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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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The Berry-Copter!!! (Early 2015 edition)

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FeatherFeather11 · 27/12/2014 11:31

Here we go! Here's to a big Berrie clusterdiff from the other thread and many a safe and healthy baby Berrie arrival in 2015!

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greatbigbushybeard · 30/12/2014 00:25

Wazinga fingers!! That's got to cheer you up lentil!!! Xmas Grin. Perhaps try to get more sleep and naps if you can to help you feel better. We went for a walk in the sunny crisp weather and that helped me feel fresher. I found the before getting pg bit the mentally exhausting bit,not now, as if I'm honest, I was in a very bad place for a while, so now it feels like a bit of a relief & that a weight has been lifted from my shoulders.

Must be hard being diabetic & pg otters. My mum is diabetic and follows a very healthy diet and is very trim but she found Christmas Day difficult as they had lots of gaps between their courses. She has a carb app on her tablet which she finds useful. FairPlay to you adhering to low carb, no sugar etc, it'll all be worth it. Also know what you mean about getting past milestones re mmcs. Mine will be the 12 week one. Was chatting to a friend last night who found out she had lost one at her 12 wk scan so when she was pg with 2nd she was crying on the bed before they even started the scan. It was good news but they told her it was twins & one had died. She said it was half sadness and half relief.

nolly3 · 30/12/2014 08:38

Grin Rp!

lentil I'm not sure we've met, hallo. how far along are you? do you think it's hormones or something else?

nolly3 · 30/12/2014 08:40

btw bushy it's so good to see you here being so positive. I stayed away from the copter so am really pleased all well thus far

thelentil · 30/12/2014 09:49

Hi Nolly, I'm 10 weeks, had two MCs over the last 3 years, clomid, lap followed by infection, then started IUI which was abandoned due to overstimulation. In between MCs I had a couple of bereavements, could be hormones, feel like I'm grieving this one before I've even lost it. Not telling anyone about it until 13 weeks so I don't have anyone to talk it over with

Big falling out with OH this morning, he reckons I'm being lazy

winohhh · 30/12/2014 09:51

Otters, I have gestational diabetes, so also had a low carb/ sugar, no choc Xmas. It was harder than I thought it would be! Really hard to keep things under control when other people are organising the food and don't understand what you can and can't eat!

Lentil, I really struggled in the first few months, emotionally. I'd had a mmc previously, and just couldn't stop thinking about it happening again. I can't offer any advice I'm afraid, I didn't handle it very well! But I hope it passes.

In happier news, I've finished work now!!! Maternity leave! How did that happen!

thelentil · 30/12/2014 10:38

Thank you, it's good to share, like I say I've told no one about the pregnancy so it's nice just to feel less alone. I'm hoping it'll pass when I get past the 12 week stage and the scan is ok

RevoltingPeasant · 30/12/2014 10:39

feel like I'm grieving this one before I've even lost it. Not telling anyone about it until 13 weeks so I don't have anyone to talk it over with. Big falling out with OH this morning, he reckons I'm being lazy

Lentil that worried me a bit. Sounds to me like you've been under huge huge amounts of pressure, maybe even more than many of us, what with the bereavements as well as the ttc, and you need to find a more positive mental space.

I don't really know what to suggest but you know antenatal depression is a thing, right? Maybe ask to speak to a MW earlier than you normally would as with your history you feel emotionally vulnerable. They might be able to refer you to counselling and/or a psychologist. My MW offered to do this because I have serious fears around some aspects of giving birth.

Also I think your OH probably doesn't really think your lazy- he's probably struggling himself and expressing it in an unhelpful way. But that's not good for you, either. Can you talk to him about why you are feeling like this?

Also maybe it would be a good idea to confide in one RL friend. Then you have someone on your doorstep to talk to if you need?

RevoltingPeasant · 30/12/2014 10:41

*you're

nolly3 · 30/12/2014 10:43

RP gives good advice, lentil. Maybe also contact your GP to say how you're feeling - they can be really good when dealing with anxiety, low mood etc. I have been myself recently about infertiliy/work-related issues. Felt pretty stupid going like it was a waste of rNHS resources, but like he said, that is actually what they are there for.

thelentil · 30/12/2014 12:22

Booking appt is Friday, so I'll talk about it then. Mum wants to come with me like with the last ones but there's no way I'll be able to talk with her there, I'll just tell her she can't go

FC offered counselling, I went to one session but couldn't get regular time off. I'll ask if that's still available if I'm no longer a patient

Original poster
FeatherFeather11 · 30/12/2014 15:40

Good advice from the others, lentil - and might be an idea to let your mum know that you'd like to go on your own this time so you can talk to your doc. A mate of mine who had ttc struggles, many miscarriages and an mmc got pregnant on her 2nd round of ivf and suffered from terrible anxiety. She was referred by her gp to a specialist therapist and she's worked through her issues. Now at 18 weeks, she's a lot more happy and positive. Be kind to yourself and as always, we're here to hand hold.

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thelentil · 30/12/2014 20:02

Thank RP and Feather for the hand holding, I have a plan, I'm going to ask the midwife on Friday and not get fobbed off, I've told Mum she's not coming and I'm determined to stop this getting any worse or drag on any longer than it needs to

RevoltingPeasant · 31/12/2014 11:20

Good! You need to be comfortable mentally during your pregnancy. It is different, but I have massive anxieties around gynae procedures and hospitals and male docs, which is potentially an issue for obvious reasons! I found just talking to my MW was hugely helpful, as I was reassured that she knew how I felt and would give me advice and reassurance in light of that knowledge - iyswim. So, she wouldn't just fob me off, as she knew I really was anxious.

I turned down the referral to a clinical psych in the end but they do do such referrals so you might ask for one if you think it would be helpful. You've waited so long for this pregnancy, and hopefully after the dating scan you can start to actually enjoy it :)

Pipbin · 31/12/2014 11:43

I've got my scan date through. It's not until the 19th of January. I'll be 13+3 by then!

sparechange · 31/12/2014 12:31

pip My scan is the same day
My booking in appointment is 4 days before it, which seems a bit odd - shouldn't they scan you to confirm everything is ok before booking you into the system?

Pipbin · 31/12/2014 12:44

I had my booking in a week ago Monday.
What I find odd is that no one has checked I'm actually pg. I could be making it all up!

Nice to have a scan friend. How many weeks will you by then?

RevoltingPeasant · 31/12/2014 14:19

Booking in goes first to 'get you in the system' I think. It kind of makes sense as if (which will NOT happen to any of you, I'm sure) you were to have a MMC then you are at least in the system as a pg woman, which means you get appropriate aftercare and also the pg is registered so if you have further problems you can be fast-tracked for investigations. Plus you need to know stuff at 8w like taking folic acid, not drinking etc - I know, I know, we all know this, but not everyone will.......

win and feather I am having a baby clothes conundrum: we got loads of clothing from a very generous friend so I wasn't going to buy anything. But then yesterday when snooping around Mothercare (as one does!) I saw they had quilted sleep suits which looked really cosy, and it occurred to me.... my friend's baby was born in July so all her clothing is just one layer of cotton. Is that enough? Do I needed quilted or padded clothing for an early Feb baby?

Last night when we got in after work the thermostat said 9.5 degrees Shock in the living room and the house isn't well-insulated so even if we leave the heating on all day it's often not much more than 15/16 degrees. Would you be splashing out on warmer clothing for indoors??

greatbigbushybeard · 31/12/2014 17:25

Oh rp some extra layers might be useful. I think think about the kinda layers to would wear to keep warm in the house & apply same logic to baby. If worried have a chat to your mw.

Dh & I are having the conversation about what to tell our friends tonight about me not drinking. They'll all guess but I'm saying I'm not drinking & that's it! We've both said we don't want to say anything before 12 week scan. Not sure I'm going to last the night, been conking out before 12 most nights and feeling but iffy!! Oh well!!

lentil sounds like a good plan.

spare & pip exciting re scan dates! all starting to get more real.

Anyway, happy new year berries, may 2015 be a good one for all from the berry contingent!!

RevoltingPeasant · 31/12/2014 18:57

Erm okay I just did a first session of perineal massage, and... It hurts and I think I cut myself or somehow split the skin on my perineum. Ouch :(

Is anyone else doing it, and are you using some kind of oil? I am just using water based lube.....

Oh and also Happy New Year, more cheerfully!

ladybunnikins · 31/12/2014 19:06

There is one on amazon and possibly also on prescription called Elastolabo. Not used it though and don't know if it is any better than almond oil. Just can't face the thought of it! Would it help getting your partner involved?

nolly3 · 31/12/2014 19:54

Sadly after 6 hours in a foreign a&e we've found out the spotting was a precursor to sad news. no sac, low hormones. hope all goes well with you all over the next few months and really hope I can rejoin you. rp and win and feather best of luck for next month

sparechange · 31/12/2014 20:20

Oh Nolly, I'm so so sorry.
Look after yourselves and I hope the next few days are as bearable as possible xx

ladybunnikins · 31/12/2014 20:21

Oh god, so sorry Nolly, it's not fair. Thanks

RevoltingPeasant · 31/12/2014 21:04

Nolly I'm so sorry. It isn't fair. Take good care of yourself. You will be back with us. Flowers

winohhh · 31/12/2014 21:35

Oh nolly, so sorry. What a shitty shitty thing to happen. Please take care of yourself. XxxFlowers

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