Fresh Start thread for pregnancy after miscarriage or loss - 2

[Labmum]

New thread, perhaps might be useful to all post an update of history and where we're at now?

@AnneLovesGilbert, @Paranormalbouquet, @Miami81, @hopefulforourrainbow, @HidCat, @NoCats, @beanhunter, @iswallowtoothpaste, @vuduvu, @whiteonesugar, @wishingoneastar77, @NoParticularPattern

Apologies to anyone I've missed, please tag them and let them know of the new thread.

Thank you @Labmum!
Oh no what are you like!? Take care lots of rest as much as you can!

Regarding changes whether this has done any good or not I do not know but due to multiple subcloronic bleeds in previous pregnancies I have practically put myself on semi bedrest and treated myself like an invalid. Been really careful not to overstretch, no lifting, cut down my hours at work drastically, limited going up and down stairs and just rested as much as I’ve been able to.
Hospital really don’t seem to try to prevent anything bad happening, I think they see it as what will be will be.

Oh @Labmum you poor thing, what a shock. How are you feeling today? Sod all you can take for the pain, god I miss painkillers... Rest up and make sure DH is looking after you. He owes for those Christmas lie ins!

DH is so poorly again We were up till about 5, it was awful, and I'm spanjaxed. Working from home while he sleeps and I'm nearly witless from lack of sleep.

Congrats @MaltedMilk88! Good plan looking after yourself, how've you been feeling?

Hope everyone's okay today.

How is everyone? @Anne how is your DH now? Hoping he's much better!

I'm slowly feeling better after my tumble, get a lot of tailbone pain still though, think it could linger for a while. Had a growth scan this week and my little monkey obviously did not appreciate my stair antics and is now transverse from being nicely head down the entire time. Baby is estimated to be very big too so they sent me home with a blood sugar monitor to see if that's causing it but readings have all been fine so don't think it's that. I've to go back at 37 weeks for a position and growth scan and then we'll make decisions from there. If still transverse it's looking like a section or ECV, and if she's big they'll probably be looking at giving her an early eviction notice! I'm just frustrated that I have 3 more weeks of not being able to have a plan in mind.

Been thinking of you all. Hoping you and bumps are all well!

@Labmum that's pants that she has turned on you. Plenty of time to get back into position.
I thought my little lady had sorted herself into a head down position but I reckon she's gone back to transverse now. Ordering a birthing ball this morning. I don't mind what way she comes out but they are going to make me wait longer if it's a csection so ideally I would like her in position so that we can try the induction route.
That's good that your blood sugars are ok. At this stage they need to check in case they need to make any special arrangements at delivery and monitor babies blood sugars etc. You are obviously just growing her well!!
30+2 here today. Have started looking at essentials for hospital bag. Mainly so that if we have anymore random overnight stays that we are a bit more prepared.

Hi everyone, caught up with you all last night during one of my (many) night feeds!

Miami you are getting so close now, hope you are feeling well. Plenty of time for baby to turn. Mine was still all over the place at 37 weeks.

Labmum same for you re time to turn! Hope you have a plan soon. Did you see what pushed measurements up on growth scan. My DD was estimated as 95th centile on the final growth scan but turns out it was from a mis measurement of her femur length. She was actually 25th centile!

Anne I hope you get some rest. You can hit anyone who tells you to get used to it by the way! I have been getting very little sleep but still feel much more rested not pregnant than I did when pregnant. Hope DH recovers soon too.

Sleep deprivation aside we are doing well. After a hard start to feeding DD2 is now a breast mad 1 month old! I’m delighted and probably the only person happy to be cluster feeding of an evening! Still have some work to do on latch and are still using shields around 50% of the time but we will get there. My lactation consultant wants me to train up in peer support and I’m strongly considering it, especially given my profession I think it might be something really useful.

Oh @paranormslbouquet thanks for dropping in, so lovely to hear from you and glad you and baby are doing well! It'd be great for you to train as a peer supporter, the more people available to help new Mums the better to stop those old wives tales being passed on.

@Miami81 you're so close now. What sort of things are you putting in your hospital bag? I need to sort mine out and can't remember from when I had DS. Have you looked on the spinning babies website? I've been trying the techniques on there.

@paranormal the growth measurements are mainly being pushed up by her tummy circumference, she was following the 95th centile but is now way above the top which is why they were concerned about the diabetes. I'll admit I did eat a lot of crap over Christmas so even though the blood monitoring was fine I'm going to cut back on the sweets/cakes/biscuits as I don't want her having trouble with low blood sugar when she arrives. I've also got some syringes so I can hand express some colostrum from 37 weeks ready to give her if needed.

Last night it definitely felt like her feet were back up by my ribs but this morning I can't tell.

Hi ladies. Nice to hear from you para.
I'm 18 weeks today. Had midwife on Friday. Was hoping she'd listen for heartbeat but she refused. I have friends who heard their babies at 16 weeks. I'm full of the cold today and feeling sorry for myself. Sore throat, runny nose and feeling achy. Start nights tonight too so not good timing. You're all getting so close to your due dates! So exciting! I hope you'll still hang around after. I'll miss you all!

There you lot are! Haven't been around in months but thought I'd sneak on by and see how you're getting on.

Congratulations to those who have had their babies, and wishing everyone else my best with the rest of your pregnancies.

Our DD is now 4 months old somehow and has been home for 2 so we're now starting to get into the swing of things.

Hi everyone - hope this is ok to post. I’ve been lurking here for a few weeks and reading all your news and great advice.
Wondering if anyone can help - today I went for a 7 week scan and have been diagnosed with my 5th miscarriage. Has anyone had this many? Also - can anyone recommend any alternatives to nhs? Apparently there’s nothing they can do. We’ve seen Dr Shihata at the MC in Epsom. Does anyone know of any others? Sat at home waiting for medical management to kick in and feeling pretty desparate right now for some help.

Oh @Murphymoo84 I am so incredibly sorry. It is just the worst. I have had 2 mc's and then a stillbirth at 27 weeks. My local rmc were almost entirely useless so I can understand your frustration.
Have they literally said there is nothing they can do?? That's ridiculous.
I know you may not be up for talking about it just yet, but what was your treatment strategy in this latest pregnancy? Almost everyone on this thread has different treatments from different places so this is a good place to come for knowledge.
@AnneLovesGilbert I know was on a very detailed regime for this her latest pregnancy, and as far as I know this is her 6th pregnancy, with all others having resulted in mc to date. But she is flying it with this one and is similar dates to me at 30 weeks now.
Go gentle on yourself. Massive hugs from us.

Hey lovelies. He's okay at the moment thank you lab but it's a recurring issue and and we could both do without the stress.

I was going to recommend spinning babies which was suggested at my hypno class, is it a good resource? That's good your readings are all fine. Fx she moves for you. And I hope you're less achy, keep taking it as easy as you can.

Hey miami, can you recommend your birthing ball? I need to spend less time lolling on the sofa of an evening so was going to get one. Are you having two bags, one for you and one for your baby, or just the one? Up for suggestions for that too! I was going to ask if you're still going to acupuncture too. I had a great session at the weekend, god I love her, she was trying to tackle my horrendous insomnia, and we were talking about having more frequent sessions from 37 weeks. I'm also planning to see my hypno lady for reflexology as she has pre-birth sessions.

Hello para! Thinking of you often, so lovely to hear from you. I can't believe she's already a month! Is it flying by? Give her head a big sniff for me, I love a newborn Glad feeding is going so much better, wonderful. And thank you for that, I comfort myself by thinking as I'm still standing maybe I just need less sleep than I used to. When I'm up in the night with the nipper there'll feel more point to it than just being awake for no sodding reason.

Training as a peer supporter sounds like an amazing idea, definitely worth looking in to! You've always been so helpful, patient, knowledgable and kind to me here I know you'd be a gift to someone needing support.

This year's lurgy's been the worst hopeful, I've had it twice and felt like utter crap so sending hugs. I found a saline aerosol nose spray thing helpful when I couldn't breathe. It's ionised water and salt so nothing and in it. Tastes grim but it did help. Hope you feel better soon. Disappointing you didn't hear the hb but not long till your next scan! Have you got it booked in?

Unicorns! Hello! Really great to hear you're all doing well now, thanks for popping in

Welcome @Murphymoo84 I'm so so sorry for your losses My heart goes out to you so much, sending a gentle hug x

As Miami says, lots of us have had similar histories and different levels of support/treatment plans. You're in the eye of the storm right now so just try and get through the next few days and weeks. But when you're ready, let us know what you've tried so far and ask any questions you want. There's also a ttc after recurrent loss thread and people on there may be having tests and under different types of clinics you may find useful. I'm more than happy to share my history, this is number 6 for me and I've tried a few different approaches under the same consultant in an NHS RMC clinic. I don't want to baffle you with stuff when you're going through another loss at the moment but ask on here or PM me and I'm here if you want to talk.

Have you had medical management before? I tried it with one of mine and it wasn't great and didn't work (though I was 12 weeks at the time) so while I hope it does for you, don't suffer at home if you don't think it's happening as expected, make a hassle of yourself at your EPU and look at the other options. I so wish someone had told me you don't get prizes for "bravery" and it's okay not to suffer.

Hi everyone!

I have been looking for a support thread to join in with and I came across this one.

I am only 12 weeks pregnant and haven’t had my dating scan yet.

I had a miscarriage earlier this year and I’m finding it hard to stay calm throughout this pregnancy. I convince myself daily that it is going to happen again. I need that dating scan to come around!!

Welcome @BeckyButterfly and congratulations on your pregnancy

When’s your scan? The first couple of months drag like nothing else, especially when you’ve had a loss and the worry of another is hanging over you.

Hopefully your scan will bring happy reassurance and you can relax a bit.

This is such a supportive thread, it’s kept me sane on many an occasion! You’re very welcome here and I hope you find it helps.

How have you been feeling?

Thank you @AnneLovesGilbert

My scan is next Tuesday (15th) at 2pm and I can’t wait. I’ve already had two early pregnancy scans; one at around 5 weeks then another at around 8 weeks because I had a small bleed really early on so assumed I was miscarrying again. At the first scan I was not a fan of the midwife who told me that I was likely I was having another miscarriage then looked at me like I had three heads when I started to cry! Luckily, when I went for the second scan everything looked good and there was a little heartbeat so fingers crossed I get the same news next week when I’ll be 13 weeks.

I have been hit really badly with sickness. The past five weeks I have vomited every day then nearly ended up in hospital yesterday due to dehydration. I have anti sickness medicine which seems to be reducing the amount of vomit I am producing!!

@hopeful sorry to hear you didn't get to hear the heartbeat. It's now policy in our area too, even at my 21 week appointment they wouldn't listen in.

@unicorns so glad you are all doing well now, so nice to hear happy endings to the journey.

@Anne I use my exercise ball all the time now, would highly recommend. Aldi have some in on a special buy at the minute. They also have a baby event starting today and they have changing mats/hooded towels etc that are great, highly recommend their nappies too. I'm going to stock up tomorrow.

Welcome @beckybutterfly. Hope the next few days fly by and you get some reassurance on Tuesday. It's a long wait in those first few weeks.

I'm hoping that the spinning babies has worked and baby has now moved, I can now definitely feel feet at the top but my worry is she's gone full breech with her feet up by her head. Im hoping not but difficult to tell. There has been a flurry of arrivals amongst my friends and relatives which makes me "next" and the paranoia is creeping in that something terrible will happen, that we won't get our happy ending. I'm trying to keep as calm as possible and busy myself with all the last minute preparations and home renovations that we have going on. Two weeks until my next scan when we'll get a better idea of what my birth plan will be. DH and I are going on an active birth workshop this weekend just so we can dedicate some time to thinking about this pregnancy.

Hope you're all well.

Welcome and congratulations @beckybutterfly.
Scan is 23rd January. Counting down the days! I have another booked for 28 weeks too. I think the consultant wanted to make it seem like he was doing something! Will be nice to see baby again though.
Hope you're all well. It's a miserable dark day here. Planning a trip to supermarket then an afternoon catching up on tv in my pjs.

Thanks everyone 😊 it’s nice to hear everyone’s stories. Every pregnancy is completely different!

Hi again, I've been lurking around a bit, but been a bit paranoid to post.

Am currently in a world of anxiety. Had some spotting last Wednesday, went to the EPU and was scanned- all looked good at 7+6. Reassuringly there was still a heartbeat which we had seen the week before and the baby had grown exactly a week on as it should have done.

I had more spotting over the weekend, but obviously old, brown blood. Is till find this terrifying as that is how all of my miscarriages ahve started. Had a bot more yesterday and then again today the spotting has gone pink/ red. I have another appointment at EPU tomorrow morning, which is the earliest they can see me, but I can't shake the feeling that this is the end.

I didn't have any spotting at all in either of my sucessful pregnancies, so even though I know it can be common, it's not something that bodes well for me.

Sometimes I think that I can cope with the constant losses, it's jsut the hope that is so difficult

Hi @gin. Sorry to hear you're going through this worry. I've had 3 consecutive miscarriages that all started like what you've been describing. Had the same again this time, including the spotting turning to bright red blood and somehow I'm now 19 weeks pregnant. Many people bleed in pregnancy for a huge variety of reasons but because of what we've been through we're always going to fear the worst. Sending lots of hugs, love and luck your way. Will be thinking of you tomorrow xxx

Thanks @hopeful. This is good to hear.

I veer wildly between insane pessimism and blind optimism and the moment.

There are a few people at work who know, including my managers and thankfull as they are all women, there is a lot of empathy and finger crossing from them.

DH is also very optimistic, it's in his nature. We've agreed that this is the last roll of the dice and whatever happens, happens. We've ahd an insane couple of years of stress and bereavement; we lost a friend to suicide, my dad died and we had 3 miscarriages in the space of 18 months and for my own well being I just can't put myself through this anymore.

Jsut need to try and keep calm and focussed on getting through tomorrow.

@ginpig I hope all goes well for you tomorrow. I've unfortunately been in your situation too, I never found the early scans that reassuring as my miscarriages all happened at 8-9weeks gestation with heartbeat seen before that point. It's such a nervewracking time and sounds like you've had a really tough couple of years, got everything crossed for you.

19 weeks @hopeful that's flying by, nearly half way! Will you be finding out girl/boy at your 20 week scan?

36 weeks here and very uncomfortable. I keep getting Braxton Hicks and sporadic contractions. Starting to get really tired finding it tough entertaining my toddler on his days at home with me, starting to worry about how that's going to get any better once baby arrives and I'm sleep deprived! Seeing the midwife on Thursday for my GBS swabs then growth/position scan next week which will hopefully allow us to make a plan for her arrival.

Hope everyone else is well @Miami and @Anne, been thinking of you both.

Wow 36 weeks already @labmum! Have you picked a name yet? They don't tell you the sex at 20 week scan where I live. We would rather it was a surprise anyway though.

@hopeful we've got a shortlist of names with a front-runner among them so we'll just see if it suits her when she comes out.

That's strange that your hospital doesn't tell you. Ours won't write it down for gender reveal ridiculousness but will have a quick look for you if you want to know. To be honest during the scan the sonographer had done quite a few sweeps across her whole body with a few between the legs angles and both DH and I already thought it was a girl from seeing those (not that we're experts). At my last growth scan my Mum came with me and I said "oh look Mum there's her face on the right of the screen" and she just couldn't see it at all despite really obvious lips and nose so maybe after all my scans I'm getting an eye for it.

Thinking of you today @ginpig

I am worried we'll see by accident at scan next week but plan to say to sonographer when we go in that we don't want to know so we can look away when they're at that part. Have you got your nursery all organised now? I've started looking but haven't bought anything and don't plan to for a while yet.
Has anyone else been feeling really hot? I keep waking up hot and with a sore arm (trying to sleep on side which I'm struggling with as I'm usually a tummy sleeper!). I manage to sleep for a few hours then I'm awake for the rest of the night.
Good luck today @gin xx

Quick update becuase I feel I have probably wasted enough of my work day and I ahve a to do list that vanishes off intot he horizon at the moment.

Scan went well. All present and correct and as it should be. Measured at 8+6 so exactly a week on from where we were last week. Saw a heart beating away. Nurse and sonographer were lovely and very reassuring- couldn't find any source of ongoing bleeding and in her words 'I have absolutely no concern here'.

They told me to push back my scan booked in for next week to the following week, so will have another scan on the 28th.

So I am feeling a lot better (for now, will probably be on the ceiling again t his time tomorrow, but that's the fun of early pregancy right?)

Thanks for all the hand holding and thoughts- it's much appreciated