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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Pregnant after miscarriage part 4, TTC graduates

965 replies

BecsterG · 26/10/2020 12:26

Hi Ladies, I love that there's so much chat we need a part 4!

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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SunnySideUp2020 · 11/11/2020 16:12

@MilsCookie so pleased with your update. This is truly amazing news. I am sure your girls will be perfect!
You have stayed so strong and positive and look at your little twin 💛 such a fighter catching up ans doing so well!!!!

Leok83 · 11/11/2020 17:41

@Chickoletta I am so so sorry you are having to go through this again. It's so cruel. 💔 Big Hugs xx

Leok83 · 11/11/2020 17:43

@MilsCookie that is fantastic news about your little girls! So nice to have the last scan end on a good note which is just the positivity you need going in in 12 days😊 it's going to fly by now!!
Hope your kitties all good after her vet visit this evening too!!

ChampooPapi · 11/11/2020 17:53

Just popped on to say 🙌 yay @MilsCookie 🙌 bloody fantastic news, nearly there now girl!

BS9790 · 11/11/2020 18:12

@milsCookie, amazing news. You're so close now to holding those rainbows. I'm so pleased for you that everything is looking so good with the babies 🥰🥰

TerribleImagination · 11/11/2020 18:36

Oh @Chickoletta I’m so so sorry to read your update lovey 😢 That’s heartbreaking for you all. Sending lots of love ❤️

TerribleImagination · 11/11/2020 18:37

@MilsCookie Woohoo to an amazing scan! That’s ace news! I can’t believe your girls will be here so soon, that’s so so exciting! ❤️🌈

MilsCookie · 11/11/2020 21:37

Ahhh thank you so much @AlviesMam @SunnySideUp2020 @Leok83 @ChampooPapi @BS9790 @TerribleImagination it means so much to have your wonderful support!! I can't believe how soon they're going to be here either!! ❤️❤️

Leok83 turns out she had one blocked anal gland!! And thankfully she was a good girl and it was all over and done with in about 5 minutes. Really hope it stops the scooting thing now! Thank you for your advice, I literally went to the vet because of you and now she should be less irritated!

Hope the new mamas are all okay!!

BecsterG · 12/11/2020 02:23

@MilsCookie sounds like an amazing scan. Your babies have come in so well. Not long to go now until you meet them which is so exciting!!!

@Chickoletta I'm sobriety to hear your news. It really is heartbreaking. Sending lots of love your way. 💕x

OP posts:
Whiffle77 · 12/11/2020 07:51

Really sorry to hear your news @Chickoletta, make sure you take some time to look after yourself and heal. Sending you lots of love

Whiffle77 · 12/11/2020 07:53

Hope you are OK @AlviesMam and riding out those baby blues...having our hormones going wild all the way through oregnancy/birth/loss always seems unfair to me, its hard enough work without them going wild too! How are you feeling other than that?

Thats great news @MilsCookie what a great scan! You must be feeling really pleased - proper countdown now Smile

Leok83 · 12/11/2020 09:00

@MilsCookie you are very welcome! Delighted that's great she's all sorted😊 and also very good little cat standing to get it done too!!

scrumdiddly123 · 12/11/2020 12:47

So sorry for you @Chickoletta, take care of yourself xx

ChampooPapi · 12/11/2020 12:58

@MilsCookie I can recommend this book, you definitely don't have to be as strict on things as they are, and I don't do any of the 'then have a piece of toast and a glass of water' stuff for myself. But Gina ford scheduling has worked really well with my last single (with plenty of wiggle room thrown in by me for a more relaxed approach)

I'm.doing her feeding schedule and it's working a dream, I'm doing an extra feed and and extra long sleep in the day as they arnt even due until the 24th. It's a great little book to refer too, and if you bottle feed you just replace the breast feeding with a bottle feed instead.

I'm also obviously feeding on demand, but at the moment they are always being woken on their schedule pretty much so arnt needing to demand. Good night last night, only one wake up between 11-7 at 3am. But the night before it was every 2 hours and it takes nearly an hour to feed them so I got about 2 hours sleep in two blocks. Typical cluster feeding, they often do this, one good night, followed by one of feed, feed, feed. All normal though ☺️

www.amazon.co.uk/Contented-House-Twins-Alice-Beer/dp/0091906989/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=gina+ford+twins+book&sprefix=gina+ford+tw&tag=mumsnetforu03-21&qid=1605185493&sr=8-1

Pregnant after miscarriage part 4, TTC graduates
MilsCookie · 12/11/2020 14:07

@ChampooPapi heyyy great to hear from you!! I've just ordered a copy from amazon - I need all the help I can get! Especially as a FTM I have no idea what I'm doing 🙈🤣 Sounds like your girls are doing so well! How's your c section recovery going? 😘

ChampooPapi · 12/11/2020 14:23

@MilsCookie a lot better now, I found the mental aspect of it all the hardest to be honest, the regular morphine and they gave me fentinal in the operation because I could feel so much pressure and it spun me out, I was literally being lifted and shunted physically around when the surgeon was digging around in there!. My theshold must be strong because they gave it to me three times as it just didn't seem to do anything. It was either that or go under a general which they offer at any point. I'm glad I didn't but the fentinal and then oromorph caught up with me in the end and I was pretty anxious, racing heart, but totally smacked out at the same time, for the proceeding few days.

I'm healing really well and the scar itself is fab. Feeling physically really good, and so so relieved that i can see in colour again and my mental state is so much calmer. The twins are a dream and very easy, newborns love to snuggle.and snooze so Im well rested. Just my advise is to stop the oromorph by the next morning and not continue for a second day. I said to not give me any more beyond around 11am the next morning and I was still batty as hell the next 72 hours.
And don't worry if you get freaked out by your twins and think, oh my god! Especially if you can't tell them apart at all, it's 100 percent the spinal, the drugs, the operation, the morphine! It makes.you think they are random creatures who have been given to you, you know you have to protect them at all costs and look after them but that immediate bonding is very hard when your so confused you think they are one of the same. Hopefully you'll only have a short stay, but if not, when you get home it'l be more the sweeter.

I'm now completely obsessed by mine and find them a doddle to tell apart ☺️

ChampooPapi · 12/11/2020 17:59

@AlviesMam how are you feeling? It's overwhelming isn't it when you finally settle at home and all is well so to speak, there's all this emotion but with no where to go or channel it to.

The anxiety and worry and having the end point, the birth, has a weird way of sustaining you and focusing your mind. The baby goal keeps you laser focussed and distracted in lots of ways. Then once the baby arrives it can be difficult to move on I think from the pregnancy and the way you've got used to getting through the day, this is a new normal and it will take some getting used to.

Even though your totally besotted with your baby and no doubt thinking about her all the time, it is like 'what now?' or 'so my life is now this?' or even 'how will I cope with this baby, how do I care for this baby for the rest of its life!'.

All so so normal, in fact you only don't feel this I think if you've got children already and you kind of know that the feeling totally passes, though of course those are questions you ask yourself for ever. Especially as phases come and go.

With my ten year old I hadn't asked those questions to myself for a good year, then the last few weeks I've found myself asking them like she's a baby again. I think because she'll be moving up to secondary school in September, she's just done her 11 plus, so that was the focus the last year like a pregnancy is, and now the 11 plus baby is born so to speak, I'm now back to worrying about her and her future, my future, her safety as she fly's the nest a little more every month and every year that passes. How do I keep her safe.

It doesn't help for us expectant mums that there is nothing open for interaction with other mother's and father's, and other babies. Plus the midwive visits and health visitor support has been taken away post birth.

Phone calls are not the same are they really!

Anyway all the love to you, and we are all here for you 🥰

MilsCookie · 12/11/2020 20:29

@ChampooPapi wow sounds like it was tough... I don't think I realised there were so many drugs involved?! Is that the case for everyone do you know? I genuinely just thought you got the spinal block and then when that wore off you survived on paracetamol/codeine! 🙈 Great to hear your scar is healing well though and your feeling much better!! I think for me it's the mental side I'm more worried about too... I feel like I'm telling myself to be brave and it will all be okay, even though I'm really scared deep down!! I'm also just dreading the girls being taken away and my DP going with them and I'll be all alone 😭 (we've decided if they do go straight to NICU then he should be with them while I'm in recovery). I just feel a bit like, ffs I have carried these babies for 9 months and they just get taken away and I'm not even the first person to spend time with them?! Obviously want DP to be with them haha I just feel jealous 🙈🤣

Whiffle77 · 13/11/2020 07:33

I seem to have reached the "hate everyone and everything" stage of pregnancy... 😬 or at least i hope its pregnancy related!!

MilsCookie · 13/11/2020 11:16

@Whiffle77 🤣 oh no!!! Are you ok? I'm beginning to feel claustrophobic and trapped in my own body. I almost cried last night because I could NOT get comfy in bed (and I struggle most of the day as well) I know that sounds ridiculous and I feel so lucky to be having these babies but my god it is hard work! 🙈

mlax · 13/11/2020 11:43

Ladies I have a question.. at what point do you start monitoring movements? I'm 24+2 and usually baby moves before lunch and then allllways on an evening however I've not felt anything this morning at all and I'm getting worried.. but not sure whether it's reasonable to be calling the midwife? Any advice?

FireflyGirl · 13/11/2020 12:39

@mlax I think they usually say about 28 weeks, but if you've been having regular movement and it has changed, definitely call.

In my trust, it's not the midwife that you have your appointments with who you call for reduced movements, it's the antenatal day unit at the hospital. Their details were on the front of my notes (and highlighted by the community midwife).

@MilsCookie I totally get where you're coming from. I hated being pregnant, especially at the end. All worth it, though. You and your girls are doing amazingly! And I absolutely was jealous that DH got to cuddle DD for at least 40 minutes while they stitched me up! Not fair, especially as I did all the hard work!

@Whiffle77 that's the stage of pregnancy they skim over in the books Wink

I agree with @ChampooPapi that you give birth and then it's 'now what'. It's a cycle of feed the baby, wind the baby, change the baby, get the baby to sleep, feed the baby...

DD is just starting to have periods of being alert at 3 weeks, but mostly she's pretty boring Wink

Also - not-in-the-slightest-stealthy-boast - we weighed her this morning (we bought baby scales to avoid going out as our local covid numbers are amongst the highest in the country) and she's put on over a lb from her birth weight Grin

Whiffle77 · 13/11/2020 16:57

Yes I'm fine thanks @MilsCookie just wildly veering emotions - everything is either great or absolutely awful - my poor husband has been getting it both barrels 😂 I feel similar body wise, it just feels alien to me - I cant wait to get my body back! Not in a sexy way but just want to feel like me...probably a way off even after I have given birth though! Also struggling to get comfy anywhere, best place is generally my birthing ball...
Completely understand how you feel about your DH being with the girls - hopefully you will be reunited very quickly. And then its forever to go 🙂

@mlax I think they get into a pattern at 28 weeks, I had quieter days before then which worried me - but always worth giving someone a call if you are worried.

Great growth news @FireflyGirl!! Probably a boring baby is a pretty good thing all in all!!

mlax · 13/11/2020 17:31

Thanks ladies. I ended up calling my midwife as I've still not had any movements and they told me to go in so they could listen to his heartbeat with a Doppler. They then scanned me and hes in a position where his limbs are in my belly so if he is moving I'm not feeling anything. These little monkeys really do test us. I'm so glad I rang and went though definitely puts your mind at rest!!

scrumdiddly123 · 13/11/2020 18:06

@mlax really pleased you went to get checked and all is ok!
One of the children in my bubble at work has tested positive for Covid today so I have to isolate for 2 weeks and miss my 20 week scan next Friday 😭 so gutted about that. And worried I’ve potentially caught it as was in really close contact with the child! It’s been a stressful day 😖