Arguments over pink pram!

[Summerbaby2018]

So I am either going to get icandy or egg but found out the icandy colour I wanted ( butterscotch) is being discontinued so that's left me stranded I don't want a black pram for a girl as I'm girly myself but my partner refuses to push a pink pram? Has anyone else's partner felt the same or is mine just being an arse as usual about decisions? I wanted to go for this one

Yes just checked back...basically he doesn't want to push it as it's pink and he would feel emasculated. The original question was is that fair and is he being a wuss about it.

She didn't say originally that he didn't want the baby to be gender stereotyped. I think someone else jumped the stereotyping gun and it span off target from there....

But it’s only because of gender stereotyping that he would feel “emasculated” pushing a pink pram. So it was relevant from the beginning.

@Summerbaby2018

I'm a tad busy to read through all the posts, got as far as DP not being interested in girl stuff because he wanted a boy.

I was adamant that ds3 was a girl, I just felt it. I had a name, walked around girl isles and couldn't wait. Finding out he was a boy made me go through a little bit of heartbreak. DP has a vasectomy so I knew I was never going to get my girl and I honestly went into a little period of mourning for something I never had and never will have.

DS3 popped out and that feeling went away so fast, I looked at him feeling so stupid that I wanted him to be something else. He was perfect, winkle and all!

Your problem isn't that pram (which isn't to my taste) but feeling your DP is rejecting anything feminine because he doesn't want your girl.

He will most probably snap out of it the minute he looks into her eyes. But as silly as it sounds, going through gender disappointment isn't an unheard of thing. For now I would just get a different pram, he probably just dislikes the in your face pinkness and I'm not saying you have to pander to his gender disappointment but I can see where he's coming from.

Plus your having a baby, it's really not a boy or girl for sure until it's out so don't spend £1000 on something so gender specific. My sister has 2 DDs that spent their first two years in a blue nursery, a blue pram, blue baby grows etc due to a wrong gender scan. They also have boy inspired names, Harrie and Georgie, as she was set on them. Sorry gone a little off topic there!

Mmmmm....ok. I'll take it as tenuous but I think you know that wasn't what OP was asking for an opinion on. It still doesn't deserve people to rip in the way they did. We can civilised without resorting to being mean.

People could have just said 'to be fair I think most men would prefer not to have a pink pram in the same way you want a girlie pram for fair enough reasons that it isn't a very 'manly' colour-maybe you could find a middle ground?' and left it at that!

As for gender stereotyping, asking him not to feel emasculated for pushing a pink pram when op wants it because she thinks it's girly means that gender stereotypes exist to them. That's not something an Internet forum post will change, so no. Get a gender neutral pram as you're both BU by hating/wanted pink based on your own assumptions of gendered colouring

1. The pram is tacky in pink
2. If he feels emasculated I'd be worried he was secretly gay
3. The amount of "ect" in this thread made my eyes bleed.

HereYou, what is "ect"?

To a Dad, a pram might come into the category of a gadget, like a car really, so not something to have in pink from that view point.

"so not something to have in pink from that view point"

Why not?

@BertrandRussell OP has admitted she wants it because it's girly. Why can't he not want it on those grounds?

Yes they are both silly, but equally so and therefore his rejection of it is equally justified

I sympathise with OP as I had a mother who always suppressed my 'pinkness'. People can want to be girly, and have their girl baby be the ultimate expression of that. I sometimes see mothers who give that mood free rein and feel envious more than anything. Lots of people, loved "Legally Blond" for the same reason probably.

In this case though, first I would want DH to be happy too (& don't see why he should be different from most men/not be a gender stereotype over this); and in practice the pram would get dirty.

But it’s only because of gender stereotyping that he would feel “emasculated” pushing a pink pram. So it was relevant from the beginning

you don't know thats why he doesn't want it.
But even if he doesn't want to push it because its too girly for him, how is that not allowed but OP wanting to push it purely because it is girly is just fine?
You can't have it both ways.

Surely the reason that its fugly is good enough reason?

@TooManyMiles people who can't spell "etc" as in et cetera

Not people. I've checked and its just Op.

We have a pink pram, originally my husband was a bit about it. But I've got to be honest I wear the trousers in our relationship so we got it.

I was main user, and still am. He didn't mind it in the end, it didn't affect his masculinity!

Ah well. I tried 😂 sorry OP.

Pink is fine just be aware of the bigger picture.

www.facebook.com/ABCiview/videos/1753000491389255/

@holycheeseplant I don't think that video applies to this?

My DD has a pink pram, her coat is Blue, she is currently wearing PJ's with dinosaurs on.

I don't think that buying a pink pram effects them in the way this video suggests

It's just part of the wider picture. To sniff at genderstereotyping is to dismiss the eventual issues it can lead to. It's just wise to be aware.

That is an interesting video Cheese.