Pregnancy anxiety support thread

[Kate3150]

Hey,

I thought it would be nice to set up a group for those suffering with anxiety at whatever stage of pregnancy.
I’m approaching 14 weeks and my anxiety has been up and down, particularly as I had a loss last year.
I’m currently having therapy and trying to stay active. Eating and drinking well...

Any tips/thoughts/rants welcome. xx

[ChickenNugget86]

@Kate3150 @Kate3150

Thanks both for the comments. I am doing ok, it's only been a week since I've found out and had so many different emotions going on.

I'm a hypothetical worrier so worry about most things every day. I've used CBT techniques to help me over the years. Some days I'll be sitting quite comfortably relaxing then out of now where will think something like 'if I drive tomorrow ill crash' its so bizarre at times. I've learnt how to deal with it though.

Ive always worried about having children and knew that if I did get pregnant one day it would mentally be a challenge. Again I've already predicted how I'll be feeling which is annoying!

Roughly I have therapy every 2-3 years, when I feel like I'm struggling I go to the gp fill out those mental health score cards then wait for the appointment phone call. 10 years ago you could see a therapist within about 8 weeks now you are looking at 9 months.... I was told last time that if you are pregnant you get seen much quicker and that there are mental health midwifes.

My first midwife appointment is at the end of September. I am due to see my gp next week (have a yearly checkup to check my blood, blood pressure etc... After mum's sudden death) so I will mention how I feel mentally.

[ChickenNugget86]

@leomama81
^

Tagged the same namee twice oopps

[RC1985]

Hello Ladies, I am so glad I’ve come across this thread. I am driving myself crazy with worry, I constantly think I’m going to have a miscarriage or that my baby has already died and at my scan in 2 weeks I’ll find out or it’s ectopic or a molar. I’m 10+5 and I think I feel this way because it’s taken 19 months to conceive so I’ve waited a while. It’s nice to know you are not alone and there’s people to talk to as we haven’t told anyone yet and don’t want to until after the scan.

[Kate3150]

@RC1985- Welcome and congratulations!!! Lots of support to be found on here 💜
I think anxiety and worry notches up even more if the journey to becoming pregnant has been difficult.
It’s a scary, unknown time and one of the biggest obstacles I’ve found is not having any control. I can do my best in terms of taking care of myself but the rest is out of my hands. To be honest I wouldn’t have told anyone if I could have got away with it 😂. But obviously the further you get along it’s virtually impossible to disguise...
I had the exact same thoughts before my first scan! You’re not alone and like you say this thread has been great as don’t feel so alone with these thoughts and feelings xx

[RC1985]

@kate3150 thank you for your comforting words. Did you feel better after your scan? These next 2 weeks are going to be agonising. It’s not been easy keeping it from people, last week we were on holiday with OH’s sister and I felt so ill and drained she asked if everything was ok and thought I needed to see a dactor. I’m meant to be at a party tonight but I’m not going as I know I’ll be questioned on why I’m not drinking as people know we were trying. Bring on the scan! I am really hoping my worries do go away after the scan though, all these what if scenarios are driving me insane and worse when I’m not at work.

[Kate3150]

@RC1985- The first scan is just surreal, I remember going into mine with no expectations thinking what will be will be. Then I saw my gorgeous little boy wriggling around it was amazing! Im sure all will be fine and you’ll be gushing over your scan pic before you know it.
Each milestone feels like a lifetime away but the weeks do go by quite quickly! Are you quite an anxious person anyway?? I am, so knew that having a little bubba would intensify it. But I’m doing my best- he’s being fed well and I’m doing the best I can. The fact we care so much about them already means we’re pretty fab Mammas to be 😉 xx

[leomama81]

It's definitely much better after your first scan @RC1985. A) because there's less risk as you go on and b) because you actually know it's in there and doing ok!
I found the first trimester really weird and sometimes wasn't even sure if I was pregnant at all - it is strange that basically you pee on a stick and then feel rubbish but no medical person has verified anything. I was totally expecting that I might get to the scan and they'd say there was nothing there.

I'm sure everything will be fine and seeing that baby wriggling away on the monitor will help the anxiety a lot.

[RC1985]

That’s reassuring @Kate3150 and @leomama81

Yes I am a born worrier so it probably doesn’t help, nor does the fact my aunty had a molar pregnancy. Or me googling things, doesn’t help the stress levels lol.

[Greymoon2016]

Hi can I join I'm 37 and 26 weeks pregnant and anxious this is my 6th pregnancy but third child so I've also lost three and I'm just super concerned something will go wrong. I'm coping mostly then something will happen and I'll have a meltdown today for instance I have been using my husband treadmill to help keep my weight in check but I felt funny after and started to really panic almost into a panic attack.
I've had one other panic attack a few weeks back I had really bad stomach pains and indigestion which caused pain in chest and heart palpitations and I freaked so badly I couldn't calm myself down as it was the middle of the night was awful.

It seems once the panic sets in I struggle to control it as my head goes into I'm hurting this tiny baby and my normal breathing and meditation stuff goes out the window because the reality is this baby is so super important and the idea I could hurt the little one sends me over the edge x

I've seen the mental health people Thursday just gone but because apart from the one freak out before today I'm coping well their happy. My other issues I discussed were my anxieties around another c section I've had two one emergency and one planned so I don't think they are out of the ordinary concerns but when you have an anxiety disorder you question if what your thinking is reasonable or a sign things arent great again.

Sorry for my ramble

[Kate3150]

@Greymoon2016- of course you can join! Welcome my lovely and congratulations on your pregnancy.
Do not apologise for rambling, this page is for support and venting how you feel. You’re free to talk as little or as much as you’d like 💜.
I’m one week behind you and can completely relate to how you’re feeling. I thought I’d be ok once I’d had the 12 week scan but nope! It seems each milestone I reach there’s a new thing to worry about.
I also completely get worrying about how little bubs is doing... but then I kind of flip that and think we’re pretty amazing to already be worrying about them and they’re not even here!!!
Are you having any counselling? I’ve been seeing a therapist for a couple of months now. It’s a nice outlet each week just to chat about how the weeks been, how I’m feeling etc xx

[Kate3150]

@RC1985- step away from Google!!!!!!!
I cannot tell you how many miserable/upset nights I’ve had because of Dr Google!!! You will never get a concrete answer and for someone with anxiety/worry tendencies it just exasperates these feelings and makes things worse.
How have you been this weekend? I’ve got a midwife appt in the week, I know it’s silly but I always get nervous about having my blood pressure taken 🥴, even though it’s always fine!!!!! Oh the joys of being a worrier ha ha x

[leomama81]

Yes Dr Google is really best avoided! Though I can talk - I spent a weekend in floods of tears because I was convinced I had got listeriosis, from some pesto of all things 🤦‍♀️

[leomama81]

And welcome @Greymoon2016! I'm a week ahead of you.

One thing that also helps me with worrying about the baby is remembering that they are viable now? It doesn't stop it completely obviously but it is good to know that if something did start to go wrong we could go straight to the hospital and they could deliver if necessary.

[RC1985]

@Kate3150 and @leomama81I am stepping away from Google, it’s not good. Have felt sick all day today so not a good day however I did tell my mum and this has made me feel better as I can talk to someone about it.

[Kate3150]

@RC1985- Good good 💜 that’s a huge step in the right direction so well done.
Ahhh how did your Mum react, I’m sure that will also ease the anxiety slightly by having someone to talk to. You know you’ve got us ladies on here as-well 😉 xx

[RC1985]

@Kate3150 she was happy and said she couldn’t believe I’d kept it to myself for 11 weeks! It’s good to know I can talk to everyone on here too. Morning sickness has come back with avengance this week. Feeling rubbish 😞

[Kate3150]

How’s everyone doing!? Bit of a crap week for me 😥. Been worrying about blood pressure as it’s gone up a bit from last time. Also developed some back pain yesterday so all sorts have been going through my mind and can’t relax about that. I just thought getting to like 26 weeks I’d be totally chilled and relaxed- how’s everyone else doing? X

[RC1985]

@Kate3150 sorry you’re feeling that way, have you expressed your feelings to your midwife? I had an awful week of morning sickness last week, and last few days I’ve beeb getting mild cramps which sent me into a worried panic but I think it’s just my uterus expanding. We told other half’s sister yesterday and she was thrilled. But not telling anyone else now until scan.

[Kate3150]

@RC1985- Bless your heart, sounds like you’ve had a rough week. I feel like an idiot for moaning sometimes as I cannot imagine what it’s like having all the physical upheaval of pregnancy. Any little symptom I get I go into panic mode!
To be honest I’m not sure what they could do to help. I don’t want to start any medication as I wasn’t on any before. I’m already having counselling. So think it’s a case of getting on with it and having the odd moan on here 😂 xx

[Kate3150]

Also the blood pressure thing, it was still within a normal range but higher than it’s been. I’ve been reassured before thinking well at least my anxiety is not effecting my blood pressure. Now I’ve got it in my head that it is, so feeling more pressure on myself to keep a lid on the anxiety.

[RC1985]

Hi @Kate3150 sorry didn’t reply yesterday. Are you feeling any better today? Our minds are so bad at making us anxious, it’s difficult to get those thoughts out your head. I find breathing techniques can work sometimes.

And you’re not an idiot, it may have been you were anxious about your blood pressure being taken and that’s what raised it slightly.

As my scan is in a week, I’m now getting anxious that I’m going to be told I’ve had an MMC. Really praying everything is going to be ok. I can’t be happy or excited until then.

[Kate3150]

@RC1985- Yep that’s exactly what I was worrying about at your stage. I kept saying to my Husband, don’t get too excited you don’t know what they’ll find. Feel terrible looking back as again I robbed myself of that joy but hey ho. I’m still falling into that trap now at times.
I’m not doing too bad today actually... my back pain has gone. Think that was a result of walking a lot over 3 days and not having much rest in between. The blood pressure thing I still can’t get my head around as it was at its lowest when I felt my anxiety was as it’s worst, so I’m going to try and move past that now.
Just a case of getting through the next 12 weeks 6 days 😂 xx

[RC1985]

You haven’t got long left and it’ll fly by, then you’ll wonder what all the fuss was about (we’ll heres hoping) although I think some of us are just born worriers and the worrying will never stop! I think I need to chill out lol.

[Kate3150]

@RC1985- I know I remember reading about women on here who were at my stage and wishing I was them. Now I’m reading women who are approaching due date and wishing I was them lol it’s such a funny old time!!! How has your sickness been? Are you planning on telling people after the scan or hold on for a while longer? X

[RC1985]

@Kate3150 I bet I’ll be the same as you. Sickness not as bad this week. I think we’re going to see what happens at the scan and then decide. My mum is getting excited lol, told me she’s finding it hard to keep it a secret.