Beanies, Bumps and babies...On the trip together!!!

[Nemo1977]

Hope nobody minds me starting a new thread but I only get 5 mins at a time to read and post and the thread is taking me that long to read and then when I click add message it takes forever.

ooooh h your next then...
whats your date again?
then me then stace then nemo
not posting as much as getting really tired now when i get in from work.

oh debs! just think though- almost there! but then you have the tiredness from sleepless nights ......

Caddy, mail me if you need me hon {{{{{Big Hugs}}}}}} your coping brilliantly and far better than I would do in your situation, I think your fab let us know if there is anything we can do to help, have you posted for any mumsnetters near you?? I'm sure there are a few? Is it possible for you/dh to get a homehelp type person in for a few days to lighten the load a little??

M&MB yes your next hon, ooooooohhhhhh exciting!

Bella, hope your feeling ok after the birth and enjoying time with Tabitha

Munz, Rom, DQ, Debsey, Nemo, CSWS and everyone else how are you all!

caddy (((hugs)))) keep tlaking to us hon, we're all here for you for some relief - I know it's not much but talking sometimes helps. will try to get your parcel out to you by the end of the week and when you get it MRS - u're to sit down and pamper yourself please don't be so hard on yourself, as I said before your far from home, could you possibly keep all of the children off of school for a few days so as you can all have some you time together? ((((hugs))) hope DS is feeling better soon. x

u know where I am if u need me.

Caddy - sorry to hear that things are so upsetting at the moment, is the little one on medication then? Or as its viral is it a bit tricky? mmmmm.........hugs, wish there was something I could suggest.

Well have admitted defeat here and my Mum is coming this afternoon to stay for a week as me and DH are just not coping with the lack of sleep and lack of an instruction manual! Hormones are raging here so keep weeping about how crap I am that I can't cope etc. Little Tabitha is going to be put through Granny's bootcamp! After me insisting that she stay away for a few weeks I phoned her at 1am the other morning begging her to come down and help!

Please tell me that everyone feels like this and its not just us that feel totally out of our depth?

Sorry just needed to be honest and get that off my chest - she's gorgous, just a lot more hard work that I realised!

So Me, then Debbsy, then Stace, then Nemo - weeks to go yet though, weeks! (well 4).

Caddy you are doing a fantastic job. It's hard to think so when you don't feel particulalarly organised or sorted on the inside I know, but as others have said on here if we can do anything to help you just let us know.

Bella, {{{Hugs}}} its not just you hon, everyone gets that feeling of OMG with their 1st, its totally new and your just expected to do it at least with jobs you get training right!
I often find doing a check list helps i.e. if they're crying they're doing it for one of the following:

Hungry
Nappy
Tired
Wind
Teeth
Just want a cuddle

I found when breast feeding, it helped no end to write down all of my feeds in a day, as to start with dd2 fed 13 times a day/night....argh! but after the 1st 6 weeks, she settled to 8 feeds a day, then dropped to 6 a few weeks later and by 6mths she'd gone to 5.
HTH's a bit and don't worry your a wonderful mum

M&MB

bella - agree with friz - acept all the help u can, don't do anything bar eat sleep and feed, let your DH do the wining nappy changes etc. whern baby's sleeping u sleep, and when you're awake DH sleeps - that's how we got threu the first few weeks anyhow. bit like strangers int he night but it's not forever.

(((Hugs))) it's totally normal to be feeling like this, how old is tabitha now? - remember around 4 day I think it is you milk will be coming in and that day (or 2/34 days there after) you'll be so hormonal and over the place but it's all antural hon. you're not crap, and you can cope - it's new to you as much as tabitha, so you'll both be learning together! give yourself a break hon, babies are not easy!

Thanks so much for the words of advice & comfort.
My Mum arrived yesterday and things feel a lot calmer now. She has taken Tabitha out in the pram so me and DH can have showers etc. Have had some sleep and almost feel human again!

Thanks for letting me moan - just felt better admitting I was finding it hard!

we all find it hard bella - believe me you are not alone - and I defy any woman who says having NB is easy. just remember to get plenty of rest - even if it's not sleep just sitting/laying down doing nothing is still resting.

Thanks Munz - think we were in complete ignorance of how hard it would be - feel like we are slightly getting on top of things. Am dressed - that's a start !!

Oh my goodness can't believe I missed your post Bella and I've been watching out for you too. I'm sorry.

Sending you hugs - it is hard during the first few days and weeks, but it does get easier, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Like everyone else says - feed yourself, feed Tabatha and then sleep when she does or a least sit down and put your feet up in front of crap TV - ignore the rest. You will be doing brilliantly it just takes a bit of adjusting and the 3 of you will get there.

H xx

Hey everyone how you all doing?? Bella how's it going now??
Been busy with real life here!! managed to take all the kids to see Hoodwinked at cinema on Sat even dd2 (7mths!) sat thru the whole film with no screaming!! wow 1st time I've been to flicks in ages!

Wow that's some acheivement Friz - debating whether to risk trying DS with a matinee one afternoon during half term - think I may well give it a go lol

wow frizbe thats some going
hi all
mandmb not long now

Hello all, what's happening today then? I've done Yoga! (avec creche)

Bella, Thinking of you and remembering just how hard it was with our first as well and I didn't have a setion.

All of the advice here is brilliant but you need to take it if it is to help. Remember to take care of yourself because that is what Tabitha needs most. The housework will wait or can be done by others. Eat, Drink, Feed the baby and sleep. Don't even get up except for a cuppa or to watch a program on TV.

Nine years on do you think that I remember how many loads of dishes and laundry piled up during those first horrific weeks? Tabitha won't know a thing about the state of the house when she was a newborn so try to concentrate on you and her while DH and your mum muddle through with the chores.

My week end was a NIGHTMARE... I started out by borrowing a DVD from a really amazing mum from the kids' school who must have noticed that I was on the edge of a nervous breakdown because she was really, really kind to me having only spoken to me briefly one other time weeks ago.

We made popcorn after dinner and watched the movie in our jammies but when I went to put the kids to bed I discovered 6 angry hornets upstairs and everyone flew into a panic. I tried to kill them but the baby was awake and crying which cause the children to start crying because there was nothing I could do and they were locked away safely in the bathroom with a crying baby while their insane mother tried to murder huge bugs. In the end, I just gave up and we stayed in a hotel. I am sure that my DH now knows that I have lost the plot entirely because we certainly didn't have a getaway in our budget. I just really could not cope with the idea of staying in the house.

I do have to say that it is the first time in over 8 weeks that I have slept for more that a few hours at a time. There was no clock to watch and no chores to drag me out of bed so I slept like a log. I just wish that it had led to a pattern change but I have not slept since being back in the house Saturday. My mum is convinced that I should go to the GP and ask for meds of some description (figures!!) but I just really need to sort out our chaotic lives and get DH to hear what I am saying about the need to sort out our house/finances rather then take little day trips to the country.

I am so exhausted and dysfunctional that it is just not believable. I am sure that I should not be driving in this state let alone taking care of 4 children on my own.

Thankfully DH did come home on Saturday but he had to pay for the flight himself. The freaking CHEEK!!!!!

DS2 is longing for me to be done on this computer (he is still not at nursery ) because he wants to watch Post Man Pat so I will hit Post Message and stop my moaning.

Thanks for all of your kind words. I know that this will pass as well.

Cheers

How are you doing Bella?
Have you let your mum take over the house things. I remember my mum doing the ironing mountain and it was fantastic.

It seemed to get easier for me once I finally "got" that all I really needed to focus on was feeding, changing and then getting baby to sleep. Before that I seemed to be running around like a headless chicken. It helps once those pesky hormones chill out a bit too. It all gets easier I promise.

Caddy, it all sounds very hectic for you at the moment (perhaps an understatement?? ). Wish I could pop on a plane and give you a break for a little while. You seem to have so many things to sort out. And hornets??? I do think your escape to a hotel was legendary though.

When is your DH coming home for any length of time? It sounds like you need to share the load a bit with him at the moment. Hope things get better soon for you.

Friz, have found our local sports centre creche - OMG it's fantastic!!!
2 hours just for me (a bit of swimming then coffee and magazines and a bit of peace) it is bliss.

Evening ladies.

How are things going now Bella? I too found the early days and weeks very hard going, not helped by the fact that DD wouldn't ever stop screaming and crying (due to milk intolerance it eventually turned out)! I hope that your mum is helping lots with the chores so that you are free to look after Tabitha. Being dressed in the morning already sounds like a big achievement to me! My house it still a dirty tip, but it really doesn't seem to matter all that much anymore!

Cadmum - what a tough time you are still having - life never seems to get any easier for you does it?! Staying in a hotel to get away from bugs sounds like the sort of thing that I would do, if only packing wasn't such a chore to me!! Maybe it would be worth listening to your mum on this occasion and getting some meds to help you sleep a little. A week or two of good sleep should enable you to feel like a different person, and you can then think more clearly about how you will manage longer term.

Hello to everyone else - hope you're all well .

Having a good week here. Doing CC to eliminate night feeds, and (touch wood!) it seems to be working.

,orning all

Cadders...huge hugs to you hunny you have so much to cope with I really dont envy you at all!!!

Bella hugs to you too..I remember A being 3days old and lying on the bed sobbing wondering why on earth we had wanted a baby. Believe me in a little while things will click and you will begin to enjoy it..just take all the help offered.

Hope everyone else is ok..it was As 3rd bday yesterday which was sad as he is growing up soo much..also he wasnt well and ended up having to take him to A+E as his willy swelled up about 4 times normal size so now on a dose of antibiotics. /Felt sorry for him as we bought him a bike but it was too uncomfortable for him to ride it. Err nothing else her apart from got to have stupid GTT again due to A being big baby but seems like a waste of time as H was a tiddler hey ho..

Oh no Nemo, not the GTT again you were ok last time....still better safe than sorry I guess, what are you supposed to do with the two kids in tow then?!
Caddy {{{Hugs}}}} agree with George tho, the hotel is legendary very cheeky for UN to make dh pay for the plane back tho, its them running him around all over the place, with no break for family time, that's causing you all this spot of bother in the 1st place, they're not winning any awards for family friendlyness are they?
Hope your mum being over is easing the burden a bit and you can start to sort yourself out.

well hello everyone not posted in a while because of extreme insomnia waking up at 2 not dropping off till 5 then got to get up for work at 7 and drive 200 odd miles as im a medical rep and now feel shattered and ive got another 4 weeks to go with work grrrrrr sorry for rant any advice though would be fab.
i will catch up with everones news im just sooooo tired!!!

Hello,
my mum has been given the 'all clear' medically to fly and the best part is that she is on her way here for Saturday!

I am so relieved because I just cannot go on like this and I can't really imagine how it will improve unless I have help.

Now I just have to decide what I am going to accomplish before she arrives. Shall I leave everything in this state so that she can see just how poorly I am coping or should I at least try to have the cleaning done so that we can concentrate on the unpacking and settling in tasks?

Bella, how are things going for you? Are you feeling any more on top of things? I did mean to mention that the sooner you give in and accept that Tabitha is now the boss, the sooner you will feel more in control. But seriously, I do hope that you are managing to get some rest and taking care of yourself.

Hello to everyone else. I am off to fold laundry and clean the kitchen and bathrooms since that must be done at a minimum before mum arrives Saturday afternoon.

DS2 is being amused today by DS1 who is home ill with a mystery fever. Seems odd that this is his only symptom but I suspect that a cold or some other nasty bug will be soon to follow. I thought that is must be 'school-itis' until I felt the heat radiating off him from a few feet away. The poor lad is genuinely sick on top of everything else. Charming--NOT!!! For now they are watching recordings of Time Team (we don't have TV...) I am not sure when that series starts over but if anyone would like to do me an immense favour, I would LOVE to have a video of this years Time Team... DS1 adores all things on the discovery channel but really misses Time Team especially.

Debsy, I meant to add that you have my sympathy and empathy on the insomnia front. With the exception of Friday night at the hotel, I have not slept past 5 am since August. I am awake nearly every hour at some point and by 5, I just need to get out of bed and do something.

Have you have already tried warm milk and a banana before a warm bath and then bed? It worked for me about 50% of the time whilst pg with DD2...

Hope it passes soon as you will need your sleep before your LO arrives.