Fresh Start thread for pregnancy after miscarriage or loss - 2

[Labmum]

New thread, perhaps might be useful to all post an update of history and where we're at now?

@AnneLovesGilbert, @Paranormalbouquet, @Miami81, @hopefulforourrainbow, @HidCat, @NoCats, @beanhunter, @iswallowtoothpaste, @vuduvu, @whiteonesugar, @wishingoneastar77, @NoParticularPattern

Apologies to anyone I've missed, please tag them and let them know of the new thread.

[Labmum]

Oh wow @paranormal did it look like the full plug or just some of it? I had a slight show a few days before labour with DS but plug didn't come away until labour was pretty well established. I remember waking hubby and saying "I think something bad is happening" then going to the loo and the whole plug coming away. It was gross! We left for hospital at that point and DS arrived 4 hours later.

[Paranormalbouquet]

Think just some of it. Lots of brown mucus but no fresh blood. With DD I was well into labour before it went! Had been thinking of expressing some colostrum in advance of section but will hold off now just in case!!

[Miami81]

Wow @Paranormalbouquet I hope everything stays nice and in place for you. That must have been a shock. Take it easy. I assume that with your cerclage there is no way you can be allowed to go into labour?
We had a growth scan today. All ok, on the 50th centile. Have been moved onto the personalised growth chart thing and am really glad.
Also I passed my gestational diabetes test. So all in all positive news.
And then I promptly lost my shit in the consultants office and she has referred me to a psychiatrist in the hospital who supports women in difficult pregnancies.
We also agreed to induction or c-section at 37 weeks. So maximum left is 12.5 weeks. I can do this for 12.5 more weeks, can't I??

[Paranormalbouquet]

Thanks Miami. No I'd need to head in at first sign of labour to have section performed- risk of rupturing uterus would be too high. But there would be time I believe.I'm 36+4 so on the off chance that things happen it wouldn't be a disaster at least.

I'm so glad all is going well for you. You can definitely manage 12.5 more weeks and at least you know things are being monitored closely and if needs be you will be delivered early.

No harm having some psychological help, especially as you move towards the 3rd trimester after such a tough time. When are you back again?

[looking4hope]

whiteonesugar Glad the sore boobs and sickness are back! Just remember that symptoms come and go, and a lack of symptoms for one day or more doesn't mean anything.

Paranormalbouquet Keeping my fingers crossed the little one stays put for now. And even if labour starts, you have a plan in place and you'll be well taken care of. Are you feeling okay otherwise?

Miami81 Great news you had another good scan and you passed the GD test. You can certainly do this for 12.5 weeks, all our struggles have made us stronger than we think we are. I would see the counselling as a positive thing, it can definitely help.

Iswallowtoothpaste Hope the bleeding stopped completely and you're feeling okay.

Hope everyone else is doing okay.

I went to MAU yesterday because I just couldn't stand the unknown. I wasn't offered a scan, but the midwife found the baby's HB (after what seemed like forever) and I felt reassured. She called a doctor to do a speculum exam to check if my cervix is still closed. It is long and closed, but apparently a cervical ectropion is to blame for all the bleeding. Basically my cervix and the cells around it are extremely sensitive and I should expect to bleed throughout pregnancy . I told my manager about the pregnancy yesterday and we had a chat with HR as well, they're letting me work from home for as long as I want as they understand it's a difficult pregnancy. Really happy about that. My DH isn't letting me move much until the bleeding subsides (the speculum only made it worse, I was warned about it), so I'll spend a lot of time in bed this week...

[Anxiousfeelings]

@para wow, I hope everything stays put for you until section date.

@lookingforhope that sounds difficult but glad you got reassurance.

@iswallowtoothpaste hope the bleeding stopped.

Hope everyone else doing well.

I have just reached the 38week point! Can’t really believe it. Still have days that I get really anxious and last appointment with the midwife I burst into tears. She then wrote in my notes that I am ‘very emotional’ and said she didn’t really understand why I was upset. I think it is pretty normal!!

[Iswallowtoothpaste]

@Para my friend very recently had a baby and she lost a little bit of her plug and had some pink blood behind it. She was almost 37 weeks when that happened and went 4 days overdue. Great that they’re going to be on the ball with you though!

@Miami I’m so pleased to hear your positive news hopefully the next 12.5 weeks fly by for you!

@looking4hope I’m so pleased that they’ve checked for baby’s HB (would it really have been that difficult for them to do that in the first instance) I’m sorry you’ve had to wait so long for reassurance.

I have some ectropion too which is what we think has been causing my bleeding. MC is very unlikely after 13 weeks we’ve just got to hold onto that!

[looking4hope]

Iswallowtoothpaste Well, it seems they really don't want you to come to MAU as just before leaving, the midwife told me (and not in a very nice way) that the next time I should just call. I didn't want to start a long discussion about calls not getting me anywhere... I guess they're not allowed to turn you away once you're there since they didn't say anything when I arrived. Funnily enough, there were only four other women in the waiting room, so it's not like they were extremely busy.

I was expecting the extra bleeding to taper off by now, but no luck. I'm so tempted to buy a doppler although I know it's not advisable. I know, I just need to calm down.

[Iswallowtoothpaste]

@looking4hope, I’m so sorry you were treated this way.

I’m so pleased that you went though, it was worthwhile for your reassurance, don’t let them make you feel bad for going in. I’ve been sorely tempted to buy a Doppler too, I still am at times but trying to resist the temptation! Will be feeling movements soon enough though so just think of that!

Sorry to hear you’re still having the bleeding. I know how scary it is but like you say all you can do is rest. I’m thinking of you and hoping the bleeding settles soon! Xxx

[Labmum]

@Anxiousfeelings I think its definitely normal given our situations to be emotional at the stage! 38 weeks! Wow! Are you all organised and just chilling now?

@toothpaste and @looking4hope I'm sorry you've had worrying weeks, try to take it nice a quietly ladies, although the first trimester was terrifying the second was also very scary. The support tapers off because they see everything to be "fine" but our worries don't just instantly vanish after the 12 weeks scan do they? The fading of first trimester symptoms but being too early to feel movement makes for a lot of anxiety.

@Miami you can definitely do another 12 weeks lovely! You may even beat me to it if this little lady goes overdue! The psychiatrist will be really good for you to get support through these last few weeks. Can't imagine the things that must be going through your mind. Big hugs!

@paranormal, any new after the plug or is everything settled? Is your section next week?

[Paranormalbouquet]

I had an ectropion when pregnant with DD. Had very impressive bleeding but she was fine. It was terrifying but mostly settled by the middle of the second trimester.

Lost more plug yesterday but nothing else has happened! I’d prefer to have a nice planned section but am 37 weeks tomorrow so I’m not worried if things happen earlier.

[looking4hope]

Thanks all. I had bad cramps last night. The bleeding hasn't really settled and I passed a thumbnail-sized clot earlier (it looked exactly like the ones I was passing at the start of my MC), so I'm worried sick. I realise it can go both ways and there's nothing the hospital can do if I go there, so just waiting to see how the bleeding evolves after that clot.

[Runruth400]

Hi all.

MMC September 2018 - discovered at 12wk scam. Stopped growing at 8+3.

I've just found out I'm pregnant again (5weeks) and praying this pregnancy goes well 🤞🏼

Xx

[Skystar12]

Hello :)

I had a TFMR at 14 weeks in January this year as our wee girl had anencephaly.
We held off TTC until October and we are over the moon to be pregnant again (currently 5wks +2).
I know that the neural tube should close this week or next week and it is the only thing I can think of.

I’ve been taking 5mg folic acid since January and also pregnancare (conception then max) since September, along with all the broccoli, spinach and fortified cereal I can.. really struggling with the worry and thinking over my previous pregnancy. So hard as we haven’t really told anyone yet this time.

[Iswallowtoothpaste]

@looking4hope
I can’t believe they won’t scan you! You should be priority being over 12 weeks, bleeding, pain and now clots.

Extremely worrying for you and I can’t believe they’re leaving you in the lurch like this!

[Hopefulforourrainbow]

Wow this thread has been busy! Lots to catch up on. Sorry to hear some of you have been having a difficult time.
I'm 12 weeks today so have stopped the 5mg folic acid and have started to reduce the cyclogest. Going to just do it at night now but not sure how long for. Have scan and consultant appointment on Monday. Still feeling quite anxious at times. Hubby keeps telling me to relax!

[looking4hope]

Iswallowtoothpaste I've been at the hospital since 3pm and I've only seen a midwife briefly st 5pm. The MAU doesn't do scans (!!!). A doctor was supposed to see me at 5pm, but he was called for an emergency C-section. There's no other doctor available and the nighttime doctor comes at 9:30pm. It's chaos and so disheartening. And this is at UCLH...

[Paranormalbouquet]

Looking I hope you have been seen by now? It’s a pity the epu don’t see after 14 weeks isn’t it, leads to terrible delays.

[Labmum]

@looking I hope you got seen. I'm really surprised that they don't have a better service. At my hospital you see EPU until 20 weeks and they have a sonographer in the department and run it like an A&E triage clinic. After 20 weeks you go to the MAU where they are currently training the midwives to be able to do some of the scans required (I saw a male midwife who was training on scanning for my growth scan last week). Got everything crossed that everything was fine and you are now home and resting.

Welcome @skystar12 and @runruth400 I'm so sorry you both find yourselves here. I have been in exactly your situation @runruth finding a missed miscarriage at my 12 week scan and it was the most traumatic experience of my life, that blissful ignorance of pregnancy came crumbling down around me. It took me a long time to recover emotionally and physically and I went very dark and twisty for quite a long time afterwards.

[Hopefulforourrainbow]

@looking4hope I hope you're ok and home getting some rest. Sending lots of love and hugs x

[looking4hope]

Labmum, Paranormalbouquet, Hopefulforourrainbow and anyone else I missed - thank you so much for the encouraging words and hugs, they help a lot. I got home at 1:30am. I was seen by a nice lady doctor just after midnight, after 9 hours of waiting. She did another speculum exam and although the ectropion is quite large, the blood is not coming from there. She said that an ectropion shouldn't cause heavy bleeding or clots. The cervix is closed and because the midwife listened to the heartbeat at 5pm, she didn't listen again. I was doubled over with pain all day yesterday, which nobody can explain. Paracetamol doesn't help at all. It might be a hematoma causing the bleeding, which only a scan can detect. She requested a scan for me in the system, but apparently the decision needs to be vetted by someone else who will review my notes and decide if I'm worthy of a scan or not. It's just crazy. Not holding up much hope I chose the UCLH because of its reputation and now I regret my decision. I'm still in pain, bleeding and nobody is doing anything to get to the bottom of this. Both me and DH are so discouraged and disappointed with the care I received. Trying to stay positive but it's so hard.

[Iswallowtoothpaste]

@looking4hope, I’m so angry for you! I really, really am. Not good enough is an absolute understatement. I hope you’re getting plenty of rest okay although I know you won’t be reassured much and still out of your mind with worry. A HB is reassuring though! It does sound like a haematoma. My friend had one and she said that she couldn’t believe the blood loss and clots she experienced and nearly fainted when they said the baby was absolutely fine. She went on to have a bouncing baby boy and said that the bleeding cleared up by 18 weeks.

I hope you get to the bottom of it and get some answers soon. But a HB is a good sign!

[Labmum]

@looking, thats awful. I'm so sorry. When you feel stronger its definitely worth complaining about your treatment via PALS. Is it possible for you to go to a different hospital? Or just keep turning up and being a pain in the bum until they do something but that's not ideal when you're feeling rubbish anyways.

Sending hugs, hoping you get to the bottom of it and things settle with the bleeding and pain soon. Take care lovely!

[Hopefulforourrainbow]

I can't believe how you're being treated. It's shocking! Can you go to a different hospital?

[looking4hope]

Iswallowtoothpaste, Labmum, Paranormalbouquet and Hopefulforourrainbow I can't thank you enough for all the hand-holding over the last few days, feels so good to chat with people who understand what you're going through. The hospital called me around lunchtime and said they can squeeze me in at 4pm for a scan (probably because someone cancelled). The baby is fine, 15 weeks today. The sonographer was the nicest lady I've met at UCLH so far, answered all our questions and did her best to reassure us. Professionalism, empathy and amazing care - what every medical professional should have but so many lack. I still don't know what the cause of the bleeding is, she couldn't see any haemotoma, the placenta is not putting pressure on the cervix etc. As far as the pain is concerned, she mentioned that I might feel the ligaments stretching so strongly because I'm slim. It's like very bad period pain, coming in waves. Guess it's something I need to get used with. The bleeding continues, but at least I know the baby is fine.

Sorry for ranting so much this week, I have no close friends who've ever been pregnant and nobody to talk to about all this.

How are you all this evening?