Pregnancy 12 week + post IVF/infertility - general chat and support

[Janefx40]

I thought I would start a thread for those of us pregnant post IVF/infertility. There are lots of pregnancy clubs on Mumsnet but it feels like a slightly different experience having got here the hard way!

I've put 12 weeks + because there is another group for women who have just got their BFPs. That is such an anxious time and definitely needs support.

But I thought this group might pick us up a little further along - over the first panic but still learning about the experience.

Not being exclusive tho - if you think this is the group for you, come along in...

So come and join us if you would like to xxx

@janefx40 I understand about the milestone and about decaf, it makes me worry even more when we start talking about nursery colours etc. I'm not too sad I didn't get everything from the scan, in some way quite pleased I get to see her again soon.

Definitely a strong willful lady in the making. Hopefully she won't get too broken by society.

I've been thinking about Decaf too.
I go into the special care baby unit on Wednesday to get steriods etc. ready to deliver the baby on Friday. He'll be premature, but he seems to be a good size, and if he makes it through the birth he should be ok.
Take care of yourselves, it's hard work past 30 w!

How many weeks are you dame? My boyfriends cousin has just had her baby at 33 weeks due to her placenta ripping and nutrients not getting to the baby. They are fine. I’m sure you both will be too. Good luck! X

Had my 4d scan today just when you think your on the home straight, the girl tells me my placenta is really low and I need to speak to my midwife to get checked over! As his face is squashed right up next to it!!

@Liverpool19 hope all goes well when you see the midwife. Did you manage to see baby?

I have my gender scan next week. Still waiting on a proper bump, but can feel all my insides being squashed and stretched.

You’re all so much further ahead than me! But so nice to see how things are going for you all x

beherenow yes we seen him eventually when he moved his hands away from his face and he moved slightly so the placenta was off his face. I didn’t get my bump until about 20 weeks I think and even then it was still about 26 weeks before it was proper rounded 😂

X

@Liverpool19 I hope the midwife will be able to reassure you. It might just be so they are aware of it for the birth...
@Beherenow32 How exciting!!!! I have mine beginning of november... I'm 14+4 today and i have to wait for my 20w scan!!! Are you going for a private scan?
I'm like you ... constantly checking my tummy. When I see a bump I automatically think it must be a "food bump" or fat being pushed out.. haha But i've read that first pregnancy's bumps tend to take time to show themselves. And we complain now but wait so our bumps will be so big that can't move!!

I went back for my harmony test and got my results in 4 days(!) and everything is perfect...

I wish everyone a good weekend!

street80 that’s brilliant!

I’ve spoken to a friend who is a midwife, they will send me for another scan to check where it is. If it’s where the girl today told me she thinks it is (covering my whole cervix opening) it will be a planned section at either 38/39 weeks, as long as there’s no bleeding. It’s really dangerous apparently as it can erupt and cause bleeding towards the end of pregnancy. Also I can go into natural labour if it’s left and because it’s blocking the cervix I would have to have an emergency section. So I’d rather have a planned one instead of going through labour then having a section anyway! X

@Liverpool19 that’s reassuring a out bump size, thanks. I’m constantly checking it 😂 I actually just read about that in the ready steady baby book. That you need to watch the position of the placenta. Hope all is ok xx

@Street80 lol, yeah! We’re the same then. I’m always looking for my bump. I’m a def a little bigger.
It’s a private scan, which was booked as a present from a family member 😊 my nhs scan is about 2 weeks after! I find it so hard to wait for the scans! Glad to hear you’re doing well x

@Liverpool19 hope the midwife gives you a clean bill of health. I think that is the same as @DameSylvieKrin has. Placenta previa. I have it too at the moment but they said it's quite common at this stage and can still move later.

@emalady Lovely to see your girl again so soon.

@Street80 Congrats on harmony. Such a relief.

I am planning to move my care as we have moved areas. Went on a tour of one of possible hospital today. It was so dingy and dark - the birthing centre was lovely but I'm unlikely to be in there as I'm already deemed medium to high risk. Going to see the other possible hospital soon. I suppose it doesn't matter - the care is good. I just didn't imagine meeting my baby in such a grim environment.

@Beherenow32 I know how much you must want a bump but I got mine super early and was so embarrassed. Even now people are surprised I'm only 23 weeks. It was hard dealing with people's reactions so I'm not sure either situation is good. I dread new people coming to my pregnancy yoga as they're always more pregnant than me and half the size!!!

Xxx

Yes jane it’s really common early on. I had my notes out from my 20 week scan last night and at the scan it was “left lateral” so it’s moved down instead of up 😳 I was reading last night it’s really common in ivf pregnancies to have it 🙈 so glad I went for the 4d scan, I honestly don’t think enough care is given to us after IVF we should be scanned a couple of more times throughout! X

Sorry I’m meant to add I’m 30 weeks and it’s normally moved by now x

Liverpool, do you not get extra scans? I get a couple of extra ones. I had one just before 31 weeks and getting another at 36 weeks. I bet you are really glad you went for your 4D scan if not!

Dame, best of luck for this week. Will be thinking of you. I bet you can’t wait to hold your baby in your arms - so exciting!

beherenow - hope the scan goes well next week.

Street - great news on the harmony test, so reassuring.

Jane - hope the other hospital is less dingy and still offers great care. As you say, care is the most important but it’s not good when you don’t have a great feeling about a place.

Loving the bump size chat - I was so neat last time around and wish I could go back in time, everything was so much easier. This time around I feel huge and everything is such an effort (putting on socks, tights, shoes and when I drop something on the floor I need to pick up I could cry!!).

I'm 21 weeks and I have a bit of a tummy anyway, made worse by compulsive eating of carbs to stem nausea, I'm just about getting a bump now. Still not convinced I can feel her move. I'm sure in a few weeks when bending is difficult I will look back on the little bump fondly!!

Thank you for your bump stories! I feel like everything inside is being squashed and just wish it had more space! But I suppose that it will just get worse! Lol

@Liverpool19. I agree about extra scans. I just had the one at 7 weeks and then was discharged from fertility clinic. Which was a good, but also scary feeling!

All the best xx

swim no I’ve had no extra 😳 I will tell her I want to be monitored more closely now. I had a bleed at 11 weeks which I was scanned on, then I paid for a gender scan. So glad I paid for my one yesterday 🙈 will give the midwife a ring ASAP. I’ve spoke to a work friend and she said the last time this happened to someone they put her on reduced hours as they didn’t want to take the chance with anything happening in work.

Enough about my drama anyway. I hope everyone is well!! X

I don’t get any extra scans through the fertility clinic but I get more appointments and scans through the NHS. I can’t remember when the first extra one was in addition to the usual 12 and 20 weeks but got the one at 30+6 and get another at 36 weeks. I also have a doctors apppointment as well as midwife at each scan.

I know the eating carbs feeling well emalady. beherenow, it does feel a bit squished and my bump seems to get bigger and tighter as the day progresses!

Sorry janeI completely ignored your comment about changing hospitals! If that’s what you feel is best then go for it!
swim that’s really good that you get extra! I wish I did now, I feel like I’m panicking that the placenta is hurting his little face.
I’ve text my midwife and asked her to call me first thing.

X

I’m sure it’s not Liverpool but sounds like it’s definitely worth speaking to the midwife. I have been really lucky with my care I have to say.

How did you get on this morning @Liverpool19?

I had one extra scan at 7 weeks and have a consultant appointment at 22 weeks but that's all the extra I get, wierd how much it varies by area. I keep being told /hearing you should talk or sing to your baby bump, do you do that? I have a tummy but not a proper bump yet and it's still a bit wierd /awkward.

I know, it is weird how much it varies. I don’t talk or sing to the bump but DH does! I figure the baby will know my voice well when it arrives but DH loves a bit of chat and a made up song!!

swim my midwife is sending me for an extra scan. I’ve been feeling like pressure/rubbing quite far down when I walk now aswell not sure if this is just because his head is down or it’s the placenta 🤷🏼‍♀️ emalady no I don’t do any of that. X

Hi everyone!! Thank you all for the good thoughts for my harmony test.

@Liverpool19 I had no idea it could even happen... But as you said, thanks to that private scan, it got noticed on time and you will be able to have the proper care for you and baby. And that's what is important!

@emalady and @swimchick1980 my midwife told me that even though it's an IVF pregnancy I'm categorise as "normal" and won't receive any extra care... I'm only meeting the "chief" of the service at the end of Octobre so I will ask him the question directly but as far as my midwife told me, the only thing they will check is the blood pressure at the end of the pregnancy. Unless of course they find abnormal things in the meantime. But I have to say, it felt good to be told I was "normal" for a change.... Will see if it stays that way!!

@emalady I think i will try to talk to the bump. I'm still a bit early, just 14+5 today, but I will give it a try. I know I will feel a bit silly at first but it's just between you and baby at this point! Might as well enjoy it!!

Also today mark the final day of IVF meds for me!!! I stopped the Projesterone injections 2 weeks ago and today was my last steroids pill!!! I'm free!!!!!!!

@Street80 congrats on stopping the meds 🙂

We find out the gender this weekend. Nervous! (Just that everything is ok, not the actual gender). Have had lots of stretching pains the last few days. So, hoping all going ok xx