Fed is Best!!!!!!

[HotDawg123]

If you choose to breast feed - good for you
If you choose to bottle feed - good for you
But if you choose to be a breast feeding warrior and look at those who choose to bottle feed as scum then I hope you slip in dog shit tomorrow.

The amount of horrible women I've come across who are like this is too many now. And as I am heavily pregnant and have hormone rage it is really pissing me off.

Thank you for listening.

This has been done so many times OP. You won't change anyone's minds...every parent does what they feel is best or what it's possible for them to do. No need for your nasty post at all. You have a go at people judging and criticizing your choice... but do EXACTLY the same thing to women who BF.

All very boring.

"Someone reported me. I can guess how they fed their baby"

I don't need to try. Anyone with sense can read it in your posts.

Toodle-ooo.

Whilst I agree with you OP about personal choice, I don't think it's necessary to be quite so rude. In life, you will meet people with different opinions to your own. Political, social, you name it. But for some reason someone stating a preference to breastfeeding a baby, seems to get everyone so angry. You don't agree? Fine move on.

Personally, I BF my first DS and plan to BF my second when they arrive. I've read up on both bottle and BF and strongly believe there are additional health benefits to BF, over and above bottle feeding. However, I really couldn't care less how anyone else feeds their baby. Do what the hell you want. Like I said at the beginning- it's personal choice.

I FF. But I do not dispute that breast is indeed best. I couldn't do it as I am on powerful medication. I was gutted. It upsets me daily. But I do not mind if a bf mum claims breast is best. Because it is.

I do find it annoying that there is an assumption that if you do breastfeed you think you are superior. It is divisive. I don't think having an interest in other people is by default critical. When I have a five year old I will very much be interested in what other five year olds are eating. If you feed your child formula then I might be interested in what drives that decision, I will happily tell you what pros and cons I weighed up in deciding to breastfeed. I'll also tell you why we chose the car we did, or the kitchen layout, without thinking that yours is much worse and you are a bad person.

Not sure why you posted this here. why not in infant feeding. I agree it's goady. the number of women who physically cannot breastfeed is small. women need to be given all of the facts so they can make an informed decision. this includes the fact that breastmilk is better for babies than formula. Not giving out this information to avoid upsetting women who can't breastfeed is absurd.

if a woman wants to breastfeed but can't they should be given the appropriate support to try if they want to. if they can't or choose not to no one should judge them for this but equally suggesting someone is breastfeeding warrior etc purely because they point out the facts about breastfeeding and indeed starting an aggressive thread on a pregnancy board is IMO goady.

go over to AIBU if you want a heated debate.

I know a couple of women just like the op describes, in RL. One has a business selling lactation cookies, and her FB is a constant stream of how utterly amazing BF is (which it is, let's be honest). But she bashes formula and posts memes about how much worse off poor formula-fed children are She is really judgy.

Another woman has admitted that seeing newborns with a bottle of formula in their mouths makes them feel physically sick !

I bf'd dc1 for a few months, but dc2 was pretty impossible as I was in a coma.

Try not to get so wound up by them OP. Everyone is different and entitled to their own opinion. I just shrug it off.

Fed is better than 'leaving a baby screaming and not feeding them at all' but formula is not comparable with breast milk.
It's like saying to feed your child on a completely processed diet is the same as home cooked food.
The processed food is better than the child starving but it's not the same as cooking from scratch.

I agree with everyone making the choice they feel is best for them and yes a very small percentage of women cannot breastfeed but 'fed is best' is completely untrue.

I totally agree. I didn't want to breastfeed, and proudly took my starter pack of formula into hospital.
The student midwife at an appointment I had ad 37 weeks tried to put 'I was keen to attempt breastfeeding' in my notes. I threatened to report her if she did, as it was not the case at all.
Thankfully the midwife and student midwife in the birth centre when I gave birth were supportive of my decision.
My lo was in NICU/ SCBU for 12 days. The amount of dirty looks and being made to feel bad from the nurses because I wasn't breastfeeding was untrue. I ignored it and proudly gave my son his formula.

some women cannot breast feed. Not through choice. And it may already be a sore point as to why they can't so to be told "breast is best" or patronising comments can be hurtful.

Less than 1% actually cannot breast feed for biological/mechanical reasons. And for those, the WHO states that donor milk is preferable to formula.

Sorry, can I just query the '1% of women can't breastfeed' statistic that keeps getting bandied about? It sounds like bullshit to me and is just another way of minimizing women's lived experiences and suggesting that those who ff just haven't tried hard enough, and therefore presumably don't love their babies as much as bf mothers.

I've had a few friends who attempted breastfeeding and stopped over the last few years. One had oversupply issues which exhausted her completely as the baby would not stop crying and feeding; this was followed by a really painful bout of mastitis. She went to the dr in tears. Another friend's milk didn't come in for over a week, resulting in a screaming, hungry, severely dehydrated baby who was soon hospitalized with jaundice.

I think both those women were justified and rational in choosing to formula feed after their awful experiences. Perhaps only 1% of women can't technically produce any milk at all (although even that sounds far fetched) but many women feel that they can't, or decide that it's best not to, breastfeed for a whole variety of physical, medical, emotional and psychological reasons. Whether they can produce some milk is often irrelevant - that's not the problem. And that snidey little statistic's only purpose is to make women feel like they are weak or somehow lacking if they don't push through, even when any sane cost/benefit analysis would suggest that ff is the best option for everyone involved.

That statistic says that it doesn't matter how much it hurts, or that you're so tired that you're scared you'll drop your baby; it doesn't matter that you have to go longer without essential medication, or that breastfeeding triggers memories of abuse; it doesn't matter that, as an intelligent person, you've had a good think about it and decided on balance that ff is preferable for you and your family. You can produce milk, and therefore you should produce milk. Your silly excuses, wants and needs are unimportant. And by extension, so are you - except in your capacity to feed a baby.

FartnissEverbeans 👍

I wanted to say similar, but I'm too sleep deprived from trying to feed a baby despite under-supply issues and time spent with both of us in varying states of frustration and distress. My midwife has suggested formula; there has been no mention of donor milk which I would have thought goes to preemies / poorly babies as priority.

The breast feeding network's stance is breastfeeding is normal. For most people, bf is best.

I've never met anyone who judged a formula feeding Mum but I've been openly judged for breastfeeding past a year.

The 'fed is best' campaign is shit - it's about mothers who wanted to breastfeed but got inexpert or no care at the beginning and whose babies were harmed by inadequate breastfeeding, who are now trying to get people to accept that using formula should be the first line of response when breastfeeding is hard. No - the first response to difficult breastfeeding needs to be expert, timely help.

There are risks and benefits to mothers and babies in all feeding choices. We shouldn't pretend there aren't just because it's socially convenient to do so.

Mini you've put that so well.
I'm dismayed that rather than try and improve postnatal care of mothers and babies formula is given as the solution to a failing system

I do find it annoying that there is an assumption that if you do breastfeed you think you are superior.

^ this.

I also did have comments when I was bottle feeding DC. It was extremely hurtful comments tbh.

One had oversupply issues which exhausted her completely as the baby would not stop crying and feeding; this was followed by a really painful bout of mastitis. She went to the dr in tears.

Highlighting ignorance.

What is " oversupply issues"?

Incidentally, the 'fed is best' thing started in the US with a mother who wanted to exclusively breastfeed, got inexpert help, and ended up with a damaged, severely dehydrated baby. She's now racked with guilt because she didn't want to use formula and is keen to reduce everyone's resistance to using it early on if breastfeeding is challenging. The complicated thing about the campaign is that it's set against a background where pushing formula on mums of newborns who don't actually need it (and mothers who don't want to use it) is common.

It's a shame it's become politically incorrect to acknowledge that there are disadvantages to using formula. After all, people talk freely about the challenges of breastfeeding. Why should formula feeding get off scot free?

OP you have created a straw man to fight against.

Human breast milk is the ideal food for human babies.

This idea that as long as a baby is fed then it's fine is simply not true. Over the years babies have been fed all sorts of crap.I grew up in a time when some people thought it was fine to feed babies normal cow's milk. My MIL still thinks that the best baby food is diluted evaporated milk.

Modern formula is acceptable and can be a life saver, but second place by a long shot.

The trouble is, breast is scientifically proven ti be better for babies, from a biological perspective. Doesn't mean in 100% of cases that women should breastfeed. And by knocking women who promote breastfeeding, you tend to knock women who breastfeed.

the first response to difficult breastfeeding needs to be expert, timely help.

x 100

And no -one knocks the ( mostly men) who promote formula.

The global formula industry is costing £30 billion , vast amounts are spent on advertising.

Yet anyone who dares to suggest that breastmilk is a superior food is called a nazi. breastgapo, labelled a lentil knitting hippy, eroding women's rights, ant- femininst - how did this natural biological function end up being so bad mouthed?

And by knocking women who promote breastfeeding, you tend to knock women who breastfeed.

By people making comments like I had without the facts is upsetting, ignorant and rude.