November 2020 babies - thread 8!

[wannabebump]

New thread xx

@Wise0wl you might be absolutely fine to go back at 6 months, maybe even really keen! But I think definitely worth seeing how it goes. I really enjoy my job and loved returning full time after my mat leave ended, but at 6 months old my son’s sleep was so horrendous, and we’d only just started weaning and he was still on loads of breast milk (he never took a bottle so I felt like he would genuinely starve). Also he was a very clingy baby compared to others I knew and I think it would have been horrible for him. All those things could be completely different for someone else, but also I didn’t predict them at all! You have to give 8 weeks notice of intention to return I think, but best to check with your employer too.

Thanks everyone for your responses on returning to work after MAT leave. I am not committed to a return date. I'll possibly ease myself back in by doing part time for a few weeks possibly when baby is 6 months.
Not sure I want to stay with the company I'm with so may also be job hunting during maternity leave . So much to consider! x

@MrsR87 Hi, I am a teacher too but in Reception so it’s very different. I will be 29 weeks when we start back so I was planning to work in school up until half term. When my Reception and Yr 1 colleagues went back in June the school said they didn’t want me to go back in based on their risk assessment. It’s a private school so they had a very thorough online teaching schedule every day and I was in charge of doing that for the children in Reception and Yr 1 who chose to stay home. Just before the Summer holidays they said they had thought carefully and unless anything majorly changed in the guidance, they wanted me to wfh in September too. I think it’s just easier for them to plan that way as they also probably wouldn’t have given me my own Reception class for just half a term because it’s too unsettling for little ones just when they are feeling comfortable to handover. I was hoping to do cover or TA work but I think it is such a big, busy school with lots of staff that they are just being cautious, so I’m grateful for that. My only worry is what work they are going to ask me to do from home! I feel like I’m kind of at their mercy!

Also, on a side note, I went into school yesterday to collect my laptop and was chatting in the site managers office when I came over funny and fainted on his desk! They called the paramedics who checked me over and said I was fine, but it’s probably put the school off having me onsite even more!!

Has anyone else experienced actual fainting? They put it down to heat, possible dehydration...

@BG1234 sorry you fainted... I also did at 13 weeks, head butted the pavement, broke my glasses and needed my head glued in 3 places. They put it down to blood pressure/food/heat/standing too long - and apparently very common during pregnancy. Hope you're feeling ok now x

Oh you poor things @wannabebump @BG1234

I tend to faint when experiencing sharp pain... so labour is going to be fun

Yep, @wannabebump, they said similar things. Feel ok but just taking it easy today in this heat.
Poor you hitting the pavement so hard. Luckily I just kind of slumped forward onto the desk then slumped back against the wall so no injuries for me or baby.
It happened so quick too. I was feeling fine until about 10-20 seconds before, then I had this thought- I feel weird would it be rude/drama queeny to ask to sit down, followed by- nope, I definitely need to sit down, and then I was gone!

Lesson learned! Just sit down! Far more drama was caused by hesitating!

@BG1234 hopefully you feel better today and defo take it easy. I didn't know how I went down (apart from like a brick!) but I was assured by 2 sonographers, 2 midwifes, 1 A&E doctor and a triage assistant that Baby is very well protected in there so if I can say anything, it's don't worry about baby. X

@MrsR87 I work in a high school too, I'm not sure my response will be much help but thought I would share. I spoke to our vice principal in charge of HR during the last week of term and her response to me was literally 'we don't know if you can come back and will let you know closer to September'. Personally, whilst I feel guilty for leaving my team and students in the lurch, I would feel a hell of a lot worse if something happened to my baby so I'm feeling that I want to work from home.

I'm BAME and asthmatic and will be in my third trimester when term starts again, the union guidance is to stay home so I'm hoping my school will go with that. I'm 37 with an IVF pregnancy, this may be my only chance to become a mum, I'm not willing to risk it for a job (no matter how much I love my job or my sense of duty to my students). As they say, if I dropped dead tomorrow, my work place would replace me in a couple of weeks and just carry on.

[quote Pinktruffle]@MrsR87 I work in a high school too, I'm not sure my response will be much help but thought I would share. I spoke to our vice principal in charge of HR during the last week of term and her response to me was literally 'we don't know if you can come back and will let you know closer to September'. Personally, whilst I feel guilty for leaving my team and students in the lurch, I would feel a hell of a lot worse if something happened to my baby so I'm feeling that I want to work from home.

I'm BAME and asthmatic and will be in my third trimester when term starts again, the union guidance is to stay home so I'm hoping my school will go with that. I'm 37 with an IVF pregnancy, this may be my only chance to become a mum, I'm not willing to risk it for a job (no matter how much I love my job or my sense of duty to my students). As they say, if I dropped dead tomorrow, my work place would replace me in a couple of weeks and just carry on.[/quote]
I think you’ve summed it up well there. That’s exactly what my midwife said in terms of if I was in a car accident, they’d have to just get on with it until I was well enough to return. I also feel the same as you as in I’m torn between feeling guilty but weighing that up as to how I would feel if something happened to baby!

Thank you to those of you who replied about pushchairs - there's just so much to consider! I think my husband and I are going to go to John Lewis and Smyth Toys on Sunday and hopefully it will help me decide!

As for the question about teachers going back to school in September - I'm due back and I'll be 31 weeks. At the moment it has been assumed that I'll be back, as everyone is expected back to work (ie. no more shielding for anyone), but then that is to 'Covid secure workplaces', which I don't feel that schools are, due to lack of PPE, distancing etc (especially as I'm in Reception). I would really love to go back, as I miss my Reception team and the children, and the work I've done from home is all the paperwork side of the job, which I don't enjoy! But equally, I want to keep myself and bump safe. My headteacher has been fab so far and I imagine he might leave the decision up to me, so it'll be a case of seeing how things are going in a few weeks and how 'safe' it all feels by then...

I'm still furloughed (travel industry) and I'm incredibly bored and lonely now and I can see me still being in this position come October when my leave starts. I had started to see some of my family, now that has been taken away again because were in West Yorkshire. This afternoon has been really tough, not helped by the warm weather. Everything is just winding me up.

Sorry, needed the rant

@Wigglebum87 sending some hugs, it's tough times. I sympathise about still being on furlough and potentially not going back before leave kicks in - I'm in the same boat & it's a very strange feeling x

@wannabebump sending some hugs back. I miss the social bit of work and having something to focus on, I've been doing the nursery, but that's almost finished with 3 months to go, then I get the anxiety that I've finished it too soon. I think I need routine x

Can anyone else see their chest and stomach moving with their heartbeat? I feel like most of the time when I'm just sitting or lying down I can feel my heart beating quite forcefully, not necessarily fast, and it makes me whole abdomen move with my pulse.

@Addler

Can anyone else see their chest and stomach moving with their heartbeat? I feel like most of the time when I'm just sitting or lying down I can feel my heart beating quite forcefully, not necessarily fast, and it makes me whole abdomen move with my pulse.

Yup! Had this since about 14 weeks (plus thudding in my ears lol) it’s really normal 💗👏 xx

We are on 666 comments... so I just wanted to add another one 🙈

We’ve had to cancel some visits to see family because they live in West Yorkshire - it’s rubbish! Haven’t seen them since lockdown. They’re all seeing each other and don’t care about the rules, which is making it really awkward as they still think we should come 🙁

On another note, does anyone get sharp pains basically in their vagina?! I’ve heard of “fanny daggers” before but didn’t have them in my last pregnancy. It’s happens most often when I’m getting out of bed or trying to roll over (which is getting harder!)

@FlorenceFlounce thank you! It is a bit unsettling at times!

Yes @HarrietM87 I get 'fanny daggers' and have done since quite early, around 12ish weeks. I had it with DS but it came on much later with him. Extremely painful but only lasts a few seconds. Proper stops me in my tracks when it happens though. I am getting them a couple of times a week I would say.

So happy. I was lying in bed this morning with a cup of tea and bump starting making stronger movements that he’s made before. I shouted my husband, who was brushing his teeth, and he rushed over and finally managed to feel bump moving! He went on for a good five minutes! 🥰🥰🥰

@MrsR87 aww it’s lovely isn’t it?

Is it possible that my baby could be pressing/kicking my ovary btw? Very sharp pains now and then in that area which is different to ligament pain. Or could be a nerve or something. Don’t know..

Is anybody else still awake?

I am. Everything ok @Sweetpea1985?

@Pinktruffle yeah, I just cant sleep AGAIN 😫 every night I lie here waiting to go to sleep, I'm exhausted and yet I dont sleep.
And my hips are killing me, I have a pregnancy pillow and that doesnt really help.
I also want to smother my DH to get him to stop snoring!
Sorry, needed a rant

I can empathise on the not sleeping and the painful hours @Sweetpea1985. Mine get sore very quickly, even with my pregnancy pillow and I find myself shifting a lot to get comfortable. I love my sleep but I'm lucky to fall asleep before 1.30am at the moment and I cant remember the last time I had a full nights sleep.

My DH is also currently snoring but only lightly