How the hell am I going to tell them I'm pregnant now?

[Whydoitorturemyselflikethis]

Have NC'd but been here for a few years.

I'm pregnant, 33 weeks, second child. First child is 2, I was really young when I had them. I live at the other end of the country from my family who I see maybe every four/five months, sometimes more and sometimes less. I was with them for Christmas and hid my pregnancy. They were just so negative with DC1 and they said how angry/disappointed they'd be if I had any more DC at this age range (I nearly died first time so they were worried about me as well). Now I'm 33 weeks and still haven't told them. It's just hit me how soon I will be having another baby and none of my family know. DH's family know and are happy but I know mine won't be, and even less so given how late I've left it. How can I even tell them now? I can't sleep worrying about it. I know I have to tell them but I just don't see how

Congratulations!!!!

Call them, breezy voice

"Great news, has a baby x yesterday called y straightforward birth no problems"

As soon as they start hang up.

Congratulations! Why don't you just text them so it's finally done! I don't think you'll ever be able to verbally tell them as you're just too scared.

Dear parents. I've been trying to find a way of telling you something for 6 months now but haven't found the words. I was scared at how disappointed you'd be. This is going to come as a shock but I gave birth to [baby's name] last night. DH and I are over the moon and full of love. We know you'd don't approve of our flat but please don't worry, we are very happy to be a family of four.

Get DH to send a text from your phone: "introducing baby X, time and weight. We're absolutely delighted".

That's all you need. He can filter responses for you while you enjoy your baby. You've told them; then, you haven't apologised so you won't feed into their belief that you've done something wrong; and they don't find out from social media.

Congratulations

Congratulations! That's wonderful, I hope you and baby are doing well

As yourself it’s your life and your choices, you need to women up and stick by them. If your happy your happy, and it shouldn’t matter to anyone else.

As your parents though, I can see why they would be disappointed, I would if it was my child, I probably would be angry and upset that your not doing as well as you should be, however once I calmed down and took time to think about, me personally, I would realise I’m most upset that you felt you couldn’t tell me, and that would be on me, and I couldn’t help feel I’ve let you down a little, as a mother I want my kids to know they can tell me anything and I’m always on their side even if they are wrong in my eyes.

congratulations on your pregnancy! I think you should tell your family your happy news in whichever way suits you best (but I personally would probably say by phone) and let your happiness overide any negative feeling or comments from them and also remind them that there are lots of horrific things going on in the world but....having a very much loved baby with your husband isn't one of them! good luck x

How would I react if it was me? I'd hope I'd ask myself some pretty hard questions like "why on earth did she think I'd be anything other than thrilled?"

And then I'd cast on some knitting and try to make it up to you by being the World's Greatest Grandma.

Congratulations on the baby.

Congratulations!

If you just wait another 18 months or so, the baby can just tell them!

Congratulations - I hope all 4 of you are doing well and adjusting to life with baby.

Congrats

Why ask for advice if you don't take it?
I'm dubious tbh.

Even if you have given birth and haven't told them, it's not really an urgency right now is it?

Congratulations, just send them a picture of baby saying Bob arrived today, we're both well. Letting them find out on social media will escalate things and cause to unnecessary stress

Thanks for all of your wishes ❤️ We are both well.

I'm getting DH to message them this evening. Don't know what to expect as a reply, I'm terrified of what they're going to say but it has to be done. Probably most scared they'll flip and drive to where I live to give me aggravation or I'll get a barrage of hysterical messages and phone calls (can almost guarantee that one) from everyone.

Congratulations on the baby, if your family starts in on you just turn your phone off.

Congratulations, just send them a picture of baby saying Bob arrived today

Please don’t call your baby Bob.

Congrats. How did your family take the news.

This situation really reminds me of how my partner kept putting off telling his family we had a dc.
Procrastinating every time.
He eventually told them when dc was 10 months old
Have you told them yet?

Hope your DH has finally told them.
I wouldn't have bothered apologising, I would have just said " we didn't tell you because you reacted so badly to DC1 we didn't think you'd be bothered"
People do need to find out what consequences their horrible behaviour can have, and this is a good time to tell them.

Congratulations.

Hi all,

Thank you all so much.

DH messaged them on my phone yesterday. I will call them tonight and see how everything is. I don't know what to expect and am very nervous.

@trulep is that a joke??

Sadly very true.

Congratulations op. Did they respond to the message sent by your dh? Its done now and you don’t have to say the words to them so I hope you are able to relax a bit more

@trulep can I ask what happened when they found out??

They replied to him yes. Very shocked as you can imagine.

Congratulations