Pregnant (IVF) Worriers (part two)

[Shazzamattazzerly]

Hi everyone,

This thread is for all you incessant worriers out there, not necessarily limited to IVF-ers, although I get the feeling the people who have had trouble TTC are more prone to worrying than others! We have filled our first thread (www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/1721178-Pregnant-IVF-Worriers) but there is more worrying to do so here we are.

A few of us graduated from the IVF thread (link below) and are having a go at our own thread to get out of the other IVF-ers hair! So get your roomy jogging bottoms on for some virtual hand holding, mutual symptom spotting and staying sane until the next scan date.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1691674-Excellent-Egg-Buddies-continued-Anyone-having-IVF-ICSI-in-Jan-Feb-and-March-2013-please-join-us

Cheese! (How I miss cheese on this dairy free diet! Shaz, there mustn't be much left you can eat.)

I'm not sure about cobbles expat, logic would say the bigger the wheels the better and maclarens don't have huge ones. I'd have a look at other people pushing prams over the cobbles and see what happens. (Lovely bouncing belly too, any freakish elbows / knees sticking out yet?)

Oh and try Aveeno cream for eczema. It's brilliant.

shazza I sympathise re money worries. DH went freelance just before I found out I was pg w DS and we were already broke because I had been re-training. I only got statutory maternity pay and we could barely pay the rent. Luckily there was loads and loads of free baby stuff on freecycle and my parents bought us a pushchair. DS slept in a free second hand moses basket until he was about 8 months; we had a TINY one bedroom flat. It was all fine though in the end but very stressful.

gin and mrshy I sympathise re increased appetite. I weighed myself yesterday and I've gained 1 stone 4lb at week 22! I didnt' think I had been eating that much and have really not been at the ice cream or chocolate but I am trying to tell myself it's because I have a large bump already and not panic. I hated losing the baby weight with DS, it took me over a year.

I have been feeling a lot of wiggles but not a bouncing bump yet, expat. I am really looking forward to that bit.

mariana the bumpology book looks at whether eliminating foods like dairy from the mother's diet made any difference to colic and crying and there was no evidence it did. I can't remember the details and you may want to do it anyway but I thought I would mention it.

I've had a fun but very tiring weekend with friends over for Sunday lunch. Not looking forward to work, it's very full on at the moment.

Hi to everyone else!

thanks ladies I do appreciate your support

expat my miscarriages were missed miscarriages so needed intervention

spotting and little symptoms, we shall see on Wednesday

buzzy some people spot the whole time due to cervical erosion. If your scan is ok you could ask for a visual exam of your cervix to rule that out. I had it in one pregnancy and it made me feel better to know where the spotting was coming from.

fairy, thanks. I know it's tenuous but I'm trapped now as every time she has a bad attack I think it's because I had a bit of milk in tea in a cafe! I don't really miss milk and therefore it's not too onerous for now, although I'm probably going to go back to reduced dairy at 12 weeks. It seemed from the reading I did that there was a potential connection with cows milk protein, caffeine and citrus, that is suggested by research evidence, although certainly not proven beyond doubt. I have a niece who had a severe cows milk protein allergy, I have a seafood allergy and my sister has a peanut allergy so there's a family history too.

Freecycle is great, I'd be putting stuff on there if I didn't have a conveniently pregnant cousin in need of stuff.

I'm impressed by all the exercising going on too, I will start something in a month or two.

Morning girls

MrsH sounds like you had a lovely weekend with the massage and films. Re exercise once you get into a routine with the DVDs it's not too bad. Bearing in mind that my idea of exercise pre pregnancy was a spin round the ballroom once a week. Which DVDs did you get? Do they have short workouts as well? I find short bursts easier to cope with. Sounds like you are sorted re mat wear. I keep worrying I don't have enough for the summer. But when is it ever really hot for any extended period?

Mariana I also miss cheese on toast. The diet isn't too bad once you get used to it. I just have to be creative. But I also feel trapped by it now so i Understand how you feel there. It's not working but I feel unable to give it up just in case. Hope you had a good day yesterday.

Fairy thanks for the reassurance. Sounds like you had a similar experience with DS. I know we will find a way to cope in the short term. I can't see a way out of the trap of life being expensive and needing to work. Im desperate to move out of London in the hope life will be cheaper and less stressful. But maybe it's the same everywhere and I'm just kidding myself. Re weight gain. I got scales over the weekend and also got abit of a shock. Obviously we are supposed to be gaining weight but I haven't owned scales for 20 years after having ishoos like many teenage girls. Seeing the numbers rising brings back memories of that so I'm having to not panic and keep noting that it will rise steadily. When did your wiggles start? I'm 17+5 and haven't felt anything.

Buzzy I'm sorry about the spotting. Only 2 more sleeps til your scan. Everything crossed for you.

Hello to everyone else.

I soooo don't want to go to work today. I'm telling myself that I'm doing it for shazlett so that I can save and we can be together for longer when she is here.
Slept really badly. Keep how are you getting on with your cushion? Are you sleeping better?

shazza i was feeling a bit of wiggling at 17 weeks but you feel it earlier with your second baby because your abdominal wall is thinner and you know what it feels like. It was very occasional though, not really definite until 20 weeks.

I understand the weight gain shock. To be honest, after I stepped on the scales I immediately started telling myself - must cut out cheese, no bread, etc all the usual self-berating and restricting I pledge and then fail to do when I am feeling overweight. But it's even less sensible and feasible when pregnant. With DS I stopped weighing myself once I had gained 2 stone and didn't weigh myself again until 2 weeks after giving birth. So I really don't know how much I put on in total but it didn't feel like that much after that point. There really is no point in weighing yourself a lot when pregnant and it only torments you if you are that way inclined. In my case it was not helped by my mother telling me (in a well meaning way, she was trying to reassure me) that she lost her baby weight with each of her children within 6 months no problem. I didn't and felt worse because I had hoped to be like her. It really is an individual thing. Just try to tell yourself that it is mostly baby plus the necessary to support and feed her once she's born.

buzzy a lot of us on this thread have had spotting, I did at 16 weeks, which freaked me out because I thought I was beyond the stage where it would just happen for no reason. The midwife I spoke to said that spotting happens for many many reasons and it can relate to something that happened weeks before.

Hi all,

I haven't been as active posting lately, so thought I'd check in. Nothing the matter. Just getting a bit fed up with talking about babies/pregnancies and twins the whole time (not with you personally of course, but just generally, with everyone). It was starting to stress me out a bit, looking at my list of things I need to get/do. I was starting to feel like this was taking over my life, which of course it is, but still, I needed to step back a little to gain some sense of perspective ... if that makes sense?

keep I think you mentioned Tracy Anderson. I am still on the Tracy bandwagon, graduated to Month Five. It is somewhat repetitive but I do feel like I am actually 'doing' something! I also found her post-preggo work out on the Youtubes. I can't find the link now, but if you search it on YT you'll find it. Saves a bit of money. It's quite full on though from what I've seen.

I also saw some comments on weight gain? I put on a stone now, but this is in the 'expected' range for twins. Well. According to tinterweb. I hope I haven't been looking on some American site for that advice!

My wriggling started at about wk 18-19. At wk 21 I could feel little kicks, like elastic bands being popped against your inside. I am pretty sure one has now turned around, because I can feel one kicking at the bottom of my belly. My husband still hasn't been able to feel any of the kicks. As soon as he puts his hand on, they stop! They tend to be most active early morning, when I just wake up. It still takes me by surprise sometimes, these random acts of activeness. God knows what they get up to in there.

I got an email over the weekend from one the twin pregnant ladies that I know (well, know of). She has DCDA twins like me and hers have come out now at 31wks4days. There were no emergency cots available at King's so they did a proper ambulance drive to St Peter's in Chertsey (of all places). They weigh 1.5 and 1.14 kgs. Oh my fucking god. (Surely it is OK to swear in this case) That is so incredibly small. So now I am shitting myself of course that this will happen to us. Horrible.

On prams. We bought the Out n About double pram. And am going to the New Nearly Sale on Sunday morning at JAGS in Dulwich. Hopefully some good stuff. Otherwise I end up driving around SE London every evening to pick up a £5 baby gym etc etc!

Right. Off to do a spinning class. See if I can still hoist my belly on the bike! (Oh, I got lots of comments this weekend in shops 'oh when's baby due?' with an undertone of ... surely it is imminent! :-)

Oh, and I didn't get any advice on doubling up on folic acid. I am seeing the consultant for the first time on Wed so I can ask? I am toying with the idea of requesting a home birth, just to scare the shit out of them (and securing a midwife for me myself and I, rather than having to shell out for a doula/leave it to whomever is on duty at King's that day - one can always chose to transfer to hospital to a later date!)

Would they allow a home birth for twins dildals? I guess they can't stop you. If so, that sounds like a sneaky plan...

I bet you £100 they will blanch at the request and then forbid it outright!

Fairy I know what you mean about the food pledges. But I'm making a huge effort not to regress by 20 years. You are absolutely right. This is all for the baby.

Dildals lovely to hear you are ok. Sorry you have been feeling stressed. I hope you feel better. It sounds like you have been getting organised with the pram and nearly new sale. That's a good idea. I'm going to check out NCT and see if there is anything in our area.

I'm so envious of the kicks and wiggles. I keep trying to concentrate to see if I feel anything but nothing yet. I guess I've got another couple if weeks to go.

Hello ladies
Posting in haste as about to go into an important meeting, but got the shock of my life earlier. Sorry for the details (but if I can't share with you, who can I share with). I went for a poo and when I wiped there was a lot of bright red blood. So I looked down in the bowl and it was very bloody. I promptly felt very sick until I wiped some more and established it was definitely coming from the back, not the front. I had this once before, when I worked out I was allergic to ibuprofen, but no idea why it's happening now. I phoned my MW and she has asked me to see the GP if it happens again. I then turned to Dr Google and self diagnosed with haemmarhoids (spelling completely wrong, sorry) or anal fissures. Oh the joy.
Really hope nobody is reading this and eating at the same time.. X

Shazz there is an NCT sale near us on the 29th of June, but we're on holiday then. And the twin club Nearly New Sale is in Sept! How not useful is that!

MrsH, when you've had your legs akimbo countless times for fertility treatments/scans/rummages, there is no such thing as tmi.

MrsHY1 you are right, if you can't share it here, where can you! Your google diagnosis sounds grand ... the joys of pregnancy ... hopefully the GP can put your mind at rest.

mariana my consultant has volunteered in Ethiopia in a maternity hospital so I have a feeling she might be quite down to earth!

Did everyone see that the Harmony test is being trialed in King's and another hospital with a view of providing it on the NHS! Bring it on!

mrshy that's a relief! I'm not ashamed to admit that I have had an anal fissure myself (brought on by being too stressed and not 'taking my time' in the loo (the toddler banging on the door had something to do with it too) ). It healed with some magic cream from the GP but I also had to be very careful not to get constipated. I have been taking magnesium supplements plus prunes since getting pg and that has worked really well.

Just popping in quickly to say mrshy I had something similar a few weeks ago. Well there wasn't loads of blood, more like a few spots and I stressed massively until I realised it wasn't from the baby hole, but rather the result of nasty scratchy work bog roll/piles! I found anusol (great name eh?), clears it up quickly.

Whilst on the subject of dodgy body parts, I'm on my way to the dentists as my wisdom tooth is playing up. I've heard of some connection between MC and dental infections, so thought I'd better get it checked out. Just have to remember not to take my pants off when ushered onto the leather chair in this clinic!

To add to stressy poo moments I freaked until I remembered I'd eaten a ton of beetroot.

Hope everyone is well. I saw that about the harmony test - great news.

What is DCDA?

I was in the original trial for Harmony (twice!) as I was having a CVS. I thought anything that might allow higher risk women to avoid CVS and amnio would be an amazing development.

^^

Dildals I hope that doesn't mean she will expect too much from you!

I've never had eating issues really. I never weighed myself when pregnant but mainly just ate what I fancied but took care to get 5 a day and my diet is generally healthy. I put on exactly two stone and I've retained one stone post natally that I think I'll lose without much effort over the next few months.

Eek at the scary blood MrsHY. I have damage from DD1's emergency forceps delivery so have to never get constipated. Lactulose, magnesium, water, fruit, All Bran and vegetables all help.

dildals I can imagine it does get all a bit much, I go in to work and everyday a very kind colleague asks if things are still ok, would be nice if she asked how my weekend is I haven't got out the first trimester yet, impressed with exercise regime you have going, DH said this weekend, have you gained all the weight you lost this year I said not fecking yet but I'll make a big effort this week to do so

mrsh the same happened to me, not lots of blood, perhaps I am a bit too forceful with old arse bullets, never TMI :)

well speaking of poo my cat is having a funny five which means she needs to have one

expat DCDA is the type of twins that have their own sac and own placenta. The 'safest' type of twins.

Now that we are on TMI topics anyway. Sex in pregnancy. Absolutely loving it. All vital parts involved in sex are so sensitive and, well, enlarged, I am ready for action in no time. And done in no time too TBH. If only I wasn't so tired!

Hi all. Seems we've all had a bit of a week. I get exactly what you mean dildals and buzzy, thanks to some loose lips at work almost everyone know and I'd much rather not talk about it all day, work is supposed to be my distraction frm mentalling!

All ok here but went to see my old consultant last week...scan was fine at10weeks now...consuktant was same one fro foetal care that looked after us when we lost dd during my last pg. she did a big cats bum face when she realised we were having twins (in her words) 'again?!'. Tried to explain that IVF clinic told us to out both back in as due to previous cycles failing and the poor quality of one of the embryos it was highly unlikely that both would implant. Hmm. She was quite nice, but just really stressed me out as was very 'realistic' and said things about not planning past 16 weeks/see how we go/at higher risk etc. which we knew, but it is difficult to be told. DH and I are trying to be positive...there's not a great deal we can do now other than taking care of me but I felt really down and as though I should stop looking forward and be a bit more cautious. Felt as though we'd been irresponsible in having 2 replaced despite asking that very question at the clinic. So the promptly stopped thinking/discussing/getting excited about any pregnancy type thing.
She did say itwasnt a huge risk, but as usual I focused on the negatives, typical!

So apologies for the absence, I have been stalking you all from afar though...

buzzy so pleased you saw a heartbeat. Hope weds goes well. dH scans in his job (hearts, not bambinos!) and says early on it is v difficult to get an accurate measurement so hope things work out well as things progress.
mariana I am in awe, you seem to have it all sussed and are a fountain of knowledge! You should write a book for ivf mentallers!
mrsHY that must have been terrifying for a moment! Motherhood brings all kinds of loveliness, doesn't it!
expat v jealous of your bouncing belly, dd1 used to flip all over the place when I had a bath and at 3in the morning. My belly used to look like a light switch flicking on and off. Now she is here she loves baths....and has only just started sleeping through, so I hope the bouncing belly is quiet at night for you!
shazza you seem to have loads of stuff in your area! Is this a London thing do you think? I live out in the sticks (literally...we have a gymkhana every other Sunday and everyone here plays cricket instead of football) and there is nothing! No NCT classes for miles and hardly any groups at all except for sure start stuff which I didn't like last time.
Crisps X

crisps I think its out of line for people to pass comment on you having 2 put back, Its quite common in IVF its not like you put 3-4 back, my sonographer new a nurse who had 5 put back, now that I would raise an eyebrow at. People need to respect that this was your decision and you looked at all the scenarios possible. Yes there are risks with twins but then I'd say there are risks full stop in pregnancy I'd love to be having twins myself, don't let these people put a dampener on what should be a happy time for you :)