calling all mature mums - pregnant at 43

[cora]

Hi - have 2 kids already 9 and 4 and am pregnant with a third at 43. All is ok so far but feel so aprehensive about being a new mum again at my age - if there are any older new mums about my age out there who can share their experiences with me - I would be so grateful.

Yes, this will be the last one, I think. I'm 42 now and I'll have a teenager and are terrible twos at the same time, so I think that's enough on my plate.

We would have to move house and I have just been made redundant, so I think it's wise to make this baby or last one.

BTW, I have been looking for info re sciatic pain which is bothering me and could not find a current or archived thread. I am hobbling a lot and would like to find out if there's anything that I can do and also if it is sciatic pain or not. The pain is quite sharp and at the top of my bum; gets worse when walking or bending or trying to get up. Any ideas?

Bienchen - i have sciatica too, in my right bum cheek. I find it really helps to keep my feet warm and not let them get wet during the day. Also to keep my hips warm at night (i.e. don't let the duvet slip off so the hip is exposed). A massage can also help, but I find the keeping warm bit the most crucial.

Peacemaker - that's very unlucky to have problems three times round. Makes me feel a complete wimp to go on about a bit of sciatic pain which is really nothing in comparison.

All the best and is there any chance the DVt will improve or is it not likely given that you'll probably put on some extra weight?

Hark, thanks for the tips. I like to keep myself cosy (being foreign and not cut out for damp English weather!!) and I cannot stand cold feet.

I suggest the massage to DP, it will at least take my mind of it for a bit

Hi Bienchen. The hospital says that the clot will take approx. 6 months to breakdown and I'm to be on the twice daily injections until 6 weeks post birth. They will then start giving me blood tests to find out if I have an underlying cause for the clot or whether its the pregnancy, my age and bad luck

peacemaker- you poor thing, that sounds terrible. Once its gone, can you stop the medication?

Peacemaker, that sounds hard...I had bp issues after delivery last time, and know how health problems that carry on for some time post-birth seem more depressing than the kind that go away the minute baby is out. Are you injecting heparin, or warfarin? Hope it resolves fast for you, and turns out to just be a pg thing.

Bienchen, I have a bit of sciatica and sacrum pain these past few days, and agree with the keeping warm. And rest, if you can. Sometimes, with sciatica, stretches can help - but be careful, they can also inflame things and make it worse: only way to tell is to try very gently and listen to your body! I had it badly with dd1, and found slightly arching my back and swaying backwards actually helped - which is the opposite of what most people say
The other thing I've heard suggested (didn't help me much) is alternate heat and cold: bag of frozen peas followed by heat pad, then back to peas etc.
Failing all else, I take paracetamol and put my feet up

Steggers, you are a day ahead of me with the section! Mine is on the 24th. Yes, its truly horrible - hope the bicarb helps a bit.

Have you been checked for cholestasis, just in case? I have, and my test results were fine - but last night my hands and feet itched, which worried me a bit. Back to OB tomorrow...

peacemaker, so sorry to hear about this. I had to do B12 injections for a while when pg with ds and I have to say I didn't care for it much at all. I had to get dh to do them for me as never seemed to master doing it on myself

Definitely last baby for us, too. Dh has had a lot of issues with having the second one and there's absolutely no way he would agree to a third. don't really think it would be good for me either, actually, although I have always wanted to adopt a little girl from China...

I'm only 13 weeks pregnant now and I HAVE to carry on the injections until 6 weeks post birth to avoid any new clots happening, regardless of what this clot is doing.

The drug I'm on is called Clexane and its a low molecular weight heparin that doesn't cross the placenta.

Has anyone else been given a high risk number from their nuchal scan as I have? I can't wait for the next scan in January which will hopefully give us more information.

Peacemaker, I was on Clexane for 12 weeks both pregncies, to try and avoid miscarriage (history of lots of them before). Your poor tummy must be black and blue, I know mine was - especially when I forgot and put car seatbelt too tight. Used to wonder if the women in the pool changing room thought dh was beating me up

Did you have high numbers as in, high jsut because of age risk? Or high because of measurements?

Hi Elibean, I think it was both, my age, and the fold number was 2.6
The clexane does hurt doesn't it. I normally inject myself in the morning and DH does it in the morning for me. Have some bruising but not too bad.

Hmm, I thought under 3mm was ok? Its horrid waiting for that second scan, isn't it...I didn't relax with either of my pgs until I felt they could have a really good look at my babies. Did you have the bloods done too, or just the scan?

Thats what I thought too Elibean. I've heard the bloodtest isn't very accurate so we're just leaving it at the scan at the moment. We are both strong people able to cope with whatever we are given so we won't persue any further tests. This is my first baby with DH and is a very wanted and loved baby.

Thats what I thought too Elibean. I've heard the bloodtest isn't very accurate so we're just leaving it at the scan at the moment. We are both strong people able to cope with whatever we are given so we won't persue any further tests. This is my first baby with DH and is a very wanted and loved baby.

Thats what I thought too Elibean. I've heard the bloodtest isn't very accurate so we're just leaving it at the scan at the moment. We are both strong people able to cope with whatever we are given so we won't persue any further tests. This is my first baby with DH and is a very wanted and loved baby.

eeek, sorry, thought it hadn't sent my message

peacemaker - that's OK - MN has been up the creek this afternoon, so its probably the web, not you!

What was your nuchal risk ratio? Mine was 1:50 (then 1:167 after scan) at Queen Charlottes. At the Fetal Medicine Centre it was 1:29 (1:595 after scan). I had bllod tests at FMC but nothing invasive after that.

I thought anything under 3mm was OK as well???

Hi harktheheraldfoxessing, It was at Queen Charlottes that I had mine It was all a bit confusing really because the first technician who did the scan said the nuchal measurement was 1.6, then the baby wouldn't get into a good position and their was a generator test and the machine went off, then another tech came in and was helping the first woman put the machine on again and then she measured it and said it was 2.6. They didn't even try to look to see the nasal bone which I thought was quite an important thing to look for and unfortunately I didn't think about it until I got home. I'm just not getting worked up about it until the next scan which apparently they now do at 21 weeks and not 20 weeks though I'm supposed to be having a monthly scan from 20 weeks onwards.
Are you being seen by FMC regularly too? The 2nd floor one? I see them aswell but there was no mention about blood tests. I have had loads of bloods done recently but nothing relating to testing for Downs Syndrome. The tech after giving us the results asked if we wanted genetic counselling but we refused.

peacemaker - They offered me genetic counselling too but I refused it as well. Also my scan all went wrong too and lasted 45 minutes

I only went to the FMC for the nuchal/bloods thing at 13 weeks, unfortunately I can't afford to go back. (the Proff Nicholaides one in Harley St, not the similarly named CFM at QC that is).

Did they give you a ratio i.e. 1: ???

ps. are you in west London too? There are a couple of west Londoners on here so far (thus proving the stats. about the average age of Mums in certain boroughs being higher than the average )

harktheheraldfoxessing, yes, they gave us the figure 1:21 which isn't brilliant. I have to attend the FMC because I have a DVT and am having to inject myself twice a day so they are keeping a close eye on me. My scan took ages too but because the baby kept standing on its head and just wouldn't play ball. She had real problems getting any kind of measurements.

Yes, I live in West London - Bedfont

Bedfont - why the sad face?

I work for a housing trust and we have properties in Bedfont

I don't think your nuchal measurement was that high at 2.6mm, but the risk factor has been heavily skewed by your age though hasn't it? The trouble is, when you get to our age its virtually impossible to come up with a good nuchal result as they base the risk on age.

Poor you with the DVT

harktheheraldfoxessing, Yes, she did say my age had alot to do with it but I've seen plenty of posts from women older than me who haven't been given such a high risk factor. I wish I'd had the presence of mind to ask about the nasal bone but I truly was shocked at the figures. The sad face is because I'm not very keen on Bedfont/Feltham and am not very happy living here. Can you believe that at my age I'm living with my MIL. I've gone from living with my parents, to renting, to buying 3 houses, back to renting after splitting with my husband and now, re-married and living with MIL Totally wrong way round to do it but we're saving like mad to buy our own place.

ps. peacemaker - having a lively baby in the womb is supposed to be a good indicator for health too. My brother has Downs and my Mum said he hardly ever kicked or moved. Also, when we had our scan at the FMC, the sonographer said Downs babies tend not to move very much.

Do you think you'll find out the sex?

I'm 23+2 (boy )