Due November No 2

[eidsvold]

sorry for being presumptuous enough to start a new thread but I had so much to catch up on and fill you in on...

hiya all - finally settled and have pc at home!! Singapore was wonderful if exhausting. The heat took a lot out of me but it was great to have the break before we headed into the move again. We are in our house and settled - almost unpacked - just books and non essentials left to sort out.

had my first real ante natal appt last week - found a great GP - very approachable and very pro - woman's choice re: everything - amount and type of testing - I had three hospitals to choose from. She then did a proper antenatal consultation and I got to hear the baby's heart beat - great I also have my referral for my scan but have yet to have a date.

Halfway( 20 weeks) today - EDD is 5th November.

Over here the antenatal care is either shared between the GP and the hospital consultant or is all hospital based - there are a couple of midwife led birthing units but very hard to get into - done by ballot system and at this late stage no way I would even get a look in.

Gp was brilliant - took all I had to tell her about last pregnancy in her stride and rather than preaching and assuming what I wanted ( like the GP and midwife in UK) she asked me what I wanted.

Unlike the UK - homebirths are extremely rare - I have decided to have a hospital birth in the major hospital for the state - should anything like last time happen again I am right there rather than having to be transferred or having the baby transferred.

Now I just have to wait for them to get back to me with an anomaly scan date. Hopefully all being well - next week.

Glad to hear all is well with everyone else - baby is moving and heard it swishing around whilst the GP was trying to hear the heartbeat. Definitely in maternity clothes now - got some good jeans from George/ASDA before we left.

Take care....

glad to hear all went well at your scan bunny.

strangely re: names - last time we had a girls name we loved but could not think of or agree on any boys names and I was convinced dd was a girl - which she was/is..... this time we are having a hard time thinking of girls names but have a boys name we love and agree on... so perhaps this one is a boy - have no inkling this time. Scan was not helpful either as babe was not in a position to reveal anything - lucky dh did not want to know.... I did...

strangely - i look really pregnant this time - last time - all through the pregnancy just looked like someone who ate all the pies... dd was quite tiny though.. so perhaps this one is a biggun... only 21 1/2 weeks...lots of movement when I am sitting quietly or laying in bed.

just waiting for my hospital referral/booking appointment to come through the post as well as my class schedule... we did not go to any antenatal classes and did not need to in the end as dd was born 10 days early by emergency caesarean.... so figure I better find out about labour etc. The classes over here are broken into two segments - 2 weeks taken by a physio re: labour and that sort of thing and then the last four are taken by the midwife for the rest, a little labour, feeding, going home etc. For parents who have been through it before there is an evening refresher.. just one night.

The GP thinks all being well I can have a vaginal birth after the caesar but remains to be seen if the same condition that caused the last one reappears in this pregnancy.

Hope everything is okay Twinkie...

Hi, glad everyone's scans are going well so far.
Viv - I knew someone who's 20 week old foetus was discovered to have Edwards. It was really drastic too with no limbs at all. They went to hell and back so I can appreciate how your friend must feel.
I think, from deduction, that Bunny, you and I are in similar situations. I have a higher than is normal risk for Downs for my age. We declined an amnio because we felt as a couple we would deal far better with a child with Downs than with a termination so late on. But now of course, my 20 week scan is hanging over me like a lead balloon, not because of the Downs, but because they might find OTHER things such as hole in the heart or water on the brain or things than might require immediate surgery after birth! Over here, however, the 20 week scan is done at 22 weeks, which due to them not being able to fit me in, will be closer to 23 weeks, so NEXT weekend on Saturday morning aaaggghh.
We have decided not to find out the sex, but, babe willing, I will be having a jolly good look!!

Hi All,

Thanks for thinking of me - we - me DP and baby are fine (as is DD still insisting that she call baby Blue Flower though!!).

We saw everything the scan went on for 75 minutes checking and measuring all the bones and internal organs and they said - whoooho it is definately a boy - DP was pleased at that comment think he thinks it means Max has a huge todger and he reckons takes after him!!

He danced about inside me throwing his arms about when proded and kicking like crazy and it was lovely to see it if even if I did have a dead leg for lying still for so long!!

On the downside I also have really low blood pressure and have been having terrible migranes because of it with all the horrid visual symptoms and numbness - yuck I don;t feel much like glowing at all!!

And to top it off I had my hair cut really short and hate it - DP loves it but I look like a pregnant boy!!

Glad to hear that your bleeding has stopped Bunny - lets just keep our fingers crossed that thats the end of it and you can sit back and relax now. XXX

Arwenevenstar - my sister had to have a terminati8on at 23 weeks last November and I held her hand and helped her through it and have to say it was the worse experience ofmy life so god knows what your friends are going through - I ended up having a bit of a breakdown!! There are a few books you could buy them about grief and healing from Amazon that I got my sister and she felt was helpful - can;t remember the names but I will have a look for you next week when I am back in work.

Well hope the rest of you are ok and I am getting stretch marks too - I can;t believe it didn't until right at the end before!!

arwenevenstar - can appreciate what you are going through - my dd was born with a heart defect that required ( in the end) 2 open heart surgeries at 8 weeks old - probably the worst time of my life... now - earlier this year was given the all clear and just needs check ups every couple of years.. her heart is just like a 'normal one' now.... You would never know to look at her unless I told you and showed you the scar. It was tough from her birth to the recovery from her surgery but it seems like an eternity ago.

This heart defect was detected at the 20 week scan and confirmed via fetal cardiac scans at Kings at around 23 and 28 weeks. We had already decided that dd would be born and we would just deal with whatever came our way....

So if you want to ask anything - as I said before - feel free. If I can't help - might be able to point you in the right direction...

of course you may not need any of this - but hey I am here if that is the case....

I am sure everything will be fine

glad all went well Twinkie....

glad all the scans are ok been to the hospital and it seems i will have to inject insulin to help controll the g/d one good point is in all the chances of needing a c/s are very remote although i will be induced a week or so before my edd i have my scan next week and need to go to the hospital evry month for extra scans and check ups

arwenevenstar, I am sending you lots of sympathy, I know what you are going through. My result (1:44 chromosonal problems) was on my mind 24 hours a day. I had nightmares about losing the baby so even sleep was no escape. I googled away and found out more and more about terrible deformities and conditions which I then became convinced my baby would have. Like you I declined an amnio as we wouldnt opt for a termination and didnt want to risk miscarriage so for us it was a 7 week agonising wait. The few days before my 20 wk scan I thought of nothing else and couldnt sleep the night before it. All I can say is that having had good news I am so very glad we didnt risk this pregnancy by going for an amnio. Yes it was 7 weeks of agony but it was the right decision, to lose a baby would have been more than 7 weeks of agony. I dont know what your risk is but there are plenty of women who have had terrible odds (1:2 ) who have been fine. I found a very good site (hate to recommend another on Mumsnet but it did have lots of womens experiences on) at here . Under Prenatal health, go to prenatal testing and look at the threads. I wont tell you not ot worry because I know you will but please be cheered by my story. I too was convinced of the worse and it want the case at all.

Twinkie, good news now we can both relax.

pp, looking on the bright side, you'll get lots of extra antenatal care. Good luck with it.

Oh boo. Feeling really bad today. I've had my parents staying at the weekend, and then MIL all week and the strain is just too much. I had to go into London today for meetings, and had bad dreams all night last night. So tired and tearful I got on the tube (with a really bloated stomache today, so definate pregnant lady). And not one person gave up their seat for me. After about 5 minutes of being thrown about I thought I was going to puke, then finally, after 30 mins! someone got off and I took that seat. I swear it took me 10 minutes just to recover myself. I felt so sick and tearful and mad at the human race. When I got to the office I checked in the mirror, and there is no way I don't look pregnant today. I know I'm overreacting, but why can't people be a bit more caring and thoughtful.

Oh well, rant over. Just looking forward to the weekend to ourselves. It's a tiring business this pregnancy lark.

arwenevenstar - thinking about you. And Twinkie - yah! Very pleased to hear things are going well with your little Blue Flower/Max

arwenevenstar - my heart goes out to you. When is your scan?

Potpourri, people can be crap cant they? When I was pg with ds I travelled to work on the tube and despite lots of huffing and puffing plus arching my back in a typical pregnant woman stance and rubbing my bump, I didnt get many seats offered to me. But there are some nice people too, they just dont seem to travel by tube.

No-one ever stands up for me either. Was feeling really sorry for myself last night, a patient I have been looking after was dying, as was the patient next door and I still had to stand up on the tube. My back is really painful too, right up at the top where I injured it a few years ago, sitting standing or lying dosen't make it feel any better , so I too was doing the rubbing back thing. Did you find anything that helped with your back last time Bunny?
I have to say though I have been really shocked at the number of pregnant women laft standing, especially on the district/circle lines, I see them pressed up against the window, really obviously pregnant. So I've realised things won't get any better. Although at nine months it might be quite effective to threaten to fall on top of them at every bump and turn...!

Hello everyone.

Samcj, sorry to hear you're having problems with your back. Mine has been aching quite a bit too, and I've already dug out my support belt from last time which actually works wonders I find. It's the Reenie support belt (bottom right), very sexy don't you think? Anyway, if you've had back probs due to an injury I'd mention it to your midwife or GP as they may be able to give you a support of some kind (I just bought mine but one of my friends got hers from her doctor). (if you decide to buy a Reenie one, get a size bigger than you think you need...I bought medium and grew out of it before the end last time, although I did get pretty big).

Does anyone else feel huge already? I'm sure I'm much bigger than I was at this stage with my first, and I got really big with ds. I'm really fretting about it - I'm only little and I felt totally overwhelmed by the extra weight and the size of the bump last time (and I grew out of some of my maternity clothes...grrrr!). Everyone is already commenting about how big I am getting .

Good news about the scan Twinkie. Hope yours goes well arwenevenstar.

Plantpot, shame about the insulin but as bunny says you will be monitored closely. How often do you have to inject?

Thanks Gingernut, that's really helpful, you are very sweet. I'm seeing the midwife after my scan on Thursday so I was going to say to them about it then. I don't think it can be baby weight yet, I have a definate bump but not one that everyone can notice. Also as it's at the top of my back where I did hurt it I think it must just be due to all my ligaments loosening up, will a support still help with that do you know Gingernut?
Poor you for feeling so big! Everyone always seem to say you are bigger with your second than your first don't they? Maybe it will slow down now, did you keep your maternity clothes from last time? Still haven't really found any that don't look ridiculous on me! So I really can't be that big can I? Just had to buy a size or so larger lot. This pregnancy lark is bloody expensive isn't it?!!

oooooo hi everyone!!

I know what you all mean about transport and can I say it seems to be builders who are the only peopke to offer me a seat on the train or bus - men in suits and women are the worst - last time I got offered a seat I actually said to the uy thank you very much thats very kind of you it seems that us pregnant women are invisible these days - very loudly so the rest of the bus heard and I hope at least they felt a little bad!!

I am huge (IMO) too - feel much bigger than I did with DD and everyone is saying so too - especially DPS best friend's wife - you would think I looked 9 months at 21 weeks by the way she speaks! (and have togo to hers for BBQ this afternoon and you can imagine just how much I am looking forward to that!!)

Oh and have found out that DPs mum was induced at 38 weeks case DP was sooo huge - even at 38 weeks he as nearly 9lb which considering DD was just over 6lb scares the shit out of me - why oh why did he not tell me this before I slept with him????

Anyway glad to hear you are all relatively ok.

Much love and hugs TWINKIE XXX

Sam, I don't know if a support belt like mine would help you TBH, that's why I suggested you mention it to your m/w. There are some that look like they give support further up which might be what you need. I got really achey early on last time too, I think a lot of it is the ligaments loosening.

I did keep my clothes from last time but I've bought some more because some of the old ones aren't so useful now I'm not working (clothes that were OK for doing an office job aren't quite so great when grovelling around on the floor playing with a toddler). Also, children have a nasty habit of smearing you with snot and food (amongst other things!) so my clothes seem to be in the wash all the time!

Twinkie, glad I'm not the only huge one. My dh was a 9lb baby too, but his mum probably had undiagnosed gestational diabetes. ds was 7lb8oz so not huge but big for me and his head was quite big. Well, it's got to come out one way or another! I've been offered a c/s this time, not sure what to do really but maybe I'll start another thread about that sometime nearer the time. Hey, have you told your sister yet? How are things on that front? I hope better than you feared.

Oh god yes i completely forgot about it - I told her on the phone on Wednesday - she got all gushing at first and then got cross that other people knew when she didn't and even though I tried to explain that I didnlt want her to know until I knew Max was fine she said 'You donlt have that right to make those decisions and should have told me' - well that said it all really - finished conversation quickly after that and haven't spoken to her since - she didn;t even ring DD to say Happy Birthday so I guess that says it all.

DP said that although I got the reception I thught I would it was not the best result but at least I don;t have to worry about telling her anymore - balls is in her court so to speak!!

Gosh Twinkie, "havent got the right"??? this is your pregnancy and every decision surrounding it is yours. I am sure once she has cooled down she will be delighted for you though.

Sam, have you heard of belly bras? They might give give support to your upper back, I'll find a link for you.

here

or here

Twinkie, it was your decision and yours alone as to when to tell your sister your news. I think she is probably upset and will calm down in time. Shame she took it out on your dd though. BTW, my MIL says that her labour with my dh was far easier than with his elder sister despite the fact his sister was only 7lb something.

Those belly bras look good, but there are also various other types of support (e.g. the one my friend had had lots of straps going some way up her back). That comment about feeling as though your tummy is about to fall to your knees is exactly how I felt last time!

How are you doing bunny? Feeling any more movement yet?

Thanks Bunny they do look good! I'll see what the midwife says on Thursday, if she dosen't come up with any better suggestions (physio etc) then I'll pay for one of those! I'm sure DP will be delighted to see my vision of lovliness in one of those!!!
Glad you've managed to tell your sister Twinkie, it must be a weight of your mind to have told her, even if she has been difficult about it still. I'm sure she will come round, she probably does feel she has missed out some what, but you were acting in what you felt were her best interests. When she understands that she will come round.
Oh, and I beat you all. I weighed 10'6 at birth, my mother had to have an emergency cesarian as my head was too big ! I'm desperatey hoping that this baby follows in their fathers, more normal size, footsteps!!

10'6! OMG.

My thoughts exactly PP!!!

ouch, ds was 9.5 and that was bad enough.

Is everyone feeling lots of movements now? I havent felt much for a couplee of days and I am beginning to worry. Pls tell me yours are all very sporadic too.

Good grief Sam!

bunny, until recently I wasn't feeling movements every day and they're still not very vigorous so I rarely notice them if I'm rushing around.