Catching up - TTC After Miscarriage part 3

[BecsterG]

Hi Ladies, just setting up a new thread as we're almost at the end of the current one. Let's move over when it's full.

Xx

@ChampooPapi your description of said vagina... very scary and funny. Just not looking forward to that stage!
Will remember not to look at it then🤚
And wish for yours to be back soon 😇💫

@SunnySideUp2020 I reported the thread to ask Mumsnet to intervene on her behalf and remind people that it was not a chance to vent and offload their own personal upsets by crushing her, I mean I read the title and thought 'this is not going to go to well' but the pile on has been terrifying, like the flood gates opened and she became the actual reason for others fertility issues. My mouth was open wide at some of the posts, it made me actually think fuck it, good on her for celebrating her pregnancy how she wanted, which initially I thought too she had been tactless (though I'm biast as I'm not on social media myself), but after all that hate, Jesus Christ I hope the woman goes off and spreads the love to balance it out

@SunnySideUp2020 I'd love to go on that thread and just announce my vagina's demise but I fear it wouldn't be taken well

@ChampooPapi 😂 don't!!! Stay away from the fire!

I am off to sleep 😴😴

Bloody hell, which thread is this?!

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/4043806-Bitter-friends

@TerribleImagination

You may regret reading it, it's depressing and shocking at the same time the amount of hurt and vitreol being dished out 🤔

I'm cured up in bed cringing at it, awaiting Mumsnet to actually do their job and ask people to simmer down on the poor woman

Blimey... that is a harsh thread! 😐

@ChampooPapi 🤣🤣🤣 you make me laugh. I haven't been able to see my vagina for months. And after your description I definitely don't plan to get a mirror down there anytime soon! 😳🙈 I keep having to get DP to help me trim it 🙈😂 so glamorous!!

@SunnySideUp2020 I remember having lots of cramps around that time... they are anxiety inducing but I actually think they're a good thing - shows your baby is growing and causing your uterus to grow/stretch! I've had them on and off throughout (even last week at 26 weeks) and still now they're telling me it's everything growing and stretching!

I read through some of those comments on that thread... I do get where some of them are coming from but there's no need to be so horrible to her. I have 3 friends who are going through fertility struggles at the moment and I was so nervous to tell them our news, but I did give them the heads up individually and they were grateful for that.

@MilsCookie @ChampooPapi @TerribleImagination

It was obvious she had it all wrong in the way she announced it but how was she supposed to know which way is best. She just has no clue. It is such a sensitive subject to discuss.
Sending private heads up might be seen as caring but for some others as rude. Each and every person reacts differently. I honestly think she thought she was doing the right thing by not telling them 😅
But overall i found the responses to be insulting instead of being helpful. They lashed out completely and it's sad. That girl is pregnant and strangers online are calling her the most horrible friend and person and that's not cool...
There are ways to disagree or point someone into the right direction or mindset to understand the said friends.
That was not it though.

@SunnySideUp2020 agreed, I mean the fact people are still 'responding' when the op left the thread 5 pages ago says it all. She's not there any more guys! Her delivery sucked, really she should ask for the thread to be deleted, change her user name and make a new thread worded MUCH better and I bet she's get much better responses. But I'm guessing she's not coming back to Mumsnet now for a while!

I've hidden the thread myself, it's just a circle jerk now 🙄

Anyway on to us ladies! Who's got what this week? Any scans or midwifery coming up? This week seems like another one to tick off rather then enjoy again, start of the month is always a bit slow but we are racing towards Christmas as well arnt we? I cannot wait to drink a ginourmous glass of wine over the festive period, I live for these dreams 🙏. This was actually the month of my miscarriage, 22nd of October was my 12/13 week scan where I found out the bad news. Funny old month really, maybe my babies will even come around that time, though hoping for an early November delivery really

I've spent half my night in triage. Reduced movement and then pain started. Went in at 3am, monitor showed HB was OK and some small movement, but lots of tightenings.
Internal examination showed cervix to be 1cm long and 1-2cm dilated (1 but stretched to 2 apparently). Said because it could be start of Labour and I'm not 37 weeks yet (36+4) I needed to stay in. Cried a lot, said I wanted to go home (it was 6am, I'd been up all night and didn't want checking onto a ward as everyone else was getting up for the day!)
Anyway, they said if I'd been 37 weeks, they wouldn't have suggested staying in, I'd of just gone home as wouldn't be pre-term... So I signed a paper to say i was leaving the hospital against medical advice, which made me feel really irresponsible, but I'm only 3 days off....!
Got home at 7.30am to period cramps and bleeding... Hoping this is just down to the internal examination, just waiting to see if it calms down.
In for Monitoring for the next 2 days until I'm "term".

So very tired 😩😩

@BS9790 oh dear.
I am sorry i am a little ignorant with those things birth related but i thought period cramps and bleeding were the start?
Are the tightenings like contractions?

Really hope it's not though and baby can stay a little longer in.

How are you feeling otherwise? Is your DH with you?

Sending hugs 💕

@ChampooPapi i am not racing to xmas 😆
I won't have champagne and all the delicious foods i love like foie gras.
Will probably be big and round.
And most likely none of my family will be able to come due to covid travel restrictions 😑
But for you ladies with due date before, the timing is just perfect 😇 and i hope you ll be feasting for the rest of us !!

But i will tick off this week and the next. Until i have a scan 🤞 although midwife hasn't confirmed a date yet.
I am getting married on 25th oct.
Got midwife appt on 28th with some doppler action as you say. Looking forward to this.

Anyone with anterior placenta had trouble with doppler? Saw online it might not be easy to find HB...

@BS9790 oh god that is seriously stressful for you, I personally think you made the right call only being a few days off because as you know, you'd be stuck in there waiting around feeling god awful for days otherwise, maybe longer. You can go back in at any point from home too, your husband is with you right? Are you in bed tucked up, because you need sleep now and then reassess when you have woken up and eaten something. Even maybe have that as the plan, sleep for a couple of hours, eat, then just go back in for the bleeding and to see how things lay. Then if you have to stay in or go into full established labour your physically much more prepared. Sending a bug hug 🥰

@ChampooPapi, yes that's why I wanted to come home, I needed some rest. I managed about an hours sleep when I got home, I'm going to try and doze a bit now and see what the bleeding is like in an hour or so. I can feel him moving so not too concerned just yet. My husband is here, he's working from home and is absolutely knackered too as he spent 4 hours sat in the hospital car park 🙈

@SunnySideUp2020, I think cramps can be a sign of Labour starting but not bleeding. I don't think that's normal. Just feel exhausted, not worried about gestation if Labour does start (which I don't think it will) as we're pretty much full term and he's been measuring a good size up to now.

@BS9790 You poor thing! Sounds like you made the right call. Just rest up and go back in if you feel like you need to.

@SunnySideUp2020 @ChampooPapi Yeah I read it and thought the same, the OP clearly was insensitive, but bloody hell some people can be HARSH with their criticism!

Not much to report from me for this week! My next scan is a week on Sunday, a private 3D one, which were really looking forward to 😍 I’m back in work today after 4 months of furlough life!! So that’s new haha. I’ve only got 10 weeks in though, before I’m off for mat leave 😂

Baby girl is deffo having a growth spurt this week! My bump has popped even more and her kicks the past couple of days are SO much harder!! They’ve never actually hurt before now, but when she kicks me in the bladder now it is SORE 😫😂 Little monkey ❤️ Did anyone else also notice their reflux kicked up a notch around now? 26+3... I’ve been popping more rennies than usual this week!

@BS9790 thinking of you. Get lots of rest while you can! Xxxxx

@BS9790 you poor thing, that sounds really stressful. I hope you can get some rest and either everything settles down or labour starts for you. Xx

@SunnySideUp2020 wow your wedding is coming up so soon..that must be very exciting! Be good to get that scan in sometime before so you can at least have that worry off your mind!!
I don't know about anterior placentas (mines posterior) but the doc said to me that it might be hard to find HB on Doppler on Monday as still early and not to worry if it took her a while..thankfully she got it immediately but even she looked surprised she got it that easily so I'd go in expecting them to have a little search for it first!

@TerribleImagination that sounds a little sore getting kicked in the bladder alright😬I can't wait to feel some kicks. I've been lying there willing them to happen but nothing yet 😄

@ChampooPapi thank you lovely for updating the list again and adding my boy!! You are doing great keeping on top of that list😊

Oh gosh @BS9790 you poor thing, what a stressful night! I think you did the right thing coming home, I hope you manage to get some rest today. Stressful but also exciting to think it hopefully won't be that long to go for you now

@ChampooPapi I am deffo treating this as a ticking off month, altho i am seeing some people i have barely seen all year hopefully (restriction dependant). Can't flipping wait to get to Christmas/Dec- brie!!! Prosecco!!! Red wine!!! Oh and baby...! i have a scan next week to see whether my fibroid has moved at all, if not I will have another in a few weeks and a c secrion booked in. Baby is breech too at the min, midwife said yesterday plus I can tell by how my stomach looks!

@TerribleImagination I'm on the rennies too! Never had a problem before ever so its very new, felt like I was going to vomit out of nowhere at one point next week. Hard kicks are weird arent they, i have had some which feels like they are kicking my bum. Very odd!

Not long till your wedding @SunnySideUp2020, exciting! We got married in October too and had such a beautiful day

@Leok83 I have a posterior placenta too and started to feel movement between 15-16 weeks. But at that stage it was verrrry subtle! Like a little fish hitting the side of a plastic bag of water! I could only feel it when I was lying on my back super still too. Then they just get stronger and stronger, it really is amazing! Although not so great when the hard bladder kicks make you think you might wee yourself immediately 😂

@Whiffle77 Haha they are so weird! Some of them I have no idea where she’s kicking, but it feels very odd! Might be my bum... or my cervix... who knows haha! Yeah I was never a regular on the Rennie’s before pregnancy either, but I’ve deffo reached the stage now where it’s touch and go whether the lovely burps we get when we’re pregnant are going to be just that, or a bit sicky 🤢😂 Such a glamorous time haha!

@Leok83 ok will go with no expectation in case she doesn't find it.
That's also why i want the scan, to feel a little lighter that day and not have those worries at the back of my head.

@BS9790
Hope you get some rest x

Finally got my date for scans
19th October for "gender scan"
And anomaly scan on 10th November
💓 can't wait!!