How long can I realistically hide this pregnancy?

[chickensoup23]

Hi! advice plz!
I'm 7 weeks pregnant, 2nd baby, at risk of redundancy and due to find out my fate early November. I'd much rather keep my job but there are some advantages to going (long service pay out etc) the scoring and selection process is quite in depth and I've done all of the pre- work for it already.
I'm really good at what I do and want the decision to be made either way based on my ability - I just don't want the conversation to come up of 'oh she's pregnant let's let her go / she's pregnant let's protect her etc' does that make sense?
I want to get my role on merit and my previous hard work record.
So my 12 week scan is 18th September. Can I realistically hide until week 18 and has anyone else done that / how did work react? Also is my plan a silly one?

Thanks in advance!!

How did you carry with your first? Could give you an indication of this pregnancy

I'm a size 12-14 and 5 foot 2 so showed really quickly! The only big advantage is because of current situation I'm working from home 3 days a week

I managed 24 weeks.

I'm roughly your size and height and I have to say I showed quickly and more so with the second.

@hopefulhalf how did work react at being told so late?

If someone asks get offended and say lockdown weight gain?

Waterfall cardigans can help hide a belly

Don't try 'pulling in' your tummy starting now, complain with eye roll about the covid weight gain...

Might buy you a couple of weeks at the end.

I think I could have realistically hidden my pregnancies until 24 weeks ish with clever clothing choices.

You do have to tell them by the 25th week though, so make sure you know that date, and do it a few days before for insurance.

I looked more bloated and pregnant almost immediately with DC 2. Had someone congratulate me at a work thing before my 12 week scan, very awkward.

@slipperywhensparticus yeah really good idea. I mean I would like to think that people wouldn't dare say to my face but I want to be prepared if I'm caught off guard! Thank you

I was visibly showing at 11 weeks with my second whereas it was more like 17 weeks with my first. My colleagues guessed before I told them and I was desperate to hide it as I'd literally only just started a new job 2 weeks before I found out I was pregnant.

@Ullupullu yeah I'm just over 7 weeks and super bloated. Can't remember at what point it turned into a 'bump'
Kicking myself for not taking any pics until the end now last time!

I don't think you'll be able to hide it without lying and breaking trust. I understand your dilemma but that's a long time to try and conceal a pregnancy especially if you are petite.

@SillyBub oh man. How did management react? I think I just overthink things too

Don’t touch your tummy! Moan about putting weight on. Open jacket, loose cardigan or shirt in similar colour to your top covers your side profile. Long scarf in the middle also helps.

It’s no ones business unless you need a pregnancy risk assessment.

It can be done, I know someone who hid it in work until month 6, and there are stories of people who didn't let on (or didn't know themselves) until the baby was on it's way out.

That said, with second+ babies it's harder. Loose dresses and cardies are best for concealing a bump, and avoid any sort of social where you might be expected to drink... You might just get away with it!

For those suggesting op should lie and say it's weight gain, how untrustworthy will she look once she does come clean?
This is assuming the employer is a reasonable one.

For entirely different reasons I 'concealed' my pregnancy at work with DC2 until about 28 weeks. My manager knew but circumstances in the team at the time meant we decided not to let the wider team know until it was unavoidable.

Was fine, just looked a bit podgy. Talked a lot about needing to stop eating pies. I wore loose fitting tops, stayed sat down a lot and avoided going out with certain colleagues for lunch if it was windy.

Once I 'came out' I suddenly looked very very pregnant overnight. It was like all the muscles suddenly went 'ahhhhhhhhh we can relax now'.

@flashbac but I think if I don't outwardly lie as in say 'no' if I'm asked - legally I'm following the rules right?

flashbac considering how women can still be discriminated against for having the temerity to be the ones to do all the work on making new humans, and the OP is trying not to let her pregnancy unduly bias an employment issue - I would have no problems with this lie. And your employer has no rights to know about a pregnancy until 24 weeks, way past the 18 she wants to do.

The excuses I came up with to not reveal my pregnancy included telling everyone I was super hungover and nauseated to excuse not drinking with meals or when out. No one thinks pregnant women hide behind over-drinking. No one had a clue.

@pastabest 28 weeks!! Wow! That's impressive

Both times I could've hid my pregnancy until around 27 weeks but I carry really small!

@elfycat yeah really good shout. Pre baby I had a very healthy (sociable) gin habit which I'm sure will help to back up some of my nausea tales!

@Mammyloveswine I remember waddling with severe SPD last time at 27 weeks - very much hoping that doesn't return!!