The Elderberry helicopter, for nub debates, holey tights and boxing pirate scans

[Tallyra]

Open to all elderberry grads and anyone who fits the berry criteria: over 30, 1st to early 2nd trimester(ish) with #1 after trying for a loooong time, and nervous as hell. Come on in for handholding and nub theory!

[Foodylicious]

www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2321147/No-talks-morning-sickness-bloating-excess-hair-headaches-Expectant-mother-Ashley-Person-says-Fight-Club-pregnancy.html

[Tallyra]

great article! some of the commenters made me a bit . though. just because people think some things they really shouldn't say them all!

[BelissimaLol]

Tally and poppy please do join us on fb!!!! The more the merrier
Thund oh dear have you managed to fit into your party dress??? Hope you're looking forward to it xx

[BlindKitty]

merk didn't realise we were scan buddies? What time 6th is yours?

boom whenever I'm around my mum or dad for too long for some bizarre reason I seem to regress about 20 years and start acting like a petulant teenager again until I've had a word with myself. Maybe mr boom just has 'petchulant teenager syndrome'?

Re your contract, I've spoken to my HR. as long as you've had your unconditional offer through your absolutely fine. The trust had 2 months to actually sort your final contract so may not happen any time soon. If they were to treat you unfairly you could sue their asses big time which would make up not getting decent maternity pay. Re uniforms, I would just tell them now. You might piss them off if you mess them about ordering the wrong uniforms. Also, they might want to risk assess you working on the ward for health and safety reasons. Fwiw, my contact was genuinely concerned that you were worried about this and really wanted to talk to you so obviously had to tell her you were from a completely different trust!

thunder why don't you just embrace the baby bump tubbiness . I've been stroking my muffin top all week. I'm only 11weeks so it's clearly just haribo!!'

[CatsCantFlyFast]

My scan is 8.55 so luckily not much time to get anxious beforehand... you?

Boom hope you are being spoiled rotten by Mr Boom to make up for him being a noob

[Boomgoestheweasel]

Kitty that's exactly it, he's regressed! In fairness, it's not just him, it's his entire family who bicker and pick at each other, it's just miserable being around them sometimes. Merk I didn't want to just let him off the hook when he was just apologising so I wouldn't be mad at him, he didn't see that anything was wrong with his behaviour. I'm still annoyed with him, he just never admits when he's being completely unreasonable. Went and drove to my friend's house and had a cuppa and ignored him for a few hours though, do feel a bit better now!

Thunder, merk, I can't tell if I'm properly showing or not. Sometimes I think I am, today I think I just look a bit plump. Kitty I'm with you on the obvious stroking of midsection despite my previous hatred of women who did smug bump-rubbing in public Hope you manage to fit in your dress come Saturday thunder!

[Thundercatsarego]

That article made me chuckle. It is so true!

boom I meant to ask - why is the breast feeding bit back breaking for mws? kitty's advice and research seems great and probably sensible to tell them before they order uniform. Do they do maternity stuff?!

And yeah I do love the bit that's actually bump. I try to refrain from stroking it though! It has been pretty crampy today so I assume that is growing and stretching. Hope so anyway!

[Boomgoestheweasel]

thunder Because as a general rule mums are lying in bed to breastfeed, which only comes up to a certain height. So to help them you either have to bend over or sit on the bed and twist (and we're not supposed to sit on the bed anyway) or kneel next to the bed. Sometimes you're in that position for an hour trying to help the mums get the baby attached and check that the baby is feeding well. It's honestly such hard work!

Kitty sorry, didn't mean to ignore all your lovely advice bad Boom was skim reading thank you for finding out for me! Unfortunately I haven't had an unconditional offer, my offer is conditional upon my references, which my idiot of a mentor hasn't yet seen fit to write despite having had a month and a half to do so. I've chased her about it several times, asked her ward manager to chase her, there's only so much I can do. So I have absolutely nothing formal, just a phone call and an email telling me I have a conditional offer of a position - hence feeling so concerned! Of course I wouldn't order the wrong size uniform, I'm just hoping to delay ordering it until it's all out in the open.. I'll phone HR tomorrow and ask them what I can do, hopefully without giving them my name. I really do feel like it's all so shady, I'm so uncomfortable with the whole thing!

[Tallyra]

can't you raise the beds up? all the ones I've been in go pretty high!

[Boomgoestheweasel]

Yep, they raise up but not to a height where you don't have to stoop at all. Trust me, I've tried every possible position. One of the main complaints of midwives on postnatal wards is back pain. The problem is that mums have to be comfortable to breast feed, but that almost invariably requires the midwife to be bloody uncomfortable!

[BlindKitty]

merk 14.00 but at least I don't have to go back to work

boom hmm without that unconditional offer I might be tempted to stay quiet a little whole longer. Can you just offer another reference to speed up the process?

[Boomgoestheweasel]

I gave three referees, they've only asked the first two, one of whom hasn't responded. I did ask if they could just use the third, who I know will respond straight away, but they didn't seem to want to. I'm phoning them again in the morning, I'm starting to lose sleep over the whole situation which is just ridiculous!

[Foodylicious]

Boom Re helping to breast feed on wards - sounds like they need adjustable little stools on wheels like the ones hairdressers have!
What a nightmare with your references! hope you get it sorted soon

[CatsCantFlyFast]

Boom you are protected by the law regardless of your offer being unconditional. They would have to prove there was a valid reason other than the pregnancy to withdraw the offer. Don't worry, their HR department won't allow anything untoward

[Boomgoestheweasel]

Well girls, I gave up with HR, they're useless. Phoned my ward manager and told her instead, she was lovely about it. I'm going in to see her tomorrow. Massive weight off my shoulders now that it's out in the open!

[Boomgoestheweasel]

Foody we definitely need some of those stools!

[Foodylicious]

yay boom glad its made you feel better.

I am soo tired, really bad night last resulting in no sleep until after 5am!
3 wees in 2 hours, then sick at 2am 2 more wees and lots and lots of painful trapped wind, retching and general uncomfyness.
Have MW booking appt at 11.30 so likely napping this afternoon
Dr has extended my sick note until the 11th so need to meet up with my manager and occy health to discuss how they are happy to have me at work. At the moment I would not be able to do normal shifts/be counted in the numbers etc but could prob get a fair bit of paperwork done (in between being a bit sicky). Its about whether they are happy having me back like this, reviewing it every week or 2. Really don't want to stay off but can't see how I could have possibly gone to work today for example. Unfortunately I don't have much AL left so cant use that to reduce hours or at short notice.

Really quite nervous about appt today - not really sure why, think it will be hard as i had had the appt before the mc - feeling quite teary about it all.
Anyway, need to get my arse in the shower if I am going to make it on time.

[Boomgoestheweasel]

Sorry you've had such a rough night foody, hope your appointment went well. Was it your booking? (sorry, I've lost track a bit..)

When will you speak to work? Hope they're sympathetic and let you go back on an ad-hoc basis, fingers crossed!

[Foodylicious]

thanks boom
appt was ok, and yes it was booking. Feeling a bit more positive about things.
I mentioned to her that I needed to sort out getting back to work soon and she looked at me like I was mad! Said this was a rubbish time for a lot of people and that I should be kind to myself and get 'this bit' over with before I go back. Was going to speak to work soon-ish but the sickness and nausea is getting worse so maybe not yet.

[Foodylicious]

Also seems my trust have changed their guidelines following a Lletz procedure. They used to refer you for consultant care if you had had 2-3, now they refer everyone who has had one. So that is me referred. Don't think I will get an appointment for ages though.

Anyone know anymore? I know I am not the only one here to have had a Lletz.

[Boomgoestheweasel]

Just thee 'n' me on here today foody! Must be something we said..

Glad your appointment went ok, your mw sounds spot on. If you're not up to it, you're not up to it!

I'm not a lletzer, I know someone mentioned it a couple of pages ago though..

In Boomworld, today has been a good day: dogs have behaved, had a lovely walk in the sunshine, no work tonight so putting my feet up and finding some trashy telly to watch. Also have officially made the announcement on FB as just couldn't be bothered with texting everyone and their uncle, so my secret is now well and truly out!

[qazxc]

Hi everybody.

I have turned into a zombie! I am permanently tired, my brain has turned to mush even though i go to bed at 6.30 (yes 6.30 I shit you not). I don't sleep properly because i have weird dreams/ nightmares. Having said that i am seeing it as a good omen before my scan, surely if i'm having symptoms it's a good sign.

[Tallyra]

congrats boom, nice to tell everyone isn't it?

foody, at my scan this morning the doctor noticed lletz on my notes so put a note for my 20wk one to check cervix length, apparently it can shorten it somehow and therefore cause for concern in some way. she checked on the scan today anyway, saying it should be over 25 and mine was 41 so she thinks it'll be fine. I think that was mm. I'll ask the mW on Friday if I remember too. I got 2 scan photos today, one baby and one cervix. lovely!

[PuppyMummy]

Hi everyone, hope ur all ok. on phone so can't remember all the news to link back to!

im having a poop day despite being on holiday cos am having another wobbly 'not feeling pregnant' day again due to total lack of symptoms except being stupidly tired. actually think it might be better to be busy at work!
Still 4 weeks til scan too. Aaaarrrrrgghhhh! this is actual torture!

kitty when you poas did it work? I seem to hav in my head that it might not past 8 weeks. am I making that up???

I might poas when we get home to reassure myself...

[Foodylicious]

Hee Hee boom must watch what we say it seems...
Not too worried tally, I am glad its being checked routinely now as i was going to ask them to check it anyway. From what I understand occasionally some women need a 'stitch', but seems rare. yay to your scan pic
qazxc I too am with you taking symptoms as being a good sign, so was my MW today. when is your scan?


I get so lost with where everybody is! is this about right?
A few not on here yet

Foody, 7wks
Puppy, 8wks
Kitty, 10+6 (EDD 21st may)
Brodicea, 13 wks (EDD 4th May)
Boom, 14wks (EDD 22 April)
Poppy, 14 wks (EDD 23 April)
Tally, 15wks (EDD 17 April)
Merk, 18+3 (or 4)
Thunder, 19wks (EDD 20th March)