November 2020 Babies - Thread 4

[Sakura54]

Another new thread for the Nov mums to continue our discussion. It’s nearly time for our dating scans!

Good luck for all today's scans!

I’m on a real downer today and cant stop crying. Just feel like we are never going to be out of this situation and I miss normal life so so much.

The pressure of having to work (am back at work after 5 weeks off due to MS) from home and worrying about my job (our place has said they are not looking to make redundancies, furlough or cut salaries but obviously they can’t promise what happens long term) as though I’m a lawyer I no longer earn fees and instead am an overhead, and looking after DC too (we are sharing the load as DH has to WFH too) is just getting to me. My parents haven’t seen DC since Christmas and god knows when they will be able to.

I’m sorry to be this way. It’s just so tough. I know it’s not personal to me and is tough fir everyone but it doesn’t really help. I’m also worried about my whole maternity leave potentially being in lockdown if they can’t get a hold of this thing.

I do suffer from mental health problems on and off and they tend to be situational bouts (I.e. a reaction to an event rather than a chemical thing) and my way of dealing used to be running/exercise but as I’ve not exercised in ages and am now pregnant I just can’t start that up.

I don’t know what the answer is

@burntpinky dont you worry about feeling this way. Its completely normal to be unsure in a situation like this. I cant think of a time where we've had to lockdown like this and with the worries and stresses of pregnancy as well as all the other stresses and worries it is not surprising you are feeling uneasy! Just take each day as it comes and if you need to talk on here then feel free

Hi all, I am due around the 14th of November and have my dating scan next week. however, I will only be 11+4. I have told them that I won't be 12 weeks yet and tried to change my appointment to the week after but they have asked me to go in anyway, if they can't do the tests then I will have to go back again.

Has this happened to anyone before? I'm just worried that they will tell me the baby is too small for the tests which will make me worry. I had an early scan at my local EPU when I was 7 +3 weeks so my date should be correct, unless they dated me far off

Hope everyone's scan appointments goes well!!!

@MissingMo thank you x

My scan went perfectly, thanks everyone! Measuring exactly 10 weeks which I knew due to long cycles so booked in for another scan on 4th May as a proper 12 week one. Over the moon! A very wriggly baby ❤️

Great news @bluebell94 x

Just had my scan it went well. Only issue is they couldn’t get the nt measurement as baby refused to turn even with all the wiggling they had me doing so I have to go for a blood test at 16 weeks instead. Has anyone had this before?

I’m measuring at 13w so a bit further on than I thought. I’m so happy now that it’s done as I was convinced they weren’t going to find anything.

I mean nuchal translucency

@bluebell94 @SMcG1 so pleased to hear your scans went well x

Thanks everyone for all the info regarding the Harmony tests very helpful I'm gonna ask me the midwife about it all to see if she thinks I should get them or not when I have my booking appointment 😊

Congrats to everyone so far with the great scans I'm delighted for yous and fingers crossed everyone gets good news today you all deserve it 😊

@SMcG1 glad it went well! Not had the 16 week test before but hopefully someone who has will be along x

So glad to hear about the good scans this morning @bluebell94 and @SMcG1

I’m starting to get the twitchy anxiety now! Urgh and I want more than one child, the anxiety will kill me 😂

@JM0934 the tests can be done between 10 and 13+6 weeks - 12 weeks is just the midpoint, so you have no need to worry! I’ll be over 13 weeks by the time I have mine so just enjoy the fact you get to see your baby earlier!

@SMcG1 the 16 week test is called the quadruple test - I think it may be a bit less accurate than the combined screening but hopefully if they have your bloods from this time plus that test it will give a good result.

Sorry to hear that @burntpinky I know those feelings well. I went to bed for 3 days a few weeks ago as I just couldn’t cope. What other self care could you try when your usual strategies aren’t available? Nice bath, long walk, watch something cathartic?

@bluebell94 @SMcG1 great news on your scans x

@BuffaloCauliflower thank you. Yes, I’ve decided to go for a walk this afternoon. DH pushing me to take DC but I really need to clear my head so might get him to drop me somewhere and I’ll walk back. Might have a bath also. Am not working today so going to try best to get out as not left house other than for medical appointments in last 5 weeks which I think must be contributing, that and the never ending pile of laundry

@HarrietM87 thank you they told me they are able to do the tests as long as I’m over 11+2 weeks so I’m hoping everything will be fine!

@burntpinky sorry you’re feeling low. I’m stressed out about job uncertainty at the moment. I’m a fee earner and have been working full time from home (through some horrendous nausea which has been grim) so work don’t know yet. They’re reducing our hours and pay in response to covid for the exact period that is used the calculate my maternity entitlement, but they’ve said it won’t affect “benefit accrual” so unclear whether that will be impacted or not, and I can’t ask yet obviously! I’m completely self isolating due to the medication I’m on so other than hospital appts haven’t been out in 6 weeks now either and have another 6 weeks left at least. It’s so hard when you feel sick and tired and have to keep going for the sake of your other children. It was my DS’s birthday recently and I felt like he had such a rubbish day (though he didn’t really know). Just have to hope we have some semblance of normal by the time the babies arrive.

Good luck for all those having scans today.

@burntpinky I have been feeling very down. HG means I am in bed a lot, on my own whilst my DH looks after DS. Which I am thankful for. But I have had a few cries, particularly about not seeing my parents. I had to tell my mum about being pregnant over the phone which I was sad about.

I also usually run as well and I am gutted not to be doing that at the moment. One of the hardest things about my last pregnancy was being too ill to run. I just feel so miserable that I am so early and have so long to go still.

Sorry for the long reply but your post really resonated with me. I am really ready to get back to normal life and I just cannot see when we will.

@HarrietM87 My firm have announced they're doing this and I've just asked the question about the impact on my maternity pay as I'm concerned it'll affect the enhanced pay bit.

@jeleigh hello! Is baby your first? I am in London, how about you? Have you had your first scan yet, sorry if you’ve said all this already but this thread has moved too fast for me!

Anyone missing having a drink in this sunshine? My husband bought me a bottle of seedlip alcohol free gin which amazingly hits the spot on a sunny evening!

I’ve also found it impossible to give up a daily coffee. I just need something after lunch to keep me going - my 2.5 year old is very busy!

Sorry for everyone feeling anxious about job security. Really is such a strange time...
Anyone else here self employed?

@HarrietM87 I honestly don’t know how you can fee earn when you feel so rubbish so hats off to you. It’s such a worry re job security hey? I really hope your benefits aren’t impacted. Will you tell work shortly? I bet your son still loved his birthday xx I switched from fee earning 4 years ago as I had just had enough but at the time I worked for a firm who almost pushed me into a breakdown I worked so hard whereas where I work now is great. So toying with going back as a fee earner at some point.

@FilthyforFirth so sorry you’re feeling down too and am not surprised with HG. I feel bad enough with just the nausea and the odd puke so god knows how you’re feeling. Must be so hard not to be able to run when you’re used to it too. One of my friends has 3 kids and she said she doesn’t know how she’d cope without her running.

I just reached v low point as DC been up since 615 and wouldn’t go down for a morning nap. After battling to try and get him down for over an hour I gave up and brought him downstairs by which point, DH has gone out to do the shopping. DC started whinging and being really grumpy and I just broke down sobbing as I had been with him all morning since 615 so DH could work and just wanted half an hour to watch a programme. Then my sobbing (it was a bad one) made DC cry so I felt really bad and comforted him but of course it meant squashing how I was feeling so as not to upset him. DH has just come back, thankfully with loads of nice treats, and has him in the kitchen giving him his lunch and will try to get him down this pm.

I’ve stopped sobbing now but o swear I felt baby kick whilst I was upset. So I’ve upset both my kids!!!