Thread for us classed as mature pregnant ladies

[Sheera1]

Hi all. I wasn't wanted to hijack any threads on hear with specific questions, but wondered if anyone fancied a chat thread for us classed as mature mums to be? Anyone who feels they fit in that box are welcome to join.

I will start. 🌞

I am 41. I have a 10 year old ds and one mmc 3 yrs ago. New partner is reason for the gap.

I was very shocked when I found out as we had assumed that ship had sailed as no joy since mmc. Head was in that camp and was quite a shock to come out of it.

I am 13 weeks based on my scan later Friday. Awaiting NIPT results hopefully today or tomorrow. Been cautious after mmc but hard to not get so attached as the weeks go by.

My first purchase if all ok will be a pregnancy pillow.

Honestly I feel massive already. I am very overweight but was with ds and had a perfect fuss free pregnancy. This time I am so 🤢 and tired and feel just ill from 4pm onwards.

Instead of it easing up, last night I was still feeling 🤢 trying to sleep and was very uncomfortable due to feeling like my womb is massive.

Anyone else feeling like this? Goodness knows how I will be weeks from now. Eeek.

I'm doing this on my phone & it's hard work on the working memory, right ?

Thanks to the lovely comments about names. I dont like telling anyone in RL , I feel better hiding behind a screen when it comes to discussing names.

Cora is lovely porcupine. I'm a philistine evidently as did not get the cultural reference Haha. Girls names are a whole lot easier to pick from my experience. I know what you mean about liking but not being bowled over by a name ! alias Though I do like Charlie for a boy it has been vetoed . We were going to call a girl Sophia. That and Zachary are the only names we agree on.

Great news re the scans Kelpie and Dea Kelpie did you find out about the meaning of that measurement .

Good luck with the growth scans porcupine and the other lady.

I'm with you all pn the heartburn front. It's really kicked in for me at 28 weeks. It always does. I always have hairy babies but really I think that myth is a load of bollocks🤣.

alias
Try not to stress re the nursery. I'm on the pregnant in lockdown Scotland group- I swear you God the photos these mums are putting up are like something out of pinterest..

If it's any consolation our nursery is also our office. I need it for my main work and will continue to use it one day a week for my wee side hustle after the baby is born. Whilst poor DP is going to convert some of the garage into office space as an interim solution. I'm reckoning on the wee man.being in our bedroom anyway for 3-6 months so it's going to be done up but I'm unsure if will be ready prior to end August .

Finally sone very exciting news for you all. I am awaiting delivery of 6 choc and raspberry magnums tomorrow 💪🤪😅

Clarke 1 I would recommend the harmony test. For us it was worth every penny and has given peace of mind , as i just needed to know and it is more accurate than the NHS one. Only thing I'd say is you have to have enough fetal DNA in the blood sample. I had to go back for a second blood draw a week later as there was insufficient fetal DNA. It was a bit of an agonising wait- but they had enough on the 2nd draw. Lovely chance to see the baby early and film it and actually I'm really glad as my partner got to experience that (for the only time..this was in february).

We did the harmony first. But if you are 6th July hou could either resolve to do the harmony either way or wait until your results come back. But they are not as accurate as harmony they are based on your age , the NT measurement and I think poss bloods .

Yay @Kelpie123! Aw fab news it went well and baby is growing nicely  Definitely feels more real now! I wouldn't worry about the NT "The normal range of NT for 12 weeks is 1.1-3 mm" so congrats, that's perfectly normal. xx

Thank you @AliasGrape! You must be so excited to meet your little one very soon and I'm sure you'll forget about the nursery bit. It's crazy how covid has just turned everything upside down, is much prefer my DH goes out to work 😂

Good luck @footprintsintheslow for your scan tomorrow - 🤞🏼it all goes well for you. Look forward to your update.

Welcome @Clarkel1 - I'm also thinking of having the harmony test done too in addition to the nhs investigations. Even nhs tests show low risk, we have decided that being 40 we should still have the harmony test for peace of mind.

Great news @Dia12 and @ Kelpie123

@fool11 I think I'd go for the ECV first and then ELCS if that doesn't work. Really hoping she's moved though as I've psyched myself up for a vaginal birth now! Yeah, I've read similar stats about inductions increasing likelihood of EMCS or instrumental birth etc so jumping straight to ELCS makes sense to me in that situation. Hopefully the sweep works though🤞

@AliasGrape I'm lucky enough to have a spare room for the nursery (I'll be sleeping there with the baby to hopefully let DP get some sleep) but still haven't decorated it 🙄. It was painted a tasteful but rather grown up cream a couple of years ago and it just seems a waste to donut again

Arg, didn't mean to post that yet!

Seems a waste to do it again (Freudian slip??). Every now and again I look at Pinterest for artwork or murals or whatever but there just seem to be so many more practical things to think about so the walls are completely bare and the only way you'd know it was a nursery is by the cot. Ah well. Baby won't notice I'm sure!

Good luck with the scan today @footprintsintheslow!

I did the harmony test (well, I think it was called "My NIPT") It was expensive but I was just panicking about all the things that could go wrong and that seemed to minimize them to some extent..

Right, I'm off to add raspberry magnums to the shopping order..

@Kelpie123 That’s great news the scan went well! So pleased.

@Clarkel1 I’ll be honest I didn’t really know about harmony or nipt or anything like that before this thread. We just went with the nhs results which came back low risk and so we trusted those. I feel a bit anxious sometimes now as people keep saying they’re not that accurate so if I could go back I’d maybe do the harmony.

@PregnantPorcupine That sounds nice and tasteful. Neither of our bedrooms are particularly nicely decorated. I’ll be honest I’ve never given much of a shit what the house looked like always preferred to spend the money on holidays We started redoing downstairs before lockdown and the plan was get that done then start upstairs, then we were left with no floors downstairs, plastered but not painted walls, nothing up at the windows and no access to most of the kitchen or our back door for most of the lockdown, that was fun! Fortunately we’ve got that a bit straighter now although there’s still a bit to do, but the bedroom project got abandoned! They’re very dated and a bit sad looking, but I’m pretty sure the baby won’t care! I just won’t be sharing any Pinterest worthy photos anytime soon

@AliasGrape ha! Holidays sound much more fun than tastefully decorated bedrooms, I don't blame you

Good luck @footprintsintheslow for your scan today, hope it all goes well.

Glad to hear all went well @Dia12 and @ Kelpie123
I had baby's NT measured 3 times, nhs was 1.7 and then private one they measured 3x - 1.9,2.1 and 2.3.. I had a harmony test with my first (when i was 40 - mainly because the first leaflet i got from NHS was basically telling me how old i am and risk of downs at my age etc, i panicked and was so worried so like crazy was researching what test i can have) and now i had it done again at 45 with this one. We went to the Fetal Medicine center in London, 5y ago there weren't many places doing the harmony and went there again with this one. It was a day trip for us but they were brilliant, best £420 i've spent (they offer a good package, you get 10w scan, harmony test and 12w scan for that price) , obviously 10&12w scan not relevant now but i'm sure you can still do a harmony test if you want to..

@PregnantPorcupine hope your little one will turn head down..one less thing to worry about. Have you packed your hospital back yet? I'm still adding stuff, can't decide between tiny clothes, newborn or 0-3..my first was tiny and even newborn were too big for her so had to sent my husband to buy some clothes quickly for her. I might just pack all 3 sizes..bag is getting bigger and bigger (especially after i've added all the chocolates for me)

I'm also suffering from heartburn @Realladymarmalade , it's horrible, feel like my throat is on fire. Got my gp to prescribe an omeprazole, recommended by many preg ladies here on MN, it is much better than gaviscon etc..

@AliasGrape we also dont have a room/nursery for this little one, have a small 2b house, one room has my 5y old and i can't put a newborn there, she is a terrible sleeper so i would have 2kids up all night..so we are just putting the cot in our boring (as my DD said) bedroom and he will have to stay with us..planned to do a loft conversion but it won't happen now for a while. My husband spends lots of time in the garage :)

Hi all, I'm hoping I can join this thread/group and I'm not too late New to mumsnet too! I'm 39 (turn 40 in Aug) and after 2 years trying, various investigations (nothing abnormal found) and about to start IVF journey before COVID hit, we were overjoyed to find out me feeling a bit 'odd' around the time Aunt Flo was due was actually a natural pregnancy (my first)!
I've just posted on another thread for Jan 2021 babies as I had a bit of spotting/bleeding and I'm so anxious I paid for a private scan at 8+3 - all checked out and strong heartbeat. But I cannot wait for 17th July to get here for my 12 wk scan. Had mild cramping / aches most days and a bit of pink spotting Saturday 27/6 (over a week after last spotting). It's hard not to read so many bad news stories and think it will happen to you even though the private doc said the aches and pains should be considered 'normal' for me following the successful scan.
Hoping reading through this thread will offer up some support to me as an 'older' mum especially as I'm holding off telling anyone bar my (female) boss (to allow for any appointments and tears/panics I have!) until then. I know things can still go 'wrong' after 12 wks but it is the magic milestone I'm aching to reach xx

Morning! Hope everyone is ok! Lovely to hear of the good scans yesterday! Good luck to everyone today!

Need to vent a little so here goes!!! I'm coming to the end of my prescribed by hospital clexane - so have to put in a repeat prescription. Rang the GP yesterday and explained the situation to the receptionist that the hospital didn't give me a letter and I don't know if one has been sent to them by the consultant- the two things the consultant said would happen. This after i told her I that I needed to be prescribed clexane - she went quiet on the phone and then said "oh yes - yes you do!" Was pretty annoyed at that!

Anyway the receptionist said it wouldn't be a problem and to submit the repeat request. Missed a phone call this morning from the nurse practitioner at the GPs saying they need to speak to me about the request as they don't know why I want it! (Knew this was going to be a mess). So I phoned back and got a shirty response via the receptionist from the nurse practitioner saying to make sure I would be available to talk as they can't keep chasing up patients!! I'm actually livid!! 1. I'm a Mum of 8 I'm not constantly by my phone! 2. it's not my fault the NHS doctors aren't doing their job properly and it isn't my job to sort it out!!

Hi @Louscarlet sorry to hear you're having a worrying time!! Can you get another private scan to get some clarity? Xxx

@onlyreadingneverposting8 I only had my 8+3 scan a week ago so I think it might be too soon to go again (and a bit heavy on my bank balance!).
Trying to remain positive as the private doc was very reassuring - I guess as it is my first I have no idea what to expect, what is 'normal' (don't think there is such a thing as it seems everyone is different to a certain extent!) and what I should worry about.
Part of me thinks there is very little I can do about it if something were to go wrong between now and 12 wks and at least my hubby will be with me for that one.

I can't offer much comfort on your repeat prescription nightmare other than to say from my experience doctors receptionists seem to lack sympathy (some not all I hasten to add!) and I would get queried all the time on my repeat for my ulcerative colitis meds as they allowed me to get 4 mths at a time!
xx

@Louscarlet

I can sympathise with the UC meds! Our eldest son was dx with pancolitis in January. The GP has been dreadful - we ended up taking him to A&E because the GP left him with a history of 9+ weeks of bloody loose stools, 9 kg weight loss (he was only average weight for height at the start), severely anaemic (Hb 76), rushing to the toilet 8-12 times a day. She had referred him to gastro but said it would take 12 weeks. A&E immediate gave him fluids and admitted him. He's just put in for a double prescription of Octasa because they doubled his dose last week...we will see what they do with that!!

@onlyreadingneverposting8 oh bless him! I guess I'm what you might call one of the 'lucky' ones with UC. Although at first diagnosis my symptoms were pretty bad they levelled out and became very mild. I waited for a while when we started TTC and checked with my GP I could continue with the tablets (apparently only an issue if I decided to breast feed and would cause (somewhat ironically) bubba to get a runny bum!). But I decided about 6-8 mths ago to stop taking them as I didn't want any extra 'chemical' in my body. TOUCH WOOD I seem to be OK and no major flare ups. I will always just have a very sensitive tummy so watch what I eat.

Anyway, i don't want to take over this thread all about UC (sorry other posters!). Keeping everything crossed your son gets the meds/help he needs - feel free to message me privately any time about it xx

@Louscarlet - all sorts gets discussed here! You may want to contact your midwife about taking aspirin. They recommend it for autoimmune conditions and UC is definitely an autoimmune condition. And also most women over 40 get put on it.

Thanks @onlyreadingneverposting8 I'll mention it when I speak to her xx

@footprintsintheslow and @Countingblessings hope you get on well today.

@Louscarlet your situation is very similar to mine. I know this may not reassure you but I had two mmc and both were confirmed at scans where there was no heartbeat and baby only measured 6 weeks when I should’ve been about 10. This pregnancy which so far is going well I saw a heartbeat at 7 and 9 weeks and apparently that really reduces the chance of things not going well.

I also had brown spotting for the first 4 weeks of this pregnancy and there wasn’t any reason shown on scans so mw put it down to implantation and baby snuggling in. It stopped pretty much around 8 weeks.

If you’re concerned at all I wouldn’t pay privately but call your EPU as they really understand concerns around spotting and the need for reassurance. At my midwife booking appt she took it upon herself to book me a 9 week scan as she said she felt I needed the reassurance.

@onlyreadingneverposting8 that is ridiculous and so infuriating. I hope you get your prescription it’s such a shame everything is such a fight when it really doesn’t need to be that way if only people were competent doing their jobs. Why would the receptionist yesterday be able to see you needed it and yet this other person feels the need to call you up to question you why you need it - like we go around prescribing ourselves - they should check your notes and confirm with a dr rather than asking the patient ffs.

@Kelpie123 thank you so much! That is reassuring to hear. The private doc I saw (what an angel she was BTW!) said everything seemed perfect with measurements etc plus the heartbeat was just as needed, so I just have to try to relax and trust her. As I've said before and in my head constantly, anything that goes wrong now is unpreventable (but nonetheless terrifying!).
I spoke to the EPU after my first bout of spotting before I booked the private scan. They were very nice and didn't seem concerned unless it got worse or I had severe pain that couldn't be managed by a little paracetamol. I'm the last one out of all of my friends to have a baby so I'm desperate to speak to them about it but I'm making myself wait. I simply couldn't face the overwhelming joy I know they'll have for me to have to tell them I'd lost it. Hence why I found my way onto here - just to be able to share what I'm going through and calm any nerves pre-12 wks!). xx

Hi everyone I've just had the scan and all was well. They've moved me on a week so due 10th Jan now. It's all action stations now whilst they try and get me the dating scan moved so I'm in the correct window. So I'm back for a scan now in two days.

I'm in Wales so if we are high risk from the 12 week scan they send us for a NIPT test on the nhs so I'm happy to go that route.

As for nursery decorating we are in a two bedroom house so my two year old inherited her elder sisters room who is 20 and now living at uni, which is done up in (I think) quite funky dandelion wallpaper but it certainly isn't your normal nursery look but I think it's nice. Picture below...

Then the new baby will be in with us realistically till about 7-8 months and then they'll have to share. I'm sure it'll get decorated eventually but the Sanderson wallpaper cost a fortune at the time so I want to get my monies worth first.

Hope everyone is having a positive day.

@Kelpie123 I strongly suspect the receptionist had no idea and just said put the request in rather than actually finding out if it actually was ok. Still haven't had a call back despite the shirty " you will be available to speak, won't you?" Comment.

@Louscarlet welcome along. I've just been to the early pregnancy unit (EPU) and have been sat chatting to a mam who is bleeding and when she came out from the scan all was well with the pregnancy. Get your midwife or gp to get you an appointment or in my area you can self refer in.
Tell them it's got worse if you have to or say you have cramps. I'm not suggesting you lie but don't be backwards in coming forwards. X

@footprintsintheslow good news - sorry they moved you back a week. I got moved 4 days with this one and a whole week with one of my others. I had to do week 9.5 - 10.5 twice ... it was horrid!!

I think I've been moved on in the other direction. I went in at 11 weeks and came out 12 +2. So I'm happy!