Due January 2019 (3rd thread)

[Buttercup53]

Starting a new thread for the January 2019 crew! Newcomers welcome :)

Sorry this thread has gone somewhat astray! Hope everyone is having a nice Saturday morning and feeling good? 😀

Morning ladies had a really unsettled night but little miss was moving and felt a couple of strong kicks.

I really want to get our pram ordered over the next week and decorate the nursery so we can try and get organised.

Hope you are all having a good weekend so far.

Someone came along and heavily implied their baby died because of a flu vaccine, and @jennac, you said ‘I bet you’d struggle to have a doctor confirm a link between that and the flu vaccine’. That’s dangerous and I can’t abide the idea of someone panicking because they’ve had their flu vaccine and then read that, and you guys are using it as evidence for your unverified claims. Even if you didn’t directly say it, you know exactly what you’re implying.

There was almost a full page of uninterrupted anti vaccination discussion before I said anything, so don’t suggest I’ve derailed the thread because I’ve jumped in and said I disagree with you and given you reasons why. It’s not that complicated to find out how to send a private message over MN if you really wanted to avoid a debate.

If everyone else is upset by my comments, by all means create your own thread, I won’t join it and ruin your fun. Like I said, maybe my emotions are running high at the minute, as normally I’d just think ‘leave them to it’. But this has rubbed me up the wrong way today and I can’t quite believe no one else is agreeing with me.

I fear that by saying this, the debate may go on and on and on but for what it's worth @buttercup53 I 1000000% agree with you. I also had a mini panic attack after the 'my baby died after the flu jab' comment seeing as I have mine booked in, along with the whooping cough, on Tuesday coming. I am trying to forget about that comment and remember the millions of people who have those jabs and nothing happening, plus all the jabs I had as a baby/child. It the anti-Catholic movement sickens me as it's not as simple as 'each to their own, their children, their choices' (which is the opinion I take on 99% on other things people chose to do in their lives). The difference here is that other choices people make don't affect or hurt me or my family. Not vaccinating against diseases DOES. we should be so grateful we live in a world, and a country, where research and discoveries and access to these vaccines is not only available but FREE. Instead, the antivac movement is pushing us backwards and reintroducing HORRIBLE diseases into our society that had previously been almost eradicated. That is my view.

In other news, I am going pram shopping next weekend. So excited! And we bought the car seat the other day and I think we re almost ready with clothes!

The ANTI-VAC movement sickens me... Not Catholic haha. I have nothing against catholics haha

@Buttercup53 I didn't mean to leave you feeling unsupported, I also completely agree.

As @SophieStripe said, this isn't a matter where 'live and let live' really works, as it has repercussions for everyone.

@Buttercup53 I'm here supporting you as well. I've watched this thread from the beginning but not made many comments. The discussion this morning really worried me and got me googling as a person who booked the flu jab yesterday. One personal experience can really make a difference here so I think there is a need to be careful.

As I said yesterday @Buttercup53 I have had both flu and whooping cough vaccines and other than a sore arm it seemed fine. I dont want my baby to become unwell or me while I am trying to protect her so I will take up the recommended treatments.

@Buttercup53 I wholeheartedly agree with you, it will panic women who have read that & you were completely right to ask that question, so thank you.

@jennac you are perfectly entitled to talk to midwife & GPs who should listen to you as a patient & not scaremonger. I know of parents who have split up the vaccinations into individual doses as they researched with GPs.

I’m booked in for my whooping cough on Tuesday, got our monthly quiz night after so hope my arm isn’t too achy.

Currently lying down as shattered from a school fete, food shop & playing with DC.

Finally going to order drawers this week so I can go to my friends for our baby clothes & I chucked them at her after my last pregnancy stating I didn’t need them anymore .

Just a month away from third trimester which seems so fast.

Hope everyone is having a nice weekend.

Sorry all, reading back my last comment from this morning I realise I’ve strong armed people into joining a discussion they might not feel comfortable about. I can let my feelings run away with me sometimes, and my emotions are heightened a lot at the moment as I’m going through a stressful situation.

To start a new, less controversial topic as I’m primarily the person who’s dragged this out: I’ve seen that the ONS have released data for the most popular names from 2017, and you can search for your local area. I’m not super bothered whether the name I pick is popular or not, but it’s interesting to see where the names rank anyway; in my area the most popular names are Oliver and Olivia. Is anyone else struggling with names? We have a short list of three but I don’t really love any of them... Ideally I want to name him after either mine or my husband’s granddad, but my husband isn’t keen.

This is the ONS link: www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/birthsdeathsandmarriages/livebirths/articles/babynameswhereyoulivecouldshapewhatyoucallyourbaby/2018-09-21

Sorry been AWOL.

We have a name picked, we know we are having a boy so unless we change our minds we are pretty set on Giles Francis as our name.

Giles is a family name on my husbands side and we both love it and there’s the added bonus that FIL will ABSOLUTELY hate it which makes me happy.

Have been reading the vaccines posts with interest but won’t comment anymore than I have already done now.

I think we are going to go with the name Edward, but will decide for definite once we’ve seen him. Interesting reading the ONS link!

We had a surveyor come this week (for those who missed previous posts, we have big building work done on the house but with harvest bla bla bla we have been unorganised at getting it sorted). We have decided to add a second storey extension to an existing one story extension, which will become the nursery. We’ve decided it will be best to do this in the Spring, so poor baby won’t have a nursery until then (not that he needs one) and poor me will have to contend with builders and a 4 month old! (Perhaps I should say poor builders having to content with a sleep-deprived me ). We will also be knocking out a wall in the kitchen and making the downstairs bathroom into a laundry room. We are going to begin the upstairs bathroom (currently a bedroom) imminently though, as current bathroom is barely suitable for adults, let alone a newborn!

Wow @GinGeum that sounds like a lot of work!! Although worth it and it will all be lovely when it's done!

Has anyone else only got a shower? (No bath). I was looking at those baby seat things but they say only for use in the bath so I'm not really sure what to do. I guess the best way is just to fill up a baby bath and do it that way. Or maybe just in the kitchen when it's little!

Buttercup53 i never mentioned my baby died BECAUSE of the flu jab ,it was the same time of me having the flu jab that my babys heart stopped so thats the reason for my decision not to have the flu jab.like i said my reasons but bo medical reason ehy my baby passed.but thats the only reason why thats swaying me not to have it xx

@jennac you can get a little baby paddling pool to put in the shower that I’ve seen people use if that’s easier than the baby bath?

@Buttercup53 that’s an interested link.

I was one of seven Emma’s in my
Year & all with the same middle name so we tend to go for non traditional names which OH loves too.
Both boys have very individual names with welsh middle names.
I’ve chosen the boy’s name with middle so OH just needs middle name.
Girls name just changed the letter of our name we chose as I hated the shortened version that it could be done as but no middle names.

Actually going a lot better than with my first when I had a complete pregnancy tantrum at 22 weeks that he had no name & therefore we hated him.

@GinGeum that sounds like a lot of work but will be worth it in the long run, maybe best to try and not think about the building work just now.

On a totally different matter, where is everyone buying maternity clothes? I bought a pair of black work trousers from Asda which are great but apart from that I'm living in leggings. Anyone got any recommendations for good jeans or jeggings?

A lot of work indeed, but I almost feel better that the work will be split in two - seems less daunting even though the work has increased?! And doing it when the weather is better will just make life easier I think. Our house is an old Farm Cottage with a really impractical layout which seems just as daunting to live in with small children as a house with building work!

Merrz I’ve been wearing Asda maternity jeans or leggings with loose fitting shirts and tops. I think I might buy a dress or two from Vertbaudet and I really want the H&M maternity dungarees! I’m already fed up of wearing the same thing all the time.

@Merrz also asda but have to say ebay is great too.

@Merz I feel like an ad for New Look, I can’t get enough of their Jenna maternity jeans. They’re the only ones I’ve found that are properly skinny and not basically jeggings (fairly thick material). I don’t think the bump band will be large enough for later pregnancy but I really like them for now, as well as the New Look dungarees. Also like ASOS leggings, massive bump area so it makes them really comfy. I tried some mothercare stuff and it’s comfy, but it’s sized very small so be warned if you’re ordering online!

I've only just caught up with this thread & while I categorically don't want to continue the vaccine chat (I now know how to private message anyway) I do want to apologise to @Chelle13 if anything that has been said to you re vaccines has caused you upset or added to what is your very real grief. I started a discussion because I wanted to find out what other people were doing re vaccines in pregnancy. I can't help but feel somewhat responsible that as a result of your openness in sharing your personal experience you have had to defend your decision this time around.

I maybe mistakenly viewed this thread as a supportive forum whereby we could share our concerns & worries at this special time for us all. However I cant help but feel being told to leave & start another thread to continue 'our fun' is as far from supportive as you can get. I think all of us can agree that there is nothing 'fun' about this topic & least of all for you @Chelle13.

But that's me now 100% out!!

On a lighter not got the most beautiful baby blue cashmere throw for my nursing chair in the sale in John Lewis that I'm just beaming about!! Love a Saturday purchase x

Im now going to keave the group,but you havw never been through wat i have and not every pregnancy is the same .n medical research might say its safe but it juat might not of been for me.but as you seem such an expert i will leave it with u

buttercup I also wholeheartedly agree with you on the vaccines thing btw. I say that as someone who is pregnant with what could be an extremely sick baby, and if the vaccines caused something bad to happen, as heartbroken as I'd be, I'd know that if my baby couldn't survive the flu/whooping cough vaccine, she certainly wouldn't survive the illnesses themselves. Sorry if that upsets anyone, but I'm booked to have my jabs straight after my amniocentesis on Monday.

Not going to lie, am starting to absolutely shit myself about the amnio, have convinced myself that due to them having to go through the placenta is going to make it horrendously, unbearably painful. Suppose it has to be done though. Anyone had one before?

Obviously don’t want to drag this out any longer than it needs to be, but clearly I’ve not been fully understood. At no point, @chelle, were my comments aimed at you specifically, and I’m sorry you felt they were. I asked you a couple of questions, I tried to ask sensitively as I fully appreciate your personal experience is extremely upsetting, and I’m sorry if they weren’t. I agree that not every body and every pregnancy is the same - which is why I made the comparison to food allergies. Some people can’t eat nuts, and some people can’t tolerate certain medications. Which is exactly why the majority should be vaccinated, to protect those who can’t be. @elidih at no point was I asking her to defend herself, and to suggest I did is disingenuous and pretty cruel. I asked for clarity because the post was shocking to read, which several other people agreed with regardless of their stance on vaccinations.

@irony I bet it’s really nerve wracking and I’m sorry you have to go through it. I don’t have any experience to offer, I’ve read people’s experiences of it online and often they said that the thought of it was worse than the reality if that’s at all helpful?

Love that names link - the top names are Oliver & Olivia in our area too but only 11 boys and 8 girls so not really that many!

I haven’t bought any maternity clothes yet just living in leggings as I always do anyway 😀