Absolutely effing HATE being pregnant

[BertieBoo88]

There.. I said it. I'm sorry for people who long to be pregnant and don't want to sound ungrateful.
But I fucking HATE being pregnant. I'm only 14 weeks and I feel constantly on the brink of vomiting so I can't even go to Tesco without having a panic attack.. all I can do is lay in bed or on the sofa. 6 months sounds like a lifetime away. I feel like I'm on the worst rollercoaster and all I want to do is get off. How is this meant to be the most natural thing in the world!? What a joke. I think it's triggered some underlying depression and I just feel like my life has stopped. Everyone is going to work or living their lives the best they can in the circumstance and this pregnancy has put my life on pause. Seriously wondering if it's too late to do something about it to be honest.
Sorry I just needed a rant.

@BertieBoo88 I hear you. I cried on my OH yesterday because I feel like I just can’t take feeling this way anymore. I have the odd good day and think I must be out the other side and then the nausea and reflux seem to come back with a vengeance the next day. My house is usually so clean and tidy but I can’t even keep on top of the washing. I can’t find anything I’m able to eat or drink without feeling sick. I like you feel like my life is on hold until I get to that miracle 12 weeks. Well I’m 12 weeks today and feel no different. If anything it’s getting worse and I’ve woken up with a terrible headache. The guilt is hard to bear as well because we had IVF so I actually paid to feel this way! You are definitely not alone - do whatever is right for you and for your own mental health.

@BertieBoo88 it feels so lonely and isolating doesn't it! Especially as I don't actually know many other people my age who are pregnant or have been pregnant so I couldn't even speak to others about it, I totally thought it was just me too!
Oh it's rubbish that's all the midwife had to say, I wonder if your hospital maternity department might have a mental health section for pregnant women at all? Hopefully the medication starts to work for you!
I can understand that, it's such a hard decision because there's so many unknowns about how you will feel at different stages! I really do hope things ease for you soon!
Around 18/19 weeks I still felt sick daily but it wasn't constant, it was just 1st thing in the morning and then around the afternoon/evening but with some breaks in between. Then 20 weeks I felt so ill the day of my scan but that was probably nerves, the next day though I had no sickness at all. And now I've not had sickness in that level of extreme since! I've had an odd moment if I see something that I've gone off, like if i see a food I don't like anymore or smell something that I don't like I'll have a brief moment of nausea but as soon as i move away from the smell or whatever it goes straight away.
I so wish the magic 12 week thing wasn't so spoken about, I really do think it gives such false hope for some women and for me it made me feel so miserable because I just kept thinking "I cannot last another few months like this" I sobbed to my DP so many times saying "I can't do this anymore" but I will say I feel so much more positive now the sickness seems to have lifted, its like a weight has been lifted x

Just want to echo what others have said - I have hg and my gp is crap but pregnancy sickness support have been AMAZING. They’ll give you so much info on medication and validate your feelings. I tried various medication combos and ended up having to practically demand Odansetron - would never have done something like that without the encouragement of pregnancy sickness support. I would also say that taking the cyclizine regularly and daily is key - it took about 3 days on that before I felt the difference, at first I was incredibly drowsy but after day 3 that went away completely and it has no side effects whatsoever now.

Absolutely push for the Ondansetron. It made a huge difference to me (I was vomiting 30+ times a day without and only once or twice with BUT the all-day nausea was massively reduced). I found the nausea more debilitating than the vomiting itself.
I was able to cut down the dose quite quickly too so I was only taking half a tablet a day from week 20.

Thank you so much everyone. I'll try to respond to you all individually as I get chance.
I'll ring pregnancy sickness support today if they're open, what shall I say just how I'm feeling and what the doctors have said up to now? The nurse never said a thing about making sure I take them like clockwork like you would antibiotics, she just said as and when you to 3 a day, but obviously it's drilled into you meds aren't good in pregnancy and I was scared of becoming tolerant to them and then not working at all! I've now set a reminder on my phone to take them at 8am, 2pm and 8pm every day. The doctor is ringing on Monday to see how I'm doing after giving me the metoclopramide on Tuesday so I'll be able to tell her what pregnancy sickness support have advised.
14 weeks today and it's just no better I feel like time is on slow motion. I hardly had a busy life anyway but I just want my life back where I wasn't in a constant state of anxiety from the nausea.

@Littletoaster2021 Thank you. Did sickness support advise you what to say to your GP then? Did you end up sticking with cyclizine? I'm going to start taking it at set times every day, I was under the impression it was just an as and when kind of medication so I usually was taking one and night and one mid afternoon if it was a really bad day x

I feel for you. It's actually more debilitating than people think. I hate the term 'morning sickness' too because it was all bloody day 24/7.

I have been sick in all my pregnancies bit they've all eased by 16 weeks, thankfully.

@BertieBoo88 I'm so sorry you're suffering like this, whatever you decide is completely legitimate. I felt I should reply because I felt very similarly in my first (much wanted) pregnancy, it's the worst I've ever felt and honestly I would have preferred to be dead. I should also say at around 14 weeks I had the same panic because the nausea was still there and I'd heard the stories about it lasting, but over the next few weeks it started to improve and was gone pretty quickly.

More though, it's only after it all improved for me that I realised what a dark place I was in. I had tried telling my my midwives that I wasn't coping but I think I was too ashamed to be really honest about what I was feeling - so my only suggestion would be when you speak to the doctor and pregnancy support be strident and honest about how bad you're feeling and if you haven't already I would tell them that you're seriously considering a termination. Sometimes it's hard to get through to them how bad you're feeling, if you have the energy keep pressing them about it. I know it's so hard, I wish I'd pressed them more about it but I was in such a dark place I just couldn't do it. I really wish you the best of luck and hope that whatever happens it improves for you soon ❤️

@BertieBoo88 yeah unfortunately I have found a lot of people simply can’t imagine what it feels like to experience this rather than standard morning sickness, medical professionals included! I’ve taken cyclizine for 4 weeks now, very quickly it hugely reduced my nausea and reduced my vomiting to about 3 times a day - much more manageable. But because I had got so weak before that point I really needed to stop being sick so I could get enough calories to recover my strength, so I have tried combining cyclizine with Prochlorperazine (didn’t really help) and with metoclopramide (stopped sickness entirely, appetite began to recover, but then developed terrible insomnia as a side effect so had to stop). Definitely worth trying cyclizine plus another if cyclizine alone doesn’t work - combining is v common. Because that wasn’t effective for me I asked/demanded odansetron. This is my first full day on it so we’ll see how it goes. I’m also 14 so am praying the sickness also starts to lesson of its own accord.

I know it’s very hard to overcome the message that you shouldn’t take medication when pregnant, but truly these drugs are very frequently prescribed, they’re safe, and you’re a human being who deserves quality of life! It is definitely possible to improve with meds. I think the difficulty is also that by 14 weeks you’ve felt fucking horrible for SO LONG and it is depressing and relentless. so please be kind to yourself xx

*14 weeks, not 14 years old

How you doing @BertieBoo88 ? X

@Bythefire90

How you doing *@BertieBoo88* ? X

Been taking the cyclizine 3 x a day since I got the advice from this thread. I have been able to eat ever so slightly better but still constant nausea. The GP rang this morning and she's swapping me to prochlorperazine? Sending DP to pick them up later. Anyone tried them?

@BertieBoo88 well done! I had constant nausea on cyclizine and decided to put up with it rather than risk my baby on the other tablets given to me in addition to cyclizine, I think it was the same as yours... Google the drug name and look up the information on it for pregnancy to decide for yourself, there's the BUMPS website which is shows all the risks for meds in pregnancy. Read it.

You may decide the nausea is a smaller price to pay for than potential defects or complications? Depends on the level of nausea you're experiencing on the guess...

Yes I’ve taken that - you can combine it with cyclizine too so might be worth trying that? Pregnancy Sickness Support advised me that you should know after 48 hours if it’s working for you and if not to go back to the gp and ask for something else. Crossing my fingers for you!

I guess NOT the guess

OP I can completely and utterly relate. The first trimester is bloody AWFUL. There's no other word. I had hyperemesis and was vomiting even water for weeks and weeks, i felt horrific and like you became too scared to leave the house. I ended up on a cocktail of meds to control the nausea and vomiting- there are things you can take to help so don't suffer - ask your midwife / GP. I started to feel more human from around 18 weeks onwards, it does get better.

I'm now 2 weeks from my due date and although the third trimester is challenging and uncomfortable in its own ways, it's so much more bearable than the hell of the first. Hang in there.

Yeah it’s the worst. You have my sympathy. All I can say is that by comparison the newborn stage is amazing.

Been taking the cyclizine 3 x a day since I got the advice from this thread. I have been able to eat ever so slightly better but still constant nausea.
The GP rang this morning and she's swapping me to prochlorperazine? Sending DP to pick them up later.
Anyone tried them?

I was on a combination of Cyclizine, Prochlorperazine and ondanestron for the first few months. You can take several together if needs be so don't lose hope if the first meds you try don't help.

I could have written your posts. I tried for 4 years to conceive my first after a mmc and then I fantasised about miscarriage daily. During my pregnancy with dc2 I seriously considered abortion, I've never been so miserable. I was jealous of dh because he got to go out without me and I was stuck with myself all the bloody time.

With my second pregnancy I felt sick throughout, but wasn't actually sick that often. Chewing indigestion tablets after food helped. It did get a little better after 16 weeks, but never went. The second I gave birth I felt amazing.

With my third pregnancy I was violently sick, couldn't hold down water even and then from about 15 weeks I felt okay, knackered and grumpy but not sick.

I'm not maternal either and found them a chore as toddlers, they're 10 and 13 now and I absolutely love being their mum.

I hear you. 9 months of nausea, discomfort and soberness culminating in a painful experience after which your body will possibly never be the same again. The baby/child is so worth it but I really question people who claim to enjoy pregnancy itself.

Did not enjoy my second pregnancy at all. Did not have sickness, but had no energy to do anything and just wanted the baby out as soon as possible, so I could go to being a 'normal' mum to my firstborn. I don't really understand women, who enjoy pregnancy. I did it the second time, because I wanted a sibling for my first child, but till this day I view pregnancy as a nuisance, a chore.

OP, just persevere and think that you will have a beautiful sibling for your dc1.

I don’t have a lot different to say apart from I felt very similar. Planned and much wanted first pregnancy but completely floored by the constant nausea and retching. Couldn’t eat and lost a stone quite quickly. My worst week was probably 13wks but have massively improved since then (30wks now) Still have low level nausea but manageable for the most part. I also struggled when it wasn’t gone by 12wks, the disappointment made me feel even lower.

What shocked me more than all this was the effect on my mental health. Really felt like I couldn’t go on, regretted being pregnant, couldn’t even think about the baby at all and decided I wouldn’t be sad at all if I miscarried. I explained all this to my midwife and she didn’t really comment at all other than she’d ask me again at my next appt how I was feeling 🥴 I really think the impact of pregnancy sickness on mental health is not taken seriously enough. I’m sure it triggered a type of depression for me. As my physical symptoms have improved my mental state has as well, but I’m not excited about the baby in the way I expected to be.

Re medication, just like others have said if one doesn’t work - ask for another. I was given metoclopramide first but it did nothing, then ondansetron which was amazing but caused constipation 🙈, when I rang for a repeat prescription of ondansetron the GP wouldn’t issue it again so gave me cyclizine which actually worked Ok and didn’t make me constipated. I think I was past the worst by this point though.

Not sure my rambling is much help, but just wanted to say I really feel for you

I never actually experienced any of the physical symptoms. I did the mental health though. I’m still unsure if they symptoms were from pregnancy depression - although they started from her second I saw the positive test. Or because I didn’t actually want to be pregnant and have a baby.

I’m terminated at 8 weeks. This was around 1 month ago. I felt instantly brighter but not sure if this was the correct choice or not.

I hate being a woman sometimes.

I hope you feel better very soon.

@dropthedeadhorse

I hear you. 9 months of nausea, discomfort and soberness culminating in a painful experience after which your body will possibly never be the same again. The baby/child is so worth it but I really question people who claim to enjoy pregnancy itself.

Some people do, dropthedeadhorse. I did, never felt nausea, only vomited once early on in the morning, clear fluid, had heartburn once after something I ate. I was in good health, ate well and worked until ten days before giving birth. The labour and birth were straightforward too, small episiotomy which was stitched and healed well.

However when I read some of the stories on here, which really do bring tears to my eyes - and obviously I know several people who had a hard time - I do realise how very fortunate I was and count my blessings.

(I can't say I felt all that good for quite a while after giving birth but that's another story with which I will not bore you.)

I had terrible morning sickness from 12-20 weeks and I am now 27 weeks and it has come back. I agree, I've had about 2 weeks out of my pregnancy where I have felt 'normal'. I usually cry every day as I find it so physically and mentally tough!