October 2004 - Moose massive, part 3

[beansprout]

Does anyone want to come and play here? There's loads of space!

Turtle - you poor thing, your back pain sounds horrendous.

I had another positive thought last night, it was this.... whatever life holds post baby arrival, things will be so much easier because you will not be pregnant anymore. Back pains will go, as will heartburn and all the other discomfort of carrying a baby around. Trust me, however much you're strung out, just being able to lie down on your back, feel your ribs and take a really deep breath feels absolutely gorgeous.

My big baby ceasarean could very easily have been more as a result of malpositioning (op - spine to spine) than simple enormousnous, although enormousness won't have helped. I will be mightily cheered if this baby is head down and ready to go, as the way I see it, even if big for dates, (which it actually doesn't seem to be currently) it might have beautifully positioned highly moldable head, and therefore not cause a terrific amount of trouble.

sorry turtle - didn't quite answer your question before. It wasn't until I was a week over that a midwife said the baby was big. I was induced at 16 days over, and it didn't work well for me, pain being exacerbated as it was by the baby's bad position, and progress not being made. hope that helps. Basically induction might be worth a shot if you are panicking about size, but I wouldn't do it unless positioning is good.

btw everyone, mentioned general anxiety levels to osteo and he said bach flower remedies are fine in pg. Might dig out my rescue remedy.

Now I know why no-one walks around with a cannon ball strapped to their belly

Thanks for reassurance Flo, I feel a bit more back on track today. Toots, I too have been really looking forward to getting my body back. Ahhh, to lie on my stomach or for it not to hurt when I turn over/stand up etc...! I was getting quite excited about it last night!

Beanie was really thrashing about yesterday and me and dp had a moment of clarity/wierdness and sat there saying "my god, there is actually a little PERSON in there!!!". Doh!

Mine's more of a watermellon than canonball. Maybe you're having a boy!!

Back seems slightly better today, based on the fact that I have done very little but have a pedicure/manicure for impending holiday

Baby is face down and head down so in the right position for induction if it comes to that, however baby could move quite a bit in weeks to come.

Toots was having a c-section so much worse than vaginal? I guess you need go have the vaginal to tell, was your post-op horribly painful?

I am keeping open minded as much as possible.

Off to Sorrento tomorrow to do very little but waddle back and forth to the pool and restaurant and put feet up.

Thanks to you all for the kind words

Here's a wierd one.....I have had pain only in my left breast during pg??? nothing in right breast, I think they are both growing at the same rate but left one hurts so much more? They feel huge by the way. Anyone else experience that?

Hi everyone. Hope you are all ok.

I have to go and write a birth plan this week. A friend of mine hadn't heard of this, so I described it as a "living will". Things haven't got off to a good start though as dp came over all queasy yesterday when I cut my leg shaving. This does not bode well!

Beansprout's birth plan:
a) short
b) painless please

Hi all.

Good on you Beansprout. Very hard to be in denial while writing your birth plan!

It's official. I am absolutely knackered. All the time. Shattered. In tears with it. Plonked dd in her cot today with some books, and got twenty minutes kip which really helped.

Write soon all of you. I need to hear from you!

Hi everyone

Toots can you find somebody to look after your DD in the afternoons and give you a rest? I am also constantly tired, I need a nap a lot more than DS. Luckily he still naps in the afternoon although he is beginning to resist it. I tell him he needs it to make his brain grow - actually it's to stop mine from shrinking any more! Today we went to the gym, he went to the creche and I went to the cafe to have a coffee....

Bean I have not thought at all about birth plan this time round - have to admit last time it all went out the window - although I think we are still in denial mode on this thread about the birth process??? Only 8 wks to go! DH has suggested we make a list of what we really need to do but needless to say we have not done anything yet.

Now, should I schedule my last seminar at work for the day before I am due to go on maternity leave? This apparently is the only day my director is free....

Hi all - can I join the thread (all be it very late!!).?
I'm due 24 October and I think last night was the first time that I actually realised that the little monkey that I have inside has to come out somehow! Then spent most of the night awake thinking about the prospect!
Am also feeling very tired and most afternoons am fallinf asleep in front of the olympics - then DH rings to see how I am and wakes me up - I am sure he thinks I am spending all my mat leave in bed .
Anyway that's me - hope to get and give (!) lots of support to all of you.

Bellie

Morning all,
I am in denial too - like you I don't really want to think about the details of Boo coming out, and when I do I end up a gibbering mess or asleep (as I go to bed to be a gibbering mess in comfort).

Went to see The Village last night and dreamt about creatures in the woods all night long - I am SO easily spooked! I enjoyed it, although many said the end isn't v good, I am totally sucked in by films and never go clue-hunting anyway (not even sure my tiny brain is capable anymore).

My week off work has left me rested and a bit calmer as I got a lot done at home, just need to get hospital bag ready now - what are you guys taking? I've got essentials like nice towels (in charcoal grey), flip flops for shower, maternity pads, disposable knickers, stuff for baby, big comfy clothing for me, toiletries - am I missing something important?

Hi all,
I had my ante-natal refresher class last week in the hospital. The scheme I am using is probably similar to the UK midwife-led system. I plan to give birth in the hospital and come home (yikes!) within 12 hours. On my other births I stayed in 3/4 nights so this will be very different.

Needless to say I have not packed a jot but I finish work this week so it is off to the shops on Monday for essentials:
-arnica tablets (take once labour is over as it helps with bruising)
-big comfy knickers (as cheap as disposable and much easier to put on if you have chunky thighs)
-comfy pj's and slippers
-new mattress and sheets for moses basket
-arrange to rent TENS machine

Also need to get DH to take down the baby boxes from the attic to sort through what we have. Vests will not be an issue as both my mother and my MIL have gone and bought small baby vests - I reckon we now have about 20+ in newborn to 3 months!!!

I am being philosophical about the labour - I know it hurts like hell (I asked DH to kill me at one stage last time round but I was actually dilating really quickly) but I also know the delivery was really beautiful, everything slowed down and I was actually chatting to the midwives between the 'pushing' contractions. Delivering your baby is really the most incredible thing and it is worth the pain that comes beforehand.

Forgot to say welcome Bellie!
I know what you mean about the phone calls that wake you, I remember last time on ML before DS was born I would settle down for a mid-morning nap when invariably the phone would ring. If I ignored or disconnected it, the caller would then try my mobile!

Good to hear from you all and welcome to Bellie!

Am not sleeping again and so am feeling very wobbly indeed today. Only have 6 weeks to go and the "cute bump" days are long gone. I'm rapidly becoming a liability. Can't believe I still have 3 weeks of work to go too!!

It's so great to have you lot too. I keep finding that if I tell someone I feel anxious about the arrival of Bean, I am met with "oh it will be great, you will be fine" etc etc which I know is well intentioned but yesterday I just had a day where I felt like nobody could hear me scream!

Thanks for your comment about it all being worth it Miffy - I need to hear that at the moment! Flo - when does your mat. leave start?

Awww Bean,

Know what you mean about no one being able to hear you scream - feeling helpless and lost? I know I am. I'm having panic days of " I can't do this, I don't want to do this, I'm not ready to do thisand I simply won't do it, so there!" Why don't the books have chapters titled "How To Deny Your Denial"? And why isn't morphine readily available to birthing women?

My biggest worry is that DH won't be able to help me during labour - it's going to hurt and he can't help or make it stop or go away and no one can tell me how to make it better, short of riding it out. Scared, scared, scared. Was told it was almost like doing a never-sure-when-it's-going-to-end circuit training class - you just have to keep going through the pain until it's over, no matter how long that is. I HATE circuit training. Loads. and at badly designed human body. Why can't the linea nigra turn into a zip or a pouch type apparatus, kangaroo style? I might endeavor to evolve that in my next life.

Morning all, and welcome Bellie!

I would say, take some bottles of water and fruit juice in your hospital bag, as maternity wards are always very hot. Also it helps get things moving post birth, if you know what I mean! And being a greedy sort, I would say take lots of snacks for afterwards. I've posted this before on Mumsnet, but after I had DD2, I was so hungry, and it was evening so the canteen etc was shut. They did give me tea and toast, but I could have eaten a whole loaf of toast! I was one of the first in the breakfast queue the next day

I thought the baby was coming on Saturday, which was very scary. I'd had another tummy upset and then started getting contraction type pains. As baby isn't due for 10 weeks, I was starting to panic, but the pains eased off and on Sunday I felt fine. I must sort the mess that is the baby's room (currently houses ironing, a stepladder and a lot of junk) and find some small size baby clothes, just in case!

Sorry some of you are feeling wobbly and scared. Not sleeping definitely doesn't help these feelings. I'm still doing quite well at putting the actual birth from my mind, but most of you are due before me, so I can quite see why you are worrying.

Hi All,
Yes still in denial here. In Germany they don´t do birth plans or not that I`ve come across, so it means I can stay in denial a bit longer. Mind you if you want and epidural (which I do) you have to speak to an anethetist and sign consent forms way before the birth. They don´t think you´re in a rational state of mind during labour to make an informed decision. So I´m off next week to malke sure I get my form signed.
Bibiboo - make sure you pack lots of delicious snacks. You probably won´t feel like eating them during the birth, but you´ll be starving afterwards and unless you´re very lucky the hospital food will be disgusting.
Beansprout- Can´t believe you´ve still got 3 weeks of work and are not sleeping. Is there any chance you could finish earlier if you had to? Without a daytime nap I´d be going crazy by now.
Bellie- welcome, I love the name.
As Miffy says it really is so worthwhile at the end.

Bibi - totally understand everything you are saying. I agree that there seems to be a distinct lack of information on how to deal with just how terrifying this whole prospect is, and that's if it all goes ok! God forbid something should go wrong! I seem to be either stuck (fixated) on the birth, and the fear of that, or, overwhelmed by everything that comes afterwards. Chuck in a smattering of horrible-things-that-could-happen and I turning myself into a nervous wreck here!! I need to get a grip - but how?!! Rational Bean seems to have left the building!!

Are you ok now Cerys? That must have been scary stuff!

Well denial is definately the order of the day here. My buggy has arrived (5 days from the States I was well impressed). But that is precisely it on the preparation stakes - Tuesday is my child free day, I've read a magazine and surfed the net. The study which needs to miraculously swap rooms with the nursery (a room less than a 3rd of it size) so I can fit 2 cots in one room is still full of crap - I did give my mum 4 books last night, can that count as starting to get the room ready. Given I want DD to move in before the baby comes and i've got 6 weeks to go I think the time to get a move on could be looming large. As my previous 2 have been spring babies I think I may need to look at the clothing situation.
Ds had his op on Saturday so at least that is out of the way, went ok apart from him being sick all over me in the hospital and in my car on the way home - anyone got good get rid of sick smell tips?

Geogteach - really glad ds's op went ok, but sorry, I don't have have any sick smell tips!
My nesting to date has mostly involved sorting out books too. Attempts to buy things are being thwarted (TS out of stock, e-bayers not delivering etc) but will press on. It's going to be so weird not being at work, that I sort of want to leave all this stuff so I have something to do, but at the same time, I should be aware that Bean could put in an appearance at any time, so I need to be ready - eek!!

Hi everyone

Hey no birth wobbles please! Chances are most of us will have a relatively straightforward birth, which unfortunately will hurt like hell, but which luckily hormones will erase over time. Actually there was a time when they did knock women out (Queen Victoria was a guinea pig) and it worked surprisingly well - one reason why some people think you shouldn't actually do any pushing. IMO the best thing is to have an open mind - lots of things might happen and if you might go in thinking epidurals are evil and Caesarians the work of the devil, you could be really really depressed if you do need one.

Geogteach what buggy did you order? DH came home the other day with brochures for a 7-seater car (Renault Grand Scenic) - his excuse being we will need the space. This is so far the extent of his birth preparation...

Bean, I am planning to start maternity leave either the 3rd or 4th week of September - haven't really decided yet. At the moment I find going to work a bit more relaxing than home, aside from commute and the fact that I can't really nap! Trying to decide whether to splash out and hold onto my nanny for a few days a week until maybe Xmas time - is anyone else with toddlers planning to keep going with nursery?

BTW as a nod to nesting instinct I've ordered a breadmaker. Is this weird?

Florence, Breadmaker isn't weird - I've been overcome with the need to bake for the whole office. Scones, sponge cakes, you name it I've been baking it. Seems to keep them happy and the work away from my in tray... :o

Can I ask if anyone has had some proper advice re what the deal is with Raspberry leaf tea/tablets and when is safe to take them? I'm totally confused, this is what i've heard/read so far:

Midwife: Vague answer of "well, advice differs and not really sure they help mutter, mutter mutter..."

RLT Tablet packet: Do not take before 28 weeks of pg

Book 1: Take in last 4 weeks of pg

Book 2: Can be taken from week 32 of pg

Magazine: Take when you have about 6 weeks of your pg left

I am 32 weeks but too scared to take them now, but not sure if I wait utnil 36 weeks if they will do any good...help..?

Bibi - you ARE a domestic goddess, and I am impressed! My nesting is more the cleaning variety, although naturally I am munching for England too. Am just hungry all the time!

Had a 'mare yesterday as spent an hour with dsd who told me, categorically, that we don't have the right to have this child and that we should have spoken to her first (!!) What's more, she "found" my pregnancy test before we told her, i.e. has been snooping through my things.
Great! We were in a coffee bar and she was shouting and crying. It was pretty grim, have to say. I'm actually ok with all of this today, but I was pretty upset last night. And so it goes on...

Bibi - I am as lost on Raspberry Leaf tea as you are - is it worth a thread. The wisdom of MN will always provide...

Hope everyone else is well. Thanks for birth reassurance Flo! Am 34 weeks today and all positive birth vibes are gratefully received!

Bean, have emailed you. But you know she's got no right to deny you - that is you, individually, not DP - a life and the fulfilment of being the fab mother you are going to be.

Beansprout, can only echo MI's wise advice. You know you have the right to have a baby and fulfilling life with your DP, and your DSD is out of line, esp snooping through your stuff. Sounds horribly stressful - makes my battles with DS over whether to eat his broccoli and peas somewhat trivial.

Re RLT have no idea - I did actually drink the stuff last time, but can't say it made any difference!

Florence - I am hoping we can afford for DD2 to continue at day nursery 3 days a week when baby arrives. DD1 will be at school all day and I would like to be able to spend time with new baby and try and breastfeed without DD2 climbing all over me. She will be with me weekends and 2 other days, so I am ignoring "friends" who say I should be keeping her home with me while I'm on maternity leave. I would quite like some time to nap, if I get the chance!
Bean, sorry about your dsd . Bibi, I took raspberry leaf tablets from about 35 weeks last time, but DD2 was born the day after her due date, so it didn't speed anything up for me.
Geogteach, when DD1 was sick in the car, I think we used upholstery cleaner and lots of Febreze. The smell lingered and we realised there was a bit of dried sick at the back of the seat where we couldn't see it. The smell did go in time, honest!