Hyperemesis Support

[LucindaE]

We need a new thread.

I hope everyone suffering from the Horrors of Hyperemesis will find this thread useful as a source of support and information.

There's no TMI on here - can't be by definition - and nobody should feel ashamed of moaning as much as they feel the need to.

I used to include extracts from MOH's wonderful website
sites.google.com/site/pregnancysicknesssos/
but I think that makes this link less visible so am merely putting the link. The information on this site is invaluable for sufferers, with information about medications, coping strategies, hospital admissions, useful links, advice for family members, and much more.

I would like to thank MOH MOP Ovaltine bluebirdsunshine (I think she's changed her nickname) Fluffy, Horsey Kalidasa, Nannyl and Everyone who has given such invaluable support and advice on previous threads.

Remember when you are at your worst, 'This Too Shall Pass'. It really will.

Tallyra and Flo I so agree. wavesandsmiles You are sweet still to care for him, but such a selfish man is a problem waiting to happen to any woman. Hope you aren't feeling too bad.
Flo That heartburn is awful. I had to be on a horribly bland diet with that residual heartburn, but at least I was eating, unlike wavesandsmiles and others here. Will your dr give you ranatadine, I hear it's good? Flo Tell me you're not still working.
i wonder how Tiredfeet is, Bump and others?
Lucinda
xx

I am finally back to work tomorrow after almost 5 weeks off - mainly because I'm now on half pay thanks to having too much time off ill in the last 12 months (good practice for maternity pay I suppose). Will be working from home until I go on maternity leave in Oct and have had a new project given to me which takes me away from the v specialist and v pressured work I was doing - am pleased and relieved work have taken things seriously.

Being back at work will hopefully help me get some sort of routine again - am finally feeling a bit better, not been sick since Saturday and nausea is manageable now (eating ice cubes is my new hobby) although most protein (cheese and esp meat) makes me gag still. Am off the meds and feel less zombified.

Lucinda - I've been doing the fresh mint tea too, also finding ice cold water with mint leaves in really helps with the horrible sicky taste in my mouth and raging heartburn.

Actually went to bed feeling positive last night and didn't have anxiety dreams, just normal crazy pregnancy ones!

Hope all you other ladies are coping.

Sterlings Lovely to hear from you - I've been wondering how you've been doing. So glad you feel quite a bit better, and do take it as easy as you can at work and keep us informed. Glad the mint tea helps you too.
Lucinda
xx

Poor youwaves no wonder you feel stressed and more sick, I would be exactly the same. What a total shit, men seem to just move on so easily. Loser. I really believe in karma and he will get his just desserts. Stay strong and know that you will have the last laugh. A child will bring you a lifetime of rewards and he will miss that.
My DH is being a bit of a shit. He is really distant and seems to not give two hoots about me or the kids at the moment. Bit of déjà vu as he has done this during both my other pregnancies. What the hell is his problem? I just cooked the kids tea, read to them ( he refused just sat in other room stuffing his face with biscuits) then he shouted through 'are you going to tidy the garden.' I had friends over today so there were cups, a few toys and some sun tan lotion bottles to pick up. DS 1 was trying to sing his upcoming school play song and DH just got his phone out and logged onto Twitter. Afraid I lost it and told him he was being a rubbish dad and husband at the moment. He just seems to want to be doing anything than be with us. Has been out last 5 nights with work or to pub and suggested he was off to play golf tonight. Rally hurtful and just feed up. Sorry for my rant. This should really be on relationships thread but i feel I know you all here! On a brighter note sickness is SO much better. Off meds and nauseous but not vomiting. Massive progress. If DH keeps up this attitude it may return as knackered. Hugs to all.

Hyper I am lost for words about your DH shouting that.
He ought to be cherishing you, when you've been so ill and so brave.
Don't apologise for rant, rant as much as you like, we are all friends here... I'm glad you are a bit better, that's one thing. Did you say you were a teacher? Or is that OH? I think wvesandsmiles may be too.
Lucinda
xx

I'm a speech therapist. OH teacher. He's now saying things like 'alright grumpy?' acting like I'm in the wrong. Sigh, can't be bothered to argue. Feeling sick again so may just go to bed. Night all. Hope you are all having a good evening.

Hope you had a good sleep hyper and that today is ok for you. Your OH seems to be acting appallingly!

Well, I got made redundant yesterday..... Trying not to stress too much, and in some ways it is good news. And I won't start job hunting until the baby is here and the HG has disappeared.

I teach privately from home part time but my real job is/was in finance. Next bit of news in my life surely has to be good?

wavesandsmiles Oh no, poor you. I hope you get a big payoff. Can they do that while you are off with a pregnancy related illness? You are so right, a piece of wonderful news must come your way. I hope you win the lottery at least!
Hyper I hope he's sorry today. He should have done the tidying.

Tiredfeet and Everyone I hope you are coping OK.

Lucinda
xx

That doesn't sound quite right waves, are you site they can do that? I have no idea though, I think places often find a way round things that they shouldn't be able to. I also hope they are going to pay you a nice lump sum for doing thus at this point, a particularly stressful time for you.

Hello all...haven't been on in a long time so just checking in. Im sorry to see that so many of you are still so unwell. Hopefully it will pass soon. Just hang in there.

Lucinda, I'm happy to say I'm 34 weeks this weekend and while I'm still on the meds...I think the HG has passed or is at least still well controlled as I haven't been sick in a few weeks! I have two weeks to go until I start maternity leave and then hopefully my little bubba will be along soon after...keep thinking she may be early as I'm having really bad cases of braxton hicks...il take it over HG though any day!

Hang in there ladies...it will be worth it when we have our babies in our arms!

Waves, just read your last post...are you sure they can do that??? I'd check with your nearest cab if I were you!

waves that's awful. Last thing you need. OH being slightly better but feeling pretty exhausted and emotional (not to mention sick) a DS1 playing me up big time and will not stay in bed or go to sleep until about 9 pm. OH working in boarding house attached to our house so no help. In just so sick and getting up and down to DS antics not helping. OH has said he does not have patience to read / do school work/ teach him to ride a bike and has basically opted out. dS1 may have ADD and is very hard work. Just feel I cant do it all on my own when feeling so sick. I came in from work and Oh had made their tea. I sat in chair in kitchen feeling dreadful, on verge of puking (told him this) he says can you make them a drink? WTF I'm so tired and feel alone and unsupported. What is it with husbands letting us down? So upset by it I just can't even talk to him. He's so defensive. Any advice?

Oh hyper I wish I had some good advice for you It sounds like your OH is horribly unsupportive and unsympathetic. In a way I am glad mine is gone, as it is somehow easier to manage by myself knowing that there isn't someone here who should be helping! Have you thought about counselling? Probably not right now, with you being so ill. But at least you have here to vent a little. Sending hugs....

Re my redundancy, I'm not covered by UK law, so anything goes here, but at least I have a reasonable package. And my boss has been pretty awful, so in a weird way it is a relief, just hope I manage to get something lined up - planning to start job hunting September/October time

Hyper, I'm so sorry you have to go through this on top of the HG. I went through a similar thing when the HG was very bad. oH was basically quite selfish and didn't understand tr HG. Thought I was exaggerating despite the continuous vomiting...at times all over the floor! Unfortunately, I have no advice...talking just turned things into arguments with us. If it helps hes better now but only because I'm no longer being sick. Sending you gentle hugs and hoping your OH will fix up sooner than mine did x

Hyper Hugs. I wish I had some good advice, I do know most men don't seem to be able to appreciate how ill women are with this at all. It does put a huge strain on relationships. It must be so difficult with a LO with ADD as well. Does OH generally get more relaxed during the holidays you say he works long hours (though kids at home all the time are wearing)?
Not sure how far along you are, but with luck, if there is an improvement than as Reebok says the OH's seem to improve...
wavesandsmiles I was thinking you are outside UK law, but I wonder about European law, I would have thought anti sexual discrimination might come into it, though I may be wrong. I suppose it depends if you were the only person made redundant or something?
How is the jelly and tinned fruit?
Reebok Lovely to hear from you. Glad you are no longer being sick .
Lucinda
xx

Slightly better morning. Feeling horribly sick but me and DS2 tucked up in my bed watching Ben and holly on I pad! OH seems in a better mood so hopefully he might be more kind. I think he assumes I'm better as I'm up and about more. Still feel so sick alot. I'm 16 weeks now Lucinda OH working 8am-11pm sat, sun and Monday as on duty so hoping of if I take it easy today I might feel better tomorrow. I know what u mean waves in a way out of sight out of mind and you don't feel upset being expected to do everything. Better not to rely on anyone. Might take DS1 to GP to discuss sleep issues although we are seeing Paed in July. Hope everyone has a restful - ish day and not too sick. It's gone v quiet on here. Are we the last walking wounded waves?! Glad you feel south better Reebok

Just musing here hyper I wonder if there is any way to make him feel sick? has he had a bug recently? can you get him hangover drunk? then you can say to him 'this is how I feel. I'll help you as much as you've been helping me'.
A bit evil and vindictive but he might get the message?

Taylra I know what you mean. A man thinks a hangover is the end of the world and if you don't complain all the time, they assume your (more or less) OK, even if your being sick. I do so feel for everyone suffering on here in this weather.
Yes, it is extremely quiet on here...
Lucinda
xx

Hmmmm he needs no help getting hangover drunk but rarely feels sick! He had a tummy bug in April. Not sure i can poison him! Maybe I need to complain more and do less rather than get on with it despite feeling dreadful! Thanks for your kind thoughts.

I'm still here found a dosage of prochlorperazine that keeps the sickness at bay (if not the nausea) and allows me to function as normal. I forgot a dose last week -just one - and was sick for 3 days. 20 weeks tomorrow so it seems like it's in for the duration

So sorry to hear people still suffering so terribly, you do have my deepest sympathies

Labrador...try to stay positive. I was being sick at the same stage as you and I'm now 34 weeks...2 weeks without being sick! Hopefully you will get better. Keep taking those meds if they help. I'm a little scared to come off mine and think my doc may try to wean me of them soon! Arghh

sorry have disappeared! I went through a phase of being so tired all I have been able to do in the evenings is sleep! the good news is I have been able to cut down my meds to just one type, and I am functioning ok just get a bit nauseous etc towards the time the next tablet is due. but it is progress

Waves massive hugs from me, I cant believe your rotten luck! I really hope you get some good news soon, I can't think of anyone who deserves it more

hyper sorry to hear your DH is being an idiot. maybe could you try just being really blunt with him about how hard you are finding it. or just go back to bed even if you could cope with being up? so he has to get on with things?

my 'd'h is very remorseful now about how he behaved and realises he was a total idiot he is organising counselling and trying to understand why he behaved the way he did. in someways I feel really bad for him because I think the realisation you have treated someone awfully is a very hard one. but it is so much easier on my own than having someone criticising me and failing to support me. I have just taken the brave step of booking a few days in a mobile home for me and ds, our first holiday just the two of us! am hoping the sickness will have reduced further by then. I just think he really deserves a treat. will worry about money after that! but dh is paying the rent for now so we are managing.

I feel very detached from the pregnancy though, and I think its because of it having made me so sick. I don't feel at all bonded or excited. Has anyone else had this and have you got any tips? I am wondering if finding out the sex at 20 weeks might help perhaps?

(DS is being cute though and talks to the baby: "hello, where are you??? hello, we're eating lunch"...)

Tired, I can relate to the struggle to bond with bump. With me it was because I had a mmc last year and was convinced I would lose the baby...the 20 week scan helped a bit but it was mainly when I started to feel my baby move that I could bond. The HG also doesn't really help as you feel so rotten all the time. I remember having such dreadful thoughts about my LO and I felt so guilty for feeling them...but after having counselling, I realised it was the HG and history of mmc that was causing it. Now I absolutely love my baby and can't wait to meet her! Hoping things will improve for you!

I'm not bonding very well either. Daren't tell anyone though My DCs are all excited, and I have done lots of practical things, like sort clothes, and I now have hospital bags packed. But I think I am still SO caught up in the HG that I can't quite get my head round the fact that a baby is coming out of me relatively soon.

I certainly am not "anti" the baby, I just think that my efforts are entirely focussed on fighting the worst of the HG, and getting through each day. I don't have the physical or emotional energy to bond, although I know I love him very much. I have also got myself super worried that he is deaf as he doesn't respond to music (I play a lot myself) as my others did, and that if he is, it is because I haven't managed to keep enough down Irrational fears, but there we go.

I am having a belly cast done in about 2 weeks, and will be going to a wise woman workshop to do with empowerment in childbirth, in the hope that I am able to focus myself a little better. It's sad, I remember chatting away to my previous "bumps", and just can't find the energy this time.

I hope you and your DS have a lovely trip Tired

Reebok you are a week and a half ahead of me, as I am 32 + 3 today. Hopefully I might get a few days respite over the next few weeks - so glad that you are having an easier time now