Mum's-to-be

[jodee]

I hope no-one thinks this thread is too 'exclusive' or 'cliquey', but I can no longer join in with the weight loss thread, so I thought I would start this one up!

I wish I had had the benefit of the internet (and especially Mumsnet, of course!) first time around and felt pretty isolated after ds was born, so it's good to have some 'virtual' friends in the same boat now I'm expecting no 2.

It would be interesting as well to find out just how many of us are pregnant, there must be loads of us! and just to have a general chinwag.

Malmo mum...I take my ds (24 months) with me, the midwife is fine about it. I'm also not the only one, various other pregnant mums waiting have their other children with them.

I think it also helps ds understand that something is happening in mummy's tummy etc.

I was wondering if this was the case in the UK (paid no attention first time round). When I turned up for my scan last week with dh and ds in tow we were greeted with 'You can't bring him in here' (ds rather than dh).

Purposefully ignoring this we sat down to wait in an area with some toys in. When dh told reception where we were sitting they explained:

-we can't be responsible for calling you if you are not the right place (10 yds away rather than 5 yds)

• you can't sit over there as that's the waiting area for deaf children waiting to go their appointments

When the radiographer came out to call me in and greeted me with another, 'you can't bring him in' I threw a wobbly. She then relented as long as I would stop bubbing. First I went in and had the scan the dh and ds joined me. We went through everything again thus taking twice as long and would have got the same result if dh and ds had joined me from the beginning.

Retched systems. Norwegian DH seems to get more irate with all this than I do. Dragging a pg friend along to sit with ds for my appointment tomorrow.

Anyhow, when dh pointed out the baby's heart to ds he repeated back a perfect 'heart' so that was a moment to make my own heart glow.

malmomum, didn't realise you meant at scans....no our hospital also doesn't like children at the scans. It says on the appointment letter (IN BIG BOLD WRITING LIKE IT'S SHOUTING AT YOU OFF THE PAGE I HASTEN TO ADD!!). Young children are not permitted at the intial time of scan as the radiographer has to concentrate on the exmanination being carried out, however, once the scan has been completed, younger siblings & other relatives may join you to look at the baby on screen.

I must admit this does make sense to me and there's no harm done as such, everyone gets what they want. I remeber being told at my last scan about a small problem with the baby which I got quite upset about at the time & was very tearful, dh comforted me and to be honest it was quite a relief that my ds wasn't present at that time. He came into see the baby once I was more composed so there is that side to it.

With regard to normal midwife appointments, ds attends with me with no problems.

Many congrats to you all I am due on 5th June, I am now nearly 29 weeks. I feel for you all with morning (all day) sickness hope you all feel better soon. Sorry I have no miracle cures but if it helps in my experience it does eventually go (16 weeks in first pregnancy and 19 weeks or so in this pregnancy). Someone mentioned they were thinking of a home birth (sorry so many messages I forget who) if they will allow you go for it. It must be wonderful much more relaxing than a hospital birth and I would imagine less painful because of this. Unfortunately cannot have a home birth myself because of Group B Strep and having to have IV antibiotics in labour. If anyone else carries this I can recommend the support group at www.gbss.org.uk. All the best to you all as your pregnancies progress!!!

I have had 3 scans with this pregnancy and have taken husband and 3yr old with me on every occassion. We haven't ever been told that they couldn't come with me. My last pregnancy I took husband, sister, nephew and mother-in-law to scan to find out sex of the baby and we were all welcomed into the tiny room!!!

Lil - how are you getting on with your 'Easter Egg'? The 1st is getting near! Everything is fine at this end. Have been trying to do nice things with my son before the shock hits him :-)

I've just had first scan at 12 wks and my hospital letter clearing stated in bold black type "only one adult (no children) can accompany you". I'm lucky as my mum lives 10 mins drive away so can always get her to take dd who's 17 mths and really wud distract the staff. I don't intend to take her for any antenatals as she's a bit young to understand why the baby can't just come out if it's in there but nearer the due date I'll start to explain. My sister has just had a baby boy and dd has already poked him in the eye and tried to lie beside him/on top of him in his chair/recliner thingy with shoes all over his little tummy!! I'm a nervous wreck when we visit and I don't want to make her resent babies but if nephew grows up with sight problems and squint I'll be held accountable by brother in law. I know she'll love her new baby brother or sister but perhaps a bit too much!

can I put the cat amongst the pigeons and ask that peolpe do take children with them to a/n appts. After all this is a service for women of childbearing age therfore many of them will have children. If staff find this hinders their work then the service providers should design a more child friendly approach.
It seems to me that the uk is very childphobic and we need to fight it.
Btw I think this also goes for labouring women who want their family with them and for visiting mums afterwards.

I find my doctors and hospital very child friendly. After the birth I will only be allowed 2 visitors at a time but that doesn't include dh or dd. So I could actually have 4 visitors around my bed at a time. I enjoy taking people with me for appt's for support and also to share my experience with them.

My older boy has been welcome at all my antenatal appointments. As they have all been during working hours they would hardly expect you to organise childcare. Toys have always been on hand and as appointments are only about 15 mins long it is usually within a small child's attention span. One exception was the detailed 20 week scan where they asked you to not bring older children. However I did bring my son but my husband came with me to keep him occupied and everything was fine.

Freudian slip there!! I am saying "older boy" and I've not even had the baby yet - does this mean it will be a boy?! :-)

My hospital and midwife have been really good about my ds, aged 3 attending appointments, including both scans. My midwife especially is great, she allows him to stand on a step next to me and hold the thing that lets them pick up the heartbeat. It is really nice and makes him feel involved. She also lets him swing on her chair and he doesn't want to leave!

How sweet Eulalia, 'Easter Egg' is a nice way of putting it. So I guess that means I should tell my little boy that the Easter bunny is bringing him a brother or sister, not the Stork!! Glad all is well with you. I am starting to feel tired again, I have forgotten how big you get at the end (especially sideways on in the mirror!), and am counting the days. Did you go to the NHS ante-natal classes for 2nd time mums? There's only 2, but they've really got me into baby mode. All the class got all emotional when they saw the breast feeding video - the baby seemed so tiny, just can't wait!!

lil, I'm interested by what you say, do they run a special ante-natal for 2nd time mums then? My midwife hasn't made this clear, she just said they are the normal ante-natal classes. Part of me thinks whats the point but then part of me thinks well, things may have changed & I may pick up some new friends like last time. Still in contact with my previous ante-natal class mums (&babies).

Dixie, yes they are different NHS classes for the 2nd time mum. Just 2 mornings - one is lead by a health visitor and talks about dealing with toddlers and a new baby, plus the mandatory breast feeding video - and the 2nd is lead by a midwife who has more of an open forum and you chat about the birth and resolve any problems. They also encourage you to keep in touch by photocopying everyone's name and address. I'm really glad I went - just make sure you book early!

Glad to hear you are keeping well Lil. I was at the midwife yesterday and apparently I missed the ante-natal refresher class as she forgot to tell me about it. However she has offered to come round to the house to talk about the birth and she has videos she can offer me. I also keep in touch with 2 mums from my first born's so am not terribly keen to meet new mums, besides there is a rash of new babies in one of the playgroups I go to.

I really like being pregnant so am not one of those ones desparate to give birth. I love waking in the morning and feeling my bump kicking. I actually missed my bump the last time - hubby couldn't understand that. I do have more backache this time though so am glad time is getting near, and laying out the baby clothes last w/e is making me feel excited.

I have just received my appointment for my 16 week scan in just over a week and there is no note to say not to bring ds so he will be coming with us.
Im not having a good weekend, keep being sick (16 weeks now and thought it would have gone away by now). Help on the food front needed, none of my old faithfulls are working.

Poor you Joe, although I covet your 16 week scan...I felt much better last week despite not being 12 weeks so the midwife booked me a scan just to check everything was OK and I saw the little mite wriggling around and waggling its arms and legs - bless!

Nausea still bad in the morning and still getting food cravings but it does seem to have subsided somewhat.

Food...hmmm...so the french toast isnt working?? I felt sick untill 17 weeks with dd so don't worry, theres still time. Have you tried Sainsburys lemon curd farmhouse yogurts? Grapefruit juice? Cheese on toast with marmite under the cheese is my new thing, although I still prefer not to have to make it myself...

What do you fancy? Savoury things or sweet things? I ate practically a whole tub of Ben n Jerrys a few days ago...watch that weight pile on!!!

Enid feeling better today, although feeling sick I havnt been and dont feel poorly. I dont really know what I fancy, I have just been shopping and I have nearly eaten the fench stick I had bought to go with the lasagne for tea. Definately couldnt face lemon curd yougarts. Prawn cocktail crisps are quite nice right now and fruit so I stocked up on that. See how we go this week. It must have lovely having your scan, mine is on 5/4 so not long to wait.

I loved roast chicken crisps right at the beginning but couldn't bear them now...rather partial to mini pork pies with cheese and pickle. WHY WHY WHY arent I craving lettuce and broccoli!!! I can't believe a diet of pork pies and Honey I'm Home (new ben n jerrys...) can be very good for the baby...

Enid its doing fine so far with all the other funny things you have been eating I havnt fancied ice cream at all, im hoping that will change I need to fit into the new maternity jeans I bought at the weekend and keep falling down (I cant fit into any of my the other clothes now and I broke the zip on my fav trousers the other day).

Delighted to see that Kate Moss is pregnant and due around the same time as me - so we can compare getting our figures back after the birth

And don't forget Victoria Beckham, Enid - she's at a similar time too, isn't she?!

I think VB is due in September, not my due date of 18th I hope.

BTW no being sick for two days yipeeeee