July Bus Graduates ❤️

[SmileyT]

Okay I'm still super nervous but time to take the plunge and started a Grad bus for the recent BFPs from the main thread. According to NHS calculator I'm due 18th March and it's #1 for me 😬

@Cocoblue22
@LittleRa
@Dipsy77
@Noble89
@Skip86

@Bl0ndi3 Sending hugs your way x

@Bl0ndi3 it's hard for men to understand because although they will be upset too they haven't yet felt a connection to the baby like we do. My DH found at the 12 week scan when he saw the baby he felt connected to him but before nothing was really very different to him so I'm guessing that's why it's harder for them to understand. Also your hormones are raging anyway so you would be emotional about things anyway. Let us know how today goes I will be thinking of you and sending you good thoughts. Remember if it is the worst news as the other ladies said it's nothing you have done and is just one of those awful things that happens (I know that won't make you feel better but try and be kind to yourself) we are all here for you x

@zippityzip that's great news about the hospital x

@Madz123 @samilicious welcome and congratulations x

@Ltay2 excellent lines! x

@Skip86 I think it's normal to feel nervous I feel nervous too. In fact having babies and children is just one continuous worry fest isn't it! X

@Ltay2 That's how my lines are looking on my cheapies so hopefully that's reassuring for you. I'm still doing them almost daily 🤦🏼‍♀️

@Bl0ndi3 Thinking of you today, hope you get the answers you need ❤️

@Skip86 I am in a permanent state of nervousness too! I'm even nervous to tell my mum today, not really to tell her as such as I know she will be excited, but just don't know what words to use. Nearly told her twice this week but chickened out as didn't want to go into her office and just blurt it out 😂 she will know something is going on as soon as I go in and close the door as we have a very much open door office environment 🙈

@zippityzip Oh good! They did actually reassure me, I was worried nothing would come up as I've never had a line before even when I did on frer!

@Bl0ndi3 good luck today ❤️ thinking of you

@SmileyT thanks for all the info around tests! Read the earlier messages and ordered some CB weeks ones. Definitely great advice on the keeping yourself busy front too - need to plan some stuff

@Cocoblue22 @Ltay2 glad it's not just me feeling nervous! So different this time compared to my MC - then I had ongoing implantation spotting for a good few days and brown tinged discharge the whole time, this time nothing like that. Don't know if it's good or bad 🤔

Also booked a scan for 6+5. I know that's earlier but miscarries at 6 last time, feel like if I get past that part I will panic less but we'll see 🤪

@Ltay2 I first tested with cheapies and they messed with my head because they were so faint! So seeing them dark and obvious now is reassuring! I think if you can get a dark line on those then you're winning! The only thing keeping me going until my scan next week.

@Ltay2 those look like lovely lines, hope it goes well with your mum today x

@Skip86 ahh I think it's normal to get a bit nervous, but I'm sure all will be fine and I'm know you're keeping yourself super busy and the scan next week will come around quickly x

@Bl0ndi3 thinking of you today x

@samilicious I had my scan booked for 7w6 (today actually) which is just after pregnancy stopped progressing last time but got impatient and moved it forward which now I'm annoyed about as I still feel a bit in limbo. It's good to have your little milestones to get us through this 8ww until the dating scan x

@SmileyT when have you booked your next scan for lovely?

@Bl0ndi3 in my thoughts today! Hoping it's some sort of good news x

@zippityzip so glad you have got the hospital such lovely news🥰

@Ltay2 good luck telling your mum today So excited/nervous for you just because you chickened out before 😂

How is everyone else doing? Also weird question but before my pee used to be bright neon yellow (because of taking the prenatal vitamins/pregnancy ones) but now it seems my pee is normal- anyone else have this? should I take this as a hopeful/good sign my body is using all the vitamins up for a growing baby?

@Ltay2 let us know how it goes telling your mum! X

@Mococo1 are you drinking a lot more? It could be that it's more dilute now I know mine is as I'm drinking more water and juice x

I had my booking appointment yesterday and had bloods done etc so now just waiting for scan appointment to come through. Thinking of booking another private scan just before that DH can come to as he won't be allowed to the nhs dating one @SmileyT you put the idea in my head haha although it will cost another £80 but it's only money I'm not bothered about the cost! X

Hi ladies, there was nothing to be seen on the scan, taken bloods again expecting to see that they've dropped and that will be the final confirmation that I have miscarried. The reality is that I knew the second I saw the blood on Tuesday and it's just been 3/4 days waiting for it to be confirmed.

I am going to take a step back from this thread for now just because, well, I am sure you know. However I do really want to keep up to date on how you are all doing so I'll check in from time to time. You have been an amazing support and seeing all your messages this morning was so lovely it means so much to me.

Xxx

@Bl0ndi3 I am gutted for you but totally understand. I really hope you're ok and have support and time to heal xxxx

@Bl0ndi3 💕

@Bl0ndi3 I'm so sorry, sending you lots of hugs and support. My heart honestly cries for you ☹️I'm glad you've been given some sort of confirmation now so that you are no longer in limbo- will they ring you today with your blood test results? Is your DH okay?x

Just know - the majority of women go on to have healthy pregnancies after 🥰 (don't let my stories scare you!) and I know this doesn't make up for your loss but just to help you feel a bit more optimistic about the future..

you have gotten pregnant once so you will again! Ive heard women are particularly fertile a couple of months after a loss so when the time comes for you to be emotionally/physically ready to try again hopefully it wont be too long a wait and you will be carrying a happy healthy bean in no time 🤞🏽fingers and toes crossed for you xxxxx

@Bl0ndi3 I'm so so sorry 💕

@Bl0ndi3 so sorry to hear that. Make sure you take all the time you need to have a break from life and work thorough all the emotions. Big hugs ❤️

@Mococo1 I wouldn't worry, think bladders do weird things at these times, or maybe just your body getting used to the vitamins? Mine is opposite - fine before and now neon and strong, even though I'm drinking more water (and taking the same vitamins)

@SmileyT yeah good point on the milestones. Trying not to wish time away because 8 weeks is a long time not to have any fun. How many weeks are you now?

Thinking of you @Bl0ndi3. Be kind to yourself and let your OH take care of you xxx

Thanks everybody, you're all such gems 💎!

I want to try again as soon as possible but I'm going to take the time it takes to get pregnant again 😭^ to look after myself, lose weight, exercise etc. I feel the loss of the pregnancy the hardest and the pain I feel that I have to try all over again is the worst because I had the positive test already^ and I don't want to have to do it all again, but I do and I have to accept that now and move forward. I am so scared it will take months and months again :(

Just spoke to work and they've said take whatever time I need which is good because I can't bare the thought of having to try and work when I feel this way at least for a little while.

@Mococo1 I'll get a call this afternoon with bloods results, if anything I hope they are super super low so the HCG is nearly all gone and things return to normal quicker so we can start trying quicker. As I believe I have to wait for my first period before trying. OH seems perfectly Okay to be honest I think he just sees it as a setback in our journey and we can try again etc. He's not a very emotional guy anyway so I think he's probably struggling to comprehend my emotions too.

@Bl0ndi3 they say to wait a cycle because sometimes it can take 4-6 weeks for your period to come back depending on your HCG levels so it's a bit harder to track ovulation and it's easier for NHS to date you as well! Tbh it's not necessary tho as I was naughty this time round and didn't wait the full cycle and fell- you will know when the times right for you to try again hun xx

I'm so glad work are being understanding you need this time off to heal ♥️ it will be tough for a while but I promise u it will get better!

@samilicious @Cocoblue22 honestly don't think im drinking anymore! Eating yet drinking no lol x

@Bl0ndi3 I'm so sorry for your loss. Time is a great healer and I know there aren't any words to quicken your healing process, but its times like these that having a great support system is wonderful. I love how supportive your employer is too! Wishing you all the best ❤️ Like others have said, we're all here for you x

@Mococo1 I'm now beginning to experience a shortness of breath. I woke up this morning and just needed MORE air! I did a quick google search (it's my first pregnancy) and saw that a shortness of breath is common. I totally didn't expect that in the first trimester. I'm thinking it could be because of the heat. I'm now cooler and feel much better. Gosh, I couldn't imagine being 9 months pregnant in this heat! Hats off to those women.

@Mococo1 I had read that but I'm thinking that I won't wait, the sooner I get pregnant again the better in my eyes. I've read up on it and there's no suggestion that there's anything bad about trying straight away just that it's easier to date same as when you come off the pill etc if you wait. We weren't actively trying before because we agreed to just let it happen naturally. That said I was tracking my cycle and OPKing occasionally in the background and then just encouraging sex when we needed to be DTD lol. When we conceived it was first month using the clearblue digi ovulation kit so I've still got lots of those left at least 🙂 I need to make sure I don't let getting pregnant again consume me though, cause that's not healthy and I'll drive OH mad.

@FairyLights2 thank you 💜 yeah they were brill and I think they'd just accept any amount of time I want off xx

Blood test results are in

HCG on Tuesday was 215
Today... 23

Shocked at how quickly they've dropped as they said they expect a 50% drop

Oh wow @Bl0ndi3. How do you feel about the levels? I know you said you'd be relieved if they were super low as it means you can start trying again quicker.
It's devastating and I can't imagine what you're going through, but like others have said, I hope you can take some solace in the fact that statistically, you're incredibly fertile immediately afterwards and likewise, it's also very uncommon for it to happen more than once. Hopefully you can recover well from this and move on to TTC again whenever you're ready. We're all rooting for you and hoping you get your rainbow baby soon!

@mrsmummy1111 I found it quite positive actually because I already knew I'd miscarried so it wasn't more bad news I suppose. Glad they're low so I don't have to wait ages for my levels to return to normal. I just want my body to go back to normal so can try again and hopefully catch again soon. 🙏🏻🌈😞

I'd love to be pregnant again before Christmas if I allow myself to hope I could catch again quick, but I know from experience it happens whenever it happens and I can't really control it so won't try to, at least not too much.

Felt physically better today so I have done a food shop earlier and then cleaned the kitchen this afternoon, I bought myself a bottle of my favourite alcoholic drink before because why not! So I am going to enjoy that tonight 🥰 it's helped to stay busy.

--

I was telling OH before how amazing you all have been perfect strangers who don't even know my name 🥰 I'm a bit gutted I can't be on this journey with you guys anymore but like I've said I'll be keeping myself in the loop with how you're all doing.