Fresh Start thread for pregnancy after miscarriage or loss

[BertieBotts]

Welcome everyone :)

I am feeling much more positive today, how is everyone else?

@Iswallowtoothpaste wow congratulations. Great news!

I'm really sorry you've had such a difficult and stressful time of it, voxnihili. As you say, it's obviously good that the midwife picked it up, but it's a big shock and a scary thing, so it makes sense that you feel a bit shell-shocked right now. Hope you're able to rest, recover and take good care of yourself, and that they'll give you more information on what to expect next in terms of monitoring, etc.

Congratulations toothpaste - fabulous news and I'm glad you're feeling reassured. Particularly good to have got an explanation for the bleeding to put your mind at rest about that.

I'm not on here much but i do try and read your posts and follow up on your news. I'm 14 weeks and just ticking along until the 20 week scan trying not to panic too much etc...

vox that does sound really scary, I'm glad it's been noticed and hopefully if they keep a good eye on you all will be ok in the end. I hope you can get some rest and work isn't too stressful either?

Hello. Please can I dip a very tentative toe in? I got a positive yesterday after a mc at 6ish (surprise pregnancy so not entirely sure on dates) weeks over Easter weekend. I'm 3+4 so really really early, but clear positive on a frer. I'll but due Feb 4th all being well. I'm so scared! Even though the last pregnancy was a surprise, and we'd only just found out (positive on the Wednesday, started mc on the following Monday) I was so sad. I just don't want this one to end the same way.

Having a very emotional day today it’s my due date for my baby boy Bow - who I miscarriaged in December at 16 weeks. Didn’t think I’d be as upset as I am but struggling a bit..xx
Feeling nervous for this little bean at the mo and hoping I can hold on to this one for the duration xx

Oh Maggie, that is hard. Take care of yourself.xx

@Maggi85 these dates are so hard but hang in there. Thinking of you. Have a good cry. That's what I do. We need to mourn.

X

@Maggi85 I’m thinking of you. Dates are hard and they can hit you like a ton of bricks. Be kind to yourself xxx

Amazing news @Iswallowtoothpaste so happy for you!!
Isn’t it amazing when you get such amazing care and support? The recurrent miscarriage clinic I’ve been going to have been amazing and offer me a scan whenever I need one up to 20 weeks to which is so reassuring.

Starting to relax a bit more now, 11 weeks today! Bring on the 12 week scan in a couple of weeks! Pretty sure they will measure me as a week behind where I am due to ovulating late

@Iswallowtoothpaste what a lovely post! So so pleased for you. What a relief!

@voxnihili what a shock for you. Thank goodness the midwife spotted it. I am consultant led due to a previous heart arrhythmia which I had a procedure for 4 years ago. I hope you have been given helpful information and support to process it all. X

Hi ladies. Can I join? I’ve just got 5 (faint) positive pregnancy tests over the last few days. I’m 11dpo so still really early but I’m so worried. I had a miscarriage at 12 weeks in December and then a chemical pregnancy in March. I’m just convinced this is going to go wrong again. I’m especially worried right now as my lines are still faint. Testing again tomorrow, just want to see a dark line 🤞

@mummyjl15 that’s exactly what they’ve said to me, I can self refer for a scan any time until 20 weeks which is fantastic. They were so thorough and I felt like they cared. They all congratulated me when I left too and the nurse (who was absolutely ace) said that if I hadn’t heard anything from my midwives within the next couple of weeks, to ring her and she’d get their backsides into gear 😂

Scarborough hospital gets a bad rep but I really can’t fault them right now. I told my mum last night and she was really happy (although I got a lecture about my weight 🙄) can wait to tell DSD & DD. They’ll be so excited!

Welcome @hayleyfx sorry for your losses. Hopefully you’ll get a strong line soon. Maybe leave it a couple of days and test again? I’d advise waiting until the day your period is due, you’re more likely to get a strong line then without driving yourself crazy wondering if it’s a positive or not. Fingers crossed for you!

@Iswallowtoothpaste ah how exciting!! I’ve just told my dad and parents in law, they were all so excited!! Can’t wait to tell the rest of my family now but we’re going to wait until the 12 week scan to announce it to them. Annoyingly I’ve just had a letter saying my scan date has been moved back a couple of days so I’ve got to wait that bit longer.
At least I know I can go to the recurrent miscarriage clinic if I feel a bit anxious and want another scan between now and then.

Quickly popping back to see how everyone is :)

I'm completely exhausted as I can't sleep properly and have horrible heartburn that makes me sick 🙈 Have our 20-week scan on Friday which I really hope goes well. I'm so nervous we'll get this far only to get told that our baby will have something that is major and incompatible with the outside world. Eurgh I just want her safe and here already. All I want to do is bundle her up and protect her from everything.

@UnicornsandRainbows1 can't believe your 20 week scan is so soon! Time flies. Like you, I was convinced some awful medical condition would rear its ugly head at the 20 week scan. I was so nervous I was sick! The chances of a positive outcome are very high though. I, too, have dreadful heartburn. It's so bad I'm now on prescribed tablets, which help quite a bit, although it's still quite bad in the evenings. Best of luck with your scan.

Good luck with the scan unicorns with DS I was always terrified before the scan, incase something was wrong. I couldn't understand people who were excited!

maggie those dates are so hard, I hope you did something nice to mark the day, or else just allowed yourself to be sad, nothing wrong with that either. I can’t imagine having a mc at 16 weeks, I’m 14 and the thought of losing it in 2 weeks time is so awful.

hayley I remember you from the ttc boards, so nice to see you here! Congrats! I know it’s hard but you are testing so very early and this is so much easier said than done but I’d defo leave it 24/48 hours and test again. You are pregnant though for now so try and hold onto that tiny bit of hope and joy!

unicorns oh good luck for Friday, I know how you feel. There’s no way I’m going to be excited for my 20 week scan, only a bag of nerves again. I’m desperate to feel the baby move but I don’t think I’ve noticed anything yet.

And welcome wellthisis sorry for your previous loss. It’s so hard knowing so early on isn’t it. I found out early too and every single damn day just dragged and dragged!

@mummyjl15 thank you! I’m definitely not helping myself testing so early 🤦‍♀️ I’m just so convinced that it isn’t going to go well! I’m going to use my last frer in a couple days though so FX 😊🤞

@NoCatsHere ah yeah I remember you too!! 😊 thank you! I’m trying very hard now to stay positive, it’s so hard though, desperate to see a dark line 😔 I definitely need to take the ‘relax’ advice on board - going to try even harder haha!

@hayleyfx I'm just getting by on a week-by-week basis (day by day at the start and then week by week over time). I think I remember your name but you might've joined the thread just before I was slowly heading out. It's a long old road but I'm glad you find yourself on this end and hope your lines get darker with everything progressing well

Thanks guys! It is super weird to be so close to 20 weeks (on Wednesday) Flatwhite32 I still can't quite get my head around it. I hope your tablets are helping you.

I don't quite understand the excitement either Wellthisunexpected. Especially people who don't have any scan in between, it seems like such a long time between the dating and anatomy scans. So glad I had one in between.

@NoCatsHere I hope you can feel them soon rather than around 20-odd weeks. It doesn't mean that everything's okay but it's certainly nice to know that they're still around. 14 weeks is a wonderful milestone, so happy for you.

Hey everyone how are you? I love seeing all the updates of people much further on in their pregnancies. Gives me so much hope.

I'm trying really hard to stay positive its so hard in the early days though isnt it?im anywhere 4+4 and 4+6 and i dont really have any symptoms.

Boobs hurt as day goes on but im sure thats from the cyclogest. No sickness. Had a couple of tired days last wk but now fine and i guess i dint really fancy anything other than salty stuff to eat. Over analysing everything and constantly knicker checking. I kp trying to remember past pregnancies but my memories shit. I know i didnt feel bad straight away maybe about 6 wks jus need to kp reminding masel.

@UnicornsandRainbows1 thank you so much hun!! Going to try to relax now haha 😊

Got my BFP finally! 😍 after so many faint lines it’s now quite a dark second line! Feeling so excited and nervous at the same time, I hope this is a sticky bean 😀🤞

Thanks unicorns I feel amazing and lucky to have got to 14 weeks. I feel I might need a scan inbetween, I can’t imagine just waiting until 20 weeks now. It feels an age away. It’s my third baby (5th pregnancy) so I hope to feel them quicker than the 20 week mark, it’s certainly be another welcome bit of reassurance.

dboo time drags at the beginning like nothing I’ve ever experienced. I mean it still feels slow now but honestly I can’t describe how it feels at the beginning. It’s torture willing each day past just to mark it off. Please please try and remember symptoms are bullshit sometimes too. I had them with my mmc and I know lots on here did too. In those early days I found my symptoms cane and went, which was a head f*ck to say the least but I’m pretty sure that normal people without a worry wouldn’t notice it’s only hat we are over anaylysing every single damn thing! Good luck, you’re doing great.

@hayleyfx That's a wonderful line! Sometimes it just takes a day or two's jump in hormones to really get things going

@NoCatsHere I hope you do!

@DBoo I'm sure they add a secret thousand years on top of your normal dates in the early weeks.

Actually I had stronger symptoms with my 6-week baby (sac kept growing a bit so might be different) than my other pregnancies. Not sure whether it's because it was my first so just wasn't used to it but I guess you really can't tell what it means. Some feel right as rain throughout it and it works out though right?

Thank you. That's why this thread is a life saver. I know im being stupid. Im darely even pregnant yet but its just on my mind all the time.

I think it makes it harder cos your life completely changes overnight but because you dont tell anyone you have to put a front on.

I went for drinks with my friends yesterday and obviously stuck to lemonade and had to fabricate a stupid story about having to drive somewhere later on. Dp and i were mid argument when my dm phoned and i must have sounded psycho because i was angry and upset at dp because he went out for a few friday night and came in quite drunk then had plans to go out last night which i thought was for an hour but the more he talked to more i realised it was going to be longer than that.

With my last pregnancy dp was an absolute arsehole and very nearly broke us. He drank all the time and caused arguments and i honestly thought i would never put myself through that again. He has had a big life change the last six months and barely drinks so it felt to me lile i fall pregnant and cant do anything then he suddenly finds something in him to start going out. Grrrr. I know its probably hormones and i should forget the past but it really brought it all back. He stayed in in the end.

I'm ok, third trimester is kicking in with a vengeance! Unfortunately FIL has died so we've had to rush home which is pretty stressful but everything is ok with the baby.