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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Get me outta here (getting discharged ASAP after birth)

81 replies

LondonRoo · 10/01/2017 10:37

Did a tour of the birthing centre and labour ward yesterday and was most surprised to hear the staff member do the tour say proudly that most first time mums stay a day or two for support after the birth as though a post natal stay was a treat.

I've just changed maternity services as moved house and the previous service generally discharged people within 6 hours of birth if all was well.

I strongly dislike hospitals (work in one) and assuming all is well my preference is to be at home, in my own space, with my own food, in peace and quiet adapting to being a new mum. Obviously if there are problems and good reasons to stay in the hospital, that's a different story... But if me and baby are well then I want to be at home.

I'd consider a home birth if this wasn't my first pregnancy but given the high transfer rates to hospital for first time mums, I think a birth centre is a good middle ground.

How long after birth did people go home? Any advice for getting out of hospital ASAP? Have a midwife appointment on Friday so going to discuss it further with her.

Roo

OP posts:

purplefizz26 · 10/01/2017 10:42

I had no complications and didn't breast feed but there didn't seem to be any rush to discharge me.

Every time I asked they said they were too busy to do my discharge notes as women needing assistance and pain relief took priority.

I ended up in the damn place for 2 nights after birth.

In the end I had to get a little arsey and demand to be discharged.

I think next time I will just be firm from the beginning and insist if there is to reason to stay, I am not staying, rather than sitting and waiting it out.

Doesn't make any sense to me to hold up a bed when for the sake of 15 minutes filling in a few bits of paper (that's all it took when I asked for the final time) you can free it up!

Not saying every hospital or every experience is like that, might have just been a particularly busy period!

Whatsername17 · 10/01/2017 10:44

I was discharged after 6 hours and I think, in hindsight, it was a huge mistake. I hadn't slept, I didn't get any help with breastfeeding and people desended on us the moment we got home. Hospitals have lactation nurses on hand which is something I plan to take advantage of this time. Plus structured visiting hours to keep well meaning but overly enthusiastic family at bay. Ultimately, the choice is yours and, once you've had your baby, you can just ask to be discharged.

Hoppinggreen · 10/01/2017 10:46

With DD I had surgery post birth so stayed 1 night but policy is a minimum of 6 hours. With DS (despite an epidural) i left after exactly 6 hours, partly because they wanted my lovely room back so I would have had to go onto the ward.
If you want to go and there's no reason not to then you can, if you've stayed for the minimum recommended they won't stop you

Snowflakes1122 · 10/01/2017 10:48

Wekk it sounds a good hospital if people want to stay longer, so that's a huge bonus.

Depends on your labour really and how you're doing post birth.

For me with my first I stayed 9 hours after birth. Went home 3pm. 2nd 6 hours or so.

LillyBugg · 10/01/2017 10:48

I went home after about 36 hours. DS was born AM, I was asked following AM about going home but was nervous to leave. I left in the PM. DS2 is due in may and this time I'm sure I'll be more confident and also will want to get home to DS1. I guess it will depend on the time of day he's born. If morning I'd hope to go home same day. If evening/night then I'd probably happily stay the night.

LizzieMacQueen · 10/01/2017 10:50

When it comes to it you may be glad there's not a speedy discharge. It takes a little bit of time adjusting to things and the comfort of knowing there are experienced midwives around can be a godsend.

Try not to stress and good luck with the birth.

ExplodedCloud · 10/01/2017 10:52

First dc was born at midday and we left at 8pm. The midwives seemed to think I was being forced to leave by DH but it was me wanting to go home to my own bed and teapot.

StillaChocoholic · 10/01/2017 10:54

I had DS at 3 AM, had a sleep, husband came back to birthing unit to pick us up and we left about 11AM. We did get asked if we wanted to leave yet as they had ordered me some lunch but we were well ready to get home.
Planned on going to the McD's drive thru for food on way home and bloody place was closed for refurbishment so in hindsight I'd have stayed an extra hour for lunch then gone

Ilovecaindingle · 10/01/2017 10:56

I had ds at 6 and and picked other ds and dd up from school at 3 pm.

My dm had actually come to stay and have them as tdh (twatdh) went to work after the birth - but she had a fall and broke her arm and was kept in so I got out before her!

Jackiebrambles · 10/01/2017 10:58

First time I was in two nights, that was after an EMCS.

My second was an ELCS and I stayed one night. DD was born at 12noon on the wednesday, I left the hospital at 5pm thursday. They were expecting me in for a second night but I couldn't stand it - the fucking noise, heat and the bloody snoring. My next door neighbour was snoring so loud she woke her baby up!

So I basically asked anyone who came near me 'when can I be discharged?' and I think they were sick of me in the end and just agreed!

I was up and walking about, had had a wee (catheterised) and was breastfeeding fine. Baby was checked and was fine so there was no reason for them to keep me really.

It does take a lot of time to get the discharge notes and drugs together.

Just keep asking!

BrieAndChilli · 10/01/2017 10:59

I guess it will depend on what time you give birth - if you give birth in the afternoon I guess you will stay in overnight.
With my first I gave birth early hours of the morning and by lunchtime was told we could go home as soon as DS1 did a poo - which he waited until 7pm to do!!
Again with DD I gave birth early hours of morning and went home at lunchtime (she was slightly jaundiced so they wanted me to stay in but agreed i could go home and just bring her back daily for a week to have blood tests)
DS2 was born late evening and we went home late morning the next day.

Jackiebrambles · 10/01/2017 10:59

I will say that being home post op after one night was hard. I felt like I'd been run over by a train. Although at least I could rest / sleep properly. I just couldn't sleep in hospital.

Duckyneedsaclean · 10/01/2017 11:10

Usually they say you're going to be discharged, but have to wait for your paperwork. I then say:

"OK, my husband will come back for my paperwork this evening. Thank you for everything, bye bye."

TiltedNewt · 10/01/2017 11:12

I was keen to get home as soon as possible but due to complications I ended up staying 10 nights. I was actually quite glad of the help and support for the first couple of days and glad to still be there. After that, I was definitely ready to come home but DS was still receiving treatment so that wasn't an option. The people I saw come and go during my stay were generally there 1 night and didn't have to kick up a fuss to leave. One woman did request to stay an extra night as she didn't feel ready.

I don't think that a stay in is punishment and if you do find yourself there you should take advantage of the experienced midwives especially if you are planning on breastfeeding. That being said, they can't force you to stay either so definitely kick up a fuss and leave if you are ready.

Primaryteach87 · 10/01/2017 11:18

Postnatal care was medieval where I had my kids. People tried to escape as soon as possible. One midwife doing all the paperwork and evil maternity care assistants bullying the mums. Awful! Remember you have not been section. You can leave with your baby anytime, no matter what they say.

HeadElf · 10/01/2017 11:22

6 nights but with twins. I couldn't wait to leave, babies could have gone home after 3nights but my blood pressure randomly shot up after the delivery and they wouldn't let me leave

Original poster

LondonRoo · 10/01/2017 11:26

Of course and I know I could leave AMA - I think the plan will be to make my preferences for getting home ASAP (which I think will be best for me and baby as I will be more relaxed and that will be better for getting breastfeeding going, sleeping snd recovering) from the outset.

Then I will politely pester if needed - I'm only 15 minutes from the hospital - honestly, if if was good to go at 3 am, I'd rather go at 3 am and get into my own bed than stay on a ward!

OP posts:

museumum · 10/01/2017 11:32

My stay in the mlu birth centre after giving birth was fab. Obviously nobody there had had surgery so it was all dark and quiet and snuggle and really bf friendly (my ds had tongue tie so I needed some help). It was nothing like the. O'Mongain and goings of the normal postNatal ward (which I also had one hellish night in due to ds having an inconclusive coombs test)

GoldenWorld · 10/01/2017 11:37

Blimey, I'm a midwife and I'm surprised they let people stay so long. Do they have a low number of deliveries? To be fair, I do work in London so it's very busy but we're desperate for the room/beds so try and get people out as quickly as possible.

If all is well, and baby isn't on observations at all, you can push to have the newborn examination as soon as possible. Does depend when you give birth though as unlikely to be anyone around to do it at night. So eg if you gave birth at 9pm most people stay till the morning but in theory you could go at 3am if you're desperate and come back that day to have it done. You don't have to wait for hearing screening as you can have that done as an outpatient.

The main thing you'll need are a little out of your control. Like being able to do a good wee post birth, not losing over 500mls blood so don't require any blood tests and baby having at least a couple of good feeds. I wouldn't be happy discharging anyone whose baby wasn't feeding well, especially a first time mum.

I actually wouldn't get too worked up about it. Birth can be so unpredictable, especially as a first time mum, that I would recommend crossing that bridge when you come to it.

Heatherbell1978 · 10/01/2017 11:39

With DS1 I arrived at the birth centre at 1.30pm and gave birth at 7pm. I stayed the night and got out early afternoon next day. I'd only just established bf and they asked me if I'd like to stay an extra night but we were very lucky and got to stay in our birthing suite overnight as the wards were full and I'd need to spend the second night in the ward so I opted to leave instead.

OwlDoll · 10/01/2017 11:56

First time I was in for two weeks. Emcs which went wrong and both me and Ds were lucky to survive. Last time I had a breech birth at 7.45am and left the hospital at 3pm. We could've left sooner but DH had to go home and pick up the car seat which we had forgotten

Hopelass · 10/01/2017 12:03

With DS1 I was out 4 hours after he was born and DS2 5 hours but only because they were short staffed. I made it clear I wanted to go home asap and although both times were late (9 and 10pm) I got home to my own bed. If everything is well there isn't any reason why you can't go home asap.

DucksSake · 10/01/2017 12:15

We had to stay in as they had to check what blood type DD was before we could be discharged, took almost 3 days.
I hated it as they sent OH home, so I was on my own with this tiny baby attempting to feed her and it was so busy I didn't get any help or guidance despite pressing the bell or finding a member of staff.
Then I got told off for taking my own paracetamol, I had been waiting for 3 hours for paracetamol from the midwife at this point.
Planning a home birth if we are lucky enough to have a second baby.

Lules · 10/01/2017 12:27

5 days but I had an EMCS and my baby had an infection and I also had problems breastfeeding (gave up in the end). While I did want to go home it wasn't that awful - I paid for a private room so my DH could stay. Also when on the second night after birth I couldn't work out breastfeeding, I was crying, my DS was crying having people there able to help at 2am was utterly invaluable.

wishparry · 10/01/2017 12:30

With my youngest I had a cesarian at 1.34pm.I really wanted to go home that day but they wouldn't let me. after a lot of nagging(and painfully walking around the ward hunched over to prove i was fine),I was allowed to go home at about 10.15 the next day after the doctor had seen me.

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