Sum up your experience of pregnancy in a sentence or less

[jalapenobusiness]

Hello all

I was just wondering if you could sum up your experience of pregnancy in one sentence or less - the more humorous the better ....

1st pregnancy: Exhausted and tearful
2nd pregnancy: Tired and nauseous
3rd pregnancy: Tired but easy
4th pregnancy: Tearful and anxious

Fucking awful, never again, worst time of my life!

Nine months of exhaustion and constant sickness while trying and failing not to let down colleagues and family.

Couldn't stop vomiting.

Vomit, pain and a never ending house move.

An anxiety-ridden, exhausting, nauseous means to an end.

Bloody stressful.

OK at the time but left me with a stomach that looks like it's been badly attacked by a tiger.

Wanted it to be wonderful but it was dreadful!

Sick as a dog.

Most anxious, stressful period of my life EVER!!

Horrific but worth all the puke, spd and bleeding in the end

Painful, exhausting, emotional, grump-making, anxiety ridden and exhausting!

But my lo is almost worth it!

overcome with tiredness, but easier than I thought, amazing experience.

To buck the trend a bit (I was lucky):

Exciting
Anxious
A little nauseous
Labour - Worst pain ever experienced
Relief (post blissful epidural and at the end when all over and baby here safely)

I would call pregnancy for me, the twilight zone. Particularly number 4 below.

Twilight zone:

1. A dilapidated, decaying area of a city or town.

2. The lowest depth of an ocean to which light can penetrate

3. Any area or state transitional or indefinite in character

4. A place of supernatural and frighteningly unpredictable happenings.

Body like a prison.

Generally lovely but long

First pregnancy: exciting, scary, tiring, weird (having something growing inside you)
Second pregnancy: exhausting (toddler plus commute), less scary

DS1: Easy, nurturing, blooming, glowing, wonderful experience resulting in a calm and short hypnobirth.

DS2: Bleeding, worry, exhaustion, norovirus, constant contractions, distressed baby, anti-contraction meds followed by a slightly longer labour with a blessed epidural which was the schizz.

I was honestly very lucky with both pregnancies, despite them being totally different. Although I didn't enjoy my second pregnancy as much due to the worry over constant contractions and monitoring, physically I felt well.

Both pregnancies very easy and enjoyable, despite indigestion with nearly all food that wasn't supremely bland with DC1 (seemed to have a lot of vanilla milkshakes though )

At its best like being in a weird religion with bizarre food taboos; at its worst like serious flu; never enjoyable.

Full, round, anxious and exciting all at once. I love pregnancy, all the bad and the good too.

I've never moaned so much in my entire life!!

Awful but amazing, completely worth the physical hell.