Who visited you in hospital after birth?

[Stillyummy]

I am pregnant with my first baby and was wondering how soon after the birth did you feel like receiving visitors and who visited you in hospital? This thread is the result of an over enthusiastic mother in law who needs her expectations managed.

Ended up with a full spinal and hip to hip section as ds was back to back breech I did not come up from recovery for 3 hours.

My interfering mil arrived at the hospital and popped into the parent craft room which is for new fathers only awaiting their partners to come back and demanded a cuddle! Luckily i only found out about this weeks after ds arrived or i might have had a melt down!!!

I didnt have use of my arms properly in delivery suit due to the high spinal and although they placed ds on my arms (which were on plates) i could not really feel it and i was really po that i wasnt the first person to hold him when he came into the world (apart from DP and hospital staff!). Next time she will be warned to stay away very politely........

Whatever you are or are not happy with my advice would be to clearly state this before the birth!

I definitely was not upto visitors didnt want to see anyone apart from dp for my time in hospital trying to feed when couldnt even get to sit up without help so you might be advised to wait and see how your delivery is before telling people what you are happy with.

No hospital visitors (or birth partner). Left the hospital within 24 hours and was sleeping much of that time, so not much point in anyone visiting.

First visitor was out neighbour who was working next door to the hospital. A bit later mil popped in briefly. Left the hospital the same day so no time for visitors really.

PILs drove down on the day to visit but only stayed an hour at most. DD slept the entire time they were there so MIL didn't get a cuddle which I think she was a bit cheesed off at.

My mum came down the same day and came back the next day too and was brilliant. She had the honour of being the first person DD threw up on!

SIL also came in very briefly with eldest nephew - not strictly allowed but she knew people who worked at the hospital and sneaked in. It was lovely to see them for 10 minutes but not sure I could have coped with any longer than that!

My parents saw DD again the following weekend, when she was about 5 days old, and PILs visited again the following week.

Don't forget lots of people go home same day or next day

I had homebirths for both my dc and I couldn't wait for friends and family to come and see us! Although, my best friend did have to block my neighbour on the grounds that the father should probably meet his son first... (dh missed the birth of dc1 - oops). Having said that though, it was too much having my inlaws stay with us for a whole weekend when ds was 10 days old and I was struggling with bf. My family booked a hotel and brought meals, did laundry, housework etc... but it was easier with them because I can tell my own family to bugger off.

I had everyone I could at the hospital! Mum, sister and bro/in-law, bro&sis in law x2, friend. Had son early in morning so they all came in in the afternoon visiting time. I was very happy to show off my wonderful baby

Had a horrible labour and eventual C section so was in after for 3 nights.

On the second night I had about 7 of my family come and visit. Was brilliant! Mum, Dad, brother, sisters and SIL.

Only trouble was my scar hurting when they were making me laugh.

I had dd's father and my dad. They visited for about an hour and left. That was it. A friend did stop by but was told she couldn't come in with her toddler. I felt very alone and could really have done with a bit of company.

I was quite anxious at the though of loads of visitors piling in so we made clear that we were not sure whether we would want them and we would call and invite people to ensure there was only a few at a time (both have big families) Dd was born by emcs on Sunday evening. My mum and GPs came for afternoon visit the next day anD PIL that evening. Followed by a couple of people each visiting time until I left.

What I would say was that I was excited to show her off, but much calmer knowing that I was in control of who would visit and that there would be no surprises. So prepare people not to visit until invited. It helped that the hospital only allowed two or three visitors per bed.

1st baby - husband, my parents, PIL and BIL & SIL. I was really quite unwell and my husband and parents were fine because they didn't need any entertaining - cooed over the baby while I slept. In laws were hard work as per bloody usual.

2nd baby - husband, daughter and my parents. PIL were unwell but when they visited a week later the first thing that MIL said was "maybe you'll have a boy next time". She's lucky I bit my tongue. Fortunately her disappointment at having another granddaughter means she's seen her twice in 3 weeks - every cloud!

I had a fairly easy first birth and my parents were there (very much invited) as soon as they could arrive. We were actually still in the birthing room because visiting was about to end and I wanted them to meet her before the next day.

The next day my sister, aunt and uncle and cousins arrived but unfortunately no one got to meet her because they thought she might have a infection so she was whisked off to NICU.

Ultimately we were in for 5 days and my whole close family saw her. DP's family didn't arrive until after we'd got out because they live some distance away and it would have been silly for them to come up just for an hour or so a day.

I was fine with that level of visitors tbh. But then I'd had a pretty easy time of it and was quite happy to leave her for cuddles with other people while I got up and made some tea and got some 'me' headspace

Too many bloody people.

I'd had an EMCS with DC2. I had only just got up to have a shower, I'd lost a lot of blood, and my absorbant sheet that went underneath my bottom was having to eb changed all the time and weighed so that they knew how much lochia I was losing. Less than 24 hours later, who turns up, all at the same time, but

DH
DC1
DMIL
DFIL
DSIL1
DSIL1's boyfriend
DSIL2
DSIL2's boyfriend

It was way too much. They didn't even have the excuse of bringing DC1 with them, as my parents had brought DC1, and they were waiting paitently downstairs in the cafe.

I can forgive DSILs as they had never been in my position and were perhaps naive. I cannot understand for the life of my why DMIL thought this was a good idea to encourage them all to come, at the same time, with their boyfriends, having had 3 DC herself.

God I don't know how any of you coped with all those visitors!!

I just had DH and my best friend. My MIL came for a day after we were home and my mum stayed for a week after DH went back to work after paternity leave!

DC1 was in two days. first day after DS was born previous evening we had brief visits from both sets of grandparents. second day both sisters in law (just them, not all their kids) while waiting to be discharged.

DC2 went home within six hours and had too many bloody visitors descend on my house the first day.

DD was born at 8.15 at night (EMCS under GA) my mum, 2dsis's, FIL, my dad and grandparents came and saw me the next morning in the HDU. I couldn't move or talk and was happy baby was getting attention of someone!
Over the next 5 days in hospital I had all the same people again, as well as my step mother, step father, 2 friends and there dp's. I don't understand the 'not letting people come' thing, I had a terrible time, slept trough atleast 3 visits and was happy for the presents (mainly champagne) and for people to come and hold my beautiful baby that I couldn't hold! My mum actually held my DD 2 hours before id ever seen her!

DM and Dsis's actually arrived while I was having a blood transfusion and I think Dsis put makeup on me while I had it in my arm.. It was quite nice !

Thank you postchildrenpregranny
( loving your name) would have suited me until recently but just became a granny !

My parents and brothers only - about 12 hours after DS1 was born, and the next day when DS2 was born. MIL lives 12 hours away. Though by coincidence (yes really, baby was early) she had flights booked for the day after I had DS2 so she came with DH to pick me up from hospital. They were outside visiting hours though so weren't allowed in!

Beware if your baby doesn't take to breastfeeding initially, you may be pumping for the first couple of days. I had this with my first and it made it awkward with visitors.
Also there's barely any space around those beds!

DS born Sunday evening. Monday afternoon visiting our priest (close friend), and another friend who worked in the hospital. Neither stayed more than 5 minutes.
Tuesday, another friend and my cousin who was so freaked out by the whole thing it was hilarious.

Grandparents live few hundred miles away and all work so it was the Friday before the first visit from them.

I feel a bit sorry for MILs. I only have sons. When they grow up and have children, I'll be aching to see the baby. (If they choose a nice wife, I'll probably want to see her too!). Maybe though, she won't want his side anywhere near.

When i had my DC, i was in intensive care for 24 hours and not up to seeing anyone. I remember showing DS1 off though the following day and being really excited to introduce everyone to, what i thought, was the most beautiful baby ever. It really wasn't about me at all. Some friends felt differently though when they had their first child - i think it all depends on you.

DC1 born 1pm. DH was with me. My parents came to the hospital that evening (about 6pm ) while I was still on labour ward. I invited them and was very happy to see them. They left about 8pm I think. DH thrown out of postnatal ward at 10pm. Next day DH came - his DM had arrived at my parents' house that evening and she wanted to come to the hospital but visiting hours were not until the afternoon so she wasn't allowed. We were discharged at 1pm (24 hours after birth.

DC2 born at home - my parents came same day.