Slightly controversial, but are you expecting a gift after you give birth?

[allthecheese]

Appreciate the concept of 'push presents' is a little tacky. But after 9 months of carrying your baby, dealing with sickness and piles and varicose veins and weird cravings and people commenting on your body...are you expecting a gift from your partner? And if so, what?

I have to admit I'll be a little upset if my DH doesn't get me anything, but I'm not after an eternity ring with massive stones or anything crazy. Something like a simple gold pendant necklace.

Agree that the best 'present' was an equal partner who pulled his weight, took care of me and really appreciated what I'd gone through. My mum got me presents for giving her grandchildren but then she is a shopping addict. I wouldn't expect gifts..

ugh, no, actually to me it seems to cheapen the whole thing, I think I would be a little offended, like I was being paid for a service or something (and if I was being paid a golden pendant would be insultingly cheap!!)

Push presents?! I have never heard that phrase before but reading it makes me feel a bit...yuck. I cannot imagine being disappointed about a lack of present. Seriously, if it crosses your mind when you are holding that precious new little person then you need to give your head a wobble.

I got a present from my husband after each of our children were born. He got both of them because he wanted to not because I'd asked and they were so nice to receive. Also it's not a new thing, my mum and friend's mum's got presents from their husbands after their babies were born 30+ years ago

I don’t really expect one but some flowers or chocolates would be a lovely thought

Dodn't occur to me tbh (nor DH, evidently).

Didn’t expect anything but after being at the birth my husband bought me a diamond and sapphire ring. I smile every time i look at it and i never take it off

You're setting yourself to be upset. It's really not the done thing. If you really want one you need to ask for one. I doubt you'll care once your baby has arrived though.

I had a shit pregnancy (gestational diabetes, pre-eclampsia, endless uti's/constant antibiotics for the third trimester due to my kidneys swelling, kidney pain and a breech baby needing a c-section). I was in and out of hospital and signed off from work at 34 weeks. I didn't deserve a present. Yes it can be shit being pregnant but the baby is the reward!

I did. Not hugely expensive but something symbolic. Damn right, I deserved it.

I'm another one who doesn't get anniversary presents, doesn't really need birthday presents and has a tenner spent on me at xmas. Not having to get up and pour my own wine means more.

My dh bought me flowers with all 3 of ours.
I didn't expect it, but he wanted to do it.
Your baby will consume all your energy and thoughts, you won't be bothered by material things.

A smoked salmon and cream cheese bagel!

He drove home and made it and brought it back to the hospital. Was the most welcome present ever after not being able to eat one for 9 months. (They're my favourite).

All I want is a maccies cheeseburger. The bloody food in hospital was dire and last time I was stuck there for 3 days.

Didn't expect anything.
Didn't receive anything.
Wasn't disappointed.

@cleanandtidyhouse, I'm so sorry you avoided them for 9 months, but (in the uk at least) smoked salmon, cream cheese and bagels are all absolutely fine for pregnant women to eat.
I probably had them weekly through pregnancy.

The baby.

Why should you get a gift just because you carried the baby.
Very poor taste!

My baby girl was stillborn last month at 26 weeks. Wtf is wrong with people that they feel they expect more than a healthy baby. She would have been the best gift in the world to my DH and I. Not a pendant / handbag / etc etc (Sorry but you’ve really touched a nerve here)

iamchanging I'm so so sorry for your loss, and fully agree.

I didn’t think that I needed patronising in that way.

Good God - you would feel patronised if your husband bought you a gift?
FML, I must be doing something wrong because I sure as hell didn't feel patronised...

eh?

Iamchanging so sorry xxx

Agreed genever! It was my birthday last Friday and DH has forgotten to get me a birthday card from him or our young DC or a present. We were in Scotland on a trip and it abs lately didn’t matter, I had everything I needed and wanted. He felt really guilty and wanted to run out and get some birthday ‘things’ but I just wanted him in bed with me so we ordered room service and had a lazy morning. I don’t need stuff, just a kind respectful man. I don’t expect gifts for just existing, if I desire something I’ll get it myself. We have so much to appreciate in life yet we drown it all in ‘stuff’