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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Get me outta here (getting discharged ASAP after birth)

81 replies

LondonRoo · 10/01/2017 10:37

Did a tour of the birthing centre and labour ward yesterday and was most surprised to hear the staff member do the tour say proudly that most first time mums stay a day or two for support after the birth as though a post natal stay was a treat.

I've just changed maternity services as moved house and the previous service generally discharged people within 6 hours of birth if all was well.

I strongly dislike hospitals (work in one) and assuming all is well my preference is to be at home, in my own space, with my own food, in peace and quiet adapting to being a new mum. Obviously if there are problems and good reasons to stay in the hospital, that's a different story... But if me and baby are well then I want to be at home.

I'd consider a home birth if this wasn't my first pregnancy but given the high transfer rates to hospital for first time mums, I think a birth centre is a good middle ground.

How long after birth did people go home? Any advice for getting out of hospital ASAP? Have a midwife appointment on Friday so going to discuss it further with her.

Roo

OP posts:

Ginger782 · 11/01/2017 04:05

Wow! Why is everyone so keen to escape the hospital so fast?
I'm in Australia so obviously a different system BUT with my upcoming birth I'll be staying for 5 nights (an elec csec in a private hospital). The rooms are huge and private, with either a pull out sofa or a double bed for husbands to stay, a little balcony overlooking the hospital gardens - and 24/7 help from midwives as I learn to feed and get rest - I can't imagine wanting to get out early!
I know in the public hospitals here discharge is a lot sooner - some women go home after 1 night, some stay a few nights - and sharing a room would definitely make you want to get out faster I think.

MrsBlennerhassett · 11/01/2017 04:12

ginger gosh id stay for five nights in that situation!! sounds lovely lol!!
I walked out because i was placed on a ward with 8 other women and babies when id been awake for three days in labour and was hallucinating!! It was boiling hot and incredibly loud. My husband was asked to leave at 10pm and there was no way i was staying on that ward alone. It was ridiculously understaffed and one nurse even told me to 'stop crying' at one point because i was just sobbing hysterically ( i was sufferring from severe PND which was spotted several weeks later) So glad i went home i really dont know what would have happened to me if i had stayed there alone over night. None of them spotted that i had PND despite the fact that i was clearly hearing things that werent there! It was so much better to be at home with my family who could actually keep an eye on me overnight.

Ginger782 · 11/01/2017 04:17

MrsB - I think the lack of support in hospitals does so much harm, particularly in those first vulnerable days! I didn't want to go to a public hospital primarily because a) I would be sharing a room and b) my husband wouldn't be allowed to stay. A lot of people think I'm a bit precious for that but then look at all of these stories of women who desperately want to get out because they are lacking privacy and support in the hospital!

Sharing a ward with 8 women and babies after that labour - I don't envy that!

Spudlet · 11/01/2017 04:23

DS was born at 2.30pm, we were sent home at 12.30am. Would have been earlier but I was a bit dehydrated so took a while to produce the required amount of wee!

SmashDemGuineaPigs · 11/01/2017 04:37

DS1 was born in hospital at 3pm, however there were no beds on the post natal ward free until 9pm so I had to wait in my non cleaneddelivery room until then. The next morning they were slow coming round to check everyone and babies so I wasn't discharged until 11am which couldn't come soon enough!
With DS2 I went to a birthday centre, he arrived at 6am on the 12th, but as DH and DS1 were at home I stayed until 11am on the 14th. All the midwives kept bringing me paracetamol, tea and biscuits and there was a chippy and a dominoes down the road, so I had the better deal!

Original poster

LondonRoo · 11/01/2017 06:45

The way I see it people differ in what they want and what works for them. I'm someone who values having my privacy and when baby comes I want to be close to my DP and have time together to figure it all out.

I don't want to be on a ward with other people and all that entails. I've been around a lot of babies and feel as confident as any new mum is ever going to and have plenty of support at home if I need it. I also have DP well prepared to play bouncer dad to keep visitors at bay until we are ready for them.

Other people find the presence of staff, on tap support and being in hospital reassuring and they should be able to have that support in the first couple of days.

Just got to do what's right for you and your family IMHO.

OP posts:

cariboo · 11/01/2017 07:04

I stayed 13 days after dd was born, but then I did almost hemorrhage to death after an emergency C-section. With ds (planned CS), I stayed for a week. I can't imagine going home within hours of giving birth, especially with a firstborn. I knew nothing of babies!

Kr1stina · 11/01/2017 09:51

Ginger -your hospital sounds lovely , I might have wanted to stay there too.

Flanderspigeonmurderer · 11/01/2017 13:19

The hospital I'm giving birth in says it has an open curtain policy. This has put me off already. I wouldn't normally sit in bed with five other strangers in the room so what is wrong with wanting a bit of privacy.

Oscha · 11/01/2017 13:28

When I had DD I felt practically a prisoner. I ended up discharging myself after 4 days because I hated it so much and they weren't actually providing any help with the feeding issues we were having, so I figured I'd be better off being at home and seeing a BF counsellor. (I was.)

When I had DS 3 years later, I had a doula and wrote on my birth plan that I wanted to be discharged as soon as humanly possible. I went in at 9pm, he was born at 11pm and I was home by 4am. Bliss!

lilydaisyrose · 11/01/2017 13:30

3 babies and 3 home water births here - if you feel as you've stated above, I think you should reconsider a home birth.

MyBreadIsEggy · 11/01/2017 13:32

I stayed 24hrs the first time just because I was induced and they had to keep checking DD every 4 hours.
Second time I gave birth at home.

everythingsfine · 11/01/2017 13:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

LondonRoo · 11/01/2017 15:34

I'm concerned about the high transfer rates to hospital for first time mums with home birth and DP has said he would find it quite anxiety provoking... But if I had a crystal ball and someone could tell me a home birth would go well then I would do it in a heartbeat!!

OP posts:

Heatherbell1978 · 11/01/2017 15:53

Ginger I'm in the U.K. (Scotland) but had a similar situation to you in that I gave birth in the birth centre (only for non medicated births) so had a suite to myself. Normal process is to then be transferred to a ward but the wards were all full and I was the only one in the birth centre that night (think there are 8 suites) so I stayed in my suite with DS on the sofa as well so he didn't have to go home. It was lovely! The next morning they said I could stay but on the ward. I couldn't imagine anything worse so went home. I'm due again in 6 weeks and fully expecting not to have the same luck again with the overnight suite!

Heatherbell1978 · 11/01/2017 15:54

DH was on the sofa obviously, not DS!

Oblomov16 · 11/01/2017 15:59

I was in for nearly a week and felt I could have been discharged after 2 or so days.

Some discharged too early; some discharge too late. what a waste of NHS money.

ineedwine99 · 11/01/2017 16:02

I gave birth the Monday at 6:12pm, waters had gone over 24 hours before so i had to stay in that night to make sure no infection plus had a catheter and episiotomy stitches, got discharged Tue 9pm, had said in the morning i'd like to go home which was approved but then they had numerous doctors checking baby as they were concerned about her neck (she's fine)
All I wanted was to get home too as i was fine, but 2 other women on my bay we're a bit nervous so opted to stay a second night

myoriginal3 · 11/01/2017 16:08

I was to be discharged on day five but asked to stay an extra night. Consultant was bemused and amused I think but agreed.

In my defence I was a single mother, breastfeeding, post emcs, no one at home to go to and had a severe case of baby blues.

I can't quite remember but I suspect he came across me in floods of tears and knew I needed some sleep.

Sparrowlegs248 · 11/01/2017 19:01

I had two nights after elcs. It was fine. This time may be longer, as they asked me last time if I had children at home, and because I didn't, said I could go. Ds will be 18 months, I will miss him a LOT but think.i will benefit from.the rest in hospital.

sarahnova69 · 11/01/2017 19:19

I had mine just before 6pm, a normal birth in the midwife led suite, and they were quite happy to discharge us both 3 hours later. I opted to stay one night to get help with baby care and feeding and we then ended up being kept in for a second as baby's blood sugar dipped JUST below the threshold of concern.

My reflections? I had a wonderful birth, but the 2 nights on the 6-bed postnatal ward were UTTER HELL. It was hot, noisy and depressing and I got no sleep at all the first night. I made liberal use of the bell and got help with every feed, but invariably I rang it 3 or 4 times, got no response, walked to the midwives station myself and someone might or might not come about half an hour later. The midwives were awful but the specialist breastfeeding support workers were better and had more time to spend.

I am shooting for a home birth next time now I know my body can cope well with birth and hope to spend no time in hospital, but I think the one night I spent in was helpful as a clueless first-time mum. I got good help with bf but was also pressured into giving formula topups which I now think were unnecessary so it could have gone either way. I also really wonder how women would have got their needs met who didn't have a partner there overnight and weren't as capable as me of going to the midwives' station and making a fuss.

Also things would have been considerably better had we had a private room, and I will insist on my 'back up' hospital allowing you to pay for a private room this time around.

insan1tyscartching · 11/01/2017 19:29

Six hours after ds we never left the delivery suite. It was great but had been warned that if ds was born after 6pm I'd need to stay in overnight. Luckily he was born at 6am so I was home at midday.

YokoUhOh · 11/01/2017 19:40

DS2 arrived at 1.50pm on a Sunday after a couple of pushes, the MW stitched me up and sent us on our way because the paed had gone home. It was lush! Important to note that it was DS2 and I was fairly confident that I'd be able to breastfeed him etc. having done so for years with DS1. Good luck!

myoriginal3 · 11/01/2017 21:31

'am shooting for a home birth next time now I know my body can cope well with birth'

What an utterly horrible and offensive statement.

myoriginal3 · 11/01/2017 21:32

My body gave birth too. You arrogant eejit.

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