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Original poster

I have started bleeding!!

461 replies

SparklyGothKat · 01/01/2007 16:56

After the inital shock of finding out I am pregnant again, I have started bleeding today. Phoned the emergancy gp and of course he said that it could be a miscarriage, so he tried to get me an appointment at the EPU but noone is there, so I have to phone my gp tomorrow.. I have a very slight pain on my right hand side, and the bleeding is light. I asked about ectopic pregnancy and he said I would be in serevre pain, which I am not.

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lulumama · 07/01/2007 21:19

agree with wurly..and this might well have helped you crystallise exactly how you and DH feel about having more children.

UCM · 07/01/2007 21:20

xx

Original poster
SparklyGothKat · 07/01/2007 21:20

we wanted this baby, everyone wanted this baby. We now know that we want another baby.. but I want this baby!!

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wurlywurly · 07/01/2007 21:23

as awful as it sounds just put it down to experience, you now are sure that you want another baby then go for it, give your body time to recover and then try again and this time there will be no ifs or buts

lulumama · 07/01/2007 21:23

i'm sorry......truly.......it is desperately sad....i am sorry you lost this baby,,and i wish you only happiness ahead.x

wurlywurly · 07/01/2007 21:24

i know it sounds awful but i have never taken MAP how long between the 'dead' and the MAP kicking in??? IYKWIM

AitchTwoOhOhSeven · 07/01/2007 21:25

i think everyone feels guilty when they lose a baby, SKG. it doesn't have to be for real reasons, you just do.
because you're that baby's mum and all you want to do is make the world safe for them and keep them well.
i'm very sad for you that this pregnancy hasn't worked out, but you go ahead and feel guilty and sad and angry and crazy and all the things that one feels when we lose our already much-loved babies.
These feelings will pass, but you need to go through them i think. i beat myself up about a lot of stuff ('WHY are my tubes shit and no-one else's are?/ maybe i didn't WANT the baby enough etc etc). It's not true, but sometimes when we look for answers and the answer is 'just because', we turn our energy in on ourselves. you'll come out the other side, i promise...

Original poster
SparklyGothKat · 07/01/2007 21:26

not sure what you mean Wurly?? I took the MAP on the 11th, which was bang in the middle of my cycle, but it ov. didn;t stop the pregnancy.

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AitchTwoOhOhSeven · 07/01/2007 21:26

oh god, i remember so wanting those babies SKG, and not some imagined baby in the future... my heart is bleeding for you right now...

AitchTwoOhOhSeven · 07/01/2007 21:28

i think wurly meant to write 'the deed'.

Original poster
SparklyGothKat · 07/01/2007 21:28

this is my second misccariage, the last one happened about the same time, but I didn't know anything was wrong till I was 8 weeks, when I started bleeding. I don;t feel the same sorrow as I did before, does that make me a bad person.

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Cadbury · 07/01/2007 21:28

really sorry to ear this xxxxx

lulumama · 07/01/2007 21:29

aitch..you have said just the right thing, again..

sparkly..nothing you are feeling ( or not feeling ) is wrong

AitchTwoOhOhSeven · 07/01/2007 21:29

no, unfortunately it makes you someone who isn't quite as vulnerable (in a way) as you were then because one bad experience teaches you not to hope. at least that's how it was for me.

Original poster
SparklyGothKat · 07/01/2007 21:29

i took the MAP 8 hours after the deed wurly.

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wurlywurly · 07/01/2007 21:29

sorry that sounded awful when i read it back, what i meant was i thought MAP was supposed to stop you from getting pregnant, after un-protected sex, that it worked almost instantly (or is that me being naive) didnt think it would take this long to work.

wurlywurly · 07/01/2007 21:30

ok thanks, just wondered.

Original poster
SparklyGothKat · 07/01/2007 21:31

i see, I think the last week has made me think that the worse could happen and now it has, I am not shocked IYKWIM

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AitchTwoOhOhSeven · 07/01/2007 21:32

i do see what you mean, completely.

Original poster
SparklyGothKat · 07/01/2007 21:33

wurly, its supposed to stop the egg coming out of the ovary, or stop the sperm getting to the egg or stopping a embro implanting. Sometimes it doesn;t works (as in my case) but it can cause problems if you do fall pregnant

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Original poster
SparklyGothKat · 07/01/2007 21:36

i am not sure if I want the scan tomorrow, i don't think I can go through that again..

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wurlywurly · 07/01/2007 21:37

thanks sgk you have cleared that up for me,

AitchTwoOhOhSeven · 07/01/2007 21:39

i'm afraid you do need to go for the scan. it might be a self-resolving ectopic, and if so your hcg levels will need to continue to be monitored. can you go and get some sleep, sweetheart, you must be exhausted. can you take dh to bed and cry and cry and cry? that's what i used to do...

Original poster
SparklyGothKat · 07/01/2007 21:41

if its a self-resolving ectopic will I need surgery, I'm scared..

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foundintranslation · 07/01/2007 21:43

Sparkly, I've had 3 mcs, the last 2 consecutive, and in terms of the immediate coping in the situation, I was more 'together' (most of the time) each time - there was a horrid kind of 'routine' (for want of a better word) to it the third time in particular. IME you never quite have that shock again that you get on ending up in that horrid place the first time.

Please don't feel guilty. Miscarriage is sickeningly common, it wasn't necessarily the MAP, really it wasn't. With my second mc I initially didn't deal very well with being pg and had just begun to be happy, really, really happy about it when it all went wrong. I blamed myself bitterly and briefly thought of it as a 'punishment', but it wasn't one, and there's no point at all in those kinds of feelings. Reproduction is an amazingly fragile process and nature can be a b*gger.

So sorry again.

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