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Pregnancy after miscarriage - part 4

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mygirllolipop · 08/08/2006 14:39

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firststar · 30/11/2006 14:40

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Daisybump · 01/12/2006 13:52

Had my booking appointment today...midwife tried to listen for the heartbeat but couldn't get anything...I'm only just 12 weeks, so she said not to be too disheartened as it's hit and miss whether you can pick up on a hand held doppler at this stage, depending on whether the bean is at the top or bottom of your uterus. Have my offical dating scan next Wednesday...so not long to wait for more pictures. I didn't tell her that I'd paid for a private scan two weeks ago and had heard the baby's heartbeat then as I was scared they'd cancel my NHS dating scan next week...and I for one want as much re-assurance as possible that things are OK. Do feel a bit guilty knowing how the NHS are overstretched, but....
I hope everyone is well. MS not so bad at all now, only the odd day of feeling crap. Even feeling like I can start to socialise again, and am planning a late night chrimbo shopping trip tonight so I must be getting better.

firststar · 01/12/2006 14:12

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time4tea · 01/12/2006 22:31

hello Daisybump, good to hear that all's going well. for my booking appt they said they wouldn't do a doppler because it wouldn't show up, so don't be disheartened. hope everyone else is doing OK - its been a bit quiet the last few days. I'm still flat out with relief that the thyroid test ended up ok... makes me remember what a high level of emotion we have caring for/worrying with these precious beanies, although it does get better as time goes on. good luck all XXXXXX

firststar · 03/12/2006 21:20

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time4tea · 04/12/2006 08:38

First-Star, the waiting around for appts is awful - although bear in mind, once the letter comes, you'll have a moment of relief and then start hopping up and down waiting for the appt itself.... how far along are you?

nice activities and good food are the only things that help, in my experience.

Good luck. XXXXXX T4T

hope all well with everyone else -

Daisybump · 04/12/2006 14:16

hope we are all well this morning....did my Christmas shopping, and after working all day, we hit the shops at 6:30.....by 9:30 I hadn't had anything to eat and my feet were so sore, DH had to practically carry me to the car. Then we went to get some food and after a half hour wait, ate my starter so quickly that I threw it all up again...and only just made it to the toilets in time....not a good advert for Frankie and Benny's, me rushing to the loo with my hand over my mouth LOL!! Still, at least I managed to eat my main course in a civilised manner and keep it down. I then spent the rest of the weekend recovering, so maybe I'm not feeling as smug about lessening ms as I was!
Got a bit of bad news at the weekend....a good friend of mine who was about four weeks behind me has had a mc and it's been a bit of an emotional rollercoaster for me. Want to give her lots of tlc, but I think i'm the last person she wants to be around at the moment. Also brought it all flooding back to me....not quite sure how to handle things apart from letting them both know that DH and I are here for them....any advice would be welcome.

time4tea · 04/12/2006 16:23

hello Daisy bump, on what to say when a friend has a mc, it is a difficult one. From my experience, I didn't want pg friends to think I might resent them, or find it difficult/embarassing to talk to me. So messages saying "I feel for you/there if you need me" are great, but you could also follow up in a couple of weeks (or whatever) with a normalish invitation for a date out - or, if you really think she might find being with a pregnant person difficult, ask another friend to do this, I really think people give the bereaved a bit of a wide berth, and this adds to isolation. From my experience of bereavement, "thinking of you..." is nice but "let me know if there is anything I can do" just made me think.. I'd like something, but I'm not sure what I need to feel better. I received some flowers (something that hardly ever happens!!) and they really cheered the place up, another friend gave me a really absorbing novel which I enjoyed. I suppose anything that your friend might just enjoy is the answer - this can be a good reminder that enjoyment is possible.

Daisybump · 04/12/2006 17:48

Thanks for that T4T ...I've been there myself so I know how she must be feeling. One of my work colleagues was pregnant when I had my first mc and I was dreading getting back to work. She sent me a really nice e-mail and a card and that helped to break the ice. I also got sent flowers, which was really nice, so I think we may do that for her and her DH

OonaghBhuna · 04/12/2006 20:08

Daisybump, I went through the same thing recently. My really close friend was 4 weeks behind me and she miscarried at 17 weeks.It took me back to my m/c where it had taken years to conceive . Also everyone I knew at the time was pg.I think it will always bring a tear to my eye thinking of what happened and the horror of it all.
As we at opposites ends of the country I couldnt see her so I have been phoning her and texting her frequently. I also sent a card.She said she loves getting the texts because it reminds her that theres someone out there thinking of her. it has been really tough especially since most of her friends are expecting babies. She has a DS so she at least she has him.

firststar · 05/12/2006 17:16

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firststar · 05/12/2006 17:18

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time4tea · 06/12/2006 08:12

good for you FirstStar to ring up and insist on an early scan. will be keeping fingers crossed for you for the next two weeks. good also to get it out of the way before Christmas, gives you a bit of peace of mind.

take care all, hope everyone's feeling ok XXXXXX

Christmas this year is all being done via the web - I am as big as a house (even at 7 months) and fear for the safety of other shoppers and shop assistants if there is a tired, low-blood-sugar T4T rampaging around the streets of London shopping . On the other hand, I don't mind wrapping - we are doing it on the cheap, getting DS to make festive potato-prints on brown paper, which keeps him happy for a few hours... at 2 and a half he's enjoying his advent calendar, but is still too young to be demanding about lots of presents, so I'm going to enjoy it this year...

love to all XXXXXXX

Daisybump · 06/12/2006 08:51

Just wait time4tea....after spending a fortune on our DS in Toys'R'us last week, he's suddenly decided that transformers are his new best friend and is bleating on about Santa bringing them. Tried to suggest that Santa has already done his shopping and maybe if he gets money or vouchers from the rellies than he can buy his own, but he said 'we can just write another list to Santa asking for some more toys!'
Got my scan later on this morning....and although we went private for one three weeks ago and all was well, I'm still feeling really nervous. I'm sure it's all fine, but my poor DH, I've been like a bear with a sore head this morning and over-reacting to everything.
Firststar, glad you've got things moving on the scan front and I hope everything is well...it's only a couple of weeks to wait. It's a tense time, but everyone on here really helped me through my anxieties. It amazes me sometimes how slow things are with the NHS...I saw my doc at 5 weeks and he said he'd do me an urgent referral to the mw because of previous mcs and immune system disorder....I had my booking at 12 wks and my scan is today at 12+5...if that's urgent, what is the normal service like around here (lol in a sarcastic stylee)!!

firststar · 06/12/2006 09:43

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littlefrog · 06/12/2006 09:44

Hello everyone, it's been ages since I've been here - life has rather run away with me, and it's been hard enough just keeping on top of work, builders, and ordinary life. Good to hear that things are going well for people - really glad to hear that you got your earlier scan, firststar, although it does seem ages away for an 'emergency'. I went to my gp in a panic at something like 5 weeks with this one, saying I had a pain in my side (which was true, and which terrified me, as my first mc was a suspected ectopic) and got a scan that day. Plus another two weeks later, and they also said come back again if you feel you need to (I didn't, as I find scans really emotionally difficult - too much turmoil). It seems to depend SO much on where in the country you are - it's not fair how NHS provision varies so much.
Good luck for this morning daisybump, and I sympathise SO much with the bad temper beforehand. I'm sure your DH understands.
T4T: very wise to be doing the shopping over the internet. We're giving lots of relatives pots of tulip bulbs (got the bulbs, need to buy the pots) but they'll all have to come and collect them as we don't have a car, and pots on a bicycle don't work well! Am a bit stumped for ideas for everyone else - any bright ideas?
Hope everyone else is well.

firststar · 06/12/2006 09:49

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firststar · 06/12/2006 09:53

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Daisybump · 06/12/2006 13:07

Back from the hospital and everything is fine....even got a wave . They've changed my date again...I've gone from EDD by dates of 18 June, to EDD by 9.5 week scan of 15 June, to EDD by todays scan of 10 June. At this rate I'll be done by the end of April!! 10 June seems right as I do ovulate very early in my cycle and the same happened with DS.
All these Christmas ideas are really nice. I always falter with my relatives and go for the three for two at Boots. The handmade paper is a nice touch too...might have to copy that as I have some star stamps and silver and gold paint left over from decorating DS's bedroom.
Try to keep your chin up firststar....

firststar · 06/12/2006 13:39

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time4tea · 06/12/2006 13:49

First-star, there have been a few exchanges on this thread and others about symptoms/lack of and what this means. Consensus seems to be - nothing is definite, just try to take it easy.

Nice Christmas ideas - especially the tulip bulbs. Cooking biscuits cakes etc is lovely. Internet shopping is all very well but am currently stuck in the house waiting for a delivery, DS has gone for nap but i can't in case the van comes and I need to go to the door in my nightie

lovely to hear from you all, it had all gone a bit quiet recently.
XXXX

firststar · 06/12/2006 13:59

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Daisybump · 06/12/2006 14:10

Firststar...I had lots of twinges and gripes with this one and a bit of bleeding at 6 and a half weeks which they put down to me overdoing things a bit...I'd been for a weekend in Blackpool wiht the girls and was decorating at home! I think that after mcs you become so attuned to every slight twitch and it sets you off. I know it's hard but try not to worry too much. I'm sending buckets of sticky stuff your way!!

firststar · 06/12/2006 14:13

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firststar · 06/12/2006 16:46

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