Pregnant after a miscarriage, as the bumps get bigger we get braver, 1st,2nd or 3rd trimester, reasurance and hand holding aplenty!

[StateofConfusion]

Before the first thread fills and locks a 2nd thread for us getting braver!

Wow, State I am most impressed! Tell us about it, please! What brand dud you choose? What colour? Does it have a base? I was so in denial with dd2 that we bought nothing until after she was born... I still feel sad when I remember looking at her and wondering how I never believed that we would actually be bringing a baby home at the end of my pregnancy. My mum picked up a few outfits and some nappies at BabiesRUs in Times Square before she came to visit us. Dh bought a car seat without me at the same shop the next day. Our older dcs helped him choose one.

I wonder if this pregnancy will be the same? I fear so because I am fraught with worry and cannot imagine a baby in April late March.

I want my pregnancy with DS1 back! Sailed through, the thought of losing him never really occurred to me, little bad symtoms and text book.
After all the Mcs inbetween this pregnancy seems to be going well but with sickness, tiredness and everything else going on, including passing out/ blacking out in the middle of Tesco's today I am feeling more and more anxious (which I don't think is helping!). normally I am a calm and very rational individual!! I'd like my sanity back! Feeling so humiliated, I came round in tears with everyone staring at me and the store had called my husband, by the time he got there I was fine! WE've had so much stress recently caused by extended family and circumstances beyond our control, I actually feel as if I am losing the plot completely! Think today was a blood pressure/ low sugar thing but really shook me up.

Oh alpha you poor thing, its terrifying and worse when other stuffs going on. I found early on dizzyness got me a lot, eating little and often helped keep me going! Take care xx

cad we've got the Britax baby safe shrII with d-sip, and the belted base, got all black as having a look and a feel it seemed the toughest easiest to clean fabric. Its lovely to use, we had a maxi cosi cabrio for the older one and I found it fiddly to use and impossible to get off the pram, this one is all one hand release, one button to move the handle etc. Really am pleased with it.
15% off in kiddicare so £150 for both which I'm quite happy with, just gotta get the adapters to click it on the pram (which I had from dd) now and I'm done. All I've got new is the carseat/base, bottles just incase bfing doesn't work and dummys. Everything else is from family, nct sale etc.
I've put it off as long as I could but I'm 34wks now and ds arrived at just under 37wks and with dds birthday and christmas the fear was less than my urge to be prepared.

Sorry I've been a bit quiet on Mumsnet and you'd all disappeared off my Theads I'm On page!

Still tootling along, am 23+2 today and am starting to feel a bit uncomfortable and am not particularly enjoying being pregnant, which is rubbish. I'm tired and a bit fed up if I'm honest. Ah well - I think it's just because I have a cough left over from this cold I had and it's just making me a bit miserable. I wake up in the middle of the night coughing and spluttering and it's horrible, particularly when my pelvic floor isn't the best... Sorry for whinging!

Is it really weird that I find all of your stressing reassuring? State how exciting to think that in 3 weeks (although hopefully holding out a bit longer!) your baby could be here! Cad I have bought stuff off ebay this time as determined that if anything goes wrong I will not be weeping into lovingly bought sleepsuits from mothercare but instead will find some reassurance in the fact that all the baby clothes I have cost around £10 for the lot! Alpha take care of yourself and if it happens again, get checked out. It is a stressful enough time without any other factors and when you have a lot going on you can forget to look after yourself properly. When my dad died last year I found it really hard to eat and only the fact I was pregnant made me, think of feeding the little bean rather than yourself. Knickers congratulations! Fingers crossed that everything goes well for you this time round.

My panic: I keep thinking that something is bound to go wrong and, with this mindset, I am now getting more stressed the further along I get as I think I could have coped with another mc but now am in the realms of having a stillbirth if anything happens which frightens me much more. I don't know whether this comes from having the mc last time at 16 weeks and therefore being in that no mans land of being too far along to have a D&C so having to deliver my baby but it not being recognised at a birth as such? Anyway, I know nothing will reassure me but it is good to know there are people who understand my neurosis as I don't feel able to share these feelings with people in RL as I think it would make them uncomfortable!

To all those of you waiting for scans, good luck. I hope that in 9 months we have a raft of new babies from this thread.

(Apologies for yet another essay, will have to check in more often so I can write less each time )

Sorry your feel rubbish possom hopefully it will all pass soon and you'll get some umpf back xx

We like essays 001 and that's why we all share our panics and stresses to reassure each other, I actually have a confession, I refused to get out of the car and go buy the carseat until the baby moved a few times, I was terrified of finally parting with a whack of cash and something had gone wrong, I had no reason to think anything had except paranoia. I've done the same as you got bundles off ebay/fb and have been given bits, trying not to put too much thought/emotion into it.
It must have been horrendous to be in that unknown grey area no wonder your anxious.

I'm pretty sure though a year from now there will be many snuggly bundles on this thread, and we can all be neurotic about first jabs, snuffles, the baby licking the rug :)

Thanks 001. I think quite a lot of the pregnancy paranoia is normal. With my wildly successful 1st pregnancy (silently doffs cap to DS, asleep in pushchair in hall) I felt exactly the same. Didn't tell a soul till 13 weeks, didn't post anything on facebook (still wouldn't actually, not my thing), and although I bought all the baby stuff you're told you need I kept it all in the original packaging, with the receipts, in case I had to return it all. When the baby did arrive, I spent weeks frantically washing babygros then trying to find somewhere to put them all!

Point is, having a baby is such a miraculous mysterious thing, it's hard to get your head around at all, let alone when you've suffered losses.

you know, pregnancy paranoia is totally normal, even without a previous loss, and how much more so if you have had a miscarriage. With my first we didn't get anything till 30 weeks, and even then only because the consultant told us to be prepared for induction at 32 weeks due to ishoos. I had planned only to start buying once I went on maternity leave at 36 weeks! I'm the same this time round. 32 + 2 and not got anything new apart from bottles and steriliser, as they were on offer, and of course I kept the receipts. Was looking at new cot mattresses on line, but have decided not to order till baby comes. Baby will sleep in the crib until then, and the mattress for that was only used for 5 weeks and is full sealed in pvc so is fine, I think... We have however got the new born and tiny baby sized clothes out of the loft, and the car seat.

001 I get your worry. I'm with you on the doom and gloom, the thinking that the longer you go the greater the worry re still birth, and that no man's territory between an early mc and that. . Actually, at 32 weeks now I'm feeling pretty hopeful, even if baby came today he'd stand a really good chance. You are absolutely not being neurotic. When my mum was pg with me the Dr would not even consider you pregnant till you had missed 2 periods, so were at least 8 weeks gone, in many ways I think it must have "shortened" the pregnancy and therefore the worry. In so many cultures new borns and very small children are not invested with too much permanence, because those early days and years are so precarious. I'm jewish, and the culture is not to name boys publicly till they are circumscised, partly for this very reason (girls tend to be "announced" at a time that suits the family, but that's a whole other thread).

possum sorry you're not feeling great. I think this "blooming" in the 2nd trimester thing is a bit of an urban myth actually! I've had a terrible cough (diagnosed finally as asthma). It's only in the last 48 hours or so after using steroid inhaler for a week that I've stopped wetting myself several times a day! It's certainly made me work on my pelvic floor! On Thursday the cough was so bad that it made me vomit. It's happened before lots of times, but never when driving at 70mph. I couldn't pull over and was just sick all over myself and the car, and a bit on the windscreen and steering wheel. I actually cried!

alpha I get the low blood sugar and low BP thing. Last time I had my BP measured the MW looked at me with a worried expression and asked if I was OK. it was 98/60 which is actually a little high for me! I try to keep snacks on me for emergencies (well, a couple of boiled sweets) and drink plenty. And sit down before I fall down whenever possible.

Hi, is it ok if I join in? I'm 7+0 with my 6th pregnancy. I have 3 boys aged 6, 4 and 22 months. I've had 2 missed miscarriages, 1 in 2005 at 12 weeks (baby died at 6 weeks) and the other in 2011 at 13 weeks (baby died at 9 weeks). DS2 has Ehlers Danlos syndrome and currently being investigated for arthritis so I was a nervous wreck before I got pregnant and now I'm heading towards complete insanity. Symptoms are the same as last time I miscarried, tiredness, sore boobs and on and off nausea with vomiting about 3 times in total and a bit of dry retching too which isn't helping the panic. No early reassurance scans here, just the dating scan at 12-14 weeks.

Hi ladies just checking in. Noah is 2 weeks old today I really can't believe it. I look at him and can't believe that its been less that a year since I lost my little bean and I now have a very beautiful baby boy in my arms. I had a really big wobble on the weekend thinking about my mmc but I guess I had to get the baby blues at some point.
I spent a very long 5 days in hospital with an infection and a lot of pain. I am currently on day 12 of my antibiotics and I have another 5 days to go. Well I better go seen as I have 3 dc to put to bed. Thinking of u all xxx

tis I Nocluenoclue at all (NCed back to my old name, suits me better) I remember you from one of the many MC / pregnancy threads we were both on. So happy to hear you have a beautiful baby boy in your arms now. Congratulations!

Great to hear from you swansea sorry you've had a rough time hope the anti bs do there job and your ok soon. Noah is an excellent name, its what we've settled on if this wrigglers a boy!

Welcome ellie sorry to hear you've had such a tough time, I've found symptoms are no gauge in a sucessful/unsucessful pregnancy so try not to focus on that too much, also pregnancys following mc are statistically more likely to suceed. I waited for 12wks for my scan too, turned out I was 10wks, was in the wtf cycle after the mmc though. Fingers crossed for you and your always welcome to off load here xx

As for me, 34+2 now, off to get final bits for the hospital bag tomorrow. Despite my alien bump wriggling around I still cannot believe I'm having a baby!

Hi ellie and congratulations! Very jealous of your 3 boys, I think we will be stopping at 2 for practical reasons, also don't know if I could take the stress of another pregnancy, but would love 3 or 4, maybe one day! Have you a date for your scan yet? I will be keeping fingers crossed for you.

swanseamum so happy to hear Noah is well! I also love that name so we could end up with loads of Noahs running around the thread :-)

Yay Swansea and yay Noah!

Good luck with the shopping State. My best wishes to everyone panicing. I am still panicing too - see midwife on Friday. Have convinced myself baby is already gone - I have no symptoms at all apart from no period and a positive test. Am tired of course but I usually am, pregnant or not! Find myself wanting a spot of morning sickness.

Agree with Alpha - with my first pregnancy I never gave miscarriage a thought - I just worried about anomally scans, stretch marks and getting stuck in the bath!

milli...you aren't alone with how you are feeling..I feel the same
Knew this pregnancy (after MMC) wouldn't be easy emotionally..but don't expect this dread..all the time. Don't feel I can even be happy about it which makes me so sad
Got midwife in 2 weeks..will be 8 weeks. Then hoping for scan about 11-11.5weeks. Any good distraction methods til then??

wifey and mili I agree. One of the worst things about the mmc is that it means I can't have that happy pregnant time, just worry and sadness. Not long until scan now (26th) and just trying to have good vibes.

When is your scan grain? Can't see all posts on phone.
I wish we all had the lovely belief of pregnancy=healthy baby...
But unfortunately we all have had that confidence & belief ripped away from us.

Sorry...just noticed you added the date grain

Bloody hell - letter come through for dating scan already! November 27th - they know the date of my last period (28th Sept) - so does this seem quite early? Don't know why I am complaining - was going to ask the midwife on Friday for an earlier scan.

Wifey and grain - you just can't enjoy it can you? There is always that nagging doubt at the back of your mind. Dread is exactly the word for it - sometimes I will be sitting thinking and then realise I have been holding my breath for ages - I only realise when I have to gasp for air.

Luckily not much time to think - my poor boy has a cold and is toddling round with the snottiest nose!

That's great about your scan date milli...
Aww bless your DS...colds are awful for little ones.
My DS is definitely keeping me busy..but I still find my mind wandering in to the 'what ifs' & trying to be practical should anything bad happen between now & Christmas. how awful to even think that?
None of us should have to
Midwife said its my mind preparing itself for practicalities but I am to try my hardest to relax & enjoy this new pregnancy.
Easier said than done though isn't it?
Trying to be positive & of course sending positive vibes to everyone here
Have many of you told families & friends?
We have told our mums & I have told 1 close friend.

Oh Wifey6 - congrats was wondering how you was getting on!
I know how nervous you must be, will be thinking of you with all crossed!
It will be nice for you to share with the old thread when your up to it!

Aww thank you count....this time feels terrifying.
6 weeks and feeling very achy.
How are you doing?
Sorry...can't check all posts on phone

Great that you have an early scan mill

Good to hear from you wifey the first 3 months I was just paralysed with fear. Hope your ds is better soon xx

I've experienced tightenings and braxton hicks for the first time today, they're not nice, never ever had them before. Absolutely terrified me as I'd left dp with the car and got the bus to the next town to go shopping with my Mum. I am also now to pregnant to do shopping. 34+3wks now.