Immune/ NK cells - Pred threat 27

[LaurenAB94]

@Bambii @Daffodil21 @Eeviee @Everhopeful35 @farfromperfect82 @Eeviee @Everhopeful35 @Hazlet2 @farfromperfect82 @HoldingOn2Hope @Jellystar23 @KtAgs @Lalaifa @LookingforAnswers86 @Marabouchoc @LRL12 @MrsMargot @Naticle @NessyT91 @NessyT91 @NICK7nick7 @rainwillmaketheflowersgrow @Rebecca9876 @Sophfr17 @Tinpo @VenusStarr @Wheresmyrainbow @Whyisthistakingsolong

@KtAgs amazing news!!! Congratulations! X

Wonderful news @KtAgs congratulations on your son. So pleased he is here safely 💙 it does give me hope, thank you xx

Congratulations @Sarahdaydreamer1234 I don't have any advice as I've not been pregnant on the immune protocol. But Dr Shehata prescribes 25mg (I'm on it from ovulation) but some are from bfp.

I've just my first fragmin injection - not pleasant!

Hope everyone is doing well xx

@venusstarr thank you the fact some people only start at BFP does make me feel a lot better.. Im hoping it's all enuf to keep this baby safe but only time can tell I suppose!! Good luck with the fragmin I'm sure they will get easier in time!

@ktags congratulations ❤️

@VenusStarr hope everything goes well for you! I used to absolutely hate needles but after a few days of injecting clexane it was honestly fine. You'll get there, keep going ❤️

Thanks everyone for the messages of support. I honestly feel like I’m at breaking point.

HR were useless. She did start by saying she was very sorry for what I’d been through. I ended up bursting into tears when telling her how upsetting it was being told that my absence had impacted on the team and that it was a mess for my boss to pick up!

I’m sure the HR lady told my boss I had got upset and so you would have expected them to be nice on the call today. On the contrary, my husband said it was like a police interrogation and my boss was sarcastic an horrible.

The irony is I’m a lawyer (actually hate myself lol) and so they know I know my rights. They’re trying to backtrack a bit but the seed is sown that they don’t want me there. She said patronising things about the work being complex and pressured like I can’t handle that!

Sorry for the rant! I can’t even think about anything related to ttc as I am so stressed!

I hope everyone else is doing ok xx

Congratulations @KtAgs amazing news hope your both doing well 💙

Congratulations @KtAgs! That’s lovely news on the arrival of your son. What have you called him?

@VenusStarr I’ve been thinking of you and hoping everything goes well with your retrieval. Everything crossed 🤞

@Badlydrawngirly I’m really sorry you’re going on through such an awful time with your employer. I hope everything gets sorted out for you.

I’ve gone a bit AWOL the last couple of weeks. It’s a total mind f**k being pregnant after our losses. I have my first scan at 7 weeks tomorrow and desperately hoping for good news. I’ve been feeling extremely sick and vomiting almost everyday this past week which I’ve never had before and hope is a good sign. Time will tell I suppose!

Thank you @NessyT91 wishing you lots of love for tomorrow ❤️❤️ sorry you've been so sick but hoping that's a positive sign 🤞

I'm booked in for egg collection for Monday morning. I've really only got 3 follicles in the running which is similar to my letrozole cycle but they're pushing me to grow a bit further, 2 are already 21mm whereas with the superovulation I triggered at 17mm. Really hoping we get a couple of good eggs.

I'm so sorry you've being treated so badly @Badlydrawngirly it leaves a bad taste doesn't it 😕 sending you a big hug.

How are you @Rainbowdreams1983 @Tumby?

Hipe everyone else is doing well xx

@KtAgs, congratulations! That's wonderful news and proof that it is all worth it!!

@KtAgs that's so amazing!!! Huge congratulations 💙💙💙 I'm also on the complex plan. Have had 5 losses in total - 4 with my current partner in 3 years. It's a lovely thing to post so thank you for the hope! Can I just ask whether you test after 10 days of being on the Cyclogest at the point of ovulation & stop if it's a negative? I'm finding the whole plan very confusing as only started a couple of weeks ago!!

@Badlydrawngirly - I really do feel for what you're going through. I just don't understand the callousness of companies sometimes. Not making it about me, but it happened to me last year - I was sacked on the spot 2 weeks after my miscarriage. It was devastating. But what I pursued it though, like you & managed to settle with them. So it was worth it in the end! It sounds like you have support in your husband but feel free to rant/send me a message as I can really empathise with your situation xx

@VenusStarr - I hope you're feeling a little better than you were. I'm ok thank you, just feels a bit weird ttc again after the last loss. Holding out all the hope for you with your egg collection.

@Rainbowdreams1983 - how are you finding the hydroxy? It makes me feel exhausted & nauseous (well, not sure if it's that or just the whole experience!)

Sending best wishes to all xxx

@KtAgs congratulations that is fantastic news we are all so happy for you!! Xx

@VenusStarr I hope your egg collection goes well Monday. Blood thinning injections are pretty unpleasant, I found they got easier to do but my tummy turned a lovely shade of black and blue

I've been quite neurotic this week at times but it seems to happen more and more these days lol! Still waiting for my period to come, having signs so hopefully won't be long and I can book in for my ovulation intralipids

@Tumby I also felt off on the hydroxychloroquine at first - sick, headaches, upset stomach, extra tired and it made my already long standing insomnia worse. Tonight when doing a lateral flow test I had blood on the swab from my nose, never had a nose bleed before. I'm not going to panic as I am taking asprin and strong omega 3 tablets which thins the blood but I have read it can be a serious side effect of the hydroxy. I feel fine otherwise. I've skipped my asprin and omega 3 tonight and will see what the situation is like tomorrow as I really don't want to be on prednisone during the pandemic even though I've had both jabs. I hope you start to feel better on it soon. It does say on the leaflet if side effects persist to speak to your Dr so may be worth mentioning to Dr S.

@Badlydrawngirly I am so sorry you are having such a difficult time with work. I just cannot believe in this day and age workplaces can be so unsupportive with all you have been through, its absolutely disgusting. Has your union given you any advice?

@KtAgs massive congratulations! It's so good to hear success stories, keeps me going

@NessyT91 I hope your scan goes well tomorrow

I hope all you other lovely ladies are doing ok

Xxx

@KtAgs congratulations! ❤ Thank you for sharing, positive stories keep me going xx

Hi everyone, thanks for all the messages of support. I feel a bit stronger but I know the most unpleasant bit is yet to come.

@Rainbowdreams1983, I’m not in a union unfortunately but I have started the ball rolling on instructing an employment lawyer. I can’t believe it either, I thought I had joined a really nice employer. They started out supportive but clearly want me out.

@Tumby - that’s shocking and disgraceful! They obviously know that the 2 weeks after your protected from pregnancy related discrimination but didn’t think that anything after that can amount to sex discrimination! It’s outrageous and against the law! I really do feel like I’m being pushed out because they know I’m trying to get pregnant. Whatever happens I’ll be leaving.

@NessyT91 - thank you. I just wanted it all sorted so I can concentrate on IVF without the stress.

@VenusStarr you’re right, it’s left a very bad taste. Especially the tone of the call on Thursday after they knew how upset I’d got on Wednesday.

Good luck for Monday! Will be keeping everything crossed for you, all sounds promising so far!

I hope everyone else is doing ok - sorry if I’ve missed anyone, my brain is frazzled.

I think we will be staying in the UK for ivf so that we can do embryo banking and then PGS testing. I’m looking at the lister x

@Badlydrawngirly a different situation but I resigned from my job a few weeks ago because my boss was trying to force me to go into a building site, while heavily pregnant during a pandemic. I explained why I wasn't happy to and he disregarded all my concerns and was discussing with an external HR advisor (very small company) to try and make me go. I got a doc note saying fit to work but wfh only but it was all super stressful and I was worried about it affecting my pregnancy so I resigned. He's definitely been behaving differently since I told him I was pregnant and they even had the cheek to throw it back in my face that I had a week off after my last mc (I took 2 weeks but one was prebooked hol).

He clearly wanted me gone so he's got what he wants but at least I don't have to deal with him anymore. My maternity will start 2 months earlier than planned but I made sure I qualified for it before I resigned.

Disgusting how people think they can treat employees in these situations. I'm sorry you're going through this x

@Daffodil21 I’m so sorry, that’s awful! It never ceases to amaze me how awful people can be. What would he think if someone did that to his wife?

Even though there are laws to protect us people seem to think they can ignore themselves an I think a lot of the times they get away with it.

I’m glad you will get your maternity leave and more importantly that you won’t have to deal with the stress while pregnant!

I made the mistake of being open wi my female boss about previous losses and the fact we are going to need IVF. I also have an auto immune conditions which they’ve been told by occupational health they need to make reasonable adjustments for.

I just want to get out of there now and use my energy for IVF.

@Badlydrawngirly I also made the mistake of sharing with him. I worked elsewhere for my first two mcs and they were amazing. I made the mistake of telling me new boss that it was 3rd when it happened again in November, and so he knew that in December when I told him I was pregnant again it was my 4th. I told him early because I was getting a bit stressed out and I also knew I'd have a lot of appointments and it would likely go the usual way so I was expecting to have to tell
about it a couple of weeks later anyway. He couldn't have sung my praises higher before November, and after that there's been a big change with him making comments insinuating that I wasn't good at my job (which was total BS). I joked to my husband that he was creating a little black book so he could get rid of me now he knows my priorities are not him and his job, and the construction site thing was just the last straw. The worst part is he and his wife have had lots of fertility issues and losses too, and ended up adopting, so you would have thought he would be more compassionate. But nope!
I stated the reasons for leaving clearly in my resignation letter and he clearly sh*t himself a bit because he put me on gardening leave instead of working my notice!

I'm so glad to be rid of him. It means less money than when we were anticipating at this stage but it's so worth it not to have to deal with him anymore. I also have no idea what I'm going to do when my maternity stops in March as I won't have the option of a job open to me but for now we are trying to save everything I bring in to see if my husband's wages are enough to support us when mine stops. Some things just aren't worth the £!

I hope you get to a resolution soon and you don't have to lose out. Also glad you're a lawyer so you're in a good position!! I really hope they don't get away with this! X

@Daffodil21 that is appalling. My boss has tried to do it in a clever way by saying others in the team are working 12 hour days (knowing that I can’t) and saying the deals are pressured and complex. I never said I had an issue with complex or pressured work. It’s all being said to undermine me. Last year she was singing my praises and putting me in her succession plan and had all sorts of things planned for me.

It’s awful for him to put you under so much stress (and it frankly dangerous situations) when you’re pregnant.

My husband made a good point about how they would be acting if I hadn’t lost the baby and couldn’t do the ridiculous hours they’re demanding. I’m not sure how they would be but I’m glad I won’t be staying there to find out.

I wish I hadn’t been so open but I couldn’t hide the miscarriage as I needed surgery and then had complications and I honestly thought that honesty was the best policy. I think she was annoyed deep down that I’d had the audacity to get pregnant after only being there a year! She claims to be a feminist too!

I have the same financial concerns as you as in reality I won’t be able to take another job and do ivf but I know I can’t delay it much longer so I could be looking at being off work for 2 years when I factor in mat leave too. I could potentially take some short term work while pregnant but that could be more stressful and I just think it’s harder to get a job when you’re pregnant.

I hope your boss feels ashamed and karma bites him in the ass!

@Badlydrawngirly that's so so bad!!!!

My previous employers were so good about the whole thing. I actually went to hand in my notice once because we were TTC and nothing was happening (this was in the naive days when I didn't think I would need to worry about holding onto a pregnancy as well as getting pregnant). I was very honest about why and said we were 'struggling' (little did I know!) to conceive and I found the job stressful which couldn't be helping. Maybe I should rethink my career path as I clearly can't take it..! Anyway, they were so understanding about it, didn't accept my resignation and instead they put less pressure on me and allowed me to work part time hours. They didn't even reduce my pay even though I had reduced responsibilities. 6 weeks later I did actually conceive and one of them commented saying clearly the reduced hours and pressure had worked! Couldn't fault them at all though, even when it all went wrong they were really good.

I stupidly thought this would be the same, and on the surface he was good to begin with but clearly that wasn't genuine. I thought honesty was the best policy too, which it was for the employer I had before just not this one.

We've so far managed pretty well on my husband's wages only - it actually makes me realise how much we must have been wasting before! Only halfway through the month of course but I am pleasantly surprised thankfully. If you can afford to live on just one wage maybe that is best for now. Shouldn't have to come to that though!

My employer definitely tried to be clever about what he was saying too. He had clearly had legal advice which tbf he would have been stupid not to! He also asked me to take back my resignation but I knew it wasn't genuine (and no way was I taking it back!)

I hope karma bites your employer's in the arse too!!!!

Sorry for hijacking the thread a little. Just wanted to you let you know you're not alone having a dick of a boss (albeit different situations)

I really really hope it all works out for you ❤️ you just don't need this stress atm!

@Daffodil21 that’s how an employer should act and the way I feel is if they wanted to keep me that’s how they would act!

When I told her I was worried about coping with the long hours (that she had made clear to put in my head) I was honestly expecting a conversation around what they could do to support. Instead she dismissed any idea about alternative roles and asked me what I would do then. Clearly putting in my head I’d have to leave!

You’re not hijacking at all, it’s nice (although very saddening) to know I’m not alone!

@Badlydrawngirly absolutely disgusting! I really hope it gets sorted soon x

@Daffodil21 thank you, I really do too! I hope you can enjoy the rest of your pregnancy in peace without all the stress you were put under.

It makes my blood boil how women are treated when pregnant, after a miscarriage or when trying to conceive. There needs to be even more protection I think with minimum fines for companies!

@Badlydrawngirly I'm so sorry you're going through this with your employers, it actually brings back horrible memories for me as I went through the exact same thing 2 summers ago....after taking time off for 3 miscarriages and then ivf which I found really emotional, I was told in a meeting with my boss and an HR representative that I was a disappointment and had let down my team, it was a really horrible meeting and I was in tears (HR could not have cared less). I was pregnant at the time from the ivf which he knew but I miscarried again shortly after. After 13 years in that career which I had worked so hard to get into I walked out the door and I was absolutely devastated but it was definitely the right thing for me and my family as the stress my boss was putting me under was making me sick to my stomach. It still bothers me though and even though I put a grievance in against my boss it went nowhere. I should have taken it further but I just didn't have the energy to fight infertility and my employer! I hope you manage to find the right solution for you, it really shouldn't be this way and its incredibly disheartening in this day and age that this sort of thing still goes on!

@KtAgs congratulations on the birth of your baby boy! I think we joined the board at a similar time but no such success on my end yet, still hoping and praying it might work for me! Hope you are enjoying lots of newborn snuggles 💙 xxx

@Luckyducky2 I’m so sorry, that sounds absolutely horrendous! I’ve been made to feel the same by my female boss (that I’ve let people down and had an impact on the team and things were a mess while I was off having surgery), after she initially pretended to be caring. I should have spotted something was off when she asked why I needed surgery as I was early in the pregnancy.

I don’t know how people think that is an acceptable way to treat people but it sounds a lot more common than I ever imagined. I naively thought employment law protected us but it seems a lot of employers disregard it.

I’m waiting to see what they come back with in terms of reasonable adjustments but actually just want to leave. I have a male line manager who seems a lot more decent and hasn’t treated me any differently and it seemed like he was forced to say a few things that made him feel uncomfortable on the last call. It’s my female boss who seems to have made her mind up I can’t do the job. I really feel I am being punished for getting pregnant and the possibility that I will get pregnant in the future.

They haven’t sent me some documents relating to the occupational health referral so I strongly suspect they know they have messed up. I’m going to keep pushing but it’s causing me so much stress.

Ordinarily by now I would have had peak fertility on my OPK by now but this morning I had a blank face so fully expect that it’s stopped ovulation this month. We’re not trying but I need to know when to book in my NK cell biopsy!

I hope one day your boss realised what he put you through and gets a visit from karma!