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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Who visited you in hospital after birth?

149 replies

Stillyummy · 26/01/2015 21:30

I am pregnant with my first baby and was wondering how soon after the birth did you feel like receiving visitors and who visited you in hospital? This thread is the result of an over enthusiastic mother in law who needs her expectations managed.

OP posts:

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Sunbeam18 · 26/01/2015 22:36

Next day I had MIL, my mum, dad, sis and brother in law. Day after, close friend. Happy to celebrate with all of them.

Bluestocking · 26/01/2015 22:38

My mother, one of my sisters and her daughter visited me an hour or so after DS was born. I was utterly exhausted but thrilled to be able to introduce my lovely new baby to them. My other sister visited the following day and that was great too. We took DS home the day after that.

HumphreyCobbler · 26/01/2015 22:42

I had lots of visitors in hospital all three times. I liked it the first two times but the last time I really could have done without it. I really wasn't emotionally up to having visitors.

SantanaLopez · 26/01/2015 22:42

Oh get it out of the way, that's what I did. I felt pretty good though, the hormonal crash came afterwards. If I had waited they'd still be waiting

GreenShadow · 26/01/2015 22:45

Under normal circumstances, I don't think it should be a problem having visitors fairly soon after the birth. Just make sure that they are made aware that visits should be short.

LinzAJ · 27/01/2015 06:31

I too have a very enthusiastic MIL who is so excited to have a grandchild on the way, its her first so she is literally bouncing with excitement!

Husband and I have agreed we will not be telling anyone that baby has arrived until we have had some time to get over the fact we have just had a baby else his parents will be there within 15 mins of the call. We all live quite close to the hospital.

We have also agreed that we will limit the time people stay when we get home so we don't have to entertain people for too long. I am really not that comfortable with having loads of people around as I get the feeling all I will want to do is stare at my baby! I guess we won't know how we really feel about it all until baby arrives.

Good Luck

blacktreaclecat · 27/01/2015 06:37

DS born at 6.25am by CS. No labour though.
My mum came in the afternoon (my dad was away on business). MIL came early evening. My dad came the following day and the day after that we went home.
None of them stayed long and all brought little presents, balloons etc. It was lovely to have a bit of a fuss made that our precious baby was here safe at last.

Degustibusnonestdisputandem · 27/01/2015 06:40

I didn't mind family coming in to visit only an hour or two after my c section, but I was a bit embarrassed I was throwing up as they came in!

bigbluestars · 27/01/2015 06:40

No-one. I was in for 6 hours after my first birth, home 3 hours after my second. No time to have any visitors.

Hakluyt · 27/01/2015 06:46

"
"Husband and I have agreed we will not be telling anyone that baby has arrived until we have had some time to get over the fact we have just had a baby"

This is the sort of comment that gets jumped on form a great height on Mumsnet- but don't leave it too long, will you? Imagine yourself in a similar position, an excited grandma waiting for news - "Hello, the baby's here- it's a girl!" "How wonderful- how are you all?""Oh, fine- very excited""Tell me all about it- when was she born?" "7am the day before yesterday".......
No I know everyone's going to say that's fine- grandparents just have to deal with it- but it's really not fine...........

Turquoiseblue · 27/01/2015 07:04

My sister brother, parents, aunt. All only stayed short periods - useless in terms of helping but wonderful to share the news. PIL visited that weekend when we were home- I made lunch and entertained them- never forget it, I needed to feed/ sleep and was in agony with stitches - would have been better if they visited in hospital! On second baby they visited the same about week later. This time we had take away and dh catered, I was
Less keen to show the world I was superwoman

SomebodysRealName · 27/01/2015 07:06

My DM and DF, DSIS and DMIL all came to the hospital and visited in the delivery room a few hours after the birth. I was very happy to see all of them and insisted MIL took a taxi to get there at our expense. It was lovely - but I had had a largely positive birth experience and went home with them all a couple of hours later.

meandjulio · 27/01/2015 07:07

DS born at 11.15pm - day afterwards I had PILS, my mum and obviously dh. All fine. TBH I was slightly surprised there wasn't a full parade and brass band visiting with a presentation from the Lady Mayoress in gold chain.

Winterskies · 27/01/2015 07:11

I had my first at 8.00pm. dH rang the famiies immediately and they all shot up to the hospital straightaway! The midwife was very relaxed about it and let both sets of parents and BIL into the delivery room whilst I ate my toast. It was lovely.

LinzAJ · 27/01/2015 07:12

Hakluyt - when we said we wouldn't tell anyone we mean maybe the afternoon if baby arrived in the morning or after a few hours. We wouldn't leave it days that's not fair on anyone!

My parents both live at least 4 hours away so I have no pressure from them but Husbands overbearing parents are only just up the road and are both retired so can be at the hospital within minutes so we are trying to take that into consideration before we announce baby's arrival.

We are not that close and I certainly wouldn't want to be trying to feed baby or get myself sorted with them around.

BeeInYourBonnet · 27/01/2015 07:18

DM and DF with DC1. ILs, DPs and friends for DC2 - and I was only in for a short while!. I realised after DC1 how annoying it is to have people come to your house after you've come home from hospital. Coming at annoying inconvenient times, expecting to be waited on etc. MUCH better to get it over and done with when you are waiting round in hospital. I would recommend it to anyone!

lightgreenglass · 27/01/2015 07:20

My DDad, DSIS x2, BIL, DB all saw me 30 mins after I gave birth at 4 in the morning for 5 mins. Then we had regular visitors for the 5 days we were in hospital - I was happy to see people, but then again I am happy to tell them to go away or let me sleep. They weren't interested in me, only DS - first grandchild. I think this time round they'll probably wait, suspect the novelty has worn off.

eurochick · 27/01/2015 07:22

I had a section at 9pm on the Thursday night. My parents came on the Friday and my husband took them to see the baby in NICU. His brother also came and saw me and the baby. My best friend popped in briefly between meetings and just saw me. My parents came again the next day to pick me up and take me home.

HearTheThunderRoar · 27/01/2015 07:29

I gave birth by emcs after a long labour and no one as I gave birth 150 miles away from where we lived (long story!) and where my parents lived, my brothers lived another 200 miles from where I gave birth (or lived), and PIL lived 2 hours flight away. Though we got plenty of visitors when we got home (150 miles away!)

WipsGlitter · 27/01/2015 07:34

Ds1: my mum, sister and her husband, BiL, my friend, FiL and two friends of DP (could have done without them tbh).

Ds2: my mum, sister and her husband, BiL, SIL, FiL, my friend.

Not all at the same time. Second time I was in a private room and visitors could come and go outside of visiting hours. Also DS was diagnosed with DS at birth so the hospital were more relaxed

Eminybob · 27/01/2015 07:35

My baby was born at lunch time and mil, bil and sil came to visit in the evening.

I wouldn't have thought I would have wanted them so soon but actually I was desperate to show DS off!

My mum lives a plane journey away so came to stay for a week when DS was 2 weeks old and DP had gone back to work.

TookALittleLongWayRound · 27/01/2015 07:38

My mum was by birthing partner along with my the husband, my Dad and brother came as soon as they heard DD had been born to see us in the corridor before going into the ward (was 11pm at night). MIL and FIL came the next morning and then my Mum that evening.

The following day MIL came again in the morning briefly and my Mum collected is at 4pm and took us home. I loved having them there.

ChickenMe · 27/01/2015 08:00

Another first timer here with a very enthusiastic MIL who initially declared she was going to be in the delivery room...
We have kept it a bit vague because you just don't know how you're going to feel. We do know that we want to savour the first few hours just the three of us. I think that is reasonable. ILs are nearby so have been told we will let you know and to wait for the call. All I want is for OH and I's choices to be heeded. Obv the GPs on both sides will be the first to know and visit.
MIL wanted to wait outside from the get go but I said no because I find that too stressful she could've been there for days lol

MrsDumbledore · 27/01/2015 08:08

Was on hospital about 36 hours with dd and had my mum, dad, sister snd bil visit. No one from dh 's side, because they weren't as local -would have had them if had been in hospital longer. Pil and sil and her partner did come round the day we came home from hospital though.
I really wanted to see people quickly and show her off to be honest - was never one for wanting to cocoon myself away with the baby and discourage visitors. Also, I think I was on a high the first couple of days -it was day 3 the hormones and tiredness hit, so good to get first visits out of the way quickly. My mil has since commented how amazed she was by how well I coped with having them visit so soon, and I laughed and said that's because she didn't see me sitting at the dinner table sobbing for no reason when my family came round the next day!
I agree with some posters saying in a way visitors at hospital better than visitors at home -time limited by visiting hours, no need to be the host. As long as they are close enough that you can ask them to go for a walk for a bit if you need privacy eg trying to get the hang of bf. In fact, may be better to get 'first visits' out of the way in hospital, so that you then don't need to feel too bad if you don't feel like visitors at home, as important people will already have met the baby.

LovesBooks · 27/01/2015 08:08

My mum was with me during labour and then my nan and sister visited and I did not really get a choice with them. I was in a bit of a mess after labour and luckily they only were there for 20 mins or so. Everyone else visited at home about 2 weeks later.

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