The Graduates of TTC after pregnancy loss thread #6 - 🐧 The Penguin Huddle 🐧

[KnitKitty]

This is a safe space and supportive thread for anyone who is pregnant following a loss. We all understand the worry and anxiety that can come from being pregnant again following miscarriage/stillbirth.

Please feel free to join, even if you were not on the original TTC thread.

Starting the roll call copied from the last thread. Not everyone is on there, so please add to it/update/edit.
Also, thought it might be fun if we add Girl/Boy/Surprise on there too, so we can see who's expecting what

@Amanda81, 38, EDD 27/12/19
@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue, 37, EDD 03/01/20
@Laney79, 40, EDD 06/01/20
@Bluebelltulip, 29, EDD 09/01/20
@KnitKitty, 32, EDD 29/01/20 - Girl
@UnicornsandRainsbows1, 29, EDD 29/01/2020
@Newbie21, 38, EDD 06/02/20
@InDreamland, 39, EDD 18/02/20
@Tina363,29, EDD 26/02/20
@Frillyfarmer, 29, EDD 28/02/20
@Strawberry, 28, EDD 08/03/20
@Ginmonkey84, 34, EDD 16/03/20
@DuvetCaterpillar, 34, EDD 27/03/2020
@ChikiTIKI , 29, EDD 04/04/2020
@Navy123, 29, EDD 10/04/20
@Catconfusion, 40, EDD 12/04/20
@Janey15, 34, EDD 13/04/20
@TinyPaws, 33, EDD 18/04/20
@Flyfisherlady, 37, Edd 24/04/20
@Dimblebimble, 29, EDD 29/4/20
@FirstTimeMama91, 28, EDD 06/05/2020
@SunshineCrocodile, 37, EDD 4/6/2020
@TwittleBee , 25, EDD 25/06/20

And a shout-out to the Mamas who have already had their beautiful babas!
@Boboelephant, @Yukka, @Melpops36, @Beaglemum93 and a special mention for our hero mum @Squiff70 who we continue to keep in our thoughts and prayers.

Shamelessly checking for @InDreamLand updates!!! Hope this means you're in labour lovely. Thinking of you and hoping all going smoothly xxx

Hope all is ok @InDreamland!

Another one checking in for @InDreamland - hope everything is well xx

Never checked a thread so much. Sending love to @InDreamland 💛

@ChikiTIKI same here! Hope it's all going well @InDreamland Thinking of you! Xx

Looks like we're all checking in hoping for updates x. Thinking of you @InDreamland

Also checking in and hoping you have your baby in your arms by now @InDreamland! We are all routing for you! X

Had my 36 week growth scan today. I was hoping baby boy was up from 34%, but instead he has dropped down to 25% :(. He was weighing 4 lbs 12 ounces two weeks ago and is now weighing 5 lbs 9 ounces. Again, sonographer wouldn't take my concerns seriously - apparently it only matters if they are below 10%? So I don't have any future scans scheduled and not likely to get any, unless fundal measurements start dropping (I was measuring 35 cm today for 36 weeks). Also, they refused to do a group B strep test, so will have to organise it myself. What do you ladies think about this? Blood flow, etc., looked fine and my blood pressure is low/urine clear. They just think he is on the small side, but that's all. I just can't stop worrying about IUGR and other things! Any advice?

@InDreamland hope it’s all going well, look forward to hearing your update.
@sadtoday21 I understand the anxiety but remember baby will have growth spurts and if there was even a tiny bit of concern they would have you in again next week. If placenta is functioning well that’s really good. Also the scans become inaccurate especially as every sonographer measures differently. I’m no expert but the estimated weight sounds good for that gestation. You could call your midwife and discuss your concerns for reassurance? These final weeks are hard! I don’t know about the strep b test but if it will give you some reassurance it sounds worth going privately? I think you said it wasn’t much money. The main thing is for you to feel reassured that baby is doing well.

I got two high blood sugar readings today and it makes me feel like I’m hurting baby because I know they absorb the excess glucose. I know it’s hormones and not my diet but it’s so disheartening. @Rubyroost how are you getting on with yours?

@sadtoday21 I did the strep b test in first pregnancy I got the kit delivered free then posted it off with a cheque was really easy to do can't remember the name of the company but would recommend doing it.

@sadtoday21 my boy was on the 70th percentile around 20 weeks, but according to scans (extra private ones) was then 50th centile, but was born at 42 weeks at 36th centile-8 lb. Sounds like your baby is growing okay. I wouldn't worry too much about strep b, it's something that I never even thought of to be honest. Apparently 25% of women have it, what happens if you have it? Will that change the way they deal with your birth etc? My friend had it and was worried, she had a vaginal birth and baby was fine.

@Mistymeow I'm sorry you've had high readings, it makes you feel so bad and guilty. I thought I might get away with some mash but my reading was 7.9 an hour after dinner and I had a reading of 7.8 an hour after breakfast last week after having one piece of wholemeal bread after breakfast. I felt both were too high. So I now eat a carb free breakfast. Seems I tolerate couscous well for lunch and can handle a slice of wholemeal bread for lunch too. I darent have two! Then brown rice for dinner most nights. Boring I know, but I know that's what my body can handle. My fasting levels have been 4.9-5.1 this week and after food lunch is around 5.5 and then after dinner is around 6.4. I always test an hour after. So the metaformin and me limiting my carb intake somewhat seems to be working.
But I feel that I have to act quick and have no room for error as baby was measuring so large and the polyhydriamnos.

Strep B is what caused the infection in Roy which led to sepsis and his death. So I do think it's worth testing for it. I dont want to scare everyone about it. But if it is known about then they can prevent that risk of infection by managing your birth differently, as soon as your waters break / you begin to labour you'll be given IV antibiotics.

@Twittlebee gosh that's awful, i didn't know that. I have to admit I don't know much about it, I've read that 25% of women have it so I thought it was pretty normal. Its annoying that the nhs don't routinely test for strep b and gestational diabetes when it appears many do.

Many countries that is

@TwittleBee Why don't they include strep B in the testing that they do? It just doesn't make sense to me.

I never expect people to know who I am outside of MN so don't worry! On your fb post about your work I was the second person to post a comment, if you want to work out which one I am 😉 My name starts with L! What's the latest with your work situation?

20 week scan day today! I can't believe it's finally here but I'm so nervous they will say something is wrong. I have been thinking it's a boy but had a dream two nights ago it's a girl. Hopefully they won't have their legs crossed and I'll find out! It means a lot finding out as I never knew what my two babies were that I lost. Also have to go to the hospital early as I knocked my bump last night and now need the anti-D injection 🙈

This website is brilliant gbss.org.uk/ source for GBS info. I think its not tested for because for many babies it doesnt effect them. The NHS cannot afford to do every test either. But also you can be positive one week but negative the next etc.

Ah I'll be able to work you out now @RedRobin7 ! Regarding work, I've sought legal advice and they're interested in taking up my case so clearly discrimination going on there. I dont want to go down that route but I hope just to give them a shake up so they see its wrong

Not been here for ages. Lovely to see wine babies and good luck I. Dreamland.
Step B is a funny one. Most of us will have it at some point but it comes and goes. For example you can have it on Friday but it’s fine by Saturday and back again Monday. If you are positive in labour day you have to have IV antibiotics. This can bring its own issues. Then you have to stay in hospital fir monitoring for at least 24 hours afterwards. For most women step B won’t cause any issues in the baby. It’s rare that it does. Sadly when it does it’s ideally very bad news. The NHS feel that IV antibiotics to every women who tests positive in their pregnancy is too expensive and unnecessary. Particularly with their worries about super bugs.
I’m not sure where I stand on this. I’ve tested positive twice. This is how to get a free test if you want one. Ignore this if you think it’s immoral! Go to docs a complain of suspected thrush or general itching and say you’re worried about an infection. They will swan you and look for step b.
Good luck all xxx

Wine babies!! More not wine

Not ideally bad news I meant really

Sorry that this is what Roy had. Absolutely heartbreaking. You will automatically get the IV antibiotics if you have had a baby with step b before. Sending love xx

@Twittlebee I'm so so sorry if my post upset you, I didn't realise that Roy had GBS. Thank you for your advice and for posting the link. I will definitely be getting the test and I also don't understand why the NHS doesn't offer it.

I really love the NHS, but I do feel that the midwives sometimes downplay my concerns as "its something so rare, it won't happen to you." The last pregnancy when they said that I trusted them (it was my first) and then it was really shocking that actually I was in the .5% of something rare but bad happening and I would have rather been prepared and monitoring the situation than thinking everything was fine. It's my health and my baby and I don't want to assume its all fine when there are simple and inexpensive tests that can tell me one way or another. I understand the results can change at any time, but its still better than not monitoring at all imho.

@Melpops36 that's good advice, thanks! I tried telling them I had some discharge, but they still wouldn't organise the strep B test for me. So I think I will have to order it online (do you know which one is best?). It's only 35 pounds or so. I was more concerned about doing the swabs, but the midwife said she would do them for me if I bought the kit and brought it in to my next appointment. Do you only get antibiotics if you test positive? Otherwise, they just take the risk that you may or may not have it? It looks like I will have a vaginal birth (baby wasn't breech yesterday and is low down in my pelvis), so I'm wondering about this whole antibiotics when your waters break thing (midwife suggested I didn't need the test because they would give me antibiotics anyway if waters break, but I don't think that's always the case?). I'm just confused about why they think I don't need the test.

@Rubyroost thanks for your comments on the growth scan, I really hope that all is ok. The glucose monitoring and diet sounds really tough - I'm a vegetarian and probably wouldn't survive without any carbs. Plus the thought of meat in pregnancy is even worse than normal. Good though that the diet and medication seems to be working for now!

@RedRobin7 good luck for your scan today!! I hope all goes well and you find out what you are having! Xxx

Thanks @ChikiTIKI! I think I will do it, just hope it won't be too late at 38+5 weeks! (that's when the midwife said she will do the swabs).

@Mistymeow you are right, I'm trying not to worry, just wish he were average rather than on the small side. I know its hard because you have the opposite worry! I don't feel that my bump is small or that I'm eating poorly, my weight also seems very average, so not sure what I can do about it. We all worry about something I guess! I'm sorry you are struggling with the glucose levels, but please remember you are not to blame! It's so hard in late pregnancy in particular to follow a strict diet - you just feel so tired and blah already. You are doing amazingly well and with the monitoring it will all be under control!

I know I'm starting to seem like the crazy one on this thread, but one other thing that has me worried and I wanted to know if anyone else has thought of this. All my family will be coming to see the baby between 2-4 weeks after birth and they are coming from long-haul overseas fights (8+ hrs) into LHR. With the coronavirus and sickness in general, I'm a bit worried about them all meeting baby after traveling and getting off a long flight. I'll ask them to wash hands, etc., but is there anything else I can do?

@sadtoday21 coronavirus worries me a bit too. 😬🙄 Really wouldn't like to get it when pregnant, although I know it's unlikely. But what will happen over the coming months? I wouldn't want a young baby getting it either.

Do you get antibiotics during labour for a particular reason or is your midwife saying everyone gets it?

You're making me think I should have this swab now! I'll be having a c section, but with all this excess water and huge baby it's possible my waters could break and I could go into premature labour. Fingers crossed scan shows my waters have either gone down, or aat least not increased, though I'm feeling more and more swollen.

@Mistymeow all that talk of how well I was doing. Got fasting of 5.6 when I woke up today 😭 it's now decreased to 5.4. I ate late last night (was 6.7 after an hour which is high for me) so now worrying my sugars been high all night.

@Rubyroost at the risk of sounding like a complete worrier, the thought of this virus going on for months and months really distresses me. I was already worried about all these health issues, and this just seems like the final straw. There have even been some suspected cases tested at the hospital where I am giving birth! And everyone just goes around touching all the public surfaces and shaking hands like normal - I'm becoming a bit obsessed with purrell as a result. Worse is the thought of my family coming from overseas flights and not taking proper sanitary precautions like I would. I honestly wouldn't worry so much normally, but the baby would be very young and not have proper immune system up and running and no one knows yet how the virus impacts pregnant women/babies.

@Rubyroost forgot to add that I wouldn't be getting antibiotics for any particular reason - the midwife wasn't clear about the circumstances under which I would get them (but my sense is only if the waters break too soon and I haven't gone into labour right away because of risk of infection in general, not just strep b).

yeah that is part of the birth plan in place @Melpops36 thankfully. I do just wish that they had given us those antibiotics straight away when my waters went with Roy (considering DS1 had sepsis post birth too, although we dont know why as they never investigated why!)

you didnt, dont worry @sadtoday21 - it is an important discussion that we all have and I am keen to raise awareness on it. I think that it was so bad for Roy because he was born at 28 weeks, maybe if he was born at term it would have been different.

Tbh I think that would worry me too regarding visiting family in those circumstances. Hand washing is all they can really do and if they have any cold symptoms etc, then obviously tell them to stay away.

@Rubyroost if your waters break pre term you get given oral antibiotics but they are not effective against Strep B and there is some evidence emerging that really you need IV antibiotics to fight an infection that is already there. Oral is more preventative against infection. Personally, I think it is worth getting the test but then with my history I would think that as I have been exposed to the lower stats