Active discussions

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

The best shit place to be grads - Early pregnancy after miscarriage - hopes and fears

999 replies

Gr33dyeggs · 04/03/2015 19:27

So heres a thread. Hope you all find it!

Congrats we've made it this far Wine

My worry at 5 weeks is I just feel apathetic and numb. Not excited, not looking forward. Not even fear. Just.... nothing. Constant knicker watch.

Plus wondering whether to push for an early scan and if so when? Losses were 9 and 11 weeks.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Set a reminder
Thread gallery
8
Amyyy27 · 11/03/2015 13:54

Guy i have everything crossed for you! I might make gp appointment for next week or even week after and if i dont have any by then i will cancel and if i do well then they should probably know!

Amyyy27 · 11/03/2015 13:57

Aww thank you chasing! Thats lovely :)

They are awful and i get absolutely no sympathy at work as noone here has suffered from them and they are all arseholes anyway. I am trying to cope with breathing techniques and fresh air when i can. I think its all this tension and unknowing and whatnot. Im hoping 8w scan will help a lot with the fear.

Amyyy27 · 11/03/2015 13:59

Oh!! And im meeting my best mate after work and breaking the news to her about baby. Shes a massive support to me so hopefully she can help too.

chasingtherainbow · 11/03/2015 14:29

Enjoy sharing your news Amyy! I love that little squeee moment when you share such happy exciting news. X

gennibugs · 11/03/2015 15:25

guy you are not a fraud - of course you should be here. It must be so worrying but I think what Amyy wrote sounds sensible so hopefully it is that. Thanks

amyyy sorry re your panic attacks. I would make an appointment and see how you get on til then. Enjoy telling your friend - lovely that you've got a good friend you can share your news with. Smile

gennibugs · 11/03/2015 15:26

chasing well done on your weight loss! I could do with losing a stone to be honest. Trying to eat healthily but I'm struggling a bit as I feel strangely sick. 3 lb is an awesome loss!

happygojo · 11/03/2015 15:36

Hi guys, I check in here every once in a while despite being 18 weeks now (how the hell has THAT happened!), I hope that is ok. Amy have you tried any of the meditation apps? I had a few anxiety attacks after my MC and then a massive one whilst waiting for my 12 weeks scan. Some mindfulness techniques may help? and they have short ones for emergencies like if you feel one coming on at work.

chasingtherainbow · 11/03/2015 15:37

Happy how did you make it through these nerve wrecking weeks? ! How soon after mc did you conceive? X

Amyyy27 · 11/03/2015 15:46

Thanks so much ladies!! Xx

Happy lovely to hear from you and how well you are doing so of course you are welcome! Good tip about the apps thanks i never thought about that. Are there any in particular you would recommend?

happygojo · 11/03/2015 15:52

Hi Chasing I got my BFP on December 6th, which meant I was quite busy during those weeks with Christmas etc, and then in Jan my bf got appendicitis. So I was quite distracted. Because I had a blighted ovum with my MC I still had pregnancy symptoms etc despite there being no baby so in those first 8 weeks I was petrified. But I didn't let myself believe I was preg and was just prepared for the worst the whole time. It is so hard. I went without an 8 week private scan because I would've had to have gone back to where I went to last time and I couldn't face it.

My medical management for my MC was on 13th September 2014, So I fell very quickly, in fact.... first weekend we tried as after the MC I wanted to give myself time and have a period and we also bought a house and moved into it!

I will say that this time it did feel more right, an underlying feeling that I can't explain. With my first preg I had a constant feeling of forboding and was very down. I am not saying that this means anything but I just had a sense that everything was OK (that said, I still had major wobbles and meltdowns) I also feel like I have actually been pregnant forever and can't remember not being pregnant, It is 14 weeks since my BFP and it feels like a lifetime ago....

Sorry for the essay

happygojo · 11/03/2015 15:54

Oh and Amy people rave about 'Headspace' Worth a shot anyway, won't do any harm and might help

MsJupiter · 11/03/2015 16:07

Hi everyone, sounds like I am not the only one having some emotional overload at the moment. I know it is partly hormonal as I remember having the 'pregnancy rage' with DS and I do have that tingly, close-to-tears, heightened feeling all the time. I do feel like maybe my symptoms are stronger in this pregnancy than with the mc but that might be hazy memory or wishful thinking. I am getting crazy upset over things, yesterday I just sobbed and sobbed. I also used to get panic attacks and it does feel like I am having a constant low-level one. Also my tits are bloody killing me

Guy I know it is really hard to keep the faith but with both DS and my mc I had an implantation/breakthrough bleed when my period was due as well as a bleed at around 6 weeks. Obviously one was fine and the other wasn't, the bleeds really weren't indicative of what lay ahead. Actually with DS I had at least 2 more bleeds in the first 12 weeks and he was just fine. But of course we all know it doesn't always end happily so I am not going to tell you not to worry as of course I know you will. I really definitely do know that lots of women bleed during pregnancy and it in no way means the pregnancy isn't viable.

Original poster
Gr33dyeggs · 11/03/2015 16:41

We all belong here guy.

I have no positivity for the pregnancy and all I can think is 'how long should I take off work when it all goes wrong'

OP posts:
chasingtherainbow · 11/03/2015 16:46

Thank you for sharing happy it was reassuring and lovely to read.

I also have a 'feeling' ..In fact. . I had it before the cycle even started. I just felt like I knew. I had some doubts when I thought we'd mistimed dtd but as soon as we'd done it on cd15 I was certain we'd done it. I had moments of absolute certainty during the 2ww and then I'd be overwhelmed with doubt.. but I think I was worried about how I'd cope with a bfn and setting myself up for failure. But I felt just as certain when I tried for dd. That feeling of just knowing that 2nd line will appear before you even pee on it. My mc pregnancy was a huge shock. I hadn't even thought I'd ovulated yet my cycles where so long. I couldn't get my head around it and I felt v detached from it.

I felt low level nausea with mc. But my symptoms this time is so different. .. when I take my bra off my boobs are so painful especially the left. Nipples are tender. . Bowels still Hmm 'affected' and my sense of smell is nuts- I never ever had this before. I always thought super sense of smell would be an awesome superhero power. Now I realise it's fucking annoying. . . The smell of yogurt from the closed bin in another room made me heave just a moment ago.

And im feeling so much down there.

Amyyy27 · 11/03/2015 17:33

Thanks happy!

Well still not a lot going on here symptom wise. Every now and then i feel something down there. And just exhaustion really. Oh and for about 5 mins earlier my right boob felt a bit sore!

greedy sorry you are feeling that way! Im not feeling great either i just feel doomed.

fififolle · 11/03/2015 22:08

Guy you are not a fraud. It is natural to be anxious, that why we're all here, on this thread, to offer each other support, advice and reassurance. Spotting is v common just after BFP. I had a (light) period when early pg with DS and only tested when I was just over 5 weeks.

Original poster
Gr33dyeggs · 12/03/2015 09:25

amyyy how did meeting your friend go? Did you share your news?

I still can't shake a feeling of foreboding. If not another mc, I'm also worried about abnormalities in a baby. I've been googling harmony and nifty tests. Is anyone else considering these?

Nice to hear how you're getting on happy

chasing my bowels are misbehaving too. I've nausea too but same as with mc.

Booking in tomorrow and might see if she would refer for an early scan for peace of mind.

OP posts:
gingerbreadmam · 12/03/2015 09:43

gr33dy ive seen a lot of people on here have had harmony tests i was reading about them on a thread the other day, might be the other pregnant after mc thread if you have a nosey on there.

think its worth asking about a scan if it will put ur mind at rest im sure u have nothing to worry about tho Thanks

Amyyy27 · 12/03/2015 09:44

It went great thanks greedy but I had to leave early as I was just so tired. She knows me so well and knew I was trying not to talk about the baby much in case of jinxing things, so has assured me if there's only one person I want to offload onto then she is there, so that was lovely.

Oh and exactly the same here! I don't feel pregnant at all. I am tired today... that's it.. that could be down to anything :( I am so tempted to buy more tests and 'line check' but promised myself I wouldn't. We decided not to test for Downs as we wouldn't terminate. I haven't thought further than that just yet. We do have the testing booklet at home but feels too early atm to look at especially when I have a really bad feeling.

chasingtherainbow · 12/03/2015 09:52

I'm a complete mess today. I've just pulled up at the mall to buy maternity linen (next have my holy grail of navy linens and I know if I don't buy now They'll be gone and ill suffer all through summer) but I'm struggling to get out of the car. I spent the night tossing and turning after googling pregnancy after ectopic last night and am now terrified. Sigh.

gennibugs · 12/03/2015 10:20

Morning all

amyy glad you had a nice night with your friend Smile She sounds like a good friend.

chasing Google has a lot to answer for! Deep breaths, today you are pregnant. Have you got in touch with your doctor or mw? would an early scan reassure you a bit?

AFM I've been cramping all night and this morning so not feeling hopeful and a bit down today. Cramping was how my mc started last time so they terrify me even though everyone says they are normal. Keeping going to the toilet expecting to see that telltale smear of blood. This is so hard, I feel like the joy of this is being sucked out by all my worry! Sad

Amyyy27 · 12/03/2015 10:28

genni same here :( constant knicker watch. I had cramping to start with and now nothing. Its really worrying me. Definitely no joy at the moment just constant worry!

gennibugs · 12/03/2015 10:36

It's horrible isn't it. I just can't relax!

GuybrushThreepwoodMP · 12/03/2015 10:43

Sorry you're all struggling but glad it's not just me.

chasingtherainbow · 12/03/2015 10:46

I just bought a baby gro Blush