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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Strange things people say ...

33 replies

nappyaddict · 01/05/2013 13:39

"it doesn't matter what sex the baby is as long as they are healthy."

I really don't understand this one. So if they aren't healthy then all of a sudden it matters to you if they are a boy or a girl?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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upanddown83 · 01/05/2013 13:41

Yip I love love as long as they've 10 fingers and 10 toes so if my baby's missing a finger I should be unhappy?

Original poster

nappyaddict · 01/05/2013 13:48

Am I strange for thinking my OP and "it doesn't matter what sex the baby is, the most important thing is that they are healthy" have totally different meanings?

OP posts:

roofio87 · 01/05/2013 14:16

yeah just a phrase that doesn't really mean what it says. I find myself saying "as long as its healthy I'll be happy" but even of there is something wrong,especially if not life threatening then I'll still be very happy with this baby!!

CareerGirl01 · 01/05/2013 14:19

When I first found out I was pregnant I did say to DH - 'wouldn't it be good if we had a boy - one of each'. Then I had to have a CVS and various other tests - then a bleed at 30 weeks. After that I've said '-as long as the baby is healthy'' as a way of making up for my guilt at preferring one sex over the other.

maryann970 · 01/05/2013 14:20

The standard thing people say is, 'nearly there!'....they have been telling me this since I was 24 weeks...I'm now 39+4 so it's wearing thin, haha

Smitten1981 · 01/05/2013 16:13

A few people asked "Was it planned?" when we announced the pregnancy. I always thought that was a very strange thing to say.

MarvellousYou · 01/05/2013 16:17

It's rude smitten all 3 of our children were planned, timing was out a bit that's all

BraveLilBear · 01/05/2013 16:39

Similar to that, Smitten is we had one person (DP's gran) ask if we were happy about this (had been planned and yes, very happy). And two people, one again, DP's gran, the other, randomly my younger sister: 'does that mean you're getting married then?'

Agree, though, Nappy it is a strange saying...

Pizdets · 01/05/2013 16:55

maryann, I told someone I'm 19 weeks and was told 'Oh, so very early days yet then' - do you think there's a magical time when you switch from 'early days' to 'nearly there'? Is there an inbetween?

Hyperhelpmum · 01/05/2013 17:06

You are insane...... When I told someone I was expecting number three. How f ing rude!

janey1234 · 01/05/2013 17:26

"so who's the father then...?" from a colleague. Cue everyone staring at her, and her having the decency to and follow it up with "well, I mean I presume it's your DP, but, you know...."

FWIW she's met DP and had no reason AT ALL to suspect he might not be the father. Think she's just bonkers and didn't know quite what to say at the time (not sure what's wrong with 'congratulations'!)

TigerSwallowTail · 01/05/2013 17:40

Hmm I'm not sure I agree with you completely that the 'as long as it's healthy' line is strange. DP and I have 2 dc with SN and have had 2 mc too. I'm 36 wks pg now and we didn't care what sex it is, we just hoped everything was ok with baby.

What comments I find strange are from people who know this isn't our first dc but still tell us we'll get a shock when the baby is here and we see how hard it is. We've already done it twice so know what having a newborn is like .

TigerSwallowTail · 01/05/2013 17:44

And other comments I've had from strangers;"what did you do that for?" and "could you not have just bought a book instead?"

how rude...!

afrikat · 01/05/2013 18:06

After getting asked by a guy at work if we were going to find out the sex I told him no, we wanted a surprise. He said 'it will give you something to push for'. Like if I knew it was a girl/boy I would just give up and let it stay in there!

Gerty1002 · 02/05/2013 08:37

I work in a pub and some of the regulars have said some corkers. One 21yo lad said: "eeeh I didn't think you'd get pregnant, you don't seem the type, I thought you were dead innocent!" ...as if I'm some teenager who has had a fumble behind the bike sheds! I'm 25 and engaged, and baby was v much planned! Also had: "You're too young to be pregnant!" A few times as I look younger than I am, and: "was it planned then?" Is a common one with people being utterly shocked that the answer is yes. Being treated/looked at likely be a naive pregnancy teen is wearing very thin now at 23 weeks...

Lj8893 · 02/05/2013 08:49

Gerty I have had similar responses to you, I'm also 25!

The "was it planned" line is wearing thin now, lots of that! And considering I have PCOS and many of the people using that line know that, I find it a very odd thing to ask!

When we first found out and we told both our families, DPs sister said "there are other options you know" WTF!!!

Bunnylion · 02/05/2013 09:05

Someone who's not your closes friend or family asking you if it was planned is so rude.

What do they expect you to say after that? "No, total accident, I'm having an aborting on Monday. Just thought I'd tell you so you've got some juicy gossip for the office/pub/gym/bingo-night etc".

Gerty1002 · 02/05/2013 10:29

Lj we thought I might have PCOS too, just as I was having third set of blood tests and after 9 months of trying I fell pregnant! Some people act as if it's a ridiculous age to get pregnant but to us it's perfect.

mouseymummy · 02/05/2013 10:43

I'm pg with number 3, dd2 is 7mo so its going to be a 55 week age gap (if going by due dates) EVERY SINGLE FRICKING PERSON I've told has done the face and said one of two things "aww it'll be like having twins" (my sis in law and brother have twins. Nope, not going to be anything bloody like having twins. You pillock) or "aww was it a happy accident?" Who bloody said it was an accident? Baby no 3 was planned, wanted and will be loved! Why do I need to clarify this?

It annoys the hell outta me tbh.

Lj8893 · 02/05/2013 10:55

Gerty, its crazy that people seem to think 25 is a mad age to have a baby when statistically your early 20s is when you are most fertile.....surely that makes 25 be the most natural age to have a baby?!

BraveLilBear · 02/05/2013 10:55

Gerty you just reminded me of another... 'what... already?' from my dad. We had told him in advance that we would be trying (so he could get his head round it). I'm 33 years old and been with DP nearly 3 years!

User21276799 · 02/05/2013 11:37

We have got a lot of: "another one? ALREADY?!" There'll be 19 months between them so I don't think it's that soon.

DH's aunt said: "No. You are not serious. This CANNOT be true" and was openly horrified. Again, 19 month gap, come on woman.

Childminder said: "Oh God. Not you as well". I did chuckle at that one - all her charge's mums are now knocked up it seems.

One friend almost cried when I told her (she wanted to be pregnant with DC2 first) and totally forgot to say congratulations...

Definitely not the same set of glowing and excited reactions we got first time round!

Snowflakepie · 02/05/2013 12:08

'We didn't think you would bother with such a big age gap...' 3.5 years is not a big age gap to me, actually it's working out perfectly thank you.

'But you don't like babies' true enough, but they aren't babies for long thank heavens.

My favourite though - 'where will we sleep when we come to stay then?' From my MIL. In the cot with the DC, obviously. Or try not staying for a change, that works for me too. Not that I'm deliberately filling every room in my house to avoid the visits, not one bit...

I was guilty of saying 'you crazy lady' to a friend when she told me she was expecting #3, with a 3 year old and 18 month old. It just came out. I did apologise, she has children who sleep so a very different experience to me, I just couldn't picture it for myself. She's still speaking to me at the moment.

Wickedgirl · 02/05/2013 12:38

I am 17 weeks pregnant with dc 4. I was asked this morning "don't you watch tv then?" Is it really that odd to have a 4th baby?

One if my male friends asked me if it was his? Wtf?..... We have never been any thing other than just friends. He really is like a younger brother. He is married (happily) so it was an odd thing to say even in humour.

Fakebook · 02/05/2013 13:05

I don't agree. I had DS after 4 miscarriages. I didn't care what sex he was when I had my 7, 9, 11, 12, 13, 15 and 20 week scans. I just wanted him to be healthy and stay alive. Same with this baby. I've 5 scans so far and I'm only 13 weeks. I want a healthy baby that I give birth to. Don't care if its a girl or boy.

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