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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

When to have a baby shower / reveal party?

62 replies

JessicaJones1 · 06/04/2018 21:14

I'm hoping to have a little party to reveal the sex of our baby and was wondering when others have had or plan on having theirs? How long should I wait?

OP posts:

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crimsonlake · 06/04/2018 21:18

I am sorry but does anybody care apart from the parents to be?

Bixx · 06/04/2018 21:20

Please don’t have a reveal party. They’re so cringy.

KimchiLaLa · 06/04/2018 21:21

Have a baby shower, don't have a reveal party. Honestly no one cares.

PalePinkSwan · 06/04/2018 21:22

Are you in USA? If not please don’t have a reveal party, they are so so pointless and cringe.

isthismummy · 06/04/2018 21:23

Baby showers are tacky enough (are we all Americans now?) but please don't have a reveal party. It's just cringe and nobody outside of your immediate family gives a hoot about whether you're having a boy or a girl.

Original poster

JessicaJones1 · 06/04/2018 21:25

I was thinking the same crimsonlake but was chuffed to bits to discover my mum, sister, cousin, aunty and two of my friends are really excited about the pregnancy and are very up for celebrating.

It would only be something small (not a party as such) but just a way of celebrating getting this far after so many years. A great excuse to have a bit of a get-together for anyone that does care.

OP posts:

zaalitje · 06/04/2018 21:26

I didn't.

I'm with the other posters here, it's naff.

I've told people who've asked the gender but I think 90% of those who asked were just being polite.

squiglyline · 06/04/2018 21:30

@JessicaJones1
My MIL wants me to have a reveal party. My mums going to be away the day after we find out so we’re doing a dinner for our parents, really anyone else who wants to be part of it but will really just be immediate family and best friend. It will be more like a family dinner then we are getting one of those cannon things that pop the colour to do with pudding.
I totally get celebrating getting this far after so long ttc in the first place. I’m only 13 weeks and we’ve had 4 scans already. Will have had 6 by the time I’m 16 weeks.

mrsb06 · 06/04/2018 21:30

I don't think the OP was asking if she should have one. She was asking when.

Granted, they aren't really my cup of tea but if you want one, go for it. I don't think timescales really matter. Maybe you could do it around the 32ish week mark (when not long to go but not that you're too big and puffy to care ) as a joint baby shower/gender reveal thing? Please refrain from telling me it's 'sex' and not gender, as these things are typically
called 'gender reveals.'

Millypad · 06/04/2018 21:31

@jessicajones1 If you want one, you have one. I know my immediate family would love something like that, it would make them feel involved and make the whole thing even more exciting. As for showers, my bf had gets around 35 weeks. I’m only at 10 so cant offer personal experience, am afraid!

cablewable · 06/04/2018 21:38

Arrr don't be such a miserable bunch. It's great, a chance to have a get together with something magical in between. Go for it.... and 3/4 of the way through ( at least you can prepare)
A friend of mine did a cake for her family. She already had 2 boys and everyone presumed it would be another boy, she was so excited to tell them it was going to be a girl.

RosaBaby2 · 06/04/2018 21:38

Why are some people so negative? It is possible that some people’s families and friends are actually really excited about there being a new baby, why is that so hard to believe?

I’ve no suggestions on when for gender reveal, however I have had a baby shower at 34 weeks held and organised by friends, and have another also held and organised by friends/family coming up at 38 weeks. I wasn’t bothered either way but they wanted to!

Congratulations and enjoy!

LeighaJ · 06/04/2018 22:30

Most baby showers I've been to took place about 6 to 8 weeks before due date. I know that some hate these too but I've always viewed them as a nice way to support first time parents or not first time parents but a different gender baby.

I've never been to a gender reveal party...gotta admit the idea makes me cringe too.

My Mom was super excited to know gender as were a few others, but I just subtly used "she" when talking about the baby and then let my Mom get on with her OMG excitedness. She has 3 grandsons from my sister, this is her first granddaughter.

harrietm87 · 06/04/2018 23:44

Can you have a get together without calling it a baby shower or reveal party? (And so avoid the stupid games, grabby present requests?)

I agree it's lovely to celebrate a new arrival with family (though personally waiting until the baby is actually born), I just think the American "traditions" people are bringing over here are tacky. Also re the "reveal", realistically no one will care, even close family - surely they'll be hoping you have a healthy baby and will be delighted whatever the sex?

If you're set on something like this,
I'd suggest early in the third trimester - close ish to due date but you won't be massive and exhausted. Though if you're finding out the sex at 20 weeks and want to tell a load of people in one go then maybe you'll find that too long to wait.

Mamabear1475 · 06/04/2018 23:49

I agree they are a bit cringy and I wouldn't have one myself. But my family were super excited when I got pregnant so I could have had one and they probably would have enjoyed it.
I would have it at about 25 weeks, so people have time to buy gifts when they find out what your having. And so your not too big and knackered that you won't enjoy it yourself. Have fun xx

Buxbaum · 07/04/2018 08:53

It is possible that some people’s families and friends are actually really excited about there being a new baby, why is that so hard to believe?

And yet it’s also possible for families to be actually really excited about the new baby without needing a vulgar reveal of the child’s biological sex. Imagine that.

OP, to answer your question, around 30 weeks if you must. I would strongly recommend paying for a private scan to qualify the first sonographer’s opinion. Sexing opinions are wrong more often than you might think.

Sushirolls · 07/04/2018 09:39

@JessicaJones1 my daughter is having her baby shower when she will be 30 weeks. Her BF's family aren't local, so it will be a chance for both sides of the family to meet & celebrate the upcoming birth of my GC.

They will also be revealing if they're having a DS or DD at the same time, as her BF wants to tell his mum in person rather than over text/phone & won't have the opportunity before then, and doesn't feel it fair for others to know before her - so we shall all find out at the same time.

I hope you have a fantastic day

Markygirl1995 · 07/04/2018 09:48

I'm have a reveal party... I couldn't careless if people cared or not if someone wants to have them then they should. Some woman on here are so moody

MrsDx · 07/04/2018 10:36

Sooooo negative. Leave her alone it’s not a controversial/moral/ethical debate it’s a bloody party to celebrate a baby! We need more tacky/cringy things in life have you seen how bloody miserable the world is these days? Chill out women 😂

QueenAravisOfArchenland · 07/04/2018 10:40

Please, never. It's tacky, grabby, and the last thing we need is to further foster the idea that a child's biological sex tells you anything much of importance about them and what they will be like.

Have a get-together of friends and family by all means but just call it a party and tell them the sex if they ask.

happymummy12345 · 07/04/2018 10:44

Have neither. Baby showers are tacky and grabby. Reveal parties are worse than that.

AsAProfessionalFekko · 07/04/2018 10:48

Does everyone find out the babies sex before birth?

1haudyerwheesht · 07/04/2018 10:51

I think it's odd. I found out the gender of my baby after I'd given birth to her!

AsAProfessionalFekko · 07/04/2018 10:53

Me too but we thought it was going to be a boy, and he was.

OldBandTeeShirt · 07/04/2018 10:57

By all means have a get-together. Celebrations are nice. But there's something so pompous about sex reveal parties, and treating the 'revelation' of whether a baby is a boy/girl as though it's the result of a crucial political referendum that will determine the fate of all humankind.

Though maybe the results of referenda should be shot out of a cannon in different colours or indicated by all political leaders slicing into a cake with different-coloured fillings (Red for 'passed', blue for 'didn't pass'...?)

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