Get me outta here (getting discharged ASAP after birth)

[LondonRoo]

Did a tour of the birthing centre and labour ward yesterday and was most surprised to hear the staff member do the tour say proudly that most first time mums stay a day or two for support after the birth as though a post natal stay was a treat.

I've just changed maternity services as moved house and the previous service generally discharged people within 6 hours of birth if all was well.

I strongly dislike hospitals (work in one) and assuming all is well my preference is to be at home, in my own space, with my own food, in peace and quiet adapting to being a new mum. Obviously if there are problems and good reasons to stay in the hospital, that's a different story... But if me and baby are well then I want to be at home.

I'd consider a home birth if this wasn't my first pregnancy but given the high transfer rates to hospital for first time mums, I think a birth centre is a good middle ground.

How long after birth did people go home? Any advice for getting out of hospital ASAP? Have a midwife appointment on Friday so going to discuss it further with her.

Roo

DC1 - one night (she was born at 1800 hrs though so we weren't on the postnatal ward until 2100).

DC2 - one night (but was in the USA so private room :) ).

DC3 - same day (but she was born Christmas day morning so they were keen to allow us home same day).

All vaginal, DC1 a nasty birth but nothing lasting post-delivery.

I really regret only staying one night with DC2 (my insurance would have paid for two). I hadn't established BF and he had (unnoticed) jaundice so we went home and he wouldn't feed and his jaundice got worse and we ended up back in hospital within the week. I should have stayed longer.

Going home the same day with DC3 worked because the other children were with their grandparents (and everyone was busy with Christmas Day stuff) so the three of us hid away until lunchtime the next day when we made the announcement/the other kids came home.

I too felt a huge need to rush home after each birth and it was always a bad idea: once you get home, people descend, life begins again and you have to cope, irrespective of what state you're in. All my births were after at least one (if not two) wholly sleepless nights so I was a wreck physically and emotionally. Being forced to stay in bed for another 24hrs would actually have done me the world of good.

Am currently 7wks with DC4 and will be staying in for as long as they'll let me this time. I want to be sure BF is going well and that I've had some rest before returning to the craziness of four little ones.

Play it by ear - when the time comes you may feel completely differently. I live in Germany where they keep you in for much longer - they do newborn screening tests earliest after 36 hours so it's usual to stay in for 2-3 days.

With my first (EMCS) I was glad for all the help we got from the nurses. DD couldn't latch on and I needed lots of help BFing. On the second night she spent the whole time screaming the place down and I would have had no idea what to do with her at home without any help.

Newborns tend to be quite sleepy in the first day or so after the birth. Everything is easier on the first day, yet when they wake up on the second or third day it's a whole different story!

My first day with my dd was ruined by not being discharged.

I gave birth in the evening, easy birth, just gas and air and it was all surprisingly quick. Due to a health issue I had during pregnancy they wanted me to stay in until morning to monitor me, not dd. They assured me that they'd discharge me first thing in the morning if I was ok. The night was awful, a woman who had an awful cold, coughed and sneezed all night and another woman who was receiving messages and phone calls all night without turning her phone to silent shared my bay. I had no help breastfeeding, when I asked for help the midwives held baby's head with one hand and my breast with the other, clamped the together and said that thats how it's done.

From 9 am I asked to be discharged, I wanted sleep and to google for breastfeeding help as I had no wifi or 3/4g in hospital. All day both dh and I asked to be discharged, by 8:30 pm I was so frustrated with it that I ended up acting like a stroppy teenager and demanded to be discharged, the evening staff were probably unaware that I'd wanted to go home since morning so must have thought I was mad. They weren't very friendly when we left at 11:15pm.

I'm certain that I wouldn't have been successful breastfeeding had I have stayed in an extra night. If I have another baby then I'm demanding to be discharged asap, no faffing with 'just to monitor you', if I'm as healthy after birth as I was last time then I'm going home. It was 11:30pm in the middle of winter when we got home, we live 10 minutes from the hospital. Never again.

I was sent home 4 hours after having my first because they didn't have a bed. At the time I said yeah great because I didn't want to stay but it was a mistake. I failed at b.f I had to take him into town the next day to be checked by doctor that's fun after giving birth. I stayed in with ds2. I've been asked by m.w what I would like this time and I said to stay in.

I stayed in for three nights, it was hell. I should have discharged myself after two and I will most definitely consider it this time. I would have had more help and rest at home.

I had a 6 hour discharge with my last one and thought it the best thing EVER! I've had 5 babies and have never had a good experience on the postnatal ward so wanted to get home as soon as I possibly could. I was supposed to be having a home birth but it didn't go to plan and I had to have the drip to bring on my contractions. I let them know as soon as I arrived that I'd be going home asap and she said "if I had her quickly", I had her at 2pm and was out at 8. The baby didn't even have her checks, a midwife came to do them at home the next day and we had to return to do the hearing.

About 8 hours after the birth and it was such a relief! Hospitals are very hot and I just wanted my own sofa.

I was desperate to get home with dc1... big mistake as we ended up being readmitted. I'd say don't underestimate the use of having people who know what they're doing about for those first days!

Dc2 was very different and we were home within hours, but I knew what I was doing that time!!

Day after an elective csection. Glad to be home, but missed the movable (up/down) bed and didn't like doing my own injections.

I went home 24 hours after an emergency CS. It would have been sooner but apparently I had to wait until a paediatrician could check the baby. Who knows what happens to babies born at home.

No one moved my bed anyway and I didn't have any injections. I was very hungry and thirsty in hospital so I wanted to get home as soon as I could walk.

I'm suprised at someone saying that the baby has to have two good feeds before you are allowed home. When I was in bed after the CS they wouldn't pass my baby to me to be fed because they said Bf babies don't need fed for the first 24 hours. They didn't explain how DS would know he was a Bf baby .

I stayed one night in the birthing centre with ds1, in hindsight I wish I had stayed longer (centre is in London but they encourage you to stay as long as you need in your own room with DH etc). My baby didn't breastfeed once while we were there so they showed me how to express colostrum but I wish I had stayed til I'd got some help with breastfeeding. Despite best efforts ds never learned to latch properly

This time I am going back to the same centre but will stay as long as it takes to get some help with breastfeeds. See how you feel OP but make sure you get all the support you need before you leave as it's not as easy to access back at home with visitors around you, older dcs to look after etc

I stayed for 2 nights as had to have a blood transfusion. Was so eager to get home but then could hardly walk up the stairs when I did get home. Agree the post-natal ward was awful though the tea and food was nice - would definitely take more advantage of that next time!

I had induction but with normal birth and some stitches , I stayed over night but I couldn't go to the loo due to the little bag and stitches so they had to keep me there.Was sent home next day but mostly because I knew the midwife from other days in hospital .She asked if I feel like I wanna go home and I said YES.Talk to your midwife and with the ones you will have around you after birth.Im sure you will be sent home sooner as they need the beds anyway;)).

Plus it was horrible , my baby is a sweet sleeper so she didn't cry unless she wanted food or was wet, but all the other ones in the ward plus the noise made but slamming everything by the nurses kept me awake si couldn't sleep for 24 hrs

I was all for being immediately discharged and was very anti-hospital wanting a birthing center water birth. Que late baby then waters breaking but no contractions and I had no choice - sad day that was. Finally went into labour at home and nearly gave birth in the car - WTF! Baby came 2 hours after arriving at hospital at 11.44pm and I was knackered. Stay in hospital was 24 hours for me and LO despite there being no problems due to waters breaking (if only I had kept quiet I would have had my water birth :() As I was to be discharged at gone midnight I said there was no point and I would stay. Worked out for me - lovely ward and midwives (and I made a right bloody mess of their floor and bath the next day) and I had a nice chat with the woman across from me who had a c-section and was very upset and struggling to BF. Made me realise how lucky I was and put my concerns into perspective! That being said if you are happy to leave asap and are both healthy - go for it! Personally I could barely move after a few tears and 6 stitches - owie

Kr1 - WTF - I fed DS immediately and he fed every 1-2 hours!

Kr1stina that sounds horrendous!!! Also thought babies should feed soon after birth !!!

I stayed by choice. They asked me if I wanted I go home, and I would have been home four hours after giving birth and asked if I wanted to stay and get help with breastfeeding. I chose to stay, as I was feeling a little overwhelmed with feeding, I'm glad I did as really struggled with the latch, midwives were on hand to help me with different techniques and I felt a little more at ease when I went home the following day, they offered me another night on top of that, but I needed sleep and support from DH :) it didn't mean that breastfeeding was then a walk in the park, but I felt it helped me.

I stayed 24 hours with my first as she needed to be checked after that amount of time due to meconium in the waters.

My second I had at half 11 in the morning and was at home by half 2. It would have been sooner but I was waiting for my mum to bring my dc1 in so we could all go home together! I'd had a shower in that time and probably some lunch and was then waiting!

I was much happier at home!

12 hours afterwards. If you want to go home as them to prepare your discharge notes asap so that you are ready to leave as and when you are ready. They can't keep you in!

Had DS at 9.20pm, straightforward water birth but with stitches. Was told we could be discharged at 3am if we really wanted, or stay in the room until morning then leave or go to the ward if I wanted to stay longer. I opted for leaving in the morning. He'd fed well and I really didn't want to go to the ward.
It was a mixed experience, I think it was better for resting to be at home but we did get descended on by the in-laws. I could have done with better feeding support in the first 2 days but then got a different community midwife who was ace and sorted things, I doubt it would have been better on the ward as they were massively understaffed and the rest of my ante-natal group had miserable experiences there.

londonroo

Baby has already been feeding in recovery and was doing well. I made a fuss and insisted that he be passed to me for feeding and eventually they did but they made a big deal of it. Then they didn't come to take him away again and I was scared I would fall asleep holding him and drop him ( I'd been awake for about 20 hours ).

When I've had instrumental deliveries I was told that the nurses couldn't help me, as they only care for women who have had CS. But when I had a CS they did nothing either. So I have no idea what they do with their time . Fill in forms in the nurses station I guess.

So I couldn't wait to get home .

DS 1 born at 10pm, discharged at 02:30,
DS 2 born at midnight and discharged at 7am,
DS 3 born at 3:30am and discharged at 07:30... so it is possible if all goes very smoothly and the hospital needs the room!
Good luck!

They werent going to let me leave and i was in a state psychologically. At home i had my parents and my DH waiting for me to help me and in hospital there were barely any staff.
I eventually just got myself dressed, put my LO in his car seat and hobbled to the front desk and announced i was leaving in ten mins with or without paperwork being completed.
They were absolute arses about it and tried to frighten me saying SS might visit me at home (absolute bullshit because there was no medical reason for me or my baby to still be in hospital it was just that they hadnt filled in the relevant paperwork for me to leave) if i walked out.
In the end i did just leave and im glad i did. No one from SS came to visit me and i even had to chase up having a health visitor visit me myself because they had forgotten about me!!
At the end of the day its not a prison and if theres no reason for you to be there and you will get better care at home then you should just leave. They make you sign a bit of paper saying you are leaving against medical advice but they cant actually stop you.
I would happily have stayed in hospital if i thought it would have been beneficial to my baby but it really really wasnt.