July Bus Graduates ❤️

[SmileyT]

Okay I'm still super nervous but time to take the plunge and started a Grad bus for the recent BFPs from the main thread. According to NHS calculator I'm due 18th March and it's #1 for me 😬

@Cocoblue22
@LittleRa
@Dipsy77
@Noble89
@Skip86

@Cocoblue22 That's a good point. I made it out of the car lol. I was so embarrassed I didn't think of the alternative 😂

@Bl0ndi3 Wow that really is stunning. I'm not creative enough to do anything like that but it's beautiful.

@mrsmummy1111 I don't get how people can deal with hangovers and kids! On our wedding anniversary we went for tapas, was home by 10pm and asleep before the first episode finished 😂

@SmileyT I know what I'm ordering now. I may disappear if I end up in a biscoff coma.

@Mococo1 agreed biscoff cheesecake is the best thing ever - I used to make a low cal one all the time and take it to the gym the instructors loved me 🥰

@Cocoblue22 my OH used to run a kitchen so it's definitely his domain, I reckon I've cooked twice this year 🙈 can't beat a good cheese on toast x

@Bl0ndi3 have you tried going to bed earlier? I find if I go to bed early I'm still knackered from the day, if I get into bed after 10 I almost have a second wind and struggle more to sleep 😴 never heard of numb hands but I'm sure that if you google it somebody will have had it in pregnancy 👌🏾

I'm so tired this morning after waking up at 4.30am so wish I didn't have to leave for work in less than an hour 🥱

Also, I still haven't heard from the patient coordinator from the hospital yet. I last heard from them on Monday after my first email.

When should I chase it? DH thinks leave it as being pushy may mean they just say no. But I'm conscious of the fact I'll need my booking in appointment soon.

If I sent a very nice email on Friday would that be too soon?

@SmileyT 4.30am is the middle of the night 🙁🙁🙁

@SmileyT haha, thanks ❤️

@Bl0ndi3 I LOVE your journal! So pretty.

@zippityzip bless you! Hope you're feeling better. Erm, I think you should go ahead and send that email because covid-19 has made things more complicated. As long as you come across as nice, what harm is there? Btw check your junk mail. I thought I didn't receive a mail but saw it days later in there x

We are biscoff addicts in this house too @Bl0ndi3 !! My sister makes the most insane melt in the middle biscoff cookies and she doesn't dare set foot in the house without bringing a batch with her anymore. Funnily enough we went to a dessert place on hols last night and I ended up having biscoff donuts and they were incredible!!! I'm not even sorry. Also re: the numb hands - I was much much further along but I ended up having the most annoying carpal tunnel with my son and my hands were so numb every single morning when I woke. I ended up getting wrist splints to sleep in in the end which really helped.

@zippityzip What is it you're waiting for? Just the booking appt? If so then definitely email, they can't say no! It's a standard booking appt that every pregnant woman has so they can't penalise you for chasing.

@mrsmummy1111 No the hospital I want have sent me a letter to say that I can't give birth there due to COVID they aren't taking patients out of Borough. But my only other option is the hospital where I nearly died giving birth, and then had appalling care during my second pregnancy where the baby wouldn't have made it. They dismissed me as neurotic.

Irony is, I'm actually closer to the "out of borough" hospital.

I explained why I couldn't go to the other hospital and sent them details of my complaint through PALS and they said that the clinic coordinator would let me know.

I've just sent a very polite email asking if there was any update. Honestly don't know what I'm going to do if they won't take me.

Sorry for being awol guys, we are away camping, will catch up properly when back, hope all well!! xx

@zippityzip I think it's the right thing sending a follow up email, your booking appt is anytime before the 12week scan i think? Last time mine was booked for 11weeks and I think now a lot of trusts are just doing a call and then bloods/ urine at the scan, so you still have a few weeks anyway and I think once you are registered they can just book your appt then and there anyway. Are there no other hospitals at all near you? And yes 4.30am is the middle of the night, woke up to wee and stupidly picked up my phone and then it was time to get ready for work 😴 sat at my desk now like a zombie with a sausage sandwich

@SmileyT I could murder a sausage sandwich right now. I fell asleep as 9.30pm and woke up at 5.30am. I usually have to get up at that time anyway 😔

There is another - but the reviews for antenatal are absolutely awful and it's miles away. I've heard nothing but bad experiences, and my DH had surgery there once and the whole experience was like something out of a comedy movie - so much went wrong if we didn't laugh we would have cried. They even LOST a patient on his ward while I was visiting.

In that case @zippityzip you've absolutely done the right thing by emailing. I don't think they'll say no just because you've chased them. I think any normal human being will have some empathy and understand why you're anxious to get an answer quickly. Just do what you've done, explain calmly and rationally why it's so important to you that you don't have to give birth at the other hospital - the PALS complaint helps as it shows that it's a genuine reason (not that you're trying to exaggerate just because you want this hospital) and all you can do now is wait.

Keeping fingers and toes crossed for you. It seems bizarre to me that hospitals are denying people though! I live in greater London and there's 4 hospitals really close by with maternity dept's. Most of my friends gave birth in the same hospital as me, but I know plenty of people who went to one of the other hospitals that aren't necessarily closer or anywhere near their boroughs, they just chose them and that was that. Do you have the option of any other hospitals? Even ones further away?

@mrsmummy1111 There is one other - but I have absolutely no idea what it's like. And in all honesty, I would prefer the unknown than going back to the original hospital. It's a bit of a distance but doable.

Thank you! I have emailed again this morning so will just sit tight.

@zippityzip surely they have a duty of care to make sure you're happy with the hospital you give birth at they can't make you go back to the other one if you had a bad experience surely x

@SmileyT my booking appointment is a 45 min call then I have to go to my gps straight after for measurements and bloods done that's next Thursday when I'm 8 weeks x

Hope everyone is good this morning xx

@Cocoblue22 yeah seems to be different in different areas, NHS website says anywhere between 8 and 12 weeks for booking appt but I know some have had it earlier than that aswell. Not long to wait for your booking appt then ☺️

@mrsmummy1111 I'm in Greater London too and have about 6 that I could just self-refer to within a 45min drive, but I've gone for my closest one which my friend really recommended against so could have been a terrible idea, guess I can always switch after 1st scan if I hate it x

Where abouts are you based @SmileyT if you don't mind me asking?

The hospital I gave birth at last time I thought was absolutely fantastic. It's the same one a lot of my friends gave birth in and it happens to be 3/4 mins drive from our house, which helps, but I would've chosen it even if it was a little further. Some of my NCT friends however, swore against that hospital and when I told them that's where I was giving birth they were really surprised as had heard of other people having bad experiences. I think it really is such a personal choice and you just have to go with wherever feels right for you. It helped us having a tour of the hospitals first and obviously certain hospitals are better if you want a water birth / if you're having ELCS etc so I'm sure there's positives and negatives to them all

@mrsmummy1111 I'm in Edmonton, Enfield (north London) and yeah totally agree with what you're saying two of my besties have had children over the last couple years and had unfavourable births - one had an emergency Csec end of July and said her hospital had terrible post natal ward but not sure if that's partly to do with COVID and her generally feeling emotional after the whole ordeal 🤷🏾‍♀️ It's frustrating the tours are off so I just YouTubed them and made a decision.

@zippityzip i've got to say that sausage sandwich has really set me up for the day, was hard to get down me but feel so much less sicky today because of it (sorry veggies 🙈)

@SmileyT I did that with the YouTube videos!!!

out of the two closest to me I chose the
hosp that I had a better EPU experience with and that was a lot more modern even tho it's the one that's a bit further away- modern things calm me lol

I'm still here with zero symptoms! But did call EPU just to check and they said on Tuesday my hcg levels were: 7638 (and 2 days before that I got pass the CB threshold of 2173) which seems ok for 5.5w - even if the pregnancy has stopped and HCG is the same clearly it does not seem to be affecting my body at all 😫😫 so much for reassurance symptom spotting!

I've had a long talk with DH and we've decided to pretend I'm not pregnant for the next two weeks just incase x

@Mococo1 I know this probably won't help as we can't help the way we feel, and we're often our own worst enemy. But with my son I had really strong on / off symptoms for the whole of the first trimester. I had no nausea but my boobs would be absolutely throbbing one day and the next, absolutely zero. You could've punched them and I'd have not noticed. This pregnancy looks like it's going much the same way except I've had zero symptoms so far. Not even the sore boobs. I'm just trying to keep reminding myself that every pregnancy is different, every woman is different, and no symptoms are not an indicator of a healthy pregnancy. I hope the next two weeks aren't too rough for you

@mrsmummy1111 yeah we can't! Thank you for your support though ❤️

I'm hoping in a few weeks I will miraculously get some symptoms- I've realised everything is out of my control - so I'm feeling so much more positive pretending I'm not pregnant now with DH and have messaged sisters to saying let's minimise discussions😂

On a new note so excited we are getting wagamamas tonight! It's been a long time since lockdown and I cannot wait! And tomorrow is Eid so will be having a good few days of social distance celebrations (bbq) with family and friends! X

@mrsmummy1111 @Mococo1 try not to worry my friend had twins and didn't have any symptoms until around 8-9 weeks so it's perfectly normal this early not to feel any different. I'm sure your little beans are growing just perfectly so maybe just take @SmileyTs approach and until you know any different enjoy that you are in fact very very PG (it's natural to worry we all do but try and enjoy this time and stay positive). I'm now wishing lots of nausea on you both to reassure you (I never thought I'd wish nausea for someone in a positive way haha) x

@Mococo1 @mrsmummy1111 I'm also here with no symptoms. I mean my breasts are huge and I pee a lot but that's about it! I've read there are many women who don't suffer from morning sickness and that's perfectly normal. I think because morning sickness is so commonly associated with pregnancy that you feel weird if you're not vomiting.

Here's an interesting fact that you might find reassuring: after 8 weeks, your chances of having a live baby is 92%. Fingers crossed for all us ladies that we reach the second trimester in good health ❤️

@FairyLights2 just worried as I had symptoms and they disappeared which is a major major factor!

I wish I didn't feel like this but unfortunately I've been through it so many times that I feel like I really know my body by this point

I've resigned myself to the fact that I'm not pregnant anymore as my body seems to be going back to normal (I honestly expect to bleed soon) and it's better for myself mentally to believe I've lost it (even if there's a chance I haven't which to me is unlikely) until I'm told otherwise

I walk around anxious and tense all day xx I might try staying away from mn for a while too but I won't be able to resist the urge if any symptoms do pop up x

@Mococo1 I'm so sorry, I had no idea x

I hope you have an amazing Eid tomorrow. Hopefully that'll help you to forget and if you have any time to be meditative, definitely reflect on Byron Katie's 4 questions. Through controlling our thoughts, we can have some control over our anxiety but I know that is always easier said than done.

What I found to be extremely useful for me is always asking the question: can you absolutely know it's true with certainty? Hopefully by meditating on that, the negative thoughts causing anxiety go away and you become less tense.

I completely understand if you need a break from MS. Sending you love, positivity and prayer your way x

@Mococo1 I really hope it works out for you. I know we are all strangers here but I feel like that gives us the anonymity to be frank and honest. I can't pretend to know how to feel, even remotely. I've been more than lucky in my TTC life.

Just honest to god I'm hoping for you, keeping it all crossed, and trying to send sticky bean vibes. Pretend for the next two weeks it's not happening, and let us worry on your behalf. xxx

Still nothing from the hospital 😔