Absolutely effing HATE being pregnant

[BertieBoo88]

There.. I said it. I'm sorry for people who long to be pregnant and don't want to sound ungrateful.
But I fucking HATE being pregnant. I'm only 14 weeks and I feel constantly on the brink of vomiting so I can't even go to Tesco without having a panic attack.. all I can do is lay in bed or on the sofa. 6 months sounds like a lifetime away. I feel like I'm on the worst rollercoaster and all I want to do is get off. How is this meant to be the most natural thing in the world!? What a joke. I think it's triggered some underlying depression and I just feel like my life has stopped. Everyone is going to work or living their lives the best they can in the circumstance and this pregnancy has put my life on pause. Seriously wondering if it's too late to do something about it to be honest.
Sorry I just needed a rant.

Totally understand OP. This is my 3rd and was a total shock. I've found it physically and emotionally very, very challenging. I'm 11+3 now and still in shock and feeling tearful and low.

I've felt extremely nauseous although in the past few days that has eased slightly. I would say I'm at 6/10 for nausea instead of 10/10 constant like it has been. It probably helps that I've worked out what foods help and just got into the rhythm of eating every few hours. Fruity/juicy ice lollies are your friend.

I was referred to perinatal mental health like a PP, but when I chased it up they said they don't make contact until after the 12 week scan. So the first 3 months of emotional hell I've apparently just to blindly manage myself

I've lost any desire to go anywhere or do anything so I completely sympathise. I used to sometimes sneak to Tesco when the kids were in bed to get some peace, but I can't face driving and by the kids bedtime I'm so exhausted I just go to bed myself. Can hardly manage to watch TV with my DH after he finished work. It's really shit just now.

I'm right there with you. I'm 8 weeks and I've been dry heaving the last month, bouts of vertigo , my blood pressure has plummeted and I cant go anywhere incase I faint, barely sleeping , barely eating and i feel like this was the biggest mistake of my life. I dont feel right , i dont feel myself and i hate it . Cant even talk about the baby because I'm genuinely not excited for 7 more months of hell.

You're not alone. I hate it so much too. I felt crap the whole way through my first pregnancy and I am 25 weeks into my second and still feeling rubbish. I just want to feel me again.

Literally the day after I gave birth I felt better though and I keep reminding myself it doesn't last forever.

The only thing that got me through my second pregnancy was the certainty it would be my last. I was 45. I had nausea, but no sickness, which was almost worse. I remember being sick after a coughing fit and it was a relief. And the reflux. Oh, and feet and ankles like a bloody hippopotamus.

None of this was helped by my mother's wide eyed shock because she SAILED through pregnancy. People would have to see the baby to even believe she was pregnant. She was up a ladder cleaning windows at 38 weeks. No sickness. No pain. Aw shut up Mother. Thanks for the solidarity.

It's OK to hate being pregnant. Hopefully you'll be one of the majority who do start to feel better at some point. You have my sympathy.

@Goleor I totally understand how you feel. That's another thing I didn't mention, my BP is really low too. I just sometimes wish I could go to bed and wake up and it had all been a dream (nightmare) if I'd have known I was going to feel this way I would've never got pregnant and would just stuck to having my son. At the moment my desire to no longer feel this way out weighs the desire to have another baby x

I hated every single second.
It's part of the reason I've only got the one child. I just don't think I can do it again.

I felt the same OP, so depressed and sick all day. Second trimester was better and even now at the very end I still feel better than I did at the start. I think it triggers some kind of depression in some people. Really hope you start to feel better soon

@BertieBoo88 yes 20 weeks it just lifted and that was that! It did get replaced with heartburn shortly after but I could deal with that in comparison! I was only physically such a handful of times, it was mainly just constant nausea. I do understand how consuming it feels at the time but once it goes it just becomes a bad memory and life resumes. Sounds like your hormones are all over the place which is totally normal, but should settle in the next few weeks.

No judgment from me whatsoever for thinking about termination but just to add that I’ve also been through termination when I was feeling incredibly sick and hormonal and although the relief was immediate, the psychological trauma that followed lasted a lot longer than 20 weeks and was very difficult. Just wanted to share that perspective that it may feel like a ‘fix’ to take away your immediate pain but could have longer lasting pain of a different kind. (Not the case for everyone I know, just speaking from my experience, if this baby is otherwise wanted)

I’d look into acupuncture straight away as lots of clinics that offer it are open now, they class as health care, so you might be able to get in somewhere now. Worth a go, I’ve read good things and I think I’ll definitely try it if I ever need to again!

I’m sorry you’re not getting the support you need from family etc. I felt the same. People just don’t get it

@BertieBoo88 this is my first and my last and I keep thinking that I should have just gotten a puppy 😂😂😂 midwife telling me then that low blood pressure is a good thing. Oh yeah the lack of oxygen to my brain and almost blacking out in the street is an absolute hoot. I'm never ever doing this again, I cant he selfless and suffer through. I'm at my wits end with all this and at the moment it's not worth it for another person.

I hated it too but I didn't mind giving birth. My friend loved being pregnant but hated giving birth. We are all different I guess.

I'm not enjoying pregnancy. its not something I ever expected to be difficult. it's making me feel awful and exhausted and sick all the time. I just want it over with and to have my baby now
xxxxx

Genuinely looking up abortions after 14 weeks at the moment and thinking it's probably the best option. I just can't do this. My son won't have a mother if I continue this pregnancy as I just don't want to live feeling this way any longer.

I'm sure you can see it through. Take it one day at a time. Rest and forget everything else. You are growing and entire human being. You are awesome. You will get there.

[quote BertieBoo88]@BeingATwatItsABingThing so you started to feel better after 15 weeks? Same as you but the other way around, with my first I just had the odd wobble here and there but nothing like how it is now this time x[/quote]
From memory (DD1 is 7), it was about then. She was a contraceptive failure so it felt like a punishment for getting pregnant. I would have a period of around 5 minutes of feeling hungry and, if I missed that window, I couldn’t eat at all. The thought of putting food in my mouth had me gagging. Add to that that I had a UTI and it was just a double whammy. Hated every minute of it.

I was never actually sick, just felt like I was about to be sick near permanently. I think being sick would have possibly helped alleviate the feeling but I really hate being sick. Real phobia of it.

I don’t remember the feeling going completely like one day it was there and then it wasn’t. It eased gradually until it was gone completely. I loved every minute of my pregnancy after that.

I'm 34 weeks and apart from a couple of weeks I've fiercely hated being pregnant.

The first trimester sucks, the second trimester hounded me with PGP and shortness of breath and in the third trimester I have PGP, can't sleep, can't walk far without my back or lungs giving out and I get weekly antenatal/midwife/other appointments as my body just isn't coping.

Don't get me wrong I want the baby, but if I could get my OH to suffer instead of me that would be preferable.

I TOTALLY empathise. I hope your miserable symptoms ease :(

OP I know exactly how you feel. I really struggled in both my pregnancies. Physically and emotionally. I ended up taking all the anti-sickness drugs I could convince the GP to prescribe, and antidepressants. And it was still fucking horrible.I’m a bloody midwife! I felt like such a failure because I felt like I should be able to do better. I must have discussed termination with DH a hundred times. I made him get a vasectomy as soon as possible after DD was born.

I completely get it OP, apart from doing my days work I was useless. Didn't know how I would get through 9 months. Have a teen already & never felt any of this. My gp was less then helpful but hospital consultant was brilliant. She actually listened to me & explained that what I was suffering was not normal. She prescribed Cariban & it is no exaggeration to say it has been life changing, expensive but worth it. Not dreading the next 6 months half as much.

You have my support. I suffered through every week until I delivered spontaneously at just before 32 weeks. Everybody around me was panicking with him so early but I was just so relieved he'd be out and I could stop suffering. I actually walked to a bridge at one point and considered jumping off to end it. I don't understand the magic everybody else has.

That said, it's been nearly 3 years and I'm trying for another one. I got pregnant in November and half convinced myself every pregnancy is different and it might be better but even by 7 weeks (when I had a miscarriage) it was bloody awful.

Hang in there! At least the result is really cute. Only silver lining.

I completely understand how u feel. I’m currently in the same boat at 11 weeks. I was exactly the same with my first. Have u heard of HyperemesisGravidarum. I’ve been diagnosed with this. I’m part of a support charity called pregnancy sickness support. They have a Facebook pageThere can talk to u 1 2 1 or in a group or even get a peer support for u. It helped me to talk to someone who knew exactly what I was going through.

I'm sorry some of you feel like that. I embrace it. I suppose being my first pregnancy and an IVF one at that I wanted the Morning sickness (which never happened) I didn't enjoy the treatment one bit but had to stay strong knowing (hoped) something good is going to happen. I have 3 weeks to go and my body has gone through so many changes. Moods have been over the place but I took myself off for walks or music I can sing to or picks me up. I have spent this week mainly in hospital with a suspected clot on the lung, had more injections and X-rays. The only thing I'm scared of and feeling anxious is the birth it's self and then meeting my baby. You guys might feel different once you feel your baby move which is a weird feeling but pleasant.

@SteakChips congratulations on your pregnancy, I’m glad it’s worked out well for you. I think though what people are talking about here is constant debilitating nausea, and as you said you haven’t had that, it’s hard to imagine how awful it really makes you feel. Before I was pregnant I could never have imagined hating pregnancy because of nausea, I thought I’d just get on with it and be happy because it was for a good reason. But the reality of feeling like you’re on the brink of throwing up all day every day for weeks or months on end is hideous. It consumes you and takes the joy out of everything. Even if you wanted to be pregnant and are grateful to be pregnant.

@Hadenough21 I understand what everyone is saying. Maybe I didn’t portray my feelings well. I absolutely hated the fact that I couldn’t full pregnant naturally for many years. The feeling might be similar - every month getting negative results, not finding out why this is happening. The mood swings not just falling naturally but that fact your injecting endless hormones to stop and start. Once embryo was planted with in 3 days I had chronic pains in my uterus to the point I was convince it didn’t work but wasn’t allowed to test. At this point I shut off from everyone and wanted to end things and was so low I could handle anything. I knew I couldn’t afford another around and this was my only attempt. Lucky it did take but not without feeling guilty and regret that I could of potentially harm myself and my baby. So yes, I wanted the morning sickness to feel like I am pregnant - sort of a reassurance. I do not hate being pregnant but I hated it because mine wasn’t natural and the pressure I put myself mentally and physically which still plays with my emotions now. Could I do it again, probably not.

I’m so glad for you that you’ve had a successful pregnancy but it really isn’t fair to come on a thread about debilitating pregnancy symptoms and suggest that anyone should feel fortunate to be so poorly. It’s awful, I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. And I’ve had a baby before and loved feeling her move, it doesn’t make the early months any easier.

@SteakChips - your story has made me feel very grateful this morning. I’ll be thinking of u when I feel like I’m in the pits of shit and tell myself there are people going through worse 💜

@Ninonk - I think she’s just looking at it from a diff angle, not trying to make anyone feel bad. We may never know what Steak Chips is going through the way she may never know what we’re going through but we’re all going through something and we just have to keep our eyes fixated on the finishing line. Ladies let me tell you the moment that baby is out of you and you get that amazing tea and toast served to you in hospital it’s like you’re on cloud 9 x