a few brands now so hoping she will eventually as she loves to just suckle on me for comfort which is fine but sore!

@TerryRose I had to put it in fast near the nipple and then put my face really near to her hahahah and say shsssshh and did this few times and it worked! Stopped the screaming when I need to keep the 4 yr old alive with love and food 🤣🤣🤣

How are yous all managing them rising rates of covid? Close family have met our baby but my
Friends are holding off. I live in the north east and out cases are rocketing. Tried to look into data to see how it would affect new borns if he were to contract it, it's all got me on edge.

@MelissaAnn92 Oooo I hadn’t looked at anything for a good while and I didn’t know they were going so high! I’ve just started letting people know they can meet baby 😩😩😩😩😩 I’ve got my 1st jab on Thurs next week too

@MelissaAnn92 family have all met DS now and like you we’re starting to introduce friends aswell. I think we’ll carry in meeting up with friends, outdoors where possible. So far everyone has done a LFT on the day of seeing us, we haven’t asked anyone to they’ve all offered.

We haven’t been in any pubs or restaurants though and have still avoided shops to an extent. We’re back in supermarkets and I did treat myself with a trip to a very empty next 🤣

At weekends we’ve been going for walks and to the grounds of national trust places. That’s what we tended to do pre covid and pre baby though anyway.

Anecdotally we know a few families with DC under 1 that have had covid at some point in the pandemic, before vaccines were around. Non of the babies got poorly but the bigger problem was the parents feeling ill and finding it harder to take care of DC.

In our house DH had one vaccine before DS was born so now has some immunity. I had mine about 2 weeks ago so will get the 60% immunity before the 19th. Hopefully some of the antibodies will have gone over in my milk to DS too!

Had my second dose of the Pfizer vaccine on Tuesday, was so anxious going in the car with baba as she's cluster feeding and didn't know how it would work. She cried for a little bit on the way but thankfully fell asleep by the time we got to the centre and I was only about half an hour and she didn't have a meltdown . I took a paracetamol about an hour before hand and twenty minutes after my vaccine as advised by my doctor and thankfully didn't get any side effects. Was so worried I would be feeling sick and didn't know how I would manage as already exhausted 😴 🤣
Haven't made it out for any walks or anything like that as she's literally feeding all day so can't wait til that settles and can finally use her pram 🤣

@Firsttimeconcerns how did it go today w the health visitor and how is the feeding plan going that the lactation consultant provided? So glad you were feeling better on Tuesday. Hope you're still feeling ok?

@AIRRRR how are you getting on with the bottle now?

@terryrose I had my first pfizer jab on Monday. I felt grotty, cold, shivery and generally ill on Monday night, it was horrible. Good to know we can take paracetamol to help minimise the effects of the second jab as I'm worried it's going to knock me for six!